Almost never. I get stares and flirting but thats usually it. To be fair, I get nervous myself and run away. there's a guy who seems to single me out in groups right now and I feel like there's a strong chance he likes me. He suggested that we go get some of my favorite food I mentioned one day, before I leave. Thats on top of all the staring and focusing on me in a group. He's also a doctor, so of course my shallow mom is like "get him!" lol
A few months ago, there was this guy who got really flirty and touchy feely with me. Even friends in our group would say he was focusing on me a lot or making really random moves to be near me and touch me when I was around. But he never asked me out. I was living in a different country and leaving soon, so I guess nothing would have come from it anyway, but I got the vibes that he really liked me and so did my friends. However, my best friend also said I pushed him away with my body language. there's that "running away" thing again.
So I'm guessing these are my clues or hints that someone may like me - focusing on me in a group and being more touchy than other guys. Its sometimes hard for me to know when its just friend touching or more than friends though. Like one other guy would hug me and put his arm around me and we were super comfortable, but I thought he only liked me as a friend. I'm also really touchy feely, not with most guys, but in general. It doesn't always mean I like someone.
In certain environments, I get a lot of attention, but I think my weight has to do with the limits in others. I'm a fattie so I think that affects how open guys are even if they are attracted to me. I've been asked out like 3 or 4 times. I'm 24. Crazy.
In the past 12 months, I've been asked by guys to spend time with them outside of normal settings 3 times.
But none of them were straight asking out, or professing of feelings. So I don't know if that makes it zero.
The three circumstances were a work friend who invited me to accompany him multiple times to his friend's house parties, which I did not attend, as I suspected it was just an opportunity to hook up, or he just wanted to get drunk/high with me, both of which I don't do.
The second time was a male friend who invited me in a Facebook message to have coffee with him. I don't know if it was intended to be a date or not. I didn't go to that either, as I actually didn't check Facebook in time, and he didn't ask me again after that. I didn't feel like I knew him very well.
The third, was a guy I know who is in a relationship, he keeps sending messages to me all the time, and keeps asking me to meet up with him. I never have, and never plan to. I would never do that, and I tell him that he needs to respect his relationship and present girlfriend. I don't think he's a particularly faithful guy, unfortunately.
Actually, there is a 4th, too, a guy I've known for a decade, who also continually messages me on Facebook, asking me how I am, and if I want to "hang out", however I never respond, as he sexually assaulted me when I was 19, and he was 29.
I haven't taken any if these men up on their offers.
I'd really like to have a man get to know me slowly, and ask me out in person, and be clear about his intentions.
However that doesn't seem to exist anymore...
Honestly, I think guys are losing there balls.
I, and a lot of other chicks I know have noticed.
They're immature! Like, a guy will honk his horn at my friends and I or they'll walk right past us and wait until they're farther off to say someone like little children. It makes me want to punch them in the face. If you could walk up to me and say that instead of running away and saying it, props! But, really? It's not attractive.
Or a guy will stare at you or even smile at you but won't say a thing and we chicks are just sitting here wondering why. Be a man and make the first move. It's not that we can't (Well most) It's that we don't want to and we're not going to. I want nothing to do with a guy who doesn't have the balls to walk up to me and flirt/talk no matter how cute he is, which is why I'll refuse to walk up to them.
Unless I'VE been looking at said guy and want to make the first move and at that point he most likely hasn't noticed me yet or hasn't been looking at me, thats okay! Thats different. THEN it's my job.
If you're showing signs of interest and won't walk up and talk or are waiting for me to, then you've lost your chance.
Like never, considering that only one guy thus far has actually asked me out.
So many beautiful woman replying with like answers, and looking at the results and reading the comments of everyone sharing... I am surprised!! Being an older person on this site compared to most, I have experience the opposite when talking to woman closer to my age, which got me thinking why this is? When I was in my early 20's I never had a problem asking woman out. Which is probably why I had such great success with woman (Attractive woman) ... because... No-one else was asking them out!! I would love to hear from woman closer to my age on this site, as for the woman I know would say the opposite of what most of the woman here are saying... So this is what/why I think that is. Young men are scared of rejection or think a woman is out of their league so they don't ask. Older men have found their self confidence, understand woman more and aren't worried so much about rejection anymore. Thinking back when I was younger, I never had other guys hitting on any of my girlfriends, flirt yes, but never ask them out. But now that I'm older, it feels like I have every Tom, Dick and Harry hitting on whomever I'm with, even if the guy knows they are taken.
Side note to all the woman here: wait a few years and you'll be singing a different tune. Lol
And side note to the guys... this is your time to shine... don't be shy. Find your dream girl.
It's kind of funny how many of the responses included something along the lines of "ZERO. GUYS, GRAB YOUR SACK AND GET TO IT." I have to wonder how many of these girls actually give off approachable social cues. Headphones in? Probably not happening. Shuffling about on your phone? Unlikely. Not making eye contact with a guy (or looking away with no smile)? Most won't bite. I've seen a number of really cute girls, but they all make it quite obvious that they don't want to be bothered (or equally likely, just not bothered by me).
