Definitely is true. My life on the dating scene is shite. But I have met many girl's who liked my nice approach lol. Don't be a push over though, especially with people. I help my family only really. Be kind etc but if people are twats screw them lol. Move on and try to find better company. Also expand your interests and discover new activities, hopefully meeting new girl's.
Yes buddy it is possible. Being nice is good. Every gentleman is nice. It shows that you have manners and know how to behave. It's always a sign to be a good person. That's a good thing, but being too nice makes you look depressed. Other start thinking then that they can use you as much as they want and that's bad. The line between a gentleman and a naiv person who gets used by others is thin. Try to stay on the bright side of life. Too much of anything can't be good.
No no no... be be be nice!! Be yourself!! Don't change for no one!! I would date you! But never change for who you are... you are beautiful no matter what other girls or woman says to you. You just haven't found your match sweets.
It is possible to be too nice, but that's not the reason why you fail in flirting. Being too nice might mean being too naive or something, and i thing your problem towards the women is not being extroverted enough or just not knowing how to pick girls who might actually suit you as a couple
Being to nice is wrong for the wrong women who like unapproachable commitment phobics. So yes, with some women you lose if you are too nice. The best combination is kindness and confidence. Build up more confidence and then you can deal better with women who reject you because you are too "nice"
Yes, people walk over you. I was always a super nice friendly girl. Ever since I found out that people used me, talked behind my back and told people my secrets I’ve been cold.
I may be nice, but I have never allowed anyone to walk over me. I'm nice because I see no reason to be mean or rude to people unless the deserve it. I'm the type of person who doesn't give second chances to people. Screw me over once and I cut you from my life.
it is, however dont become a dick. what you need to do is learn to not be trampled upon, which you seem to fit into the "typical nice guy" category for
It is possible to be too overly nice. I actually really like guys who are super nice. U just have to be very careful with that tho because people will try and take advantage of you and use you because they know they can get away with it.
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Anonymous
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Nope it isn't.
1. You have kids maybe some women do not like that or have their own kids, etc 2. None of that info really gives you an idea of the type of person you are, just that you are a responsible person. 3. Nice men finish last for a reason.
There's a difference between being nice and a pushover. When people say, "Nice guys finish last" it really means guys who sacrifice their integrity/dignity to please people. Who can have amazing manners and be extremely polite but if someone wants you to do something you don't want to do or feel comfortable doing then stand firm. There's nothing wrong in doing that.
I am trying setting people always from me if people take me for granted. I was very nice before. Now I am nice or if you break my trust not going be nice again.
I didn't read the details just the title of your question. Yes it is possible to be too nice and let me tell you this, being too nice gives people the chance to hurt you more which sucks. 😊
That makes no sense. He guy just chats nonchalantly; he’s got no ulterior motives and no desire to ‘dominate.’ The dude’s just a regular guy who says hello and that’s it.
The point is that’s not being pushy, it’s lrobably being too laid back. Hence too nice, or maybe, he lacks aggression deep down. You know, maybe his true self is just meek.
@BlackMaleYou Well you know how people say that often girls are into bad boys... god knows why maybe charm, maybe ability to flirt and we get fooled by that. At one point were sick of that and we look for a good guy to spoil, have fun and eventually turn into caring mode and make him fat. :D Usually good guys try to be gentleman, sometimes a little shy to approach the girl but some actually do pretty well. My man is the kindest guy on the world so down to earth, but his flirting is 10/10 proving that good guys can be exiting by my opinion.
Also there is a mis conception that bad guys are good looking and good guys are just average. I think good guys are exciting depending on the girl. They say girls take advantage of/walk over some good guys. A good person would not walk over a good guy. I've seen girls that are afraid of dating good guys cos they feel like they he is so good, I will hurt him. I think what a person likes is just more a reflection of how they are and its not necessarily that the thing they like is the best. If good men are hard to find. I think its also safe to say good women and those that appreciate good men are hard to find to.
