You're not interested in getting a boyfriend. You're busy with life and just don't have time. But your girlfriends convinced you to hit the club. So you're at a table scrolling through your phone, and happen to glace up. Across the room you make eye contact with a guy. You smile, and he takes this as an invite to approach. Now he's talking to you, buying you a drink, and you just wishing he'd leave. Three hours later, he's been by your side the whole time and invites you back to his place. You say no and he's pissed. You mark him down as another man only interested in sex. You complain to your friends that guys think that just because they buy you a drink they think you owe them.
But what if this was your fault?
What if you really were leading him on?
Were you sending mixed signals?
He offered to buy you a drink, you don't owe him anything, right?
Many times women send the wrong signals without even intending to. Some women have traits that guys read as "green light". You might not intend to breadcrumb, but maybe you are.
So what are some ways that women do this? These are ways to avoid sending the wrong message (or to send the "green light" if you actually want to).
You go on date. You really aren't all that interested but in the conversation you say things that hint at a later date. After all you like him, but don't LIKE him, so it would be fun to get together later, just not as a date.
Right now you are hinting at a future relationship. Since you're on a date, he is reading your future "plans" as date invites, not hang outs. So when you tell him it's not going to work, but you want to be friends, he accuses you of leading him on.
And he's right, even if that's not what you intended. Often times we as women don't want to hurt or insult guys, so we are nice, and end up being accused of "playing them".
Back to the original club example.
What went wrong here? Well for one you talked to him for three hours. He read this as "Exclusivity". Guys compare your behavior with them, to you behavior with other guys. So when you talk to him exclusively he's gonna think somethings up. If you don't want him to think your interested, work the room.
One of the easiest way for a guy to gauge interest is by buying you a drink. This is something plenty of women will refuse.
So when you say yes, this isn't a sure signal your interested in him, but it's a signal that your not uninterested in him... if a guy offers to buy a second drink, and you accept, this is typically a more sure sign to him.
Oh and by the way even if he buys you 20 drinks, you still wouldn't owe him anything. That's a chance he's taking... but you'd be a vixen to accept if you're not interested