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I voted A... since literally a girl spends more time in the bathroom looking for herself :-)
But I don't blame any girls for it, they do it to look nice and obviously it gives us a great feeling :D
Men 100%
Women can literally just sit there, look ok, and get anything they want. Even if she looks average, a man will approach her. She doesn't even need to have a job.
Until women actively contribute more than men it will always be the same.
Depends who it is. I'm sure some girls work harder than some men for the relationship. And in an ideal world, it'd be even. But that being said, as an average, I guaren-damn-tee men put in more effort
Rules for men:
Be a good provider
Be good to her parents
Be well groomed
Be a good father
Be confident but not controlling
Be fit
Be understanding when she is "moody"
Rules for women:
Dont be fat and put out
you suck
@Afrochick Well that would be putting out...
Definitely men. Why should I put more effort into some girl who is going to decide if she wants to date me. Last girl I was with approached me and I get a lot of women approaching me even though I'm not a pretty boy.
If women think women have to put more effort, then they should try being a man pursuing a woman for one day.
Boys and girls both go to school and usually have the similar jobs and the same income and work just as hard for money. So a girl technically has the money to pay for a date. The difference is that she has to also shave wear makeup be skinny and look good cause guys are, like animals, attracted to looks only.
You try to be a woman: wear makeup, shave your legs, go to school, work just as hard as a guy and in the end having to attract a guy who doesn't even shave his beard (but dies if you have a slight mustache). I'm sure you'd love it.
@adelinawarrior Yes.
Because every man is like this and requires a woman to do this. Lol
Just stay single until you sort your own shit out. Maybe you won't be so concrrned with maintaining a bullshit bikini body and opt more to, I don't know, expand your mind.
Men just need to unite and quite asking and let the women do it for a change. I quit asking after 2nd year college and just found other hobbies.
It's not gender specific it varies by an individual and their priorities.
He's talking about the dating game as a whole. Not with just a single girl.
@rjroy3 as am I.
That's interesting
Women put more effort for relationship... doing make up all the time and dressing to impress is a lot of maintenance if you're not use to doing it on the daily
You're saying men aren't expected to style their hair, wear good clothes, put on cologne, be hygenic, etc?
Honestly, no guy is expecting women to put a cake full of make up. Both are required to dress into impress. If you're taking an hour to get ready for a guy, that's on you.
@MrNameless styling their hair doesn't take as long. Nor do they get their nails done.
I thought guys liked full makeup. One of my friends didn't want me to go out with her and the girls until I had put some more obvious makeup on. I prefer the subtle look but she insisted that guys won't notice that
Guys don't care about make up. They don't even understand it. I think most of them prefer girls looking as natural as possible, but that's the girl's choice if she wants to look that way. But if he's a decent dude, he literally wouldn't care much about if you put make up or not.
@jasmine555 Good to know
The guys I attracted when I wore full face were the hot cocky types. Those aren't always nice
Men are expected to do way more and have to live up to much more social rules and expectations... we just have to be pretty.
But that shouldn't seem like women are better than men
@Ghibli Not sure what you mean?
@Ghibli. But it does make the question more concrete. We ask you out, (for the most part), plan the first date. Plus most of us are so on ege to make you happy.
And all you do, show up, look nice for the most part.
Is it something to brag about that men have to do way more?
@Ghibl It shows how woman think... Nothing to brag about. At the same time, its also something to think about "Woman"
I'm pretty sure a great majority of us men have given up on dating for a reason
Women since it's men who approach girls they need to be the most beautiful, skinnier, bigger boobs, etc... than the other girls for being choose.
Guys doesn't paid anymore on date so...
@Bobbyhill1 That was the best respond. Asker should give me the MHO ;)
no she should not lol, men are NOT that picky, in fact men are the least picky while women are the most.
@Bobbyhill1 XD It's the other way around. Where do you live dude?
