I am a Bisexual Male Christian Who is in the Closet...Diversify Your Perspective!

I grew up in a christian background. My mother and father are both pastors of a church. My brother is also a pastor of a church and I grew up in church my entire life. I am your stereotypical choir boy that turned out to be bisexual. I am writing this mytake in an attempt to at least diversify the opinions of men and women when it comes to bisexual men because there is still so much stigma surrounding being a bisexual male that I feel as if it isn't safe for me to come out.

I am a Bisexual Male Christian Who is in the Closet...Diversify Your Perspective!

American society doesn't allow for men to be bisexual due to societal double standards. Most people would ostracize me if I came out. Many women find bisexual men disgusting and many men dislike the notion of being around a bisexual male. Granted, I have noticed a heart warming amount of women and men that accept me for who I am and for those women and men that do accept me for who I am, I notice you and I love you.

I am a Bisexual Male Christian Who is in the Closet...Diversify Your Perspective!

I recently met a guy online that I find so incredibly attractive in every way possible that it isn't even funny. I don't find most men attractive and most women attractive in general. However, the man that I met has an almost identical personality to me and looks stunning. I truly see a future with this person. However, I am scared that one day when him and I go out in public and hold hands or kiss that we will be attacked or ostracized by the court of public opinions for being bisexual. I truly see a future in which I could potentially end up loving this guy. However, if I come out to my parents about him, they will most likely never talk to me again.

I am a Bisexual Male Christian Who is in the Closet...Diversify Your Perspective!

I want all of the men and women on GAG to know that there are so many bisexual and gay men out there that haven't come out for similar reasons to mine. I am telling my story because if I don't then you women and men will never know about it. I have to say something otherwise we will never achieve true equality in the LGBT community.


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Most Helpful Girls

  • We love you I understand what your saying
    Be ready to cut ties if you come out you seem to understand well hopefully if you do they can get over it in time and realize it's fine

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Most Helpful Guys

  • Come out of the closet and live your life

    Nothing wrong with being bisexual

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  • We do accept you. Don't care what people think

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What Girls Said 49

  • Okay.

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    • What's that suppose to men?

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    • Lmao fraudian slip dude

    • Please explain how you can have all these Christian pastors in you life, and be raised in a Christian environment and yet reject what the Bible say - that laying with someone of the same sex is an abomination to God. You want to get the meal but apparently don't want the gravy. God is not locked. Whatever you do you will be accountable for on the Day of Judgement.

  • . I know you believe in Christ but he also wants the best for you and He knows that lying with a man is wrong and not of God. Don't reject your first love ( Christ) over lust, but continue to understand how much Jesus loves you till this day as your alive.
    Also if you personally had feelings for men, the bible says to renew your mind. I learned at church today that if you want to control your emotions change your thinking, according to his word, and if you want to control your thinking, also change what your exposed to. And as you turn away from that thinking, God says He will help change you to follow whats good. Philippians 2:13: “For God is working in you, giving you the desire and the power to do what pleases Him.” but choose to to sin and renew your mind, as a loved child of God.
    Romans 12:2 "Don't copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will learn to know God's will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect" :)

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  • I'm a christian and am totally for gay rights. We need to understand that the Bible is not as completely timeless as we would like to believe.
    The Bible never condemned slavery but instead told people how to live with it.
    The Bible told women who were raped to marry their rapist because during those times a woman could not be married if she was no longer a virgin. Those days women were like property and husbands were picky on the type of property she was.
    The Bible said that if a woman was out in public on her menstrual cycle she would have to be killed.
    The Bible mentions that you are to be murdered if you do not recognise the sabbath.
    People don't realise that virgin Mary was about 12 years old when she married Joseph and Joseph is thought to be a widower aged between 70-90.
    Abraham and Sarah were siblings. They had the same father different mothers.
    Many christians might argue with this saying that this stuff is no longer practiced because it is the "old covenant". But lets get real and acknowledge that even Jews do not practice the above. The main reason most of this stuff is no longer practiced is because someone learnt to love their neighbour and saw their life to be more valuable than a rule. Human rights are very important in our society today and the above would violate a lot of human rights.
    The one law that cancels every law is "Love your neighbour as you love yourself." Once you do that, the way you see gay people or bisexuals is different. They are consenting adults who are not abusing human rights. Just because I don't understand much about being gay/bi does not mean I should treat them in a different light. Love is very important and we need to have it in us to understand others.

