My first kiss wasn't that great. What do I do?

[Anonymous]

Hey guys so I just had my first kiss like 15 minutes ago. And basic line it wasn't that great. I mean I didn't expect it to be perfect... well that's a lie im a girl I dream about it. Anyways this guy I like and I were in my car cuddling un the back. He had the lines perfect and executed the pre kiss awesomely. The actual kiss was sloppy and like I kinda froze and then was like how do I do this? Then I just kinda started moving my lips and sucking and weird moving. Like were weren't in sync at all. And I laughed because it was awkward and bad during the kiss so he smiled and laughed and stopped then went inside to go to bed. Were pretty comfortable with each other and are basically dating just haven't called it that. So I was gonna comment right after that "that was bad" but laugh so it was more sincere. But he also can take things bad sometimes so I felt I shouldn't. I feel bad though because I'm inexperienced and he is plenty experienced, so he's probably in bed just thinking, "wow she sucks at kissing and that was horrible", so I'm just freaking out about it. Honestly the kiss may have been less bad then im saying because im all hyped up now and pumped because it was my first kiss so i didn't know what to expect/know what it would feel like. Plus I had just ate Chinese food and didn't feel good. Yumm... But what should I do? Should I tell him that was my first kiss so sorry if it sucked, should I just continue for our next kisses and then learn as we go?(which I feel bad because he has to suffer through teaching me). Should I tell him to practice with me? What do I do?

Updates

+1 y

Is it bad that we haven't kissed since I posted this?

[Azukuban]

Kissing isn't a science, it's more of an art form in that everyone has a different style and preference. What might be good to one person will be terrible to someone else. But there usually is a general accepted idea when it comes to kissing: It doesn't matter how the kiss was if it was with the person you really like. You like this guy and he clearly likes you, so focusing on kissing him as a victory, don't muddle the lines of good and great. Everyone's first kiss is a little strange. I remember mine, I was 17 and the reason I waited so long is I had braces on since I was 15. I didn't want my first kiss to be in braces. I actually met a really pretty girl at a dance when I was visiting family across the country. I asked her if we could kiss and she agreed so we did. I still remember how it was and I honestly can tell you I've come a long way. Kissing is merely another way to express your affection for someone and a great way to connect to people. Not all kisses have to be meant for that super passion. My grandmother is Russian and always kissed us on the mouth. While all my cousins and Aunts kissed me on my cheeks. Kissing is connecting and when it comes to people you love, it's not how you kiss, it's the fact that you did and you know they care about you. The same is true with this guy and don't worry, you've got a long way to improve, because kissing, like all skills, are not meant to be mastered on the first try or it would be very boring indeed. I'm 29 now and I still feel that strange sensation when kissing a girl, because between me and her, it is Our first time. As for what you need to do, just act normal. If the opportunity comes again, you guys should kiss again and if he asks, tell him the truth, that you liked kissing him.

[Asker]

This comment was actually really great! It made me feel so much better! I love the way you explained it. Reading this it gave me slight butterfly's in my stomach and a smile :) like it was almost poetic! Thank you a ton this really calmed my nerves.

[Echo_40]

My first kiss was just absolutely awful (I kind missed her lips... Yeah it was that bad) but then we tried again and it was better. By the 4th kiss I wasn't that bad. After me and that girl broke up and I got another girlfriend our first kiss wasn't bad at all but it could've been better and we kissed again literally seconds after the first kiss and it was better. Those are the only two girls that I've kissed so I remember very vividly what its like to not have had my first kiss yet. It gets better exponentially. Ideally kiss a lot on one occasion so you can learn faster. And definitely tell him that it was your first kiss.

[Asker]

Alright I will! And honestly I think are lips kinda missed I the beginning and random times. Its kinda becoming a blur.

[Drooogie4]

First kisses are usually bad.
Even just a first with someone new. You aren't going to be in sync right away usually.

Plus, I think everyone builds it up way too high in their heads before hand.
Its just a kiss.
The more practice and passion, the better itll get:)

[Asker]

Yeah i defiantly built it up! I'm glad its not just me.

[talkativetamzy]

Aw! I'm so sorry you feel your first kiss was horrible. If he knows you're inexperienced, he'd understand and would be willing to 'train' you. And honestly, you'll get the hang of it the more you kiss. Kinda like math.

[Asker]

Alright! And thanks for the sympathy!

[MissMc3]

Just relax, it probably wasn't as big a deal to him as it was to you. You can jokingly say that you're sorry that sucked, that's fine. And trust me, it won't take tons of kisses for you to get the hang of it xD

[Asker]

That's good news! :) and that's a good way to bring it up!

[AllThatSweetJazz]

The trouble is you romanticise these things. It's a FIRST kiss. The first of anything is rarely amazing and let alone the best. You shouldn't over-romanticise your first kiss or first time having sex, instead focus on working toward your best kiss or best times having sex. There's no reason why these first times would be any different from every other firsts ever, like riding a bike; you're shit at first but you get better. The better you get, the better the ride becomes.

[Asker]

Good analogy. Does put things in a more clear perspective!

[AllThatSweetJazz]

Thanks, glad I could help. (^_^ )

[Mesonfielde]

Just have another one later without the Chinese food and you'll be all fine and dandy.

