Why is there such a high physical standard for women, but not men? (Page 2)

Question

Women must have big boobs, big butt, no stomach, be thick but with no fat in the undesirable regions, be pretty, have long hair, be average height. Men can look however they want and still shame women for not having what they want. This is because I saw a post online saying "How do you flat ass girls feel when you walk past a group of guys knowing you about to ruin their day?"

Panickinatthedisco · Answer

I think the "ideal body type" proposed in society has more to do with women attacking other women. Usually men don't care what you look like. They usually are not the ones attacking women's attributes. All you can do is train yourself not to judge. Now that's a hard thing to do. Something I still struggle with but change comes from within.

Repa33 · Answer

There is. "He has to be 6'4. Abs. Tanned skin or dark. He has to be ripped and in shape. He has to be handsome like a model. He has to have hair but not be hairy. He has to have a 7 incher or more"

MistQueen23 · Answer

Dude i saw a post the other day on Facebook calling men "girls" if he's shorter than 6'0. Or something like that.. it seriously goes both ways. Just be happy with yourself and forget what others think. You should want to be healthy and maintain the best standards you can for yourself. That's for both genders.

mrmagic1117 · Answer

I've found women to hold a far stricter hold on appearance than that of men.
Women often put down in their profiles how much they value this quality and that quality, however the guy must first pass the appearance test first. If a guy has too much weight he is passed by super fast. I send request after request to women telling them how much I feel connected to the things they have said in their profiles and nearly half the time my messages get "unread deleted" because I'm overweight right now.
It doesn't matter that I'm overweight because I was injured while serving in the Marines and almost died and have spent the last 5 to 10 years fighting to regain the ability to walk and breathe on my own.
So much for the ladies looking for a good man that will treat them right.

SamoBomb · Answer

But men must have a deep voice, be muscular/fit, basically have no fat, not is specific regions but everywhere, not to mention a healthy body fat %for women is 7% higher then for men which means men have to work harder for that, also we have to be tall, have confidence for some reason we aren't supposed to have emotions, and be a protector, and since we are an "entitled white male" (some guys arnt white but you get my point) we end up getting more backlash for anything we do or say about anything. I think its about equal for men vs women is this regard, we are both given unfair standards.

wadeabeee · Answer

You are obviously a woman if you say that. You are blind. Look at any Disney prince and see how perfect he is!!! Look at ever highschool show or movie having the boys be played by 20 year old men that look like Greek gods. Listen to songs pressuring for men to be at least 6ft or to have at least a 6inch dick. There is far more UNREALISTIC pressure on men. Women face get a lot of this pressure in their head from model magazines designed to make them buy the shit to look better. In all reality women are loved by men for any one of those aspects you mentioned. People generally like a healthy person of similar life style choices and after that boobs, butt, face, belly, sex, and whatever physical think they like is a preference or just bonus. Guys like boobs, but if you got an ass then boobs don't matter. With men, they think they need to have the full package to make a woman happy.

endofcain · Answer

It's true to say men do not put near the same effort that women do, and in a sense it is because of past. Men were the ones who held high positions and brought in money. Parents would do their best to make their daughters beautiful so they could get a good looking rich man. Through this people created products and ideas to make women better looking, and it persisted. Now women believe they have to do such things just to find a good man and the products just keep evolving. We men are actually very simple creatures with each having his own preference. And as diverse as we are culturally no one thing is right. So people keep coming out with more things to enhance the beauty of women. Realistically none of it is needed. But since you won't get everyone in the world to stop it's going to continue. Little long winded but I hope it helps.

blondfrog · Answer

Women aren't as visual, but the difference are small. I have no idea what you're talking about. Men are held to just as high standard as women maybe not just physically but socially and financially. Men are expected to look a certain way and men have a universal standard of attractiveness too. Most women are attracted to the white or nicely tan guy with black hair, strong jawline, expected to be a certain height usually 6'1-6'4. We are expected to have a certain body type and look. We have to have abs, nice strong arms and hands, a muscular chest, and basically a fit athletic type of body build. Even with clothes we get judged more than women actually. A man wears a purse or dress he is automatically labeled as gay and unattractive, but a woman can wear man clothes and nobody really cares unless its really manly. A woman can also carry around a wallest and nobody will care.

