Do all men cheat given the opportunity?

[Anonymous]

If given opportunity, if your dream girl came to you and your wife or girlfriend didn't find out. Would you cheat?

(Tbh, my dad cheated on my mom and I feel like I'll never find a decent man. I saw how it destroyed my mom and my mom said that men would cheat.) Will I ever find a decent man?

Updates

+1 y

All these guys saying they wouldn't cheat if the hottest girl gave them attention, oh please. Youd drop your girlfriend or wife like a hot potato.

Updates

+1 y

I'm just afraid I'll never find a decent man..

[btbc92]

Well that applies to everybody, not one sex or gender. Everybody has a opportunity to cheat, even you. The point has to do with intentions, reasons, views, values and upbringing.

Just like the Sims games. There are faithful people who end up cheating in some way, form or another. Whether intentionally or not, we each have a choice and feels temptation most of the time IF in the right setting and stage of being. Meaning, for example, the Word of God tells us in 1 Corinthians 7 and this is me paraphrazing, that it's wise for men not to touch a woman, in most translations. Meaning sexually. But, since there is so much sexual immorality (premarital sex of any kind, homosexual sex, extra marital sex, polygamy, anything not between a husband and wife basically) let EVERY man have his own wife, and let EVERY woman have her own husband. Mind you, this is permission to get married to whoever you desire a sexual relations lifestyle with (granted your a virgin before then). In a marriage, you are expected to have sex with your spouse. I will not get into too much detail about scripture. But the major problem is is that people choose to do whatever it is they want to do. And regardless if anybody finds what is written religious or not, we do have certain guidelines concerning how we are owed to treat each other. Otherwise what was the point of teaching young children to be kind to one another If all we're going to do is allow bullying to continue?

For these reasons, people cheat because something cause them to have this expectation and to entitlement two things they may or may not actually be entitled to or are simply lacking. The world is going to deviate from God's ways concerning such relationships, and what can people really expect since this is technically Human Nature? Not all men cheat, just like not all women who get the divorce simply do it just for the resources of men. It's about why they do what they do, and understand it thoroughly without immediate judgment for it leads to much ignorance. It is easy to call somebody a scumbag for cheating, but it's another to call out every cheater one simply because you hate cheaters out of biases. Becaus snow what's going to happen if you God forbid cheat? That's what I question people. No amount of cheating is acceptable. But we can't afford to be in ignorance other without getting to the root of the problem with such people. For an example, you may dislike yiu r father for cheating on your mother. But who is to say that it wasn't your mother who may have drive him to do so, be it right or wrong? Your mother did marry him. After all, so she should know him best since she was his sexual partner. Nobody really knows what went on in the bedroom. You won't know the truth if you allow yourself to pick sides base on emotional connection. You won't know unless you ask him, why did he do it without judgement. And reading the bible has helped me gain futher undertanding on that subject.

[btbc92]

Asker, you cannot judge them as we cannot judge you or your parents. You feel bitterness because of what your father did. But as I said before, who knows what she may have done to drive him to that point. Men don't always have to have reasons to cheat. But many women do as it is our nature to question and inquire before we step into that lifestyle, BEFORE it god forbid becomes the life we like. If they say no, at least trust that they wouldn't. You owe it to yourself to have the relationship you want. But if you're having premarital sex and or is too emotionally invested and intimate, it can get worse. So the rule of thumb is if you're not going to wait for marriage to do all of those things, be mindful who you lay with.

[btbc92]

Most women like me are afraid. But decent men don't fall from the sky either. You have to show that your WORTH the commitment and believe that you are. And eventually will find that in the most unlikely of places. Just be mindful that sometimes it may not come from the type of guys you want. But whom you NEED.

[XRabbitHeartX]

Nope. Not all men cheat. It has nothing to do with gender but everything to do with your integrity and morals/values.