@BlackMaleYou can't agree more with you to be honest. Well my good guy is pretty average too nothing special in looks. Maybe just players take a little more care for themself to attract more girls, but they really aren't by my taste. At the start i had that fear too that he's too good for me. I am good and loyal but he was just so perfect inside as a person that i was afraid that if i screw something i will lose him. And a lot of girls take advantage of good man thats true but sadly i can't do anything about it. Some will want money others the stability that he won't cheat or something... everyone with their reasons.
I think that a good guy shouldn't be angry to lose a girl that would take advantage of him cos a good woman/person wouldn't. A good man should be looking for a good woman. I think ur fear was that u might lose him because u might screw up, this girl was scared because she doesn't trust herself not to hurt him. She is aware she is aware that her loyalty is flaky and she doesn't deserve that so she rather be with a guy who is the opposite so she wouldn't feel guilty as much. some girls are just used to being treated bad that a good thing is just to much and weird.
@BlackMaleYou This is the most insightful thing I’ve read on GirlsAskGuys. If most men are dumbfucks, then most women probably are too. It’s so simple and yet so not obvious.
Thanks man! There are lots of disgusting people I guess.
Yes u are welcome. But also think its more than one thing. I also think women get married later nowadays so they dont think longterm anymore as before. some good guys should be smart to. Some do not understand that women have superficial expectations to as much as men. Guys like boobs, femininity, lots of sex etc women like abs, masculinity, GOOD SEX (just type "good dick memes" on google images, u will discover what good sex can do lol) etc. Whatever personality u have would mean a lot more when u meet most of her superficial expectations. So guys should spend time improving the superficial part than just being the good guy. Instead of being the good guy be the hot guy that is good. All that being said, I would choose a girl that is a 6/10, good and warm hearted than a cold hearted 10/10 that has no depth to her.
Lol! Don't see it as just being superficial but as loving ur body. Giving ur body a treat. Of course its gonna feel off when u start wearing stuff u are not used to. But u will get used to it. Find a fashion style that u admire and are comfortable with. An arm tattoo of something artistic that inspires u most, cool earrings, necklace and good cloths can be an image changer. That might be too far for some guys so just simply wearing the right shit can put u on the map. Then u get a fit/muscular body to go with it that even ur female friends would drool over. work on ur sex game. Getting ur outward appearance at its best can boost ur confidence to say hi to her.
Thats after she can't stop looking at u. Build confidence while doing all this. Its all marketing and to sell u will need to approach a chick like she is about to buy something she won't find else where. Kind of like she is doing herself a favour choosing u. Women love confidence.
@BlackMaleYou Well confidence and being my own sales guy seems slightly like two different things. Either way, I’ll consider your ideas but I’d have to do them my way, which includes band shirts, long hair and perhaps starting a punk band.
I’ve actually recently started doing this and have noticed some more attention than before. But I’m still not mainstream hip-hop, so I’m not going to get that crowd regardless. But, there’s a niche out there for rebels and intellectual activists— that’s my game.
Doesn’t work too well for clubs, parties or flings, but seems good at attracting higher quality girls who are relatable. In fact, I don’t even bother with clubs because it’s not a place for me. I miss out on that section of meeting people, but my niche is a place those guys can’t touch. Honestly I meet women in my university library or in class more often than at parties, and it works better for me since I like to engage in academic hobbies.
Yeah the confidence to put urself out there will come from the likely hood of someone buying what u are selling. If u are convinced that u are the shit, and girls commenting on ur looks or style confidence increases. Confidence and selling urself are completely different things. figuratively speaking, there is a different confidence with selling products that is a solution to a problem.. at least to a niche group. Women wear make up sometimes just for the confidence they say lol. I think that u are on the right track. Find a style that make u feel like u are still urself. Something that makes u comfortable. Like what u just mentioned that attracts high quality chicks. It also depends on the city. The punk band thing can work with girls in cities where that kind of music is a huge deal
@BlackMaleYou Actually I’m in a part of Ca where punk-rock repels tons of women because hop-hop rules the day out here. The thing, though, is that I wouldn’t, and don’t, like those women anyway. My dating pool is much smaller than average because of this, but I tried in high school to learn to like hip-hop but it never happened. It’s just not who I am/not relatable.
