The main thing with her book that I get is that she is suggesting men will not respect you unless you demand it from them or unless you trick them into being nice to you through the fear of losing you or by manipulation.
I would not want a guy who is only nice if I force him to be nice cause what if one day I’m old or sick or disabled or blind and can’t force respect out of him? Is he going to leave because he’s not threatened by the odds of losing me either financially or socially?
I have not dated too many people but it’s important I get a guy who can hold himself accountable and does not need me to stand over him with a hawk like gaze for him to be kind and decent with me.
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Agreed. Loyalty and respect should not be demanded. How does that make anyone want to stay? If it's commanded of me then I feel like a slave. Loyalty and respect should be expected without demanding. And if you don't receive it, that person has a problem. To demand it is just pure manipulation. And when you manipulate somebody, that's no longer a relationship.