[BadApple1]

Hate to say it but not just men, women cheat just as much if not more. The real problem as I see it is “the selfish gene” (actually a book title). Women want (even though they might not realize it) to mate with the biggest strongest male they can find. That’s in the genes. The species wants offspring that can survive. This is part of our animal brains. It sucks I know from personal experience... it really sucks. Now for men... our wonderful animal brains wants us to spread our genes as much as possible. Basically sleep with as many woman as we can. This is what our civilized brains fight with daily. Interesting proof of this, a study done with a couple that were living together. They checked the sperm count of the man regularly. When the woman would go out of town for a day or two when she got back the man’s sperm count was one and a half times what it normally was. The reason for this was (the animal brain again) if she had sex with someone while away her bf’s sperm count greatly increased to counter the other males sperm. We are so greatly controlled by animal part of the brain and don’t even know it. Hate to sound all doom and gloom... just make you aware there is more to it then just a man cheating. As a girlfriend or wife you need to know this. Find a respectable boyfriend and talk openly and know sometimes crap happens. I was cheated on... ultimately I forgave my wife after long talks and many tears. Life is never all cupcakes and unicorns but that doesn’t mean we can’t have cupcakes and unicorns from time to time. Just as a footnote... it’s been 7 years since my wife cheated and we are doing great. She learned from the mistake and I know that there is always a chance it will happen again. But right now... I am enjoying my cupcake :)

[Anonymous]

I sincerely believe that the one reason all men cheat is because they feel more respected by the woman they're cheating with than they do by the woman they're dating or have married. If you treat your man with an unconditional respect, he will never abandon you and he will work to make himself worthy of that respect. No man would ever cheat if they had to choose between the hottest model on the planet who didn't respect them when compared to the ugliest woman on the planet who had nothing but the utmost respect for them. Men are disgusted far more with a lack of respect than they are with a lack of figure or curves. A woman could likely get almost any man she liked if she were willing to show him more respect than his wife or partner. However, even then there are a select few men who, even then, would continue to love and stay true to their wives.

Basically... respect means everything to a man. If you don't have any respect for him then... yeah he's probably gonna cheat on you. So then... assume the best of him and treat him with respect BEFORE he's earned it, and he WILL live up to it as time goes on.

[BluesheepOwl]

You've never seen love island have you?

[Opinion Owner]

@BluesheepOwl Correct, but I'm sure because it's a movie it is a great source of relationship knowledge and understanding.

[BluesheepOwl]

Its a British tv show actually

[Opinion Owner]

@BluesheepOwl Huh, well I'm happy for it :)

[witherwing]

What do you think? Do ALL men do anything as a whole? No they don't, and you know it.

[jennifer_bloom]

They don't cheat if they care more about their emotional connection than they do about the physical beauty of the woman.

[EyeAmNiceGirl]

Of course not. The tact about opportunities is basically this: The "opportunity" simply means that guys who have no opportunity, obviously can't cheat. So, all an opportunity does is give the guy a chance to cheat. Same goes for a gal. Bottom line is that, if the opportunity presents itself, sometimes a guy will cheat, sometimes a gal will cheat. If a guy is totally into the gal he is dating/married to, then he won't cheat. If he isn't totally into the gal, then he might cheat if the opportunity comes along.

[hellionthesagereborn]

Your mom is saying that because she is angry, no not all men cheat. In fact they are about as likely to cheat as women are. Also according to surveys men don't cheat because they love the other woman, they cheat because they are not getting something they need from the relationship and they for what ever reason think that if they can fill that void some where else they will be able to maintain their primary relationship (for instance 30% of marriages are sexless, so some men may go out and cheat in order to get sex but that is all it is for them, they still want that main relationship but they feel like they cannot communicate or solve the problem by talking it out for what ever reason). Now that doesn't excuse the behavior at all, cheating is scummy and their is no reason for it because you either talk to your partner and find a solution to the problem or you leave. But all that being said, no most men will not cheat.

[Asker]

Well a girl on here said most of the time guys will do that. So now I'm worried about it...

