Why do good men always get rejected?

[suryaprakashtripathy]

Why do good men get rejected? I've seen girls dating all kinda douchebags who don't even look good but they turn down good men. Why so?

[ThatPersonOverThere]

So here's the secret... are you ready?
There is Reality and there is Perception.

The shitbag, in reality, is a terrible partner. He is PERCEIVED as a good partner because of his confidence.

The good guy, in reality, is the better partner. However if he is perceived as weaker or less worthy because he doesn't carry himself in a confident manner then he loses.

Take note of the things you do throughout the day, the times where you caved or backed down, the things which signalled a lack of confidence. Stop presenting yourself as an unconfident man and you'll do much better.

Head held high, always. Force yourself to if you must. Shoulders back. Get that swagger when you walk. Gaze women dead in the eye when you talk to them, and don't fidget.

Women CAN'T choose a man based on who is ACTUALLY better, because they don't actually know which one is better. They do know which one Appears better, so control your perception.

[suryaprakashtripathy]

Wow that answer is gonna help me a lot. Thanks 😊

[pasoccer]

Maybe you're searching for the wrong type of woman.
Now onto your side of things. The good men get taken fairly quickly. The problem is usually the single people in the pool outnumber us good people a million to one. The girls looking for the right guy get duped, or taken by another good guy almost immediately.
I have one girlfriend; I'm the perfect guy for her, except I don't have a career that meets her expectations. She also dates total strangers every time, and they're all super serious relationships within two weeks of dating.
I suggest doing what makes you happy. A good one will find you on the way.

[Rainie_]

“Always” is quite an exaggeration. If good guys always get rejected then how come I’m dating a “good guy”? The difference with him is that he’s confident and he takes care of himself and others and has a lot more to offer than just being a “good guy”.
You can’t just expect to be able to get girls simply because you’re a “good guy”, that’s only one quality out of many that plays a role in why a girl would date someone.

[Anonymous]

The pull towards someone that makes us excited and wet is strong..

[Trentonator]

Good men get rejected at "first." The girls will grow up eventually and realize they need someone who is actually in the relationship for "them" and not for "themselves." This has spawned the pouplar phrase "nice guys finish last." It will take them a little while to get over what they think they "want" and understand what it is they are going to "need" so just be patient... In the meantime just tell yourself that you don't want to be with a girl like that anyway... Nice guys may finish last but they still finish... After all No Woman wants to put up with a guy that keeps "finishing" first anyway. 😉 Keep your chin up brother, bieng a nice guy pays off in the end... The "Woman" you end up with will be well worth the wait...

[Trentonator]

Let me clarify for all the ladies out there. My objective is not to single anyone out... Men are just as guilty of this. It takes everyone a little time to figure out what "really matters." I wish everyone the best of luck in finding that special person. 😋

[Mrblueballs42]

Well most women want bad guys and hate nice guys.
They mostly want to feel physical attraction. Plus whatever qualities they think is good for them.
Women sorry to say it really have no clue what they want.

They think nice guys are weak, And lack confidence.
They think that a guy who is confident in themselves is what they need. But these guys use them and hurt them. The bad boys only want their bodies dont even stay around after they are used. Women call all guys jerks and think we all are the same.
Sadly nice guys will always be last. While the boys abuse and hurt them are first.

[bacca400]

First, "nice guy" is often the same as an "insecure guy" and girls like confident guys. Confidence is so important for communication and communication is the foundation of a relationship. "Nice guy" does not mean "confident guy" so don't confuse the two. Girls want a confident, respectful guy. And I don't blame them.

I like confident girls too.

[Canuck37]

Girls like strong, confident men, regardless of whether they're good or bad. Many good men aren't confident, so they get rejected.

Note that "confident" does not necessarily mean "arrogant." However, arrogance does sometimes come across as confidence, which is one reason why it sometimes seems like bad boys get the girls. But older women would know better, and I believe they counsel the young girls on this matter.

[Chaoseverywhere]

a lot of reasons.
1. your social akwardness
2. maybe a body language issue
3. you approach like a creep
4. you ask them the wrong questions
5. you're prob scared of rejection so you don't ask much, so you have lack of experience. Hence stuck in nice guy land.

