Would you give someone a second chance if the first date doesn't go well?

[Logorithim]

Doesn't go well, but isn't an absolute disaster.

Yes

No

[StingRayxoxo]

Yes, it may be worth a second try.
I went on one date and was very nervous and my date chalked it up to incompatibility, and told me he wasn’t interested in going out again. I was a little disappointed because I would have responded differently.

[StingRayxoxo]

Thanks for MHO.

[maxwell77]

You definitely deserve better than that, if a guy will give up that soon you're better off without him!!

[maxwell77]

So yes I'd give someone a second chance

[StingRayxoxo]

@maxwell77 Thank you for saying that. I realize though that people don’t want to waste time but I’m more understanding of other factors and more likely to give a second chance.
He did ask me out again about a week later but at that point, I felt like a backup option so at that point, I didn’t give a second chance.

[MasterKey18]

Many times, round two.

[Logorithim]

Good that you have an open mind, when it's warranted.

[MasterKey18]

Haha Open mind is always appreciated.

[MasterKey18]

Thanks heaps!

[sjoes006]

But were the first dates actual disasters? I mean, I did many two and done dates, the first date might not have hit it out of the park but there’s still something undecided or potential.

I guess maybe that’s the asker’s point? @asker if you would have said didn’t go “so well” as opposed to just not going well, for me and my bias it changes the framing a little.

I’ve had two bad first dates where I would never want to see the guy again.

I had another first date to which I purposely wore an expensive skirt that was pleated and down past my knees so that he couldn’t see my figure. The top was fitted but I looked like I was going to a country club he later told me.

I did it because I was in incredibly good shape and didn't want that to be a focal point as it ruined other dates.

He walked me to my car, we had to same European car down to details and year. Suddenly it all made sense and we were kissing. Each date got better.

[Myk13]

Anything can happen to anybody at anytime. Second, maybe third chances too. Depends on how much I’m interested.

[NYCQuestions1976]

Yes, unless it didn't go well for unreasonable reasons.

[NYCQuestions1976]

Thanks for Most Helpful.

[OlderAndWiser]

Assuming that there were no warning signs and that I felt some positive feelings towards her (physical attraction, respect, and she has some intelligence,) I would give it a second chance. Maybe it was just a bad day for one or both of us.

[Pinay_ako]

Yes I will if I still like him and wants to know him more. First impressions are not always the last

[Apope16]

Yes but only if I was sexually attracted to them physically.

[sjoes006]

Yes in cases where it is maybe just shy and awkward to the point of where I can’t even get a feel for if we have chemistry.

It’s been a long while for me since I have had a first date, but when I did they usually went well. Second dates are where the flop usually happened if it was going to.

The few first dates that didn’t lead to a second, we both left knowing there was no potential and we’re fine with that. They were usually fun enough and not a waste of time, by you know there isn’t a click.

Worst mistake for me to learn was the combo of good first date, questionable second date then accepting a third date. Those few third dates went wrong in ways that I thought they would.

Second dates are key. Not like you can give up and poo with the door open after that. But if you are both presenting honestly and make it through 2 dates the 3rd is where you can start exploring a regular dating schedule.

[TarrAva]

There are multiple reasons why a first date can go wrong and it would not be correct to judge this person solely on what went wrong.

He/she could have been nervous because it was his/her first date ever or was suffering from a cold/flu. So many things can go wrong that you can barely influence.

While first impressions are usually right, there are occasions where a 2nd or even 3rd impression is necessary.

You may miss out on the most fantastic relation ever if you don't give your date a 2nd or 3rd chance and see how those evolve compared to the first one. Only then would I make up my mind and decide if I want to go ahead with this person.

[Jesslin412]

I was so nervous our first date I couldn’t talk. He though I was not infested! I thought he was bored. He was headed straight to drop me off when I asked if we could ride around a little while. That changed the night and welcomed date #2. We are now engaged!!

[Logorithim]

Good effort and well done!

[Jesslin412]

Interested not infested lol

[Browneye57]

What exactly does 'doesn't go well' mean to YOU?

She burped?
Told you you were a MF?
You slammed her finger in the door?
Didn't have enough to talk about?

I mean really, what does this mean? The whole reason for dating is to discern, to judge whether they're a match, whether they're worthy. The more you do it the better you get at it. Most people lack sufficient experience to even be able to make a determination, and then down the road they whine about how or what that person is.

Guys get with girls hoping they'll never change.
Girls get with guys thinking if they can work on them some they just MIGHT be someone they could stand to be around. FAIL :)

[Logorithim]

There's no way I could address all possible permutations here, but the first three things you mentioned would, I assume, prevent consideration of a second date. The fourth one, along with nervousness, is the most likely scenario here for even considering a second one.

It's certainly true that guys think women won't change.