[Asker]

I'm afraid I won't ever find a decent guy..

[hellionthesagereborn]

I've never cheated, I don't do causal sex either. Out of every one I know one guy cheated (horribly disfunctional relationship and he was trying to hold onto it while trying to find happiness outside of it. Again, not condoning it just stating what the rational was (he was not strong enough to end it when he should have), two women did as well (My cousins wife who cheated on him and abandoned him and their daughter with an ex con (he allowed her back because he wanted his daughter to have a mother. She cheated and abandoned them both again. The other was a coworker, his wife cheated on him and now he is raising a little girl that isn't his (he has to stare her infidelity in the face every single day, go to work to provide for the results of her infidelity and I hope treat the results of her infidelity like she was his own (because that little girl is as much a victim as he was, of his wife's betrayel). The fact is by that rational I could conclude its more likely for women to cheat, but I would be wrong. Bad people exist, people who are weak and do the wrong thing exist. That's unavoidable. But whats also unavoidable are good people, good people exist, people who are strong enough to do what is right even when others do what is wrong exist. You just need to find them, look at their behavior, etc. You want to know what happened, ask him why he did it. Not saying it justifies the behavior by any means but maybe their is a rational for it (again, if you look communication is key but if one party doesn't communicate then you have problems, maybe your mother didn't listen when he tried to communicate with her, maybe he was to afraid to truly express his needs and wants and that's why he did it. However it turns out you know what not to do and what to look for.). Obviously your going to feel this way for awhile (after hearing of the two incidents that I mentioned I felt the same way, but I knew that it was just a feeling and it was not reality).

[hellionthesagereborn]

Eventually however, you will realize that good men are still out their and in fact are far more common then the men who are not. Its just going to take some time.

[BrookieCookie0422]

What happens is women put a lot of pressure on men to act a certain way and do certain things within a relationship. Women also tend to not want to have sex as much as men do. That can be frustrating. I’m not saying that’s justifying men cheating on women because that’s wrong. But women can do more to make relationships a little more one sided. Girls need to give guys a break and realize that most men are the same way.

Men are simple creatures and tend to only thing about a few things most of the time. Their favorite activity (fishing, sports, etc.), boobs, and sex.

Don’t be mad at men for this. They are programmed to be this way. Men naturally want to have as much sex as possible and so this will happen when men are not satisfied in a relationship.

There are other factors of course but I’ve experienced that this is the biggest issue. Sex.

[ThisIsMyOpinion]

Sex isn't the issue. When I cheated when I was 16 and never again, I did it because she was being emotionally distant and the other girl wasn't. She gave me emotional support that the other didn't. We are more complicated than just sex.

[BrookieCookie0422]

@ThisIsMyOpinion that’s interesting. I’ve never met a guy who claims to need emotional support. Usually girls would be all over the emotional support thing.

Thanks for sharing this

[ThisIsMyOpinion]

Some guys do. One was there for me the other wasn't so...

[BrookieCookie0422]

@ThisIsMyOpinion I feel ya. Don’t let them drag you down

[ThisIsMyOpinion]

Oh I don't worry about that I already have my quality girl

[normalice]

It's not cheating if you break up with your girlfriend for it. That's just a break up.

But, honestly I probably wouldn't cheat. The hotter and more into my kinks a girl is, the more I would be suspicious that it's some kind of setup. It would take a great deal more explaining on her part to convince me it's not a setup than any girl is likely to tolerate - indeed, if she does seem to be tolerating giving explanations I would be even more suspicious, because there would be no reason for her to do that if she's willing to sleep with strangers.

And if a girl who approaches me is not hot or not into my kinks, then there would be no point in sleeping with her anyway. So, I'd be pretty much walled in from all directions in a relationship.

[lightbulb27]

no they don't. I know plenty who have not cheated and are committed even some with difficult women. Cheating is really something else going on. like, he's not committed in first place (erogance, ego), or the relationship has so much pain (drugs), power, who knows what.