They're the more picky, after 30 women are trash for them but women would still date a man after their 30.
hahahahaha you have to be joking right now. A women is picky in a how a man carries himself, the job he has etc.. These media stereotypes dont come from nowhere. Men just look for the next target because they really dont care, the good looking female is just a plus, most women reject men for not having a trait that they like
@Bobbyhill1 Why do they reject guys who ask their number on the street then? They know nothing about them.
I wouldn't reject a girl on the streets, but a lot of girls say guys they dont like are creepy. they only like the attention from a guy that they like. men are MUCH more nicer to girls they dont like
Also consider that men exist who don't automatically go for the 9 out of 10 woman because they assume she's vain to always be looking so good (unless it's clearly due to amazing genes).
And you'd be surprised how many women disagree and believe the guy should pay on the first date.
@RedVulcan All men want 10 women you just disagree because your a guy.
I never said I doesn't wanted men to paid on date. They should paid but guys just doesn't want to spend their so precious money on women anymore.
Ah the price of being viewed as an equal. Must be so difficult.
@Rawrzz I don't want to be seen as equal this is so boring. Hopefully in my country a lot of guys are traditionnal
Wrong. Your original argument was based on looks. I want a woman I can talk to, with a great personality and brains. I'd be perfectly willing to compromise on her looks.
Second argument was unintelligible.
@Bobbyhill1 "Men just look for the next target because they really dont care"
^^ And that, RIGHT THERE, is EXACTLY the reason why women are so "picky".
Duh.
@RedVulcan So your 16 little baby it's normal you don't know how life work.
@redeyemindtricks oh? but that wasn't the argument? she was denying women being more picky? I never asked for the reason, it seems the point flew way over your head. also while there are a large group of males out there that do this there are also are large group who dont. but whatever you make your own decisions and pick who you want to be with, it doesn't make a difference at the end of the day.
@redeyemindtricks Women are picky because sex is high risk to them. If it weren't, they wouldn't care if guys were just looking for the next one.
@Rawrzz Right, that too. Nothing is going to eliminate the physical disparity between the sexes, and the fact that *most* men could literally kill *most* women at any moment if they really really wanted to.
But, also, on top of that, if men "just look for the next target because they really don't care" as this user said -- which lots of them DO -- that means the likelihood is much greater that those men will simply WALK AWAY when they're done getting whatever it is they want from the "target".
In other words... If men were more picky themselves, WE wouldn't have to worry as much about them "hitting it and quitting it", because they wouldn't want to "quit it" as often.
@redeyemindtricks Whaa. That's what opposable thumbs are for. Anybody could kill anybody at any moment. Humans in general are really weak and frail, but we still kicked animal planet's ass. Use what my mom calls "equalizers". But I get what you're saying. I at least agree with reproduction.
Lol. So if women were more like men, men would have it easier; and, if men were more like women--at least in this one aspect, I mean--then women would have it easier. Well, it's like my dad says. Wish in one hand, spit in the other. xD
@Rawrzz "Wish in one hand, spit in the other" ... uhhh I don't get it. lol.
@redeyemindtricks'' most* men could literally kill *most* women at any moment if they really really wanted to''
nobody thinks like that, and if they do then they have problems. I dont think ''aw she is cute, I can easily kill her''
@Bobbyhill1 Don't be stupid. It's called deep-rooted UNCONSCIOUS instinct.
When you're attracted to a hot young woman with an hourglass figure, you don't ACTUALLY THINK "hmm... this woman is really fertile... I could totally knock her up and make healthy babies".
Of course you don't ACTUALLY THINK that. But that's what is going on, deep down, on an instinctual level.
Same thing.
Duh.
@redeyemindtricks no its not duh stupid, because I think all the time about having babies with women like that. Its not sub conscious, I am aware of it. I see a women and I think, ''I wonder how my babies would look with her?'' you still did not tell me how ''I want to have her baby'' correlates with ''aw she's cute, I wonder how she will look with blood all over her''
@Bobbyhill1 Imagine that the average woman is 1.5 times yr size and twice as strong as you, and has enough physical strength to maim or kill you.