Anonymous · Answer

Big boobs, flat stomach, thick legs & butt, 💯 AMAZING. But guys who shame women for not having those "perks" are a bunch children that have no respect. I hate seeing people hate there bodies and get plastic surgery because they they don't have the "perfect" body according to society. There's guys out there that like you just the way your are, so don't ruin it just to try and fit in. I'd rather be with someone with normal size everything and all natural instead of someone that's full of a bunch of silicone. She can be the most exotic woman one can dream of but if she got a nasty personality I can't see myself with them for long.

Anonymous · Answer

So you see one misogynist's post and assume that there is so much more pressure on women to look better than men? The standards for them are exactly the same. Men are expected to be tall, to have big muscles, to have a large penis. They have to have a square and well-defined jawline, nice tousled hair. Why does it seem ok to reject a guy for not being tall enough but it's horrible and bullying if you reject a girl for how much she weighs? I'm not saying that you are wrong, women do seem to be judged more on how they look. Unfortunately, our male-dominated society still seems to value more attractive women for how they look, not who they are. But men have to conform to certain images too. It's a shit time for both genders if you're insecure about your body and your looks.

keenybmr · Answer

Yo I haven't left my house in 50-60 days due to an exam. I haven't had the chance to get a haircut and im running a fever. Hence I haven't even bothered to shave. I look terrible right now. According to you, at my current position, I can score any chick right? lol

TinaSP · Answer

Women think they have to be perfect but its all about themselves really. Men.. real men... dont even notice our flaws. They want a real woman.
Thr obssession with body and specially fashion comes from the competition bitches have with each other

skullcorn · Answer

I hate guys that do that. But we hace similar standards. He have to be tall. Preferably over 6'0 can't weigh more than 200lbs. Must have short hair or bad ass long hair. No facial hair. And no acne. So women aren't the only ones. They also dont realise us guys might still want the chubby ones. Or the ones with flat asses. Or the no tits. I am perfectly fine with those. I know my friends are. My best buddy james. One of the most popular kids in school. He could have literally any of the girls there. But his girlfriend isn't the "perfect girl" she is like 5'2 around 200lbs short hair. And goes by the name samuel. So you just gotta find the right guys in highschool

FractiousMoss · Answer

The standards that are set for women are bad but in a way the same standards are set for men but in different ways

Men or at least my opinion and experience don't prefer a curtain physical feature sure we find women with big boobs and but sexy but that's not what makes us atracted to them, for me I find people like Kim kardiashian and Nicki minaj extremely unattractive, personality of the girl really means something these days as lots of girls don't really have much at a personally I'm not targeting all women with that it's just a general observation

DairyCow · Answer

I don’t think it’s men putting that pressure on women. It’s media. It’s cliche but it’s true. Men don’t care too much, honestly.
We women think it is, then we take it out on men by placing impossible standards on them in return.

CaptainLegal · Answer

Honestly, every person has his/her own preferences, personally I like girls that with small butt and boobs that fit perfectly in your hand lol I mean not huge but not small either. But this would make me say,"eww I won't date this girl because she doesn't have this, she doesn't have that". Women also look out for men with the ideal butt, chest, abs, v shaped torso etc. We are basicaly the same, we look for women/men with body we like. If you are the type of person that says "oh come on it's the inside that matters not the outside" then you're an idiot. Yeah personality matters but say to an obese person that is more than 90 kgs that they are beautiful or you love them etc. A normal healthy person looks out for people that can take care of themselves.

mancatten · Answer

That's not true at all. I honestly don't care whether or not a girl has a big ass and big boobs. Don't get me wrong, i don't find it attractive if a girl is underweight, but she doesn't have to look like nicki minaj. Body wise, as long as a girl is a healthy weight, she should be fine and even if she's a bit overweight it's all good. When it comes to hair, i personally prefer long hair, but it really depends on the style and the girl herself. However, most girls look better with long hair. When it comes to height, most guys don't care much about it, though some guys might be a bit intimidated by a girl taller than themselves, though it depends on the guy.

lernulo · Answer

standards are stupid, the really important is what you can give, and to ask for what you really need.