It does though take some internal strength, awareness of self to deal though. Girls can wiggle their way in, are manipulative and they know how to bait a guy, I've seen them pull husbands away and the guy is not aware until it's years later. has nothing to do with intelligence but emotional and the status of the relationship. The problem being once married... know the woman they have is flawed, maybe stress. Along comes a wounded bird to save, or someone who seems perfect. It's easy to be sucked in, guy has to be on his game to deflect it. Ditto in reverse girls have to deflect players and men who bait them.

[starfyredragon]

I am a guy.
I have never cheated on a girl I was with. (I HAVE been cheated ON, however.)

Some humans cheat. Some humans don't cheat. Some humans have respect for the other humans i their lives, some humans do not. Sex and/or gender having nothing to do with whether they will cheat or not.

And in response to your update, No. If the hottest girl gave me attention, I wouldn't drop my spouse. Loyalty and companionship are WAY more important than 'being hot'. In fact, if a 'hot' girl wanted me to break up with my spouse, I'd find that personality downright ugly. And no body can make up for an ugly personality.

[Mnays]

I was dating with a girl for 2 years, we were really serious. She was maybe the deepest love I had. Once I was on a trip in Vienna, I was in bar. The receptionist girl came in after her shift was over. She was by physical look like a model, and very attractive plus tipsy. She tried to talk to me, I said why not, it's a simple chit chat. But after ten minutes I realised she wants to sleep with me. It was hard, my girlfriend would never find it out, I'd probably enjoy spending my night with her, but I thought about the fact that I'll be living with this cheating. I'll remember it, and I'll feel cheap. So I politely left her. I think about cheating it's all about integrity.

[Finchie40]

No, i dont commit to be single , I dont care how Hot she is i am not going to break my commitment for a piece of ass if that was the case i would bite an escort , looks dont mean shit , the heart is what matters. When i give myself to someone in a commitment i give myself completly , if i. didn't want to give them my heart i would stay single

[DedCriCri]

In my opinion, be humble and look for someone who is humble. You shouldn't lower your standards for men, but you also need to find someone whose standards aren't lowered for you. Cheating on someone is wrong, but it's easy especially if your relationship is boring or the love is no longer mutual. Not all men cheat, you just need to find someone for you, and that thinks you're perfect for them!

[OverShadowed]

No I don't think all men would cheat, I personally don't know if I would cheat I would like to think I wouldn't, but my dad who is one of my biggest role models cheated on my mum (despite that they are still quite happily married), so that shows even respectable men have downfalls. I don't think I would cheat because I don't think I would ever be put the position where someone would care enough to have a relationship with me in the first place, but I suppose my loneliness and self deprecation is beside the point.

[ThisIsMyOpinion]

You said I would cheat on my girl? Drop her like a hot potato?
Besides the fact that I would never be able to do that to her I want to let something clear here... What about my pride?
I think men lick the floor women walk on way too much! So if I cheat on my girl I would be letting myself get influenced by her women charm! I refuse to let that happen! As a men I have too much pride for that.
I would also be breaking a promisse I made to my girl? Is that all my word in worth now? Is that all I am worth? Nah!
I would lose my pride, my honour, my self respect and most importantly the love of the woman I asked to marry me!
I don't care if you got cheated on or your father cheated! Don't put us all in the same bag!

[GuidoThePizzaMaker]

I wouldn't
I turned down opportunities to cheat woth women who were hotter than my girlfriends

It's hard to find decent men nowadays. You need to be patient and put yourself on the right places. Church, work and community is where the good men are at

[GuidoThePizzaMaker]

In response to the update, i dont blame you for thinking that. I know most guys would probably succumb.

[Anonymous]

This is a good question and I read some of the guys comments. So are we suppose to just take your word for it bc any guy can say they won’t cheat but how will women really know? Are their any actions to prove it that a man wouldn’t cheat?

