Do guys like being the chased or being the chaser?

1) Do guys like the girl to text first?
2) does it seem clingy if the girl responds to a text (the guy does not respond to this text), then later says good night (guy does not respond to this one either), then texts the guy again in the morning just say good morning?
3) do guys like chasing after girls?
4) if I want to remain a virgin until I'm married, does this give the guy something to work for? In other words, if im not giving him everything before marriage, will this make him want to commit even more so?
5) will he see no reason to commit if I give him vaginal sex, head, and other sexual things before marriage?

Let me clarify what I mean by chase: texting first, initiating contact. But of the girl gladly responds and she is clearly into you and you've both told each other this. So she isn't playing hard to get or anything. You're just simply going after her.


Most Helpful Guy

  • 1. Yes
    2. Maybe, maybe not. It shows interest and that you're thinking about us, it takes a bunch of things before a girl is too clingy.
    3. No, just no. Please discard this whole notion of chased and chaser.
    4. Work for? This is offensive. First you're treating men like sex obsessed animals, we're not dogs looking for a reward for being a good boy with sex being the reward. Second, if anything it makes me want to commit less because you're holding back a part of yourself. And by your logic, what's to stop him getting a divorce after having sex with you if that was really what he was working for the whole time? Nothing.
    5. This is just too offensive, I can't even process this... wouldn't you want sex from someone you like too? Why are you acting like only males like sex?

    I don't even...

    • I'm sorry!!! I meant no offense!!! I'm so sorry... I only asked this because my stepmother told me before that if you give a guy everything before a real commitment then he won't want to commit. I Didn't mean to offend anyone >.< I'm sorry for doing so!

    • Show All
    • Haha okay (: Yeah she's pretty crazy, that's why I wondered about that. Thank you for your answer

    • No problem. Any time. :)

Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 10

  • 1) Sure, it's a nice change.
    2) I don't like morning texts, the rest is fine.
    3) Chasing as in sending them a message asking how they are or telling them something fun? Yes. Repeatedly bashing our heads against a wall only to be ignored because they think playing hard to get is a good idea? No.
    4) No, it gives me a great reason to delete your number from my phone, ignore any further texts and go out for a drink.
    5) I would see it as signs of genuine interest, it would make me feel sexy and desired, and it would also help work out if a commitment would even work (because if the sex is going to be bad, forget it)

    Please bear in mind the age difference.

    • Okay :-) thank you for these answers! I really greatly appreciate it!

  • I rather chase so that I can do all the moves on my own accord. when girls chase me I really don't do anything.

  • 1. Yes
    2. Not really, depends on how the guy takes it really. I personally would love it.
    3. I don't.
    4. I don't plan on waiting for marriage. In fact I don't plan on getting married at all. So if that's what a woman wants then I'll just move on. To me, a sexual experience is an important part of connecting deeply.
    5. If you two connect on a deep level in all other aspects, as well as connect in sexual contact, then he'll naturally be more inclined to stay committed.

    • Okay :-) thank you so much for this honest opinion!

  • 1. Don't give a fuck who texts first.
    2. If the bitch wants me she can text whatever shit she wants whenever she wants.
    3. Do penguins like chasing after killer whales? Fuck no.
    4. Fuck. No. Ain't nobody working for your "poon". It's not some goddamn quest.
    5. If that is the basis of your commitment you chose poorly to begin with.

    • Lol I like your answers. As for the last one, it's not the basis for me, it was more of a question I was curious about :-) thank you for your answers.

  • Much rather prefer being chased for a change

  • 1) Sure.
    2) not really.
    3) some do, some don't. In my opinion that chasing thingy is stupid as fuck though.
    4) not really.
    5) sex not related to commitment..

    • Okay :-) well my stepmother told me that if you're having sex with him, he's not gonna see any reason to really get married if you're already acting as a wife to him. so that's why I asked the last one.

  • Being chased would be something new. But I perfer to chase, pursue.

  • I think yes we like forward women who call Or text first or ask us out on a date I do it is just not that common and I wish it was but it seems to be the man's job

    • yeah because a lot of us women are traditional like that. I have never take pleasure in seeking out the guy but this one, I love messaging first :-) I love seeing messags from him first as well but he hasn't messaged me first lately. I am thinking he got used to me messaging him first lol which is cool :) Should I ask him if he likes me messaging first?

    • I dont know you can chase someone only so long they have to be wanted to be cought and if that person likes the other person they will texted first sometimes if they truly like you ists easy to go from chaser to stalker

  • nothing among those 2, i will protect my single life till my last breat :-P

    • Lol you don't want to have a girlfriend? Are you like a player or something?

    • i'm a prostitutes' fanboy

    • Oh. Lovely

  • I don't like chasing or being chased. To me it causes unnecessary issues.


What Girls Said 2

  • I think most people enjoy a little bit of both, honestly. Chasing someone can be a fun challenge I suppose, but if they don't seem to want to chase you back, then it could be interpreted as them not being interested in you. And that would be boring, of course. If they chase you back, you get that kind of validation from them, you know. So many girls are really afraid of showing interest in guys, which makes it REALLY hard for the guys to figure out if the girls are interested or not. So, basically,
    1) yes. It lets them know that she actually does want to talk to them, and that she isn't replying to their texts out of politeness. But try not to text first every single time.
    2) Yes, in my opinion that would be kinda clingy. Sending 2 texts in a row at different times of the day/evening is ok, but after that it seems kind of desperate. Let him respond to your texts before you send more.
    3) Some do because they like the challenge, some don't because they think it's tedious/unnecessary.
    4) Not really. If the guy really wants to have sex before marriage, he's definitely going to move on to someone who's on the same level as him. If the guy also wants to wait until marriage, it won't really make a difference either way.
    5) That depends on the guy (and where you live/what your culture is like). But, considering that lots of people have sex before marriage without having any commitment issues, I don't think having sex before marriage would be that big of a problem.

  • they like being the chaser even if they dont know/show it at first
    they just say no because they want girls to go after them to make it easier for them (And when that happens they get bored and will eventually find another girl that catches their eye but won't give them a chance and they will chase her and start losing interest in their girl)

    not all of them obviously but a lot/majority

    • Okay :-) thank you!

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    • fair enough :D lol @StickStickity13

    • I just updated the question to clarify for everyone what I mean by "chase"

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