I’m slowly realizing it’s this more than anything else that explains why women don’t make themselves available to me and go for other guys instead over me — it’s because those other guys are more normal. They can relate to the current popular trend, and that’s what matters most.
Either way, doesn’t matter. I recently had a girl tell me I was a ‘knob’ when she found out the stats class we met in wasn’t required for my major or graduation, I was just in there because I enjoyed learning about statistics. She stopped talking to me after that.
So, I think there’s a certain disdain for people who are naturally positive in situations where most people feel negative.
You gotta have a certain firm attitude about you to pull off being nice cause there's two real levels there's being gentle and there's coming off as timid no women iv ever met likes a timid man but that's just been my experience
Too nice, depends on the women, if she wants someone to challenge her than yeah she'll be turn of and eventually in up with a criminal but if she can appreciate your niceness then she's probably Asian lol
Being nice is a great (and expected) quality to have in a partner. But only so long as it goes in hand with assertiveness. Don’t be afraid to say no sometimes, and never compromise on your values.
What Girls & Guys Said
Opinion
57Opinion
Definitely is true. My life on the dating scene is shite. But I have met many girl's who liked my nice approach lol.
Don't be a push over though, especially with people. I help my family only really.
Be kind etc but if people are twats screw them lol. Move on and try to find better company.
Also expand your interests and discover new activities, hopefully meeting new girl's.
Yes buddy it is possible. Being nice is good. Every gentleman is nice. It shows that you have manners and know how to behave. It's always a sign to be a good person. That's a good thing, but being too nice makes you look depressed. Other start thinking then that they can use you as much as they want and that's bad. The line between a gentleman and a naiv person who gets used by others is thin. Try to stay on the bright side of life. Too much of anything can't be good.
No no no... be be be nice!! Be yourself!! Don't change for no one!! I would date you! But never change for who you are... you are beautiful no matter what other girls or woman says to you. You just haven't found your match sweets.
It is possible to be too nice, but that's not the reason why you fail in flirting. Being too nice might mean being too naive or something, and i thing your problem towards the women is not being extroverted enough or just not knowing how to pick girls who might actually suit you as a couple
Being to nice is wrong for the wrong women who like unapproachable commitment phobics. So yes, with some women you lose if you are too nice. The best combination is kindness and confidence. Build up more confidence and then you can deal better with women who reject you because you are too "nice"
Yes, people walk over you. I was always a super nice friendly girl. Ever since I found out that people used me, talked behind my back and told people my secrets I’ve been cold.
I may be nice, but I have never allowed anyone to walk over me. I'm nice because I see no reason to be mean or rude to people unless the deserve it. I'm the type of person who doesn't give second chances to people. Screw me over once and I cut you from my life.
it is, however dont become a dick. what you need to do is learn to not be trampled upon, which you seem to fit into the "typical nice guy" category for
It is possible to be too overly nice. I actually really like guys who are super nice. U just have to be very careful with that tho because people will try and take advantage of you and use you because they know they can get away with it.
Nope it isn't.
1. You have kids maybe some women do not like that or have their own kids, etc 2. None of that info really gives you an idea of the type of person you are, just that you are a responsible person. 3. Nice men finish last for a reason.
Welcome to the hookup generation.
Hard facts here. The hook up generation. Most people are not thinking longterm
There's a difference between being nice and a pushover. When people say, "Nice guys finish last" it really means guys who sacrifice their integrity/dignity to please people. Who can have amazing manners and be extremely polite but if someone wants you to do something you don't want to do or feel comfortable doing then stand firm. There's nothing wrong in doing that.
