Should we look for love or let love find us?

[Apple1996]

I truly believe this quote, that we should let love find us. 💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜

What do y'all think, do we need to look or let it find us?

We need to look for love 👀👀👀

Love will find us❤❤❤

[proud_londa]

As far as I have experienced, if you let love find you, you are most probably living in the relationship on the terms of the other, even if it ain't what you imagined. You enjoy early when the other person is approaching you, but after a certain period of time, you are the vulnerable one. If it goes as you like, then you are happy. If not, disagreements
broke and fights happen. Most of the times, breakup happens when the other person wants it.

On the other hand, if you look for love, you have to work hard on getting the other person like you as well. You meet many people, experience what is there in you which the other sex doesn't find intriguing. There may be disappointments for people struggling with their looks or confidence or highly introverted people, but many a times, when you get in a relationship where you are the one who started it, it gives you a kind of confidence and also you can lead the relationship like a boss.

However, sometimes it backfires when both are looking for partners, and the other gets in it just for the sake of getting in a relationship

[MrOracle]

Finding love is similar (but usually even more difficult) than finding a good job - the vast majority of the time, you have to work at it, and experience rejections and setbacks. Sure, occasionally you might stumble into a great job offer, but that is very much the exception, rather than the rule. Most of the time, the job you end up with corresponds to the amount of effort you put into finding it.

Love is very much the same way - very occasionally you get lucky, but most of the time it's a lot of time and effort, with failures along the way. And that should be your expectation going in.

[SueAnon84]

I don't know. I answered B only because I did unconsciously find "love" in that way but it wasn't like it was to last anyway. He was divorced, had a child already and had a lot of other things that I considered red flags I couldn't get over! I ended up being very jealous of his past! Anyway, I don't want to get into too much detail anymore with that stuff because it's very personal but then I think at first it was more like lust! Then I just got attatched to the sex!

I think if I do look for love on the other hand, I'll know right away what I want and what I don't want and he should be willing to accept my flaws as well! It takes a lot of work to have a relationship you know... I feel that it could be either way but a lot of people are just romantics deep down even if they don't realize it so they would rather chose B! Even if they aren't compatible with their "found love"! So do what you fucking want! I give up!

[VIVANT]

Wait for it. Just like with finding a job. Just wait. It will show up on your door step 🙃🙃

I don’t think waiting around is the answer to much in life. I think we will have all the time in the world to wait , after we pass over.

I think we should go after what we think we need while we are here. Life is meant to be lived. Don’t obsess sure. But I’m not a fan of waiting.

Realistically that quite is for women to be passive. If everyone just waited, nothing would happen.

Wait for the guy to ask you out. When someone asks someone out, they are not “waiting”. If no one asks anyone out, nothing will happen.

Soooo as I see it, it’s basically sexism wrapped up in “ wisdom”

But I will allow that I can be wrong. 😊

[lumos]

I think it's a mix of both. Love won't find you if you sit at home 24/7, putting absolutely no effort into socializing and meeting new people. But if you try to force it to happen, people will most likely sense your desperation and run for the hills, or you will do as my friend and self-sabotage whatever potential relationship you have (she does this because she's scared of disappointment but also very needy. She'll jump from guy to guy but push them away eventually, even though she does want something long term).

The best approach is to put effort into putting yourself out there and going on dates with new people, but having a calm mindset about it. Things will work out if they're meant to be. And if not, well, you keep looking.

[OlderAndWiser]

You can either sit back and wait for life to happen to you or you can make things happen in y our life. You can be the victim of whatever life sends to you or you can be an active participant in your life. You can wait for love and complain about it not happening or you can look for love, improve yourself along the journey, and find the one you want.

I have never had a girl knock at my front door and ask for a date. I have always needed to go looking for potential partners.

[kwaza]

😂😂! Your last sentence got me laughing. I'm pretty sure, going out to look for love makes more sense

[aWes0MeNeSs]

I'm choosing to let it find me, because at the moment, I'm focusing on myself and my career and not on love. I also find that any time I try to look really hard for something, I can't find it, but once I forget about it and start focusing on other things, it usually finds its way into my life, ironically enough.

But, I'm also taking a hiatus from dating. I just haven't been wanting to for the last few years and have had other things I've been wanting to focus on. I'd like to work on myself some more before entering another relationship, and for me, it's more about if and when the right person comes along. I'm not looking and there's no one I'm interested in right now.

[coachTanthony]

You should always be ready for SERENDIPITY to have it's moment!

So I say BOTH!

[SydneySentinel]

Love will find us... but sometimes you have to put in the work.

[Apope16]

Its sooo romantic to be in denial. Then it hits you. Sooo cute and sexy.