Obviusly, if you go for the leader of the soccer team, you must have the standard, but... are you sure he has what you need?

On my opinion, you should worry less for what stupid men think and say, and worry more for what real men ussually aks for:

Feelings, thoughts, flexibility with his hobbies...

And above all, to have clear what you are going to ask him. It will filter "stupid monkey" opinions like the one you quoted.

bearshark95 · Answer

Any guy to say otherwise is a prick pretending to have higher standards. I see a ton of these online, and that's all they ever amount to.

The way I see it, women just choose to be anxious about their looks. Nobody expects you to be a Victoria Secret model. It's the peek of physical attractiveness, not the standard (something I'll never understand).

I also don't see how it's the way most people think about guys. Sure, a "good personality" well get you through relationships, but it's not like women turn their heads twice unless you're 8 and above. Looks are the first thing you see, so it's not like you'll see a guy's personality just through his looks. And why would you bother if he just looks average?

dma1989 · Answer

There's inherently high physical standards for both genders, but women are under FAR much more scrutiny in the media, especially celebrities who are caught without make up or who are having a bad hair day, etc...

However, looking at semi-unattainable goals for both men and women? You just need to look at magazines like Cosmopolitan and Men's Health, adverts for health supplements, things like Beachbody etc...

The post in question that you saw isn't just awful for the person the post is about, but highly damaging for anyone with self confidence or body confidence issues.

Ultimately? If we all learn to love the bodies were in, but find that balance between body confidence and 'loving who were are even if it's a danger to our ongoing physical or mental health'

Travis247 · Answer

That's a rather one sided view there sweety. Being a man at my age I've known many shalow women who would verry easily leave their current man for one who more meets their standards of what they feel is hott. Here they are: Lean muscles (Abbs typicly), Intelligent social demeanor, expensive high pay grade clothing /vehicle / home, Personal confidence in one's self and life style... You ladies judge us all the same sweety. And that doesn't even always just pertain to the more desirable women either.

Anonymous · Answer

I'd say men care more than women do in general, at least for relationships (for hookups women are able to be picky, while men are not). However, the standard for men to actually be considered hot is higher. You might think every guy want sthe same female body type, and it's not true. As many guys think emma Watson's body is amazing as think cardi B is amazing. Skinny girls and slim but curvy all have masses of fans.

By contrast, the vast majority of women like sub 10% body fat but more muscular than average which is both an unusual combination and pretty much unnatural.

Anonymous · Answer

I think there is a high standard for both genders. I mean for us men you can't have any fat either, you have to have nicely keep hair, if you have a beard it can't be to long or too short. You should not only be fit but a bit muscular too, and got to dress nice. Another big one that you hear a lot is a guy has to be tall.

So it's true for both genders. I think guys want a girl to look like that because we are very visually stimulated especially sexually. We want a girl like that since those what we find attractive. So if women are allowed to have a preference in what they find attractive then so are men.

So it goes both ways. Not just something women deal with.

KpopPrincess4Life · Answer

That is a double edged sword. We put men through the same wringer as they do us. This society has programmed us to think that if we don't look a certain way we're ugly.

As I can tell, people have become so judgmental that it makes me (and all the non judgmental people of the world) sick

Chiral · Answer

The same reason there's a high financial and status standard for men that doesn't apply to women. Men are expected to be financially secure, have a car, property and career prospects. Or, if not, they have to have high status among other males such as being someone who is respected and has power of a type eg in gang culture. None of this applies to women.

buttercupshero · Answer

Honesty is the best policy here. For years men have made it clear what we are attracted to and with a few minor changes it's remained relatively the same.

Women on the other hand are not so clear. You have the same set standards. Perfect example is the resent report that the dad bod is the most attractive to women. If women have higher standards, men will try to meet them.

handsomedevil_78 · Answer

Sorry but im gay and in the gay world six packs are mandatory or else you are considered fat. True story so i have no clue what to say to you. And gay guys think that way cause they are assholes. Probably goes for straight guys too. So the trick is not to play into those beliefs and to encourage healthy body habits. I have to say its woman who tend to make the shaming worse by agreeing to it, starting the topic, or just by staying silent. See honestly guys turn deer in headlights or for simplicity sake they turn stupid around the opposite sex well straight guys do (gay guys same around other guys) and at that point anything can come spewing out of their mouths. So just heed my warning expect the worst and hope for the best. The difference is the fact that you women fight this war on 2 fronts from both genders or sexes. Guys primarily only hear it from bullies mostly guys so they tend not to understand just how much more you hear it.