Also imagine that you've heard enough stories on the news about women actually DOING that -- even if it *is* relatively uncommon -- enough stories to scare you.
Just... use yr imagination here. Imagine what that would do as far as yr sense of *risk* in getting together with a new partner, and what it would do to yr willingness to have casual sex and so on.
@redeyemindtricks Err, I might have left some off. The next part is of the saying is, "see which gets filled first." So, saying the value of wishes are less than spit
@Rawrzz ohh haha, that makes considerably more sense now.
(I'm thinking, "uh... well, the hand with the spit would sting more if you used it to slap someone?" lol)
@redeyemindtricks so, you are a midget?
@Bobbyhill1 LOL midget, I'm actually ridiculously tall (6'2"), and I'm decently strong **for my build** (I'm a fitness competitor). I also grew up in one of California's most infamous neighborhoods, and I know how to street fight if I have to (= if I get the FIRST move, I'm good).
But, dude, I'm willowy as shit... I only weigh about 140 lbs. It's stupid as fuck to think most men couldn't incapacitate me if I didn't have either a weapon or the element of surprise.
@redeyemindtricks well to be quite honest, if you do know how to fight then you have a advantage, many men have no idea on what they are doing, they just have brute strength. but the men that do train and know what they are doing, thats the type you should be worried about.
And especially small dick men like myself it's really hard to compete with big black and Latin 8+inch penis
I would say both do more or less equally. It's just women put more effort in appearance, where men do in behaviour.
Women I think, maybe. A female is subjected to much higher 'standards' and she has to be tip top in a world with many gorgeous women
For me both. both have to put the effort for a relationship to work. A relationship is between 2 not just one party.
Both. We Both have things that are important in the relationship. In any relationship you should have balance and love in it. So I would have to say both! Women in a relationship help with looks and feelings. For men they usually pay for everything! So BOTH.
Both genders put equal effort in, at least in healthy relationships.
LOL, who are these girls kidding that they put so much effort into looking good.
Maybe the first date, and her wedding day... once in a long term relationship/married... girls act like they never heard of makeup, a dress... Hair goes up in a ponytail/clips and on goes the yoga / sweat pants.
Just starting to date look:
cdn.images.express.co.uk/.../111996.jpg
After dating/married a while look:
diaryofapregnantgirl.files.wordpress.com/.../mom-jeans.jpg
My men have to look as good as me or better. And I don't mind splitting costs. These are outdated gender stereotypes.
These days, men don't always pay and plan everything... nor do women primp and prepare for hours as they used to.
Times are a' changin'
Some of the comment doesn't differentiate between being in a relationship and getting in a relationship (take the initiative)
Honestly? There can never be a census on this moreover so because it's most times a matter of perception - which angle one looks at it from etc
If the relationship is healthy, neither. If the guy pays and the girl spends time prettying up, and that's what they want out of each other, that's pretty even to me.
She's referring to that area in life as a whole. Not just in terms of a single relationship.
Even still, I feel the amount of work on both sides is even.
How so?
We're talking about the approach, not a healthy relationship.
@rjroy3 While different types of effort, the amount is necessarily similar if not the same. Guys tend to pay more, so their effort is in the time and wirk it took to earn money, and girls tend to work more on appearances for the day. In the end, I'd say it's different but equal.
I'd agree if money was all that mattered.
Girls want a guy with his shit together, but also gives a damn about his looks.
Girl has to be concerned about her appearance, but she also wants a guy to put in effort on his fitness.
Girls want a guy to have a job or working towards a career. Guys really don't care that much if the girl is working if he's not the one paying for her.
Girls want a guy that is improving himself as a person and growing. Guys again don't care about that much. If she's cool now, he's cool with it. He's fine with her staying the same.
Guys have to both develop the confidence to approach girls and then learn to do it in a way that turns her on. Girls don't have to be concerned with this.