Second, I wonder how many girls who have "never been asked" play hard-to-get? Not giving him a phone number? Not answering should he call? Never calling/texting first? How many have been approached by a guy only to play coy? Despite what Seventeen and Cosmopolitan suggest, "the chase" is two ways. If a guy tries to get to know you better, and you're making it an uphill battle to get a positive response from you, then he's going to lose interest REALLY fast.
Third, it's no secret that for every guy these girls want to "sack up, give me attention, and ask me out," there's at least nine other guys in the same room that they're trying their hardest to appear unapproachable to. As has been stated, for some women, they don't even factor unattractive guys into their number of asks.
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Women reject more casually these days because they don't need men like they used to. They still expect (on average) for men to play by the same rules as if they did need men though. Most women can't even handle some jerk calling them fat without crying and yo-yo dieting, yet men too are made of flesh and blood. Try living your whole life only ever being asked out once or twice and being rejected immediately most of the time and then mostly rejected soon after innitial acceptance. Imagine trying to pull yourself up emotionally from a lifetime of that to have the 'balls' as you put it, to ask out another probable rejector.
Don't you think that after long enough the loneliness would either turn you bitter so that you'd treat women as sex objects, or make you hopeless so that you give up trying?
Of course if men have feelings the usual response from women is that they should 'man up' or 'stop feeling sorry for themselves'. Men aren't in touch with their feelings because when they try, they get hurt. It's not okay for a man to cry.
I don't generally ask women out because of few reasons
1. almost every girl I've asked out has rejected me because they were into one of my friends
2. the ones that have said yes (with one exception) have admitted they only said yes to get closer to my friends.
3. the relationships i have been in (3 serious relationships, 2 casual relationship) were all sooo... idk, clingy? like i couldnt just have my own day, whenever i had free time I HAD to spend it with them. sooo yeah lol.
4. The one relationship where I was engaged, she ended up cheating on me with one of my friends and got an abortion. that one really did take a lot out of me
now if I see an attractive girl or meet an awesome or fun one and I have a friend that finds her attractive, I'll just encourage my friends to ask them out. my friends have never been rejected from these women I've found attractive that i encouraged them to ask out.
so now i just mostly work on myself, and trust my happiness as my guide. for the most part im fine being by myself, its quiet and i dont really have to do anything i dont want to, but parts of me do wonder what it would be like to have a serious and meaningful relationship where she was just your down to earth gal that wasn't a complete bitch.
i don't know lol. I don't think im fugly or anything, i just think my friends are just more attractive than me in women's eyes. which i dont have a problem with, im not bitter towards women as a whole, i just dont generally trust them with my heart/feelings anymore.
lol at the guys saying wow i better go ask out some girls now!
take these results with a pinch of salt. i get the feeling a lot of people on gag aren't very social. even as a girl if you dont actually go out and meet a steady stream of new guys, you're not gonna get asked out. every reasonably social girl i know gets asked out at least once a month.
not only that. girls have a habit of blanking out guys from their minds that they dont find attractive. i have this conversation quite a lot with girls i know.
"i wish i got asked out more"
"you got asked out last week"
"oh yeah... he doesn't count though. i didn't really find him attractive"
I've been asked out about 10 times, and I'm 19, and I think it has little with how you look (I'm average and to a lot of people below that lol), more about how many people know you and how many people you're 'exposed' to. Personally I think I get asked out a little more often than average because I talk to a lot of people. I do my best to get to know people simply to know them, like I talk to friends of friends if I don't know them, I talk to people I'm waiting in line with, people I sit next to in class etc I used to be really shy but I decided to talk to at least one new person per day for a month and it helped me immensely and I made a lot of friends. But the bad side to that is it feels like the guys I do like never ask me out because they're intimidated by the number of people I know if they like me a bit too, like they feel like the competition is too tight for them to try or something. Either way if you're a guy and you like someone just be nice tell her she looks pretty if she seems happy to hear that ask her out. If she says no at least you know and can spend time finding someone who knows your worth, go cold turkey and don't bother her again. Do your best to be confident no matter what, because at the end of the day the worth of a man or woman goes far beyond their dating success :)
I think when girls say they don't get asked out. It means they don't get asked out by guys they want. Guys that they don't want to go on a date with don't count.
Yea, if anything I rather them just ask me out instead of always wanting my number and barely texting back. Like I want sumn like on tv. We have coffee shops on campus. Just ask me if I wanna go get a cup of coffee or sumn so we can get to know each other. If everything goes well, then I'll feel more comfortable about giving my number or something. Who knows? If it goes well enough, a second date could happen on campus, perhaps a picnic at the lake. But yea, I get asked out maybe once every couple of months. Other than that, every other day you hear "Aye girl lemme get yo number" like "boy boom, ion know you like that, prob just another horny stalker or sumn" SMDH.
my current boyfriend confessed his feelings to me and i told him how i felt and he asked me out and i said yes. there's is one boy who won't leave me alone, saying im amazing and blah blah... obviously its nice of him but im taken and he only wants sex... there's this other boy who will act like a complete jerk to me but say he fancys me and says he so jealous of my boyfriend. there's this other boy, who keeps asking me out, untill i got with my boyfriend. and then there's this boy who asked out like so many people.. including me.. he was desperate.. and yeah so onn. It depends really. depends on how the boy is. and what he really wants. I've just came across some up front boys in my time haha.