[Cammy137]

Women cheat as well. So ask yourself the same question and you'll find the answer.

[Opinion Owner]

@Cammy137 honestly I don't know and I would never do that’s why I wouldn’t know more and am asking...

[Opinion Owner]

I also never said that women didn’t cheat...,

[Asker]

This is a good answer anon, you make a good point.

[Cammy137]

So are men supposed to just takr your word for it? Thats the point im making

[Asker]

Yeah cause given the opportunity men will cheat. Its fact.

[Asker]

You know deep down true.

[Cammy137]

You're talking shite. Men and women both cheat. You're turning this into a gender issue when it isn't.

[Opinion Owner]

@Cammy137 no here’s what you’re not going to do. You’re not going to tell me what I’m doing or not doing okay you douche. Not that I have to explain myself to your idiot ass but I’m just freakin curious get the picture ! I think you do now F off

[Opinion Owner]

And this is if you are referring to me if you’re not then by all means have a good day or night

[Cammy137]

@Opinion Owner My first two responses were to you. The third one was to the Asker

[Cammy137]

I should have made that clearer

[Opinion Owner]

@Cammy137 okay I’m glad it wasn’t to me bc I don’t want to have to be rude like that and don’t want anyone to think I’m turning it around on men like that 😅

[Opinion Owner]

It’s okay you live and you learn :)

[Cammy137]

@OpinionOwner No, not at all. I understand that you're just sharing your opinion and I was interested to discuss that with you, until the @Asker started talking nonsense.

[ThisIsMyOpinion]

You said I would cheat on my girl? Drop her like a hot potato?
Besides the fact that I would never be able to do that to her I want to let something clear here... What about my pride?
I think men lick the floor women walk on way too much! So if I cheat on my girl I would be letting myself get influenced by her women charm! I refuse to let that happen! As a men I have too much pride for that.
I would also be breaking a promisse I made to my girl? Is that all my word in worth now? Is that all I am worth? Nah!
I would lose my pride, my honour, my self respect and most importantly the love of the woman I asked to marry me!
I don't care if you got cheated on or your father cheated! Don't put us all in the same bag!

[Opinion Owner]

@ThisIsMyOpinion I don’t mean to get involved but a word of advice, if your pride is too big it can ruin you’re love life for you and lots of girls can’t stand it when a guy even has a big ego or lots of pride

[ThisIsMyOpinion]

Don't worry about me in that department. I am going to get married in 3 months.
I am just saying my pride is another thing that prevents me from cheating

[Opinion Owner]

@ThisIsMyOpinion oh okay gotcha. That’s great! 👌

[ThisIsMyOpinion]

If that is you congratulating me for the wedding thanks 😊

[Opinion Owner]

@ThisIsMyOpinion yeah it is haha, you’re welcome😊. Are you nervous/excited?

[ThisIsMyOpinion]

Super excited! =D
nervous I will be on the day xD

[Opinion Owner]

@ThisIsMyOpinion that’s great news! Aww I’m sure you’ll get by it and feel a good kind if nervous. Well I wish you both a long happy, healthy life with each other with so many beautiful, funny memories 😊

[ThisIsMyOpinion]

Thank you so much!
You know I had a recent discussion with a guy here. He was 100% convinced women are incapable of living a man for who he is. They only use us for their convenience. They trick us and cheat us someday when they don't need us or find someone better.
In this question about cheating many women seem to think that men can't resist cheating!
So much hate between sexes all around!
Well I have no intention of cheating on my fiancee and I know she will not cheat on me either.
If for some impossible reason we don't work out that will not be the reason.