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  • If you really believe in the Bible, it says that " people that practice such things ( like homosexuality) you will not inherit the Kingdom of God. That means that you have not forsaken the life style and still do it. God said homosexuality is an abomination. God says that, not me.

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  • As a bisexual women I wish there were more bisexual men! I hate the stigma against us bis and bi men definitely have it worse... it took me a long time to be comfortable with my sexuality and to this day only my partner and close friends know. Just know you're not alone! Stay strong, love and dont let anyone make you feel bad for who you are

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    • Yeah, there is still a stigma against bisexual men. However, a lot of the stigma is changing. In the next ten years bisexual men could be more accepted. More men and women seem to have accepted me on here than I thought would. Thank you for surporting me because not everyone does as you can see in the comments.

    • Correction- supporting

    • No problem! We all gotta stick together! :)

  • I am a lesbian who is a Christian. Getting married soon

    Just be happy of who you are

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    • Look at how many down votes you are receiving. This is my point. Society seems to hate us.

    • Online haters who are jealous that I am getting married to a beautiful smart woman

  • Be yourself and do not care what the haters say

    Being bisexual is normal, and most people in the western world have no issues with it

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    • It feels like many people have an issue with it in the United States.

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    • Many people are low i. q in the states

    • @Wowgirl10q Mostly the southern states where Education is at it's lowest and Poverty is at it's highest as a result.

      Unfortunately, there is a trend of the South "Rising Again" which is alarming to anyone who hasn't been taking advantage of the south's ignorance.

  • Definitely a double standard, but you know what? Be yourself. Be who you want to be and love who you want to love. If your parents don't agree, who cares, they don't control you or your life. If your friends diss you, turn your back and find better people.
    And this is not just for you, also for whoever reads this message, in whatever situation you find yourself.

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    • The only way to change the double standard is for more men to come out about it. I may be considered disgusting now but in the future if enough men come forward, it will one day be considered normal.

    • There will always be someone who finds you disgusting, just gotta learn to say f them and move on with your life. No use crying over them :/

  • I think the best thing to do is to come out to your family. Honesty is usually the best option, and with time they may come to accept it.

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    • They may also disown me and ostracize me.

    • I'm so sorry you have to go through this. I faced a similar problem when I came out to my family. If you think that telling them will put you in physical danger then please do not do it. But I still stand by my choice to tell them even if now they think differently of me.

  • I have a similar background, binen and raised in church, I know the expectations. I am straight, though.
    Listen. You will have to be prepared for the first reaction of your parents/family. They most likely will reject you. But in the end they will accept you for who you are. I’ve seen it many times. It may take them years but it will eventually happen. Hang in there. They want to see you happy... because they love you. Show them that you are happy. And be brave. I send you a big big hug.

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  • I am bisexual, but not religious

    Tell your family and be happy. No need to hide it

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  • I hope God forgives me for that I only commented on this post to gain xper

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    • And that is exactly why I am posting because even though there are some women that love me, there are also women like you that hate me.

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    • 🤗🤗🤗

    • @Wowgirl10q :-) :-)

  • All I can say is I don't know you - but from what I can tell you sound like a wonderful person. I'm very supportive of the LGBT community and I am proud that you decided to come out online to us, because even that can be a tremendous first step. I'd suggest telling your closest friends first if you can - and possibly telling each of your family members separate so its not coming at you all at once. I'd confide with this "partner" of yours and admit your fears to him and get his opinion and possibly his advice. But above all I just hope this goes good for you and I can say that your an admirable person. I grew up in a very religious family too, a religion that literally doesn't allow anyone to be anything but heterosexual, so I can understand your struggle. I'm bisexual too and I've admitted this to some of my friends which has been easier then I expected. As I grow I hope to become more confident, and I hope you do too. Best of wishes <3

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  • True. I think more guys are getting ok with being bi or attracted to guys without guilt from old time parenting and religion beliefs.

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    • Yeah, in the next 10 years, it will probably be normal.

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    • You are so lucky! I live in the south.

    • Oh, ya. I know what you mean. It is tough there for you.

  • Amen

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  • Just come out of the closet and live your life to the fullest

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    • Believe me, I want to but the amount of backlash and the broken personal connection with my family may not be worth it.

