Why do some girls hide that they're seeing other guys?

[Anonymous]

I went out with this chick 5 times. I asked her at the start if she's seeing anyone and she denied it. After 2 outings, I asked her on a proper date. She said she just wanted to be friends and isn't looking for anyone right now. So we went out as friends another 3 times. I found out from a mutual acquaintance that she was sleeping with another guy all this time (4 months) and they recently broke up. I broke off my friendship with this girl, as I hate liars.
Same story with 3 other girls.

Why do they do this? Why not just be honest? If they want to be friends with a guy, why is it wrong for them to just say they're seeing someone?

It's frustrating and a waste of time, and makes me despise the girl in the end.

[Anonymous]

People don't say what's actually happening because they're afraid to. If you asked a girl if she was seeing someone and she said well I occasionally hook up with this one guy but he's a jerk and I only go to him because I get lonely and just really want a night with someone would you stay? If a girl said well I really like this one guy but he doesn't seem that interested so I'm trying other people in hopes that I get over him but I'm still talking to him just in case he changes his mind would you stay? If a girl says well I have a really good friend that really likes me and I like having him around but I really don't want to date him would you stay? If a girl says I'm really unsure of what I want so I'm just going out with any and every guy that asks would you stay? If a girl says I'm still really attached to my ex and will probably go running back to him as soon as he gives me another chance would you stay? If a girl says I met this one guy out of town who seems really interesting but rarely shows up but I'm not in an actual relationship with him would you stay? Probably not. Most guys wouldn't. So that's why we use vague terms like dating and seeing and talking to. It's twisted but it's life. No girl is going to outright say what the situation is because she doesn't want you to know and she may not even know herself. They're scared. They aren't deceiving you out of spite or to play you. We all want love or companionship or sex or something I don't know, but whatever it is it's a tricky thing. If she tells you she risks having you leave if she doesn't and you find out you leave. If she solely focuses on you and ignores every other guy trying to get her attention she risks missing out on someone she might've really enjoyed a relationship with. These girls aren't doing these things to hurt you they're just confused and unsure. Just like all of us. I'm not saying it's okay I'm just saying it's reality. You either accept it or live in angry denial your choice.

[brocklee]

There is a huge difference between dating and being in a relationship. Dating is the process of finding good relationship material. It takes time and should not be rushed. There are also freedoms both parties have not being committed. I always assume during the dating phase there are other candidates. It isn't my business, so I don't ask.

When the step is taken to be in a committed relationship, that is when things change and this behavior is not acceptable. That is why it is such a big step and should never be taken lightly.

[MintyDuck]

That's really wrong tbh../: it sounds like she was keeping her options open to see if she could do any better and if not would come back to you. Don't really see why you can't just be honest about that but I'm a loner anyway so not know how these things work haha

[Betwyn]

I totally get seeing more then one person..

I was seeing 2 and talking to a third..

Now one of the 2 is gone, the other is on thin ice and I'm talking to 2..

But.. I don't lie about it. If they ask, like you did, I tell them.

[zombiebabe]

they hide it because they are ashamed of what they are doing...personally i'm against such type of people..i've known someone like that before...a total waste of time

[looneymalooney]

ashamed? Hard to believe that. If they were ashamed, they would act decent. It's because they players. Girl players !
They are young and living the life. For some girls, this means sleeping with as many dudes as possible.

[zombiebabe]

this kind of lifestyle sucks

[bellegirl16]

Because they are keeping their options open. Sneaky wenches...that's terrible!

[BatDoc]

Because humans are wicked creatures. Not all of them, but a lot of them.

If someone was taking you out and showing you attention, most people ride that train until they have to stop it.

Some men do this, but it's mostly women because men are dumb enough to keep taking women out thinking there is a chance to date them. Some women take advantage of that. Actually, a lot of women do. That's why I never buy women drinks. You're throwing your money away.

[Anonymous]

They do it because they want to keep their options open and you're just another option. In other words have their cake and eat it. Keeping a guy on the line assures them if all else fails she'll just default back to him. I'm with you I'd be like see ya!

[Asker]

Sounds about right. But why can't they just say they're seeing someone, and if they stop seeing them and considered you as an option, why not then try and express interest in us? Honesty is so much better than deceit.

[Opinion Owner]

Because they are selfish only thinking of them selves. In the end they could care less once a guy finds out because they don't care and they believe guys are incapable of having feelings.

[Distant]

One thing you need to know about most girls: The LOVE attention. I watched a girl flirt with my friend for months, go on dates with him, etc. I seriously thought they were going to become a couple until she leaned over, kissed me during her parent's anniversary party and invited me up to her bedroom.

[looneymalooney]

aaaand? What did you do?

[Distant]

What do you think I did? Kissed her back and went up to her room!

[Distant]

Also, I meant "they" in my original opinion.

[looneymalooney]

And what happened with the "friend". Did she continue to date him or did you two became a couple after this?

[Distant]

Neither.

[skippertod1]

this never happened by the way

[Distant]

LMAO. Believe what you want. Every word of it is 100% true. Even if your sad little mind doesn't think so.

[kangaru2]

people these days dont really take relationships seriously...

[skippertod1]

You are her backup. maybe you are going after girls out of your league. also all girls do this all the time try and have numerous back up guys set up. but if i guy cheats they throw a massive tantrum.

[rogue_alpha]

Having multiple partners makes a woman feel in control. Women are insecure. They always have to feel in control. Almost anything a woman does can be traced back to their insecurity.

[Jammypeony]

As BelleGirl16 said, keeping options open. And I know many many men who do the same thing. Infact, it's happened to me before with a guy.

[ThreeIn]

That's odd. Maybe she wanted to fuck you too but wasn't sure if she would so she didn't tell you about the other dude to keep the option open.

[Anonymous]

Because they're on the lookout for someone better