[LightsOff]

You're thinking about this way too much. It's just a kiss. Do whatever you feel like doing.

[muspelhem_5]

Focus on your breathing. This should calm you down, leaving you free to actually ENJOY the experience, rather than worrying about technique. And the key is in the enjoyment.

[Asker]

Okay ill have to try that next time. I was so nervous and inexperienced that I just tried to move my lips and stuff. It was strange...

[muspelhem_5]

I was like that too once. Now I don't even think about it, I just do it.

Anyway, kissing is sexual, and the more times you have sex with the same person, the better coordinated you'll become, and the better it will get. That is my experience.

[Asker]

Makes sense!

[MJas16]

A first kiss is most likely going to be bad... you guys are not used to kissing and well it's your first so it's all new to you.. don't let it stop you from dating him

[Asker]

Alright. didn't plan on stopping just nervous about how to fix it.

[MJas16]

You guys both know it was awkward but it's good that you two laughed about it... there's nothing to fix really just focus on kissing better? It all takes practice

[Asker]

Yeah. I just feel bad because I'm the one who probably sucked. He's kissed people before.

[MJas16]

He went through his friend kissed before and I bet he was bad at it too... or you never know. maybe he was the bad kisser but dont think about it too much haah I know it's hard not to but I bet there will be better kisses in the future. 😊

[Asker]

I just wish I could see what I was doing! I feel like that would be helpful. Creepy but helpful.

[littletea]

trust me, first kisses are always bad, at least compared to later on. hopefully he'll understand!

[Asker]

I hope so too!

[Anonymous]

If he sincerely likes you then it won't bother him much. First kisses are always awkward, but if it really bothers you then you could either ask him for tips/pointers or try online? You're not the only to have gone through that. Haha, good luck and relax a bit!

[Asker]

The tips didn't really help, but I also was nervous as hell. But how would I start that conversation? Just like "yeah that kiss yesterday... it sucked. What's your advice?" :P haha not really but I don't know how to start that conversation.

[Opinion Owner]

It's going to be awkward anyway. When I had mine I decided just to stick it out there and take the repercussions as and when they came. However you could start by asking him on his opinion or even begin with bringing up the topic of kissing and techniques or whatever. Hahaha, I'm naturally an awkward person so I've learned to just get it over with and dive head in. It doesn't work for everyone, but y'know... I try to give advice where advice will be taken.

[Asker]

Makes sense. I'm an awkward person too. And being in an older relationship (last one was basically middle school) I'm learning that things will be awkward but I just gotta get them out of the way. Its hard though! Like I said still trying.

[Opinion Owner]

It gets easier. First time for anything is always a bit rough. You can't just look at a piano and suddenly know how to play like Beethoven. 😂

[Asker]

So true!

[sexyphil]

Practice makes perfect. You will get better at it

[Asker]

Good!

[sexyphil]

we can't expect to be perfect first time out. My tip is don't use too much tongue or it gets messy. You're not trying to lick his tonsils just enough to tingle his lips and touch tongues and dot put any suction on... lol You'll get it with a bit of practice

[Asker]

Yeah that's understandable. And we didn't use tounge because it was the first.

[Anonymous]

So girls lie about perfect kisses? And in fact will break up with men if there first kiss is terrible?

[Opinion Owner]

You have a car and you're under 18. Wow, yikes

[Asker]

I've heard that but doesn't mean that I would. That's a bit shallow in my opinion.

[Asker]

Also I'm 17 will be 18 in the begging of next year and its not like we were having sex. Also it was my first kiss and I'm 17. Some of my friends have had sex since they were in middle school let alone kisses.

[Opinion Owner]

Doesn't make it right

And yeah, it'd be shallow, but, that's just what they do

[Opinion Owner]

Are you trying to keep up with them? Is that why you were kissing?

[Asker]

Not at all! Haha We were just in the back of my car kinda cuddled up and he was talking about a lot of stuff. It was a really deep conversation. And then he just smiled and I asked him "what?" He said "nothing, just thinking" I asked him "about?" And then he said "this" and grabbed me and kissed me. It wasn't a steamy long make out session just a kiss. Societal pressures had nothing to do with it. It was just a feel of the moment kind of thing. We haven't said were "dating" but its kinda implied. Have been for about,2-3 weeks.

[Opinion Owner]

Usually you don't kiss someone you're "just friends" with. You're dating, currently. He just hasn't used the word

[Asker]

Exactly. I mean there are people that do just kiss friends, you know the friends with benefits kind of thing but I'm not into that. And yes been dating just haven't used the word and haven't really made it official.

[JustinCaseUDontKnow]

Nothing much you can do it happens to all of us

[Anonymous]

Your first kiss is never perfect.

[Asker]

I see that now haha. Just really wish I could made it better

[Asker]

Could have*

[Opinion Owner]

It happens

[Asker]

Well what do I do now?

[Opinion Owner]

The one after that will be magical - with the right person though lol not some random person. Or maybe I don't know hah buut it will be and feel amazing too.

[Asker]

That's a relief. I've looked up tips online and i think I was so nervous in the moment that I just froze. Also he's not just some random person :P he's been my friend since last year and in the past 3 months we've become very close! :)