    • If your family might hate you, they might be the wrong people to be with

    • No his family has an option so does he

  • I never understood people hating the LGBT, it's not like you chose to have feelings for the opposite sex nor is it harming anyone. It's two consenting adults that want to be together why not let them be. I really hope you have the courage to come out and be with your lover. Even if it means cutting ties with family it can start the process of helping you find yourself.

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  • Fake Christians Will Tell You What You Want To Hear.
    Real Christians Will Tell You What God's Word Says And Offend Not Only You But Society As You Know It.

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    • Well, people tend to not like when cults try imposing their fucked up doctrines on them. Imagine that...

  • I believe you have the right to live your own life. But I could never date a bisexual man.

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    • And I understand that many women wouldn't. However, after doing a poll on here, around 60% said they would.

    • That’s fine. But there is no way I would

  • I am a Bisexual Christian, it is difficult, especially if the church is extremely conservative.
    i know i am late checking this post so am not fully caught up but have you come out to your parents and do they accept you?
    i hope they do. my parents are atheist and yet they accept me.
    this video below helped me a lot:
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gmp6lLct-fQ
    its a summary of the key passages and an alternative interpretation of the key passages. hope this helps.
    God made you, God loves you and he will keep you safe even when you can't see it.
    i will be praying for you, for your journey. Good Luck Brother.

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    • You aren't late at all. I am glad you support me because as you can see in the comments below, not everyone done. I did decide to come out to my parents and they gave me the reaction that I expected. They ostracized me. They are definitely not okay with it. You are very fortunate to have parents that accept you.

    • Do you wish to talk more privately? I have a few phone numbers I can send you which can provide free and impartial advice. Plus I have been through this to some extent (not with coming out to my folks but with my church) yes and its scary, but Jesus is the light that helps us see through the darkness. I want to help you , but I also want to respect your privacy by offering the space to talk over PM. I'm not fussed either way, pick whichever will make your more comfortable, and know that you, brother, are loved as you are.

  • I support you. You are really brave to come out. Fuck the haters!

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  • Nothing wrong with being bisexual

    Best of both worlds

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    • Think about the next guy you fuck, having stuck his dick up another man's shithouse the night before... Not only have you contracted an infection from his gay lovers shit particles, but he's also given you AIDS...

      I despise all forms of sexual perversion (no I'm not a worshipper of any Abrahamic religion), but at least faggots keep to their own kind. These so called bis are even more degenerate.

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    • @FreshOutaIdeas Well I am bisexual and I had sex with both girls and guys. None had no diseases

    • That doesn't surprise me... I mean... People these days can't even work out whether they're boys or girls... Or fucking attack helicopter lampshades... 😱. Makes me wanna vomit

  • Congrats, now come out and be honest with your family. If they don't accept it that's their issue.

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  • Lesbian and also a Christian

    My church is fine with it. No one should get hate over their sexual orientation

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  • Hello BEAUTIFUL person! You are definitely accepted by me—I am a pansexual (leaning a little more towards women generally)
    I was raised to be Christian, and I am no longer Christian. Not only because of my sexual orientation but because of many other things...
    I can definitely tell you—being gay or bisexual (lgbt+) is NOT a sin. It never was a sin.
    Please, to you and every other Christian out there, READ the Bible—OBJECTIVELY with comprehension and logic.
    You will see for yourself, if you read it accurately, the passages about homosexuality aren’t meant to be read so literally.
    In fact, 100% of the Bible should not be taken literally.
    But anyways, I hope one day you have the courage to come out although you will have to be prepared to face some serious consequences. Sometimes chasing happiness is a lot harder than you’d think.

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  • The best thing that my cousin did was to come out before he did so behaviour was extremely self destructive. ❤💙💚💛💜

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  • Sexy picture. I'm a pre-op trans woman. Panromantic demisexual.

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  • I honestly don't even believe in God. Soooooooooooooooooooo yeah

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  • You should come out and be happy

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  • You can't be Bisexual, and still Christian

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    • Well, depends how you define christian. Few people follow the bible to a t. And most people don't follow it at all, while calling themself christans. Because to them, they just have to belive in god/jesus.

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What Guys Said 56

  • OMG just live your life bro.. quit trying to make your lifestyle a problem for everyone else. I can't stand when people get on their high horse because STRANGERS who mean nothing to them by the way have issues with your lifestyle. The best revenge is a life well lived not a life of fear and anger.