Not directly at you personally, just in general

[johntitor6916]

Think of it this way: Women will always want to end up being with the *best possible* mate, and aggression, arrogance, etc are highly testosterone driven traits. So in a room, every woman will be striving to attract the most "male" man and that is not the quiet shy nice guy in the corner. Whereas men are striving to *not be the guy left in the room at the end without a female* at all.

[Chris_Humble]

Aah the good ol' 'nice guy'. People tend to be turned off by people who think others owe them for their 'niceness'. They are most often, clingy, high maintenance, doormats and losers who find their soothing in their 'moral superiority' by being 'nice'. Even if it's just a means to an selfish end.
Nice guys suck.

[deric_97]

Bro they don't find good guys attractive. Otherwise, they aren't convinced that they can have a great time with good guys.

[adolescentswede]

I am not convinced this is true. However I got a agreeableness/competition score of roughly 50% in big five personality test and got roughly 50% rejections when flirting with women in my teens

[aloysious]

Women don’t gravitate towards assholes. Most good men/ nice guys aren’t all that good or nice. It’s just somebody doing nice things for the girl and expecting compensation for his efforts in the form of a relationship or sex

[Anonymous]

So, are you saying good women do not get rejected? I am sure there a few around here that will debate that..

[Rhys_r15]

Because they date the douchebags for a fling and then they settle for the good men after. There is a reason they say the nice guy comes last. It's because he does.

[Van121986]

If they grow some balls to walk away, they don't have to.

[outside_Toronto]

They're obviously not that good... not at the dating game anyway.

[jirwin7979]

I wonder the same thing but i just gave up i been told iam way to nice

[BMorgan123]

Well Bub. Its more like this. When gitls see the assholes. They think they can fix them. Because its a "job" or something to do.

[ClauClau]

They're usually considered boring on account of their lack of confidence.

[TheUglyMan]

Because women wanna get screwed over by Chad. They fantasize over that shit.

[diegobrando]

Because they Want the jock meatheads they don't care about smarts

[ahmadashrafrajput]

Don't know the reason.
But the same case is with me

[TheQuest1981]

Watch Jordan Peterson

[hopeworld1]

Because were too good for them

[ERFan01]

I've been wondering this for a long time as well

[genericname85]

good men don't always get rejected. boring men do.

[opurba]

Coz they hesitated to fuck or kiss or desperate.

[daipham]

Because they like bad boys

[suryaprakashtripathy]

And why's that?

[daipham]

Because they are bad boys

[micky890]

Because some people just dont see whats inside

[navin9999]

If i say i love you... would you accept

[Wwwyzzerdd]

Women like shitty men.

[Mbored92]

they find the douchebags more exciting

[2opaz]

women dont know what they want

[bradfordro]

We are assholes that's why

[Iwearyouwell]

They don't

[azzntittiz]

Define a good man.

[BMorgan123]

A Good Guy is who Takes care of business. Has a Job. Dosent slack off. Who dosent bitch mone or grown. About shit they dont have. A good guy works for hus shit and dosent expect handouts

[Trentonator]

A good man puts the needs of others above his own. He is honest and kind. I was wondering if you could difine a good woman for me?

[azzntittiz]

Every man thinks of himself what you just said above, and it doesn't define a good man. Life is about more than that, and many men no matter his looks, status or class usually don't know what being a good man is.

I think you're bitching and moaning right now, about people not wanting to date good men. There are good men out there that have quietly snatched up a good woman and improved her.

And even then there are men who think improving a woman means being controlling and rude. They also think a good woman is a girl who is obedient and has no mind of her own. Both of you have little to no clue.

[Trentonator]

I don't think improving a woman is a controlling thing... I hope to find someone who makes me a better person just as I make her a better person. When did anyone say a good woman has no mind of her own? Where did you get that from? I think you have the wrong idea about both of us actually. To be honest you sound quite defensive for what seems like no reason whatsoever. If I have offended you in anyway inslassure you it was not my intention. Why is it you have chosen to attack us? And why is it you have yet to give me your definition of what a good woman is?

[Anonymous]

Girls like bad guys.

[Trentonator]

Yes they do, but they will grow into women eventually...

[Van121986]

@Trentonator and whether the good men would accept them later is another question.

Most likely not