JoesCuriousBrain · Answer

I shame women for "not having what they want..." MY money and security. No on a serious note no. None of that, your mind is tainted. Boobs are nice everybody loves boobs it's a 100% fact guys AND girls. As long as you have them we're happy and having a cute face automatically gives you a nice and perfect ass. But also no men CAN'T look however they want bc if they dress like a scrub it says "I don't have a butt load of money" which is the biggest turnoff for all females. Want girls? = dress like you got money

Question_Everything · Answer

There are physical standards for both sex. I believe it's attributed to what we consider as "beautiful".

It goes into our media, entertainment, porn, movies, soap operas, etc. We grow up thinking this is what it is supposed to be, we must find someone that matches or mirrors these characteristics.

In a sense your permise isn't entirely off, but it's a bit of a general. Generally those are attributes that are "deemed" to be beautiful. However, I know some guys that don't care and just want a pretty face, or a good cook. While some girls want a model and others don't. It's both relative, and circumstantial.

allytootsieroll · Answer

its very sad... I myself dont have big boobs but I'm comfortable with it and I love it. I dont have to worry about running, or jumping, back pains, etc. It's just what I have and I dont feel bad about having it until people start to expect for you to be perfect

cavmanier · Answer

Overall, women tend to be more picky than men.  And the women on average seem to find men on average less attractive than conversely.

kiara23 · Answer

Because men still subconsciously think they are above women and think they deserve them no matter what. The media doesn't make it any better airbrushing and sculpting the perfect woman to be slim and beautiful with big butts and boobs. Women are often portrayed as sex objects so there are high standards to please all men with their looks

BreakingSound · Answer

I don't think that men can just "look however they want" without any negative repercussions. I think a lot of guys have similar body issues to women.

MsShahad · Answer

I agree, the post is disgusting. Although, the person who posted it probably meant it as a joke. I think it goes both ways as far as physical standards go. No one has it better than anyone. I think that the reason why you decided to post this, is because you were so triggered by this one post you saw that you didn't think about the idea thoroughly.

zulfiqarali · Answer

These standards are not set my men but by women their selves. women want to attract men towards them and want to be praised for their beauty. That's why women do efforts to make themselves more beautiful and do stuff that men like. On other hand men also do stuff like this to attract women like body building, working on their looks. so it is not only for women. However, its in nature of women to think and care about their beauty and they love to look great...

jaidee · Answer

Bullshit. Any ugly whale on tinder can get laid with 500 men.
Any average looking guy will have to work hard to get matches, then work hard to get the conversation turning into a phone call or date.

Men's looks matter less than their other traits and if they fail, they get no relationship at all.

Women's looks matter more than their other traits but if they fail, they still get a relationship, just with a lower quality man.

Nerverland · Answer

Historically women were possession of men, if they had beautiful women at their side it was a sign of wealth. Nowadays women are just more advertise then men. I think that men are not ALL putting the pressure , we are looking up to ads and putting pressure on ourselves because if we were really confident wouldn't care about what they're saying or standards, everybody is gonna have a opinion, we have to learn to don't care.

Graydon · Answer

First off all body means nothing to me. Personality is all that really matters. If I love the girl for her personality than I’ll love her for her looks as well. There is a high physical standard for us guys too because most girls want flat chest and abs which I am no where close to. I’ve always been so insecure about myself and my body weight. I just want the perfect girl to tell me in person that she loves my body and maybe I’ll try to stop worrying so much about what I eat.