[FlyingHorses]

It depends on why it doesn't go well! If it's just coz nerves got in the way and I really really liked them before and they have a lot of the things I'm looking for in a partner then probably, yes! In my experience though it mostly doesn't go well because they've done something major to put me off or its obvious they'd lied to me about something! Those things I couldn't overlook!

[Felinegirl]

Depends on how. Sometimes, the date can be alright but you still notice a lot of incompatibilities. If I'm sure it's not going to work out, I won't go on a second date as it would only feel like leading them on for nothing.

If the first date is just a bit awkward and I haven't really gotten to know the other one way or another, it's definitely worth a second date.

[sawno]

I have no idea what to vote in this, i do not give a verdict based on the date but based on who they are. So if i like her as a person she will not need a second chance to begin with even if the date went poorly as ill happily go on another hopefully more successful date. However if our personalities do not align a second chance won't fix it. I am very good at reading people in those regards so after one date well or not i should have a reasonable impression of how she is and if there is a basis for more even if she acted clumsey, shy or found it difficult to talk during most of it.

[Nita2585]

Depends.
If the guy is just shy, inexperienced, too emotional, i mean something i would forgive, yes i would give the second chance.
Unforgivable manner is when the guy is arrogant, self centred, talkative, stubborn... Then No, not a second chance

[vonasaurus]

i voted yes, though it really depends on what your definition of 'didn't go well' is.

ie: if he forgot his wallet and i had to pay his share of the bill, i'd be fairly forgiving. if he forgot about the date completely, then no.

[Logorithim]

Oh, yeah, standing someone up is a complete fail and an automatic dealbreaker.

[MementoMori_]

I haven't had many dates that didn't go well because I don't ask someone out unless I am really attracted to her in the first place... so by the time we go on a "date," I already know what to expect. But if I did have one that didn't go well, and she wanted another one, I guess it would depend on who is paying.

[MrMilti]

I think it is absolutely stupid, to believe to understand someones personality after only one single date.

People are complex creatures. How can anyone think to have a perfect understanding of someone, after spending a few hours with said person? Thats bullshit.

[DocilexElle]

I gave the guy a second chance... a WHOLE year later! It lasted about 4 weeks. Maybe my gut was right from the jump.

[Logorithim]

That was awfully nice of you. How did that come about?

[DocilexElle]

Well, he hit me up one day out of the blue last year and I was like... sure... six months since I was with anyone, why not? Though it didn't last that long... I ended up finding my friends with benefits a few months after this. Glad I got the courage to get back into the dating game <3 !

[itsarapp]

My fiancé and I had a horrible first date where we went for a walk, it rained a lot and we were both kinda miserable but now over a year later we are getting married in a few months so I say always give a couple dates to decide whether you want to continue in the relationship or not.

[Answermyquestions31]

I think yes because first dates and meetings are filled with so many nerves. It takes a few times hanging out to be comfortable. That’s why I opt for hanging as friends first then go on a date.

[Logorithim]

You're not worried about a guy assuming he's friendzoned and trying to meet other girls as a result?

[Answermyquestions31]

If you’re open with the guy about let’s hangout as friends a few times to see how we vibe and slowly move into the love dating stuff

[Answermyquestions31]

And everyone lives their own lives. I can’t stop someone from meeting someone who could be a better fit. Like we’re all adults here.

[Logorithim]

If that works for you, great, but I have never done it like that. I can usually tell pretty quickly if she is girlfriend material for me.

[Answermyquestions31]

Yeah but most of the time men paint a really pretty picture only to rip it up when they change their mind. It’s better to go about things the way I explained instead of making decisions open to change.
This way no one gets hurt. Do you understand?

[Logorithim]

Whatever works for you.

[Answermyquestions31]

I haven’t tried doing this but going forward I’m going to do this. Because from what I gathered the guys I dated after hanging out with them a few times went so much better than the ones who I went straight into dating and hooking up. Friendship based relationships work so well. Lust and attraction runs out.

[Logorithim]

I can tell pretty quickly if a woman is interesting and girlfriend material, plus, in my experience, there is too much physical attraction to pretend to be friends, and it was always understood between us that we were considering each other as a potential partner for an exclusive relationship.

[Wowgirl10q]

Stop it they scare me already
Depends how bad?
Is he is just awkward and nervous yes
If he smells or brings out drugs no

[Logorithim]

Drugs or bad hygiene would be a disaster and that should be it, but if the guy is nervous and awkward, maybe a girl should give him another shot at a venue where he is more comfortable.

[Wowgirl10q]

Absolutely agree

[dazbit72]

Deffo. Some people are just nervous

[CassieIsTrans]

If I like them, and I think that it was mainly circumstances rather than my date themselves causing problems, then yes, I would go on a second date. If what went wrong indicates to me that they aren't right for me, then no, I will not.

[VIVANT]

Yes three no way I can comfortably be myself upon one date, so i understand and I’d def give another go if they wanted.

I think it’s unrealistic to make a decision on a person from the one meeting/ why I hate dating lol

[VIVANT]

There is no way *