Pretty much every category girls have to be concerned with, guys do as well. But the same cannot be said the other way around. It's really not a judgment thing, it's just how things are setup. Hot girls have more value in society unless a guy works on himself.
@rjroy3 Maybe on an instance by instance basis, but I don't think the expectations are as high on men as we sometimes make it out to be. Sure, girls fantasize about their dream boy, but their expectations of men are often severely less, because most recognize that we are all imperfect and dreadfully human, and that a few personality traits are much more worth it that a set of rock hard abs.
When it comes to looks guys can be way more picky. The beauty industry doesn't favor women over women for no reason: they realize that women do have higher physical expectations placed on them.
When it comes to non-physical, guys have the higher expectations: we are expected to have kinder, gentler dispositions with very little margin for error (if a girl hits a guy in anger, provided she's not an MMA fighter, it's much more acceptable than if a guy hits a girl), and we are expected to earn more money.
Sexual expectations are a wash, in my opinions.
While I think this is definitely based on perspective, and others have different views because they have seen different things, I think what I have said still stands: I don't think women work any harder or less than men.
Women just sit on their facebook on their smartphone whole day long, then at night they take selfies.
Women's life is piss easy. If they were male, they would break and die because they can't handle being a male
There was actual an experiment done where a woman pretended to be a man and she couldn't handle it. Said it was depressing as fuck.
Lol this is so stereotyped. I approached my ex's, I pay for dates and my self maintenance isn't high so it's all "equal" in a relationship for me.
The amount of times I've put in effort to a guy and he can't even bothered to send me a text once in a while. Smh!
you're also the exception to the rule you're probably the 10% of women who do the approaching
I believe I listed more than self maintenance and approaching, as well, so, you're point?
my point is that most don't I wished more girls would
You're in the minority. Most women will not approach a man even if she likes him.
your*
You get my point.
You're means you are. Which means you're wrong. Learn the difference.
@michael45 I wasn't talking to you.
i will say men but that doesn't mean women have it easy neither.
I think women are generally more demanding which is not necesarily a bad thing,
having a bit higher stadbards is good in my opinion.
I don't believe it's the gender. I believe it's the relationship.
In which the guy tends to start.
@Gustafsone12584 Initiation is the easy part of any relationship. Also there are lots of females that initiate it.
Problem is, not getting juged to quickly.
@Gustafsone12584 Again it's the easy part. You don't have feelings yet
Eveyone has feelings? Ever been rejected? It hurts :( Woman don't get that I guess.
@Gustafsone12584 I've been rejected I do make the first move I'm impatient. But a sting in the ego hurts nothing like pouring your heart and soul into someone and they aren't
I agree :) Thats why its so dam hard dating. Most of the time, its the guy that tends to ask the person out, or start the beggings of what ever... But still hurts none the less. Because needless to say, we can debate this for days.
I think for the most part, we need to open our hearts more. Rather rejecting someone right away. I get that all the time through even the online dating. Now its easier to reject people, you can either choose the "X", or "swipe to the left".
@Gustafsone12584 But that's still not the hardest part of a relationship
No, its trusting woman.
@Gustafsone12584 way to be bias
Different kind of effort from both. How much depends on the individuals involved.
Guys, but if it's casual dating or fwbs then it's equal!
Girls have it easier here too. A girl can randomly walk up to a guy, and ask them for sex, and nine out of ten times the guy will say yes. A guy can do this, and nine out of ten times, the girl would say no.
I know that's just a rough estimate, but it seems to be true.
@EnglishArtsteacher Yes, I could walk up to a homeless guy and bang him in an ally, but that's not the dating or relationships this question is asking.
@CheshireCat89 I was referring to the comment from @SovergnessofVamps, not the question. The truth is, guys have a very hard time finding women to have sex with, unless they pay.
