Is smoking a deal breaker?

[Kupkake88]

Could you be in a committed relationship with a smoker if you don't smoke and vice versa?

Yes

No

[SueAnon84]

I care about my health and that includes getting exposed to second hand smoke. If they don't care about theirs, then why should I? I mean, I can and often do! In fact, I had previously dated (maybe out of desperation?) guys that smoked and vapped. It's a very tempting thing to do espeically if you want to be classified as cool! Also if you had started the ADDICTION already, if you're a person that doesn't have such good self control, then you'll be hooked in no time and it will be VERY HARD to stop the habit!

[witherwing]

I thought for the longest time it was. Falling in love with a smoker changed my mind. Although he is considerate with his smoking. He never smells of smoke and never smokes when I'm around. However, I used to date someone who's hair, mouth, clothes, apartment and everything smelled like cigarettes, and it was absolutely disgusting. I couldn't be with a person like that again.

[Aethereal]

I could, but I'd prefer that she didn't. Since I don't smoke, I'd either have to go with her, or stay by myself every time she pops out for a smoke. It's quite awkward if we're eating out or something. Even worse if we're with people and I'm the only non-smoker.
A plus for her is that I don't generally find the smell of smoke unpleasant (though some cheap brands are just nasty). So I'd probably go outside with her most times... and get me some of that healthy second-hand smoke :D

[Spiritwander]

Man, you would bring up the one topic that makes me feel most like a hypocrite... lol. I *hate* smoking, and I'm a chain smoker of well over 35 years... 😕
I want to quit, but it's not like the regular coffee and cigarettes smoked at the 12 Step programs is going to help with that... lol

It also doesn't help that, biologically, over decades, my body switched from a "normal" diet to a coffee & cigarettes one because it's all I could afford.

[AmandaYVR]

Wow, a lot of staunch no's here. Oh, how culture has changed. It happens in a flash.
My husband smoked when I met him, as did many people in and out of my life. I didn't kick him to the curb because of it. I accepted him and it. And he stopped on his own. I went through some hellish times last year and I started smoking a bit. He joined me. Now we're done. That's it. The world needs more acceptance and less judgement (you can see I'm not just talking about smoking.)

[OlderAndWiser]

Absolute, total deal breaker. If I know in advance, she would not even get a first date from me.

[Juaitem]

For you only, seems to be you are looking for someone who fits your standards and to judge him blindly before ever talk to him.. your looking for someone whom you accept, not vis verse..

[OlderAndWiser]

@Juaitem Yes, when you are screening people for a first date, you are determining whether they meet your standards. Some things are deal breakers, most things are not deal breakers. That's how it works.

[Juaitem]

No, judging the outer frame, or a bad habit without even contact to know whom you are talking to, is always a "forever alone path"..
What would you do, if she hide it for a while, then after you find out about smoking you are IN LOVE? Are you gonna push her away?
Or because of your feelings you're gonna try even to solve it or to live with it? We gooo back to zero.. it's all about letting yourself to accept things you don't like... not to put a standard code like your buying a robot with a restrict specifications..

[midnightmoon05]

@Juaitem I can not compromise my health over smoke.
I had one date, went well... then second date, found out he smokes. i as in his car and i started coughing and whezzing... so yes, some things are deal breakers...

[OlderAndWiser]

@Juaitem If you want whoever comes along regardless of her habits, education, behavior, etc., you are free to do whatever you want. Most people do not date in that fashion; they have some minimum standards, there are some deal breakers, and not everyone gets a first date. That's the way the rest of the world operates.

[Juaitem]

@OlderAndWiser also don't deniy the fact that no body is perfect, even you, if you snore! shall she wake away and leave you? Or buy a 2$ device is better?

[Juaitem]

Sorry to tell you this: you know nothing about the rest of the world, you judge upon your smaaaaaall examples..

[Juaitem]

I didn't say that i want whoever comes to me.. no.. definitely not.. but because you said you'll not allow the date to start even.. you saw only one bad habit, maybe she has a billion beautiful and worthy habits in her.. this is my point..

[OlderAndWiser]

@Juaitem Okay. I'll send all the smokers your way.

[Juaitem]

I don't like somkers, but it's better if you see the good things before denying everything, then you can change the smoking habit or decrease it o limit it or live with it..

[OlderAndWiser]

@Juaitem Start dating a smoker then tell her that she must change for you. Get back to me in a few months and tell me how that worked out.

[Juaitem]

If i find three beautiful habits in her, I'll ignore the smoking, because we are nottttt perfect, and who looks for perfection he will NEVER get it, but before this, I dated my wife 3 years, shhee is a smokerrr,, not anymore,, but because I found too many things in her, and I accepted the other side, she accepts a lot from me, and she always knew my opinion about smoking, so as a gift she gave me a 'smoking quitting gift' the time she had a positive pregnancy test... till this moment.. because i accepted heeeerrrr.. you will never accept.. live alone forever.. by the way she's reading know and she's very happy for what i said..😅😅😅

[OlderAndWiser]

@Juaitem You were lucky. . . and I am not alone. The deal breakers are very few and don't eliminate many women from consideration by me.