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  • I was in a similar situation like you years ago and felt the same way, however I did not have what seems like overly judgmental parents as it sounds like to you. I am bisexual myself and for a while was insecure about my feelings and knowing that I was "supposed to" be falling for and lusting for just sexy women, but being drawn towards sexy men in he same way.

    You're situation isn't all too different the way you describe any societal issues with bisexual men. Women would get thumbs up and cheers for making out and felt the double standard. I partially came out when I found myself in a similar situation with my first boyfriend years ago and surprisingly most didn't care and were accepting. I just let my attraction to whomever I saw, lead me into who I'd seek out a relationship with which was scary. Though people thought I was GAY for a while and couldn't really explain to people that I was bisexual, which did cause a couple girls to reject an opportunity at dating me, though beyond that I have not received any major criticism over what my orientation is today. You sound like a wonderful person and respect what you are saying!

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  • This is a good myTake because it has great intentions. You want to let others know they're not alone. You are also trying to take on the identity of those who have inspired you, and be a person who inspires others.
    That's fantastic.

    I would offer this advice, but only if you'd want it. I know you didn't ask for it.

    You have a choice. I suggest you make one.

    First, most obvious. Come out to them. You probably have a good idea of their reaction. Anticipate it.

    Remove yourself from the Church and Community. Cut your family out of your life completely.
    If you think they can't either support you, or be quiet about it, cut them out before you come out. You're going to have to anyways.

    You can save yourself a lot of heartache with the latter. If you choose to remove them from your life, you're taking control. You're liberating yourself from an environment that's toxic before that toxicity occurs. You save yourself a lot of bad feelings this way.

    Then, work on coming out and being comfortable with yourself. You don't need toxicity while you share your identity with others, especially one that you take pride in and clearly defines a portion of your life.

    It's difficult to remove your family from your life. But if they cannot just accept it and be quiet, you were going to have to anyways. If you want that happy life with your significant other, you need to commit to making the environment for the two of you a healthy, happy and supportive one.

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    • If he didn't ask why you talking

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    • I don't like judgmental people it's irrational

    • I feel he would ask if he cared

  • I don't approve of this thread or the picture it upsets me

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  • Stop right there. Mother? So... everything about headship mentioned in 2 Timothy is treated with contempt by your congregation? That's mistake #1.

    "Bisexual" is just a fancy term invented the prop up Kinsey mythology. Medical fact, you weaken your immune system, rather than strengthen it, through same sex lust interaction.

    Your desires can and will lie to you. Re-read Jeremiah. Chapter 17 in particular.

    Love for another man means honoring the vocational destiny of his biology, and not trying to treat it like the opposite of what it is to fancy some exotic, wayward craving.

    And watch out with that LGBTQPIZ political lobby: they're most deceitful of all. They're not your friends. They're cultural Marxists using wayward desire as a battering ram to make sure no one ever gets married the correct way, and never as an act of obedience to God, and never as a means to serve him.

    They want marriage to be for selfish reasons only, to be rare, and to never involve man and woman except to the bare minimum required to sustain a future for civilization. Otherwise never for procreation and always for recreation.

    They want promiscuity and one night stands the norm, and for the government machine to raise children, not parents.

    In groups like Antifa, they are already turning to domestic terrorism. Floyd Corkins was just a warm-up.

    If your church won't tell you these truths to prevent your soul from dying, then the Spirit is not in that church. You're in danger. Find another - before the Satancrats drive the true church underground the way Buddhist extremists in Nepal drove all Nepalese Christendom deep underground.

    My sister is a counselor for troubled kids. Many were molested, and would love to be rid of their same sex intrusive thoughts. The state of Wisconsin by law now forbids her to help them, because the LGBTQPIZ lobby got it's way. They want to drag these kids into their underworld of darkness.

    Treating of SSA makes that harder to do. "Law"makers put kids in danger to appease these evil activists, who now openly demand pedophile acceptance.

    Instead of insisting other diversify their desires, the Spirit can transform your own away from deception-- if you allow him to.

    It'll be like pulling teeth, but it'll be worth it. The Old Adam will resist, and you'll feel it kicking your brain to resist. He deserves to lose, always. You are not yet without hope. Find someone you trust.