EmmaElaine2000 · Answer

Bull I workout 6 days a week for an hour and don't ingest any unnecessary sugar I don't eat red meet and pork I don't even think about it I'm waxed from the neck down and spend sooooooomuch time on taking care of my skin hair and every other part of my body that any guy I date has to put in at least half of the effort i do on themself or it's a solid no from me

CreativeUsernameV2 · Answer

To be honest, any person who shames another for how they look is never ok. With conversations I've had with my friends, we all have different types and "body types" of women we are attracted to. Being skinny (not skin and bones) or being toned, shows healthiness and that you take care of yourself. The same goes for men. That's why that's usually the body type shown as "ideal". But that doesn't mean it's Ideal for you. For someone to look like the models on tv and magazines, you need to have strict diets and strict workout regiments. Sometimes it's even unhealthy to have as little body fat that they have. Don't let the media or fuckboys choose how you should feel about you. You're perfect the way you are and perfect the way you will be. Always remember that 😊

rojoMimujer · Answer

That is simply the popular opinion. Each man and each woman is unique. We also each have unique tastes. For instance, some of my buddies like girls with big booties and don't mind lots of fat. I for one am a big fan of almost all women. It just depends. You can't allow this topic to keep you from dating, just because one man isn't attracted to you does not mean others won't be. And never listen or believe what you hear and see on TV or movies. It's all fiction.

Also, personality. Smile. Be humble and kind to others. We are all in this world together, so we gotta make the best of it.

All the best,
JC

JaseScott0473 · Answer

Well I can only give you my opinion. I feel the same as you do when it comes to me with girls. I feel as though I must look a certain way to even get a girl's attention. I do not have the six pack abs, the bulging muscles, the super high paying job, the perfect
5 o'clock shadow, or the biggest package.

I believe that no matter the size of a woman's boobs, the roundness of her butt, or any other thing. What I believe is that there is someone out there for everyone, sometimes we all look in the wrong places. It's not about how you make them feel, what it comes down to is how you make yourself look and feel. Each person can do something for themselves.

hotguy24 · Answer

I guess it's roots lies in old social culture. For instance , in old times the soul duty of men is to go out, fight wars, bring food for the family while duty of women is yo just stay at home and take care of everyone else.
So, because of no socially productive chores all they got judged are on the basis of there looks. Now women's are getting equal to men in every field but this old thing is still somewhere. This blame is also shared by fashion models and beauty products companies and their potryal of women but there is a reason they do it on first place.

nihility · Answer

I disagree. While I understand your point and sympathize, society itself has created a "standard of beauty" for all genders. You say there isn't a high physical standard for men but there most certainly is. That chiseled jaw, six pack abs, firm rounded buttocks, nicely shaped and trimmed beard, "masculine and manly" look that is simply unattainable for average Joe's like myself is what society has deemed to be the "perfect" male form. It's obscene to all genders. However, I think that you'll find many men (and women and all genders between, beside, and beyond) don't find the standard you're describing to be very appealing. If you need an example, just look at any of models on the runway during Paris's fashion week. I think it will be rather eye opening for you.

XOXOME16 · Answer

1st of all, the post you mentioned was hilarious and probably a joke. 2nd, no matter the sex, people have standards. there are shallow women as well as men. Everyone likes different things. Not all guys like long hair or short girls or every other thing you mentioned. You're literally making an assumption based few opinions

ScarletMan · Answer

Simply genetics influencing culture.

The primary genetic purpose of females is to birth and raise a healthy child.

The primary genetic purpose of males is to provide resources for a family.

These facts direct the evolution of culture and explain why men seek physically attractive women, i. e. women with healthy features conducive to child bearing.

And it explains why women seek traits conducive to productive, successful men, such as confidence and charisma, in addition to genetic health markers.

G_E97 · Answer

Guys dont always have the same preferences. But that standard works both ways. There are also women that look however they want and expect a nice man with toned muscles taller than 6 feet with a college degree and a bank account that looks like an out of state phone number. My point though is that everyone is different and you can't make accurate generalizations about either sex.

Juver · Answer

Your "doubt" is just a passive aggressive complain, the two sex have high standards, you can not blame the entire collective of men just because you saw a machist essay in a magazine. Men "have to be" tall, handsome, with a six pack (would love if was a beer six pack), charming, outgoing... There isn't a prototype of woman that all men like, the things you listed aren't what I look or want in a woman, these are just a superficial "qualities".