[BattleKitten77]

@Juaitem stfu moron

[Mickey9999]

Yes and no. I hate being judgmental especially since i was a smoker. But i only smoked because he did. It’s sort of can’t beat them join them. As a smoker you don’t realize the stench. We’ve all done it... smoked outside thinking we won’t smell and we don’t only because we become immune to the smell but as a non smoker of over eight years i can’t stand the smell 99% of the time. I of course have friends that smoke and i don’t mind as much but I think it would be too much. So maybe date but as far as live with someone or more it would be hard.

[SueShe]

Smoking, drugs, gambling or any addiction as well as piercings, tattoos and a criminal record or history of cheating would be a deal breaker if I was into dating.

Other than that, I would be pretty open to anyone that is not into sex.

[MissKittyz]

Yes, smoking is a dealbreaker and a huuuuge turn off. I would not date a smoker.

My fiancé used to smoke before I met him but was able to quit and doesn't smoke anymore, Thank God. But if he did go back to it, I'd be incredibly mad and tell him to stop.

[Elliegirl]

It’s not a dealbreaker, but I’d rather he didn’t. My husband used to smoke some and I didn’t mind that much since it was only occasionally. Since I got pregnant he quit completely. It’s not that big of a deal around me, but it’s totally not ok around my baby, including while my little man is still in utero.

[Reaperbot666]

Anything more then socially. Smoking and drinking. Is a dealbreaker for me and a major turn off.

Also not fond of people who use drugs excessively.

Grow up around a lot of people who did and I have seen first hand what it can do to you if miss used.

[btbc92]

Never could I ever be with a smoker. I suffer from asthma and I hate smoking. Of people wants to kill themselves they can do so. I don't want cancer.

[AceVenturaYeah]

Brush your teeth and shower. Social smoking is still smoking. Yes it's a bad habit and I am a smoker. Far more repulsive people puffing on a giant battery or scavenging cigarettes from me at a concert while telling me that you don't smoke. Nothing but fake, hypocritical leeches. Grow up, buy a pack of menthols and some gum. Just quit pretending you're better than others.

[DWornock]

Not no, but hell NO! I went on a date with a girl that smoked and kissed her. I could taste the Nicotine or whatever is in cigarettes. It was god awful. I took her home and never called her again, nor have asked other girl that smoke for date. They are worthless and have no value because since I won't kiss them, I won't fuck them.

[StephenCF]

I smoke socially, but I do love cigarettes and cigars as they go with my suits (inspired by my role model, Tom Six) 🎩👔

But I find an elegant, beautiful lady all dressed up smoking with a cigarette-holder (Audrey Hepburn style) to be more of a turn-on than a deal-breaker 😍😍😍🚬🚬🚬

[MrTuxedo]

I do not smoke, I never have, nor will I ever, but it isn't a deal breaker, tho I would very much prefer if she wasn't a smoker, but if I find her attractive, both her looks and personality, smoking is just a small thing.

[Anonymous]

I dont care that they smoke but if its a long term relationship and we are planning a future together then I wouldn’t want my husband to end up having cancer or a health issue and pass away early or have problems. It would just cause a lot of pain for everyone.

[EriFrancis1994]

I can't. I just don't like the smell at all. I don't have anything against their choice of lifestyle.

However if I met the perfect man who's one flaw (in my eyes) is smoking, I'd be torn about how I felt tbh. It's a tough one

[bklynbadboy1]

I agree

[Daniela1982]

I don't smoke and don't wish to kiss an ashtray mouth or smell it on their clothes so it is definitely a deal breaker for me. And I don't think many smokers could give it up easily in order to have a relationship. It's a nasty habit to break.

[Amanda269]

If they smoke outside, contribute to the common expenses and air out before coming inside, it would be fine. I dislike the smell and only have a problem with heavy users, that rush up to me right after and reek of smoke.

[Anonymous]

It is a BIG NO, if she smokes.

I stopped smoking ~10 years ago and could go back, if I live around so many temptations.

Main think, that is putting me off them now is smell of tabaco or some of them try to cover it with some cheep parfum and it is even worse...

[Adam1978]

It's a deal breaker but I don't judge past smokers, if I am worth less than giving up a bad habit, I know I am better off without her. So they can always quit.

[SjE78]

have done before and would do again, i dont smoke personally tbf but i grew up with smokers so it doesn't bother me as much, unless they smoke around my kids or any kid tbh

[Sensmind]

It would be close to a deal breaker - If they showed no intention of trying to quit, I would leave though I would probably never go near them in first place, the smell is disgusting on their clothes.