I am trying setting people always from me if people take me for granted. I was very nice before. Now I am nice or if you break my trust not going be nice again.
I didn't read the details just the title of your question. Yes it is possible to be too nice and let me tell you this, being too nice gives people the chance to hurt you more which sucks. 😊
The real problem here is the fact that people want to hurt kind people.
It’s not on him, it’s on them.
If you come across another woman who understands what it means to be nice, then she wouldn't consider you "too nice".
Some people are skeptical of nice people because they don't relate, they may see the world from a glass half-empty type of way.
I don’t think it’s “being too nice”, i think it’s being too pushy, caring too much and trying too hard.
That makes no sense. He guy just chats nonchalantly; he’s got no ulterior motives and no desire to ‘dominate.’ The dude’s just a regular guy who says hello and that’s it.
@RaijuRainBird i dont understand your comment.
The point is that’s not being pushy, it’s lrobably being too laid back. Hence too nice, or maybe, he lacks aggression deep down. You know, maybe his true self is just meek.
Woman love that and are looking for a good man when it comes to longterm. If they aren't ready to settle down they will look for something exiting.
What makes being not nice exciting? Can a nice person be exciting?
@BlackMaleYou Well you know how people say that often girls are into bad boys... god knows why maybe charm, maybe ability to flirt and we get fooled by that. At one point were sick of that and we look for a good guy to spoil, have fun and eventually turn into caring mode and make him fat. :D Usually good guys try to be gentleman, sometimes a little shy to approach the girl but some actually do pretty well. My man is the kindest guy on the world so down to earth, but his flirting is 10/10 proving that good guys can be exiting by my opinion.
Also there is a mis conception that bad guys are good looking and good guys are just average. I think good guys are exciting depending on the girl. They say girls take advantage of/walk over some good guys. A good person would not walk over a good guy. I've seen girls that are afraid of dating good guys cos they feel like they he is so good, I will hurt him.
I think what a person likes is just more a reflection of how they are and its not necessarily that the thing they like is the best.
If good men are hard to find. I think its also safe to say good women and those that appreciate good men are hard to find to.
@BlackMaleYou can't agree more with you to be honest. Well my good guy is pretty average too nothing special in looks. Maybe just players take a little more care for themself to attract more girls, but they really aren't by my taste.
At the start i had that fear too that he's too good for me. I am good and loyal but he was just so perfect inside as a person that i was afraid that if i screw something i will lose him. And a lot of girls take advantage of good man thats true but sadly i can't do anything about it. Some will want money others the stability that he won't cheat or something... everyone with their reasons.
I think that a good guy shouldn't be angry to lose a girl that would take advantage of him cos a good woman/person wouldn't. A good man should be looking for a good woman.
I think ur fear was that u might lose him because u might screw up, this girl was scared because she doesn't trust herself not to hurt him. She is aware she is aware that her loyalty is flaky and she doesn't deserve that so she rather be with a guy who is the opposite so she wouldn't feel guilty as much.
some girls are just used to being treated bad that a good thing is just to much and weird.
@BlackMaleYou This is the most insightful thing I’ve read on GirlsAskGuys. If most men are dumbfucks, then most women probably are too. It’s so simple and yet so not obvious.
Thanks man! There are lots of disgusting people I guess.
Yes u are welcome. But also think its more than one thing. I also think women get married later nowadays so they dont think longterm anymore as before. some good guys should be smart to. Some do not understand that women have superficial expectations to as much as men. Guys like boobs, femininity, lots of sex etc women like abs, masculinity, GOOD SEX (just type "good dick memes" on google images, u will discover what good sex can do lol) etc. Whatever personality u have would mean a lot more when u meet most of her superficial expectations. So guys should spend time improving the superficial part than just being the good guy. Instead of being the good guy be the hot guy that is good.
All that being said, I would choose a girl that is a 6/10, good and warm hearted than a cold hearted 10/10 that has no depth to her.