Iboji · Answer

I feel like you are saying, ugly guys have the nerve to judge girls and it doesn't seem right. So implying ugly girls don't ever judge guys. Which is not very accurate from my experience. First off you are judging the judge. Every person is different, regardless of how or what YOU think is beauty, might be bunk to someone else. People, like buttholes, are always going to have opinions.
How they go about expressing those opinions speaks volumes about who that person is and nothing about what they look like. in my opinion

636314 · Answer

Because we are too busy getting judged by how successful and manly we are. Men also get judged physically, but in general women seem to be more concerned with how much money we make, or what we can provide for them. So it's not like men aren't judged, it's just on different things.

Men judge a woman by how attractive she is because that is what we look for. We don't care if you have a job, or what you can provide for us.

justgreg87 · Answer

Fuck societies standards. Also men get body shamed all the time. Too skinny, too fat, not muscular enough. Too short. To dark, too pale. The fact of the matter is everyone is different and i promise you that someone is going to find you sexy as hell. There are all sorts of people who like all sorts of things. So this question is shit. Because its only shitty people who think this way.

zagor · Answer

WTF are you talking about? Have you been living in a cave? Men are supposed to be tall, fit, able to lift cars off accident victims, able to fix everything from plumbing problems to computers.

And by the way, if you read the polls on here you would have noticed that a LOT of men are NOT into big boobs and big butts, and many like tall and/or short women.

TheShyPrep · Answer

Not true. I, and a lot of other men, like skinny with whatever size breasts you have to come with, as long as you're perky, it's all good. Literally all you have to do is watch what you eat to look good. MEN on the other hand, not only have to watch what we eat, but have to work out a lot, and not pussy ass cardio shit, work out for GAINS BRAAAAh. Quit your whining, the guy who said that was literally just trying to be funny at someone else's expense, don't peg that on all of us

Aki6000 · Answer

So you saw this one post made by an idiot and you decided that it is only women who feel the pressure when it comes to looks? Are you saying women don't demand similarly strict appearances with men? This stuff happens on both sides so I don't know why you're complaining.

navyrobin · Answer

There are standards for both.

Women- good looks and being “feminine and delicate” (total bs)

Men- good job and being “masculine and strong” (also total bs)

I think what we need is establish standards for PEOPLE as a whole, whether they’re men or women. I think we need to:

1. Respect everyone
2. Respect ourselves
3. Take care of our health
4. Take care of our loved ones.

These 4 things are gender neutral.

ColoradoKid · Answer

If the woman has a great attitude towards me that is what I look for the most. I don't look down on any one. I don't stand for people who look down on me. The person or people who do look down on others have no room in my life. Who is actually better than anyone else?

dolemite68 · Answer

I don’t see why women complain that all they have to do is be pretty. Guys are held to high standards for everything else. We gotta make good money, be funny and charming, talk right, be good in bed, and the list goes on. The prettier the girl the more likely she’s just a lazy bum and that’s all she has to do to get guy 🙄

ALPHALONEWOLF · Answer

Why men need to be tall and muscular
Specially tall...
Why men get judged Becuase of that
Why girls get more help from collegues at work then guys get...

You dating guys who need girls with big boobs and etc etc and disappointing and judging yourself...

Men care about themselves
We do not want to look fat its matter to us...

You don't know about our story ( guys )
And problem we face...

shinkson47 · Answer

And we aren't pressured to be healthy and muscular and strong and manly and sexy in just the same way? Whilst I agree, it is more district for you it does fall onto everybody. Society is messed up, we are encouraged to be themselves - but only if we fit into a pre defined mold of what is considered acceptable. It's stupid, just be you, and if people don't love you when you're you, then they don't really love you :)

chop123 · Answer

I don't know which country your talking about and off course each culture has it is privacy, but from my experience in Australia, women have high standards too, and trust me if you looking for casual encounters looks. are your bet whether it' for men and women.
And to be honest , I really disgrace the one who put so much weight on the look ( you can get a model for 500 $ , and you will not suffer the afterwards drama). But if you are looking for a intellectual and caring partner, then that's something you cannot buy with the all money on the earth.
At the end it's our choice to be shallow or deep

Why is there such a high physical standard for women, but not men? (Page 2)

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