[Opinion Owner]

@ThisIsMyOpinion You’re welcome! Interesting conversation and not all women are like that just like all men aren’t cheaters, rapists, etc. Some guys just don’t know how to pick them or go to the right places to find the good ones. I suggest research be done in different places where he lives so that he has better chances of finding the nicer women who won’t make him feel like that or treat him like that. Maybe he has s certain type he keeps attracting to himself or falling for repeatedly. 🤔 I take your word for it even though it hopefully never comes down to you guys not working out. Yes lots of hatred between the sexes! I agree

[Opinion Owner]

Another thing I also just thought of is that he could be the one letting the girl get that idea of using him for when it’s convenient or is doing a lot for the girl with little to no limits that the girls he’s with get too use to it and try to take advantage.

[ThisIsMyOpinion]

I don't know what his story is and honestly I don't really care. It's stupid to assume an entire gender acts a certain way.

[Opinion Owner]

@ThisIsMyOpinion yeah I was just letting you know if you cared lol and yeah there’s no entire gender that acts a certain way.

[cavmanier]

I'd say around 50-75% of men would cheat, but they all have different thresholds of opportunity that needs to be meet first.

No I wouldn't cheat. I'm picky about who I'm with in general and if I'm with a partner, what we'd have is much more important than what cheating could provide.

I'd think you have to find a guy with the right mentality or morals. I'm not sure how hard that is for a woman.

[Asker]

That's a big number, the chances of me finding one of those 30 percent loyal guys is rare.

[cavmanier]

It's a complicated answer because I think some men need to be really angry combined with the right opportunity and some men would cheat given enough years together from boredom or lack of variety (maybe like your dad). I don't think women cheat that much less. Maybe they are 30-50%.

I don't find it easy to find a partner with the right attributes that feels the same about me and is single too lol. That's why it can take years or more.

[serious]

No, all men will not cheat. Some men are always loyal and will remain loyal because for them there is nothing more important than being a highly principled person, being a man of high morals and values and hence they will never cheat irrespective of situations/circumstances/reasons etc etc.

[BirdFan360]

Nope =-)
Tbh, i don't value sex that much. Yes, that makes me weird. I value personality more. That being said, I wouldn't marry anyone that is so suspicious of me, cause that would be exhausting quick. My heart wouldn't be able to take it. I'd only ever marry my dream girl. So I guess yes? I'd cheat on my wife with my wife? Somehow?

[Grobmate]

I have never cheated in my life. My honour holds true and I have never once considered it. I have been cheated on though. Blanket statements like those do nothing but openly advertise a bitter disposition, with an opinion easily refuted. You will find blanket statements are in abundance sadly. You are right to question it.

You will find a decent man, as there are many.

[Grobmate]

Update: If you beleive that these guys "who say they never have and wouldnt" would drop their wife or woman like a hot potato for some dream girl, I'm sorry you think so.

So, "oh please" learn more about men. They aren't all walking penises that lust outside of their relationship.

Men may be visual creatures, but we have a soul and when we love, we love hard. I hope you realise the absurdity of your statement. It's on the same level as declaring that all women would leave their husband or boyfriend for a billionaire.

In saying all that.. If you are generally worried you will never find a decent man then you have just cause. The reason it is a just cause, is because you have a predetermined and incontrovertible attitude towards Men. You have already written all men off, so why would they want to commit their time and energy on you? It's not them, it's you. Guess what? YOU and YOU ALONE have the power to change your point of view, and attitude. I recommend you do. Otherwise, you will find a decent man, who knows his own worth and he'll ride off into the sunset without you, or he'll say hell no and search for a woman worthy of him.

Your obsession searching for a precious stone will have only resulted in you missing the diamond who may have been right under your very nose.

I wish you luck.

[SlimeC0RE]

I wouldn’t cheat for a few reasons:

1 - I find it quite lacking in the morality department, and it brings more trouble than what it’s worth.
2 - I find the various sexual acts repulsive, and even if I acknowledge it’s necessity for the survival of our species, I wan’t no part in it.
3 - I wouldn’t be in a couple anyway, since I have no interest in love at all and can’t find it in myself to feel it for someone else.

In other words, I’m a moral and efficient (lazy) asexual.