Women think they have it harder, men think they have it harder.
color me surprised.
women think more but men seem to care more, so I'd say it's even
Well you don't see any debate in what girls should do in a date other than look pretty, its always guys have to do the approaching the confidence and the paying while she just thinks if she should continue with the guy
There is not really an argument for this - men of course.
this is not a competition
each gender has its own input in a rl
when someone lack in a way, then the rl won t work.
Both have to put in a lot of effort. Relationships are a two-way street! The key is balance.
Well women. Because we have to do our hair and makeup and make sure our clothes look nice also. I don't mind approaching guys.
Into dating? Men.
Into relationships? Women.
BINGOOO
Wrong.. Dating is part of a relationship, so it's obviously men.
dating eventually becomes a relationship. if they so choose to be
What do women do in their relationship? it's us men who have to bring the money in
women have to: look good all the time, bear your children (birthing process is not fun), maintain a household, and for those of the 21st century like my mother, handle a business at the same time, which she does quite well. yeah, and men think they have it hard
@Mrwoo99 I make more money than my boyfriend. The mortgage is in my name.
@Dave20154 thank you for being an understanding man! I'm fully aware of what men have to deal with too.. but it's nice to have someone look at us as more of an equal, rather than just a pretty face.
being pretty never hurts though ;)
@Dave20154 and being handsome doesn't either 😊
@Dave20154 Women have to look good all the time? Says who? maintain a household? When? If a guy is working bringing home the bacon, that's the only time she has to do it, otherwise if they are both working which happens mostly in this century nowadays, he's helping that household stay up with his money. and you sound silly saying men think they have it hard, sound like a woman who's hidden behind a male profile. -.-
I look at this as a case by case basis. Sometimes you date someone who, after a while, doesn't care what the other is doing, you just want to spend time with them.
Sounds like a nice relationship
It doesn't matter. Both parties should try THEIR hardest to put more into their relationship ship than their partner.
Women can deprive themselves of food and 18 year oldboys will consider them to be "fit" and root them. This backfires when the chicks hit there mid twenties are realise they can't lose weight because they binged themselves throughout adolescence
You can't compare, both sides have different things, its equal
How many guys have you asked out?
@Gustafsone12584 i've only asked 1
I could understand your comment :) At the same time. How many guys? Wich I'm betting is a lot, seeing who you look like.
Men have to look good too we can't look like garbage when going on a date
Most men would sit at home playing video games all day, never workout and not have jobs if they didn't intend to get into relationships.
Men. By a mile.
I find your opinion invalid. You don't need to work out to get women, sure it helps. Jobs helps you get the thing you like but can get you a gold digger too so I wouldn't count at it at all not to mention that you need to pay bills, spend some cash on food, petrol, public transport etc.
To clarify things here, women do those things as well and in general it's for your own gain/good rather than getting into a relationship.
@YellowCactus I'm well aware women do these things anyway. I'm suggesting that for many men a desire to have relationships is a major driver for why they do so.
I also disagree strongly with anyone who claims people mainly workout for health.
If that was the case there would be even numbers of men and women in cardio classes and lifting weights.
Most of the men want to get big and most of the women want to get thin.
@Anonymous "If that was the case there would be even numbers of men and women in cardio classes and lifting weights. "
You can't say anything about it either because there is not enough evidence to support your claim. Once again, invalid argument.
"Most of the men want to get big and most of the women want to get thin. "
Once again, any evidence to support your evidence? There are many people who don't carea bout what you have listed here. Also you don't have any evidence since to have a 100% sure research would have to survey all the people on the planet to be 100% sure about it. So I would say what I said earlier, invalid argument.
I find your opinion on my opinion invalid. I can't be bothered to dig up studies. It seems you can't either.
@YellowCactus I have never seen more than two men in any given Zumba/fit camp class for every ten women. Here's some evidence.
Some more if you need it is how every cardio ad is targeted to mostly women. Sad that muscle gain has to go under pretense of being "equal", but their ads are occasionally subtly targeted to men too.