@BlackMaleYou You are legit blowing my mind with this information. I think you’ve got it exactly right. That’s crazy.
But I don’t want to be superficial! Damn it! It makes me feel like a moron when I try.
Lol! Don't see it as just being superficial but as loving ur body. Giving ur body a treat.
Of course its gonna feel off when u start wearing stuff u are not used to. But u will get used to it. Find a fashion style that u admire and are comfortable with. An arm tattoo of something artistic that inspires u most, cool earrings, necklace and good cloths can be an image changer. That might be too far for some guys so just simply wearing the right shit can put u on the map. Then u get a fit/muscular body to go with it that even ur female friends would drool over.
work on ur sex game. Getting ur outward appearance at its best can boost ur confidence to say hi to her.
Thats after she can't stop looking at u. Build confidence while doing all this. Its all marketing and to sell u will need to approach a chick like she is about to buy something she won't find else where. Kind of like she is doing herself a favour choosing u. Women love confidence.
@BlackMaleYou Well confidence and being my own sales guy seems slightly like two different things. Either way, I’ll consider your ideas but I’d have to do them my way, which includes band shirts, long hair and perhaps starting a punk band.
I’ve actually recently started doing this and have noticed some more attention than before. But I’m still not mainstream hip-hop, so I’m not going to get that crowd regardless. But, there’s a niche out there for rebels and intellectual activists— that’s my game.
Doesn’t work too well for clubs, parties or flings, but seems good at attracting higher quality girls who are relatable. In fact, I don’t even bother with clubs because it’s not a place for me. I miss out on that section of meeting people, but my niche is a place those guys can’t touch. Honestly I meet women in my university library or in class more often than at parties, and it works better for me since I like to engage in academic hobbies.
Yeah the confidence to put urself out there will come from the likely hood of someone buying what u are selling. If u are convinced that u are the shit, and girls commenting on ur looks or style confidence increases. Confidence and selling urself are completely different things. figuratively speaking, there is a different confidence with selling products that is a solution to a problem.. at least to a niche group.
Women wear make up sometimes just for the confidence they say lol.
I think that u are on the right track. Find a style that make u feel like u are still urself. Something that makes u comfortable. Like what u just mentioned that attracts high quality chicks.
It also depends on the city. The punk band thing can work with girls in cities where that kind of music is a huge deal
@BlackMaleYou Actually I’m in a part of Ca where punk-rock repels tons of women because hop-hop rules the day out here. The thing, though, is that I wouldn’t, and don’t, like those women anyway. My dating pool is much smaller than average because of this, but I tried in high school to learn to like hip-hop but it never happened. It’s just not who I am/not relatable.
I’m slowly realizing it’s this more than anything else that explains why women don’t make themselves available to me and go for other guys instead over me — it’s because those other guys are more normal. They can relate to the current popular trend, and that’s what matters most.
U would have way more fun in Berlin tho. Hip hop is not that big here.
yes, it might look like you're faking it, like I've met people like that and it makes me wonder if they're faking it
Either way, doesn’t matter. I recently had a girl tell me I was a ‘knob’ when she found out the stats class we met in wasn’t required for my major or graduation, I was just in there because I enjoyed learning about statistics. She stopped talking to me after that.
So, I think there’s a certain disdain for people who are naturally positive in situations where most people feel negative.
don't change yourself for anyone. if they don't like it, who cares? being naturally kind is a gift you should never give up.
You gotta have a certain firm attitude about you to pull off being nice cause there's two real levels there's being gentle and there's coming off as timid no women iv ever met likes a timid man but that's just been my experience
Too nice, depends on the women, if she wants someone to challenge her than yeah she'll be turn of and eventually in up with a criminal but if she can appreciate your niceness then she's probably Asian lol
True. Only women I know that really apreciated kindness were Asian women.
Being nice is a great (and expected) quality to have in a partner. But only so long as it goes in hand with assertiveness. Don’t be afraid to say no sometimes, and never compromise on your values.