Guys, Why text a girl then send short replies?

[SarahNicks]

I met this older guy he's 42 and he's a wealthy guy, always busy, always working he's a really popular realtor in the area and has joint custody of an 11 yr old daughter. So his sched is full. We met at my uncles Labor Day party & hit it off. We hang out on a different night & at the end we made out pretty heavily but we didn't have sex. I told him I didn't want to rush. He respected that and said he's not looking for just sex. He's had that before and it's vapid and gets old. So he drives me home and says "I'd like to see you again, this time I'll take you out some place nice" I said "I'd like to see you too" and he said "really? You would?" I said "yes of course" he then gives me a looooong passionate kiss goodnight. We're in Florida so this week has been hectic getting ready for hurricane Irma plus he has his kid this week so we knew we wouldn't be seeing eachother. SO this entire week he texts me every single day BUT all he writes is "Hola" or "Sup" or "Hello" and then we exchange maybe 2 -5 texts back and forth his answers still short like one sentence or a few words but after maybe 2 or 3 texts he always responds with one word answers no matter WHAT i write. Even if I'm joking or teasing or talking about his favorite band. I'll receive "yup lol" or "awe lol" and "hahaha" afterwhich i never respond bc I think he doesn't want to talk or isn't interested yet HE texted me. But then the next day he texts me again and it starts all over.

Why does he do this? I don't have any problems with anyone else. I promise I'm not boring. I'm actually pretty cute and funny and I don't write long texts. But it makes me feel like he doesn't like me at all or isn't interested in talking to me. So then why text me in the first place? I don't want to push and drag a convo out if it's dead

[TheUglyMonk]

Common mistake done by girls. It's not about him being uninterested, it's the way he texts.
If he was not interested in you he wouldn't be responding at all, if you want reassurance then meet up with him the first chance you can and check to see if he gives you his attention.

[SarahNicks]

So some guys text like that? Even if they're into you?

[TheUglyMonk]

Yes, texting gets really boring sometimes to some people, I usually only text for short conversations and meet up if I really want to talk.

[SarahNicks]

Yea I think you're right and the problem is we can't meet up yet cause of this stupid hurricane so we're stuck yet he doesn't seem like a major conversationalist over text. I just don't want to think he has me on the hook like some other guy here said but I also don't want to be rude and ignore him

[TheUglyMonk]

Just keep the conversations nice and short then call each other every once in a while, you'd be able to tell if he is trying to keep you on the hook after calling him a few times.

[SarahNicks]

Ok thanks for your help I'll try that

[Anonymous]

Why text in the first place? to keep you on the hook, that's why. If he didn't text you at all, it would be tougher to reconnect...

You are funny? you sure? Who told you that? LOL, if it was a bunch of guys then it don't count...

[SarahNicks]

I mean a lot of people in general guys and girls laugh. But that's not my point. My point is I'm trying to be interesting but he's not giving me much to work with. Keep me on the hook? that sounds bad... we're all on lockdown these next few days and I saw him Wednesday night so keeping me on the hook doesn't seem accurate. He'd ask

[HotDogg]

She's funny... looking.

[Brian-Brain]

It is very simple. Guys hate texting.
My advise is
- Only text to make an appointment.
- Send 2 or 3 texts maximum.
- Spend that time you were texting on actually being together.

[didigo182]

"always busy, always working he's a really popular realtor in the area and has joint custody of an 11 yr old daughter. So his sched is full."

You awnsered in your 1st paragraph: he has a full schedule and does not have much time.

[SarahNicks]

I think you're right. That's kind of what I figured but I let my imagination and skepticism run wild

[TheBootyChest]

Maybe he is driving or in a meeting at that moment.

[SarahNicks]

Yea he texts me a lot while he's working. I'll ask how's it going and he says "working still. Getting ready for the storm" etc

[TheBootyChest]

Have you asked him if he is sending short messages cause he is busy?

[SarahNicks]

I haven't asked but whenever he does text me he's usually working and then I see Facebook videos of him going around town showing houses

[TheBootyChest]

I think if you hint that he is giving short messages cause he is busy is better than just asking why they are so short.

[SarahNicks]

What's a good way to hint without it coming off as "nagging" or too aggressive?

[TheBootyChest]

You seem like you are busy. Want to text me when you are free?

[SarahNicks]

Oh ok that's simple and to the point. I can use that. Thanks

[TheBootyChest]

Welcome.

[Intraluminal]

I have a feeling that, since he's a salesman, he's also a "notch counter." It would explain the generic "sup" and the generic responses.

[SarahNicks]

A notch counter? Like he's texting a million other girls? So should I just not respond the next time he texts me?

[Intraluminal]

Obviously, I cannot *prove* what I'm saying, but what you *appear* to be looking at is essentially a sales technique applied to sexual conquest.

You find a girl. She has sex with you. Fine, you won.
You find a girl. She adamantly refuses to have sent with you ever. Fine. You remove her name from your list.
You find a girl. She needs some convincing. You put her name on a "tickler file." Every now and then you say, what's up, or thinking of you, or something similar that you can send to everyone in your tickler file. If she responds then you respond back with a generic response, until she says something that makes her sound more actionable. Then you move her up to the pending file... and so on.

In real estate sales you'd send, "It was so nice meeting with you about your house. I'm still very interested in helping you sell it and I'm sure I can get top dollar for it. Keep me. in mind."

[Intraluminal]

The great thing about this technique is, done well, when you finally meet again he can say that he's been after you for months, even though he only spent 10 seconds on you every two weeks. "But we've be talking for months. I text you every week!" Some stupid girl will swallow that line.

Can I prove that this is what he's doing? No. I cannot. But I'd bet money on it.

[SarahNicks]

Lol this is pretty diabolical but also likely probable. So ok what do you suggest I do? This is how HE behaves and is thinking but what should I DO and SAY to move myself up and or distinguish myself? Or as you'd put it "put down an offer" lol

[Intraluminal]

Well, the truth is, of this is what he's doing, he's doing it in volume. The only way to move yourself up the list is to make it clear that you're sexually available or that you *could* be sexually available with a little wooing. If he is doing this en mass as I suspect, then there is no "relationship" at the end of this rainbow, although you could probably work it for some nice dinners.

[SarahNicks]

How do I do let him know I'm sexually available and with a little wooing?

[Intraluminal]

That's a complex question, but i would think that as a woman you might know better than I. Just be flirtatious. I mean, maybe I'm wrong. It's just that successful salesmen tend to be sociopaths. You kind of have to be. I mean, he's not selling anything that someone else isn't selling, nor can he sell it for more in actuality, so...

[SarahNicks]

Hmmm they do tend to be sociopaths and from some of the things he was telling me that night he sounds like one too.

[Intraluminal]

So you either have to make them believe that you can sell it for more - a lie, or that you deserve to sell it because you're their friend - a probable lie, or because you pester them into it, which means that you're willing to annoy people for money. All those methods are sociopathic to some degree or other.

[SarahNicks]

That doesn't sound like a good boyfriend or husband material to be honest. Why are all those methods sociopathic? Is it bc theyre all manipulative and not genuine?

[JohnDoesy]

His wife or girlfriend is around. Pure and simple

[SarahNicks]

Oh geez. He's single. 100%

[Anonymous]

I do the same thing I see nothing wrong with it