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  • Reported. I don’t want to see that on the front page. Take your sins out of my face

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  • firstly I must point out that whatever anyone's orientation is, they should never be ashamed of who they are..
    dont hide from those around you, as they maybe able to support you through what you are experiencing...

    obviously though I cannot comment on what you are going through though as I have never had any feelings of that nature for guys, but have had quite a few friends who were gay/bi etc... and 3 bi gf's and have seen the struggle one of those have with family members, her mother really wouldn't understand, and she believes would react quite badly.. personally I believe she would be ok with everything... people just need to be given a chance in being trusted enough that anyone who is choosing to disclose such personal news about themselves has taken such effort and risk to choose them... you would be surprised at how many would appreciate and respect that...

    but also be aware that you should follow your heart and choose the time when you are ready, sitting down with who you want to tell is the mature way and would be mostly the best way... obviously to some more old fashioned or backward even though who aren't as educated about the subject at hand might need to have some time to mentally digest what you are about to tell them.. so relaying the message to them face to face, but in a clear and adult manner would be your best choice, answer questions as there are always questions in any situation.. put yourself in their shoes for a moment, how would you like to be told if you were in their position

    hope this helps and good luck

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  • My cousin is a Homosexual man who teaches 5th graders in the Catholic school he grew up in.

    If he can manage to teach in a highly religious school while being open about his sexuality. I am pretty sure you can open up without worry.

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    • The reality is though that there aren't many instances of that.

  • I'm a Conservative Presbyterian who has come to believe that homosexuality and bisexuality is a Psychiatric or Physiological issue, probably something where some wires are crossed someplace, that God for some reason meant you to have. You can't help it, so make the most of it, so tell your family. Your family might be upset at first but will eventually forgive you. Jesus already has.

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  • Not listen to the haters

    They might be secretly gay themselves

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  • You're not a real Christian dude if you like the D. Cut off the delusional.

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  • I was brought up Christian and have NO issue with gays or a being bi. I am 100% straight but think we are all born the way we are so it is no bg deal. Enjoy being who you are and be comfortable with your sexual orientation.

    Have you had sex with either gender yet? Do you prefer one over the other for sex?

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  • Don't shoot the messenger but it's been proven in biopsych that the biology of a man who finds men attractive have more estrogen in their body than the typical male. Therefore that is why they like guys more. That's why gay guys and bisexuals can have sex with men because they have a little more female hormones and those hormones is what makes females want to have sex with guys. Therefore proving the psychology of gays and bisexuals.

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    • In other words - they are soy boys and need to man the f up.

    • @DJZest They just need more testosterone in their body. That's the only way they could probably overcome it. You can't just man up, it's hormones in your brain. You can't reverse that mentally. They need to inject themselves with testosterone. That's the only way.

  • I'm born and raised Catholic, and Texan.

    I don't give two sh*ts who people do anything with. It's not my business, and it frankly isn't anybody else's but their own.

    I also don't want to hear about ANYONE's love life regardless of orientation, which brings me to why I support equal rights, but I generally do not support the maniacs who are constantly in other people's face about their orientation- it's no different than heterosexuals who don't shut up about their own conquests.

    Im also pretty confident that the vast majority of people at least in the USA are more or less the same way, and would not, for example, change their voting pattern based solely on the LGBT community.

    Best of luck to you.

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  • Yeah cool I think their are plenty of churches in America that don't bother judging people on sexual preference, they probably have huge congregations too, because most people these days can't really be pigeon wholed anymore.

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  • If you are a Christian, then you might remember that we are told that we are told thatwe are all made in the image and likeness of God. That must somehow apply to all of us, even bisexuals and gay people. God made you this way, and there must be a reason. Therefore, it is not sinful, but just another facet of the Almighty.

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  • You should just keep it to yourself and focus more time on being interested in women. Its only going to make your life worse if you don't. Sure it will feel better for you to indulge in hedonism but in the long term you will regret it. Dont you want to marry a good christian woman? Being actively involved in gay culture and sex will remove that possibility. God clearly states it is a sin. Everyone sins but to clearly and willfully live in sin is not the same thing.