ladies you have to remember, guys express their feelings in a very non specific manner. Just the opposite as you specific expressing females. Guys do not feel the need to go so deep to express how they feel. If your man says "know what I mean" he just expressed his feelings just prior to those words. You just missed it. We also express lots of things within little questions, like, why do you have to do that? or little comments with either a negative or positive tone, followed by a half laugh, or a whatever, a small smile as he nodes his head and says "totally" . These are all different expressions of our feelings. The why do you have to do that means, we are uncomfortable with that. The smile and the totally is approval or a yes or our expression of a mutual understanding. Try to clue in on the negative and positive tones prior to our facial expressions. Guys actually express volumes!
Depends on the scene.
I get hit on at work, but not asked out.
If I'm out in the town doing shopping or something, I sometimes get the odd fella walking up.
And obviously when I'm in a pub or night club, it's non stop.
But considering that I don't go partying, it's quite rare. I tend to ask guy's out myself, because I'm into the nerdy types abd they tend to be too shy to make the first move.
Don't have to worry about that now, though, since I've been in a relationship for a couple of years.
I am genuinely shocked by all the answers by females. Holy shit... and here guys are told that a woman always has options etc. and if you don't move fast you'll be forgotten and she'll go on to the next option because why bother waiting for you - hence the whole PUA culture exists about how you need to ask her out almost immediately, make moves almost immediately, etc.
... and still shocked. Going to have to get a drink now just to handle this information.
I don't ask girls out for a few reasons. Just reading some of the responses, you can probably see why. It is usually awkward, which makes the anxiety in me worse. Plus, many girls will completely make fun of guys that ask them out, especially ugly guys. Or they will get offended for some reason. Too many risks imo.
I've been asked out once in my lifetime, and in a fashion so comedic I couldn't take the guy seriously.
Random guy on the train station: Ummmm... hi... um... What's your name?
Me: Slava, do I know you?
R: Ummm... no...
M: OK then *browsing the net on my phone*
R: Ummm... are you drunk?
M: Nope.
R: So... ummm... Wanna go grab a beer with me, then?
It took all the willpower I had in me not snort right back at him.
umm... once in a blue moon. they were all very nice guys, those who asked. i'd say maybe a total of little over ten guys? but just wasn't ready to date ever. i have very overbearing parents who locked me up all my life, so i never went out... also, i'm not that flirty and am shy... i see girls who give flirty looks to guys and that's how they reel'em in. :)
i'm working on myself right now. hopefully when i'm done, i'll be able to say that i've met more guys, been asked out more, and eventually have a steady relationship. i didn't realize guys were so shy. maybe i'll ask out a nice boy someday.
Before I dare ask a girl out, I usually wait until I see indicators that show she digs me.
-If she frequently gets my attention by saying, "Hi ______ hows it going?" before I even notice her, then I'll be more likely to ask her out.
-If she smiles in my presence and gives me inviting looks, I'm more likely to ask her out.
-If she has open body language, listens, and remembers what I say, I'm more likely to ask her out.
Otherwise without these cues, the risk is too great to be rejected.
As a guy I think we assume that these girls are so great they must be taken already or think they are not interested. Seeing the comments of some beautiful girls here. I'm shocked that no one has asked them out. If it wasn't in a different state I would ask them out myself. Time to start asking guys girls are waiting for us damn why did i not know this like 10 years ago.
If you want a guy to ask you out, when we look at you gives us a sign of some-sort, a smile, a wink, something to work with. Don't just look away, or if you do smile when doing so. Throw a dog a bone.
Almost never. I'm a bit of a homebody, straight to university then back home again. On the rare occasions that I do go out, guys never approach me directly; they always seem to get my friends to ask me out for them. Maybe I look like a bitch? I dunno.
Guys just never ask me out, i guess I'm not very attractive? But to give since insight i have hormonal adult acne, my weight has fluctuated and I'm only now working to get it under control. I've also struggled with a back&forth resentment towards men. I'm also quite a busy bee.. I've started focusing all my efforts towards my career bc it's the one thing I've got going, and also my hobbies :) its actually quite fulfilling altho there is always annoying societal pressure that in order to be a 'fulfilled' woman I should be in a relationship.. idk. I could be a whisk and that's why guys don't ask me out.
I've been asked out twice in my entire life, both times early in school. I've never been asked out since but i get plenty of harassment and rude comments about sex and bjs in the street. guys are more vocal on Facebook in real life but the only things theyve asked me are for fuck buddy arrangements or theyll ask me to go on one really shitty short date and then talk about going to a hotel right after and being fuck buddies after that so i dont respond. the decent guys dont seem to bother asking girls, my friends and i have asked out all our boyfriends
Like never and it's disappointing and makes us feel bad at times all because he's scared or shy... we like it if guys flatter us... But almost never will guys do it anymore
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