@Anonymous then leave it how it is ;)
It seems like it's girls, but it's actually the guys, even I have to admit. They r the ones who actually do all the planning and shit. But i dunno, could be girls too
my god thank you here's some post I've read on this site that can relate to this topic & my replies.
Poster1: My girlfriend & I are in a flash dance club in college we've dated 3 years I got our entire school to dance and end with signs saying will you marry me. Her reply was "you can be more creative than that." what do I do?
My advice: find a woman who respects & appreciates your effort.
Poster2: hi I went on a date with a guy & I offered to pay my half he shrugged and said ok sure. Now I'm hesitant to go on a 2nd date with him even though we really hit it off what do you guys think I should do?
My advice: I saw a picture the other day on Facebook was pretty awesome. The captions read, "Some women play more mind games than professor X & then wonder why they have so many X-Men." 😂
Da fuq? If someone proposed to me like that I would definitely say yes, even though I prefer something more private. And you're the one who offered to pay!!! Man, some girls, so fucking whiny!!
Both have to add in equal work. It has nothing to do with gender lmao I don't know wtf you're tryna say
Men, since it's extremely difficult to impress women these days unless you look like Spartacus or have a six digit income.
Into dating? Clearly men without a doubt.
Into a relationship? Ideally both or else said relationship will not gonna work.
Oh honey, men have to put forth many times the amount of effort in dating just to hope to get a date. I'm surprised you even asked such a question.
How would we ever know? Unless you have been both a woman and a man, you have no basis for comparison.
en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Self-Made_Man_(book)
I'm only part serious ;)
@0112358 I'm familiar with this experiment. It certainly shows some insight.
That's one for the reading list.
Men.
Guys have to approach women, thats stressful enough. Then apparently have to pay for thr dates. Once in realationship, hopefully bith make sacrafices for each other.
Probably not. The early paying and risk-taking sets the precedence for future behavior. Her doing something for him usually has strings attached and will be used as ammo in future disagreements lol. I'm such a cynic
I am ugly. I have never asked a girl out. Because she is gonna reject me anyway. Why would I show efford? So I never ask a girl out and I never be asked out. No efford for me
I see you far from ugly, boy.
@es20490446e then you should go to a eye doctor
you're not ugly, that mind set is keeping you held back. you could ask a girl out and she could say yes but you will never know if you don't try.
I can't believe you think you're ugly far from it your eyes and eyebrows are gorgeous
you are what you say you are
@FlowerChild94 I tried yesterday to ask a girl out. But she told me that i was ugly
@BlackKidWitGlasses people say that I am ugly
At least in that photo you don't seem ugly at all.
omg you're not ugly
Both are suppose to put up equal effort. It shouldn't be all one sided. When in a relationship, you chose to become a team. Teamwork is the only way to make it work.
true.
It's about even.
Men have to gain status and wealth to attract a wide array of women.
Women have to keep themselves beautiful to attract a wide array of men.
It's all for the baby making, tbh.
ARE THESE THE KIND OF "IMPORTANT" QUESTIONS YOU GUYS SPEND TIME ON NOW-A-DAYS?
No. It is a time waster. I also felt like it. Sorry, no important questions here.
Men by far. Women do nothing all they do is show up. They get a free ride
It should be 50 /50 but I think woman just put a little more than men
I'd also like to put this question in? What stuff do you think, you do more of?
I think its more of getting the relationship more grounded. Woman seem to put more effort into knowing whats going on. Men are a little lighter in the subject.
Lol not in the slightest.
@Wolfstarking. Depending upon who you are
She couldn't answer because she wanted to hear herself. Screw that. We put in more effort for many obvious reasons. If one gender has a choice, while the other relies on chance (if he's scared) then yes. Fucking men have to do more. Lol Fuck this. This is a commom sense fact!
I voted "other", and by other I mean both. Both men and women have to work hard to get a relationship, and keep it going.
I feel its both. Depending on personality and age things also changet.
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