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  • Growing up in the church and being a PK does not make you a Christian. It's not like it's hereditary.
    "No one can see the kingdom of God unless they are born again.” (John 1:3-)
    "Do not conform to the evil desires you had when you lived in ignorance. But just as he who called you is holy, so be holy in all you do." (1 Peter 1:14, 15)

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  • Strange world. Worried about coming out to family but happy to believe fairy stories in a book?

    Good luck to you though.

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  • I'm a guy and I have no problem being friends with bi guys. I think it's great you found yourself a guy! Don't care what people think just be happy and be true to yourself.

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  • I couldn't give a flying fuck but remind me when Jesus told Mankind Man should leave his parents and stick to another man to adopt black babies. You are only deluding yourself. Christian dogma does not tolerate homosexuality, period. Be a Wiccan if you want to be gay but don't mock the name of the Lord by saying he loves your behavior. He doesn't. He said so in the Bible.

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  • If your parents use the excuse of their "Christianity" to disapprove, then they're not very Christ-like. Wrapping their tribal custom (a hatred of people different from themselves) in pseudo theology is completely missing the message of Jesus Himself.

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    • Um, no, it isn't. Disapproval isn't necessarily hate. Maybe you should read that little book again; you know, the Bible. We are told to love one another as Christ loves us. We are not told to accept what God hates and make everyone ok with their homosexual feelings. Hate, for us, should have no place in it. God will do the judging, not us.

    • @Nuuumb You can't have it both ways. If we are going to let God judge, then it is not for us to declare what He "hates", and use that as an excuse to NOT love each other. "How many times must I forgive my brother?" Do you remember what the "little book" says? And even more important, do you recall Matthew 25:41-45? Do you REALLY one to be one of those on his left? "Oh, we hate the sin, even though we don't hate the sinner!" is not enough. You must ACTIVELY support even the stranger, and the prisoner, and the wretched, lest you be one of the goats, and turn from the Lord.

  • ''ABCDEF'' is not MY community. So why would I care what you guys do with each other? Just stop molesting non-ABCDEF's with your (to us) irrelevant opinions and views. I can tolerate you; but I don't want to understand you.

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  • Look, most Christians (or at least Christians like me and the ones i know) won't care about whether you find men attractive or not. The ones you hear about that are homophobic are a vast minority, or at least where i live they are. I think the only sort of problem would be marriage with another man, because in the religion marriage is a Holy Sacrament and is of equal importance to Baptism or Communion, so if two guys got married it is kinda insulting to the Church in that aspect.

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  • So if you're bi and don't want to come out, why don't you just look for a girl you're attracted to and go that route? I mean, you're bi, you can go either way. Wouldn't that be a ton easier than having to "come out" and everything? I mean, ya your current partner (maybe? Or whatever you two are right now..) might be great. But nothing is permanent yet, and surely you could find a girl you could see a future loving as well, right?

    I get if you were only attracted to guys this would be a really big problem– and ya it's still a problem I guess– but if you're attracted to both and don't want to come out, then why don't you just not come out at all, and just find a girl? I mean it's a 50/50 chance compared to guys. Surely you could, right? I'm sorry if this sounds insensitive, but I just don't see how it's that big of a problem for you.

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    • If I fall in love with a guy then I would want to chose that guy.

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    • @Wowgirl10q What?

    • Low i. q
      It's not. Switch

  • I'm bi and not religious, but I sexually repress myself

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  • Just commenting so I don't have to see dudes kissing anymore on suggested content.

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    • AHHAHAAAHAHAHAHAAAHHA

    • @Afrochick I didn't even care at first but after like the 5th time it started to gross me out. I don't even like the image of hetero people kissing.

  • I mean it state in the bible you aren't supposed to be gay so i reccomend. a change. in religion or just dont be bi

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    • It also says you can't eat shellfish, rabbits, pork, or wear cloths of two different materials. So I'd assume you abide by all these?

    • Religion is a choice. Bisexuality is not

  • Almost nobody has given me shit for being bisexual and I'm pretty open about it, lol. People actually find my candor comforting.

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    • Is it because you're masculine bisexual and not feminine? Straight guys are ok with it too?

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    • @aja32924821 Nah, I'll take anyone as a friend so long as I like what's going on inside their mind. Mental > physical.

    • And I kind of have a "squeaker" voice too, so wow, guess this shit is more genetic than I thought ahaha.

  • Not listen to the snowflakes. They get offended over everything

    Nothing wrong with being bisexual like there is nothing wrong with being straight

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