During the talking stage, are you still single or?

[Anonymous]

So I'm confused on this. I've been talking to a guy for the last four months, and I'm still deciding on whether I want to be in a relationship with him. I like him, but I'm not ready for allat. I told him he can talk to other girls, but he told me he doesn't want to. I told him I wanted to be friends first and get to know each other. I also told him how I wanted to keep my options open.
Now there's a big party next month, and I want to meet some people. I'm just wondering how would he feel if I danced with or talked to other guys. I mean we're not together so.

[Anonymous]

You're allowed.

But if you've been thinking about maybe dating for 4 months and then head off and dance/talk to other guys... the message is pretty clear he should move on. You're not that into him.

[Asker]

It's just that I like him but there are red flags.. plus, I even told him I don't want to waste his time. He said I'm not.. so I'm just like okay..

[Opinion Owner]

And the red flags are going to magically resolve themselves? Or are you imagining you're going to learn more if you just keep talking but not dating for months?

I have no view on whether you should or shouldn't date him. I just question whether you're going to learn anything new in another 6 months of 'talking'

[Asker]

That's what I'm thinking ironically. I'm like maybe he will change. But you're right. That's why I want to meet other people to see..

[rag13]

It would bother me tbh, but at the same time I would already be done a long time ago if we were talking that long without it going any further

[Asker]

Yeah. I told him I don't want to waste his time. He said he's willing to wait.

[Account]

Yes, you are still considered single.

[Revinz]

You are not interested in him. So just make it clear and till him instead trying to get around it : "I want to keep my options open" .