[zaffy69]

I would always search for the "one". I would get sad because I saw all these couples happily together and every person I thought were the one just ended up being a mistake. Eventually I gave up and started focusing on myself and after a month I found my current boyfriend. He came when I least expected him. I love and appreciate his ass. We do have problems be we're mature and smart enough to deal with it. we always say " no matter how hard it gets let's fight for us" or "if you like a flower you pluck it but if you love it you water it. I choose to water you to nurture you because I love you and even when you turn dull I'll do my best to bring you back to life"

[Hamsteroids]

It should find us. Back then, I was so hellbent I’m trying to find someone to have and when they failed, I became more and more depressed about it, until one day I just said “fuck jt” and stopped caring. I didn’t look for love or relationships and said “it’ll happen when it happens”. And lo and behold, it did. I met a guy by chance, and that guy today is my current boyfriend. I wasn’t looking for a relationship and neither was he. We didn’t really think we needed one at the time, but it just happened an I am the happiest I’ve ever been in a relationship.

So in short: love should find you

[Jjpayne]

I've been waiting for love to find me for 20 years... That cheap is only in movies or at least it seems to me... I was waiting for that bump into encounter or hey I know you for this place... But it did not happen for me :( and not even a girl coming up to me saying anything... It's been a long hard lonely road :(

[Apple1996]

Awhhh you'll find a girl when the time is right

[Jjpayne]

I hope so...

[ImagineSketchy]

I looked and found nothing. I'm assuming if I wait, it might come to me. When I used to hunt for food about 15 years ago, I was better at trapping my prey rather than seeking it out. Maybe love is similar to an animal for me? Maybe if I set my trap, I can lure it in easily.

[LeoElias]

This question only applies to guys. Because if a chick runs into a guy she likes you know for sure as hell she isn't going to approach him. Basically everything is dumped onto the guy. She'll stand there looking pretty and the dudes gotta debate if its worth it.

[Apple1996]

Some women approach guys

[LeoElias]

Some but not a lot. I've never encounter a forward girl so they are rare in my opinion.

[DorkVader]

If you're not going to actively pursue it, then you must put yourself into position for it to find you. Nobody gonna love you holed up in your apartment. You have to be physically present and emotionally open in both cases, because ultimately you never know

[agent_orange]

It's better to love yourself first because love comes to those who are at peace to who they are. Love is actually all around us and it comes to those who will actively participate in the life of others. In other words, go out, mingle and interact not for the sole purpose of finding love but to establish a connection to everyone. Don't be desperate and be patient. Patiently waiting for results when you're acting makes it possible that real love will find you.

[MissDawn7961]

I think we women should let love find us for we are worth it ! also I think we women spend to much time searching and hunting for that perfect man too ! we women do not need a man who wants us to do all the work for him while he gets lazier by the day ! everyone deserves the opposite sex to love them in the way God loves us

[NatePsychologyMajor]

This is a catch 22 kind of question. Good things come to those who wait. No one can wait forever. So the answer is both. Nothing wrong with look, (chasing sometime). Nothing wrong with letting love find you (being chased). Just be open minded and accept that good and bad guys will enter your love to teach you love it teach you a lesson.

[Corerue]

It's better to work on yourself, your life and future first. Life has a way of making connections and instances happen. The biggest thing is, do not shut yourself away from life.

Build up your career, your goals and be outgoing. Eventually you will run into that person who is like you and gets you. If you forcefully search for it though. You may end up with someone you do not want to be with later.

Just my opinion.

TL:DR; let life happen, be adventurous, grow yourself. Love finds a way.

[LaVillaStrangiato]

Letting love find you has so many more benefits. You can concentrate on your life, career, and loving yourself. This will inherently make you more attractive to the opposite sex. Plus, it allows you to build your empire much faster, and with a solid focus.
You can go out and actually have fun - instead of sticking to some kind of agenda and being heartbroken over and over again.

[RHK36]

I think it depends on the person and what you want out of life. If you think you're ready then get to looking. It is nice when it comes outta nowhere. Try a bit of both. Actively looking while being available for someone to come to you, something like that lol.

[Anonymous]

A little of both I think. You gotta know what’s important to you, looks and personality wise. Then you gotta go find it. It’s not something that is easy to find that’s for sure. It shouldn’t just be someone you are attracted too which I think is where a lot of people fail to realize. It won’t last long.

[SocialNinja]

I think we have to open a bunch of doors and see who walks in 😅

I don't work in a normal setting nor do I go out much.. So I don't see how love could find me haha

So I am on apps and in groups. I hope the doors I open will welcome the right man!

[Anonymous]

I've never had a boyfriend at almost 21 in a few months. I hear people say both. I hardly believe in love anymore, but I do know that it seems like no one else has to try and it just finds them. No matter who you are, what you look like, how much money you earn, how smart or healthy you are. It finds you. As for me... I have no idea, at this point I'm just ready to give up on it all together.