Guys: When you find out that a girl you like is already taken, do you move on or wait for her to break up with her current partner?

[beebella]

Not a girl that you just find physically attractive, but a girl that you actually like and would want to go out with.

And what I mean by "wait" is that you don't really try to get too serious with anyone else because you're just waiting for the girl you really want to be single again.

Move on

I can wait

I can do both, can't I?

[coachTanthony]

The cardinal sin for any guy is to sit around a wait for some girl he is pining after. My advice for any guy out there is:

1. Make sure your last interaction with her is a memorable one.
2. Tell her the guy she is dating is one lucky man.
3. Move on with your life. If it's meant to be down the road then it will happen.

These 3 steps do a couple of things.

If you ever want her to remember you if or when she breaks up with this guy... you better make a good impression.

Making a good lasting impression is key to any possibility of something with them down the road. Don't burn a perfectly good bridge because the time is not right.

[loveslongnails]

I agree with you coach, though I take exception to the second sentence of number 3. I'm in total agreement with the first sentence... move on with your life. The next sentence could be a #4 on it's own, and I'd disagree with that! :) I truly believe you can make your own "breaks" in many of life's situations. So whenever I hear "if it's meant to be it will happen", I think to myself "well then why DO anything, just plod along and see what falls on you". That may be a little extreme, but I think you get my gist. In this example, if I were convinced this is the girl for me and she just doesn't know it yet, I'd make sure I keep track of her situation. Then if an opportunity arose, I'd take action. Of course, I wouldn't wait years and years because I'd miss other things, but as long as I was on the market, I'd keep a lookout for her !

[coachTanthony]

@loveslongnails Okay. I mean not sure what to say. Thanks for the comments.

[loveslongnails]

You said it !!

[coachTanthony]

@loveslongnails You are more than welcome to disagree. I think you are looking at it the way you want to perceive it so... it's all good!

[loveslongnails]

Isn't that really what we all do when answering a hypothetical situation? I've tried to make that point with another gagger here. There are some hypothetical situations where I'd agree we're pretty darn sure on how we'd respond, but there are others where you just don't know till you get there. Even in this example, what if you are absolutely certain with every fiber of your being that this taken guy/girl is the one heaven has made for you? What would you do? Would you stop at nothing, never give up, even if they go ahead and marry that other person? I don't think we know till we're in it.

[ZeussLightningBolt]

I voted C. I usually give it some time in the hopes that she'll break up with him and date me, but eventually when I realize it isn't gonna happened, I look for someone else

[Kurαȷ]

I treat taken women the same way I treat single women.
I express my interest in them and give them the opportunity to react to that the way they deem appropriate.

If the answer is "I don't feel the same way" then I move along.
The fact that someone is in a relationships does not really influence my own attitude towards them.
I have no moral obligation to the person who is dating them, and they are the only person who is responsible for the choices they make.

[BoredandWondering]

I've actively tried to find a new girlfriend and have dated many. I had a girl that I was truly in love with. I was really immature at the time though and did stupid things which is why she didn't stick around even though she liked me. I'm hoping that one day I'll run into her again. She's married and I'm happy for her and would never jeopardize that. If anything changed though I would be there in a heartbeat

[serious]

It won’t matter to me because I can never like any woman. I can never attracted to any woman.

I can only find a woman attractive from a distance ( not any attractive woman but a particular type only).

Hence I only wish to remain single for life and so the situation you mentioned in your question will never occur in my life.

[LoU_Hades]

D: I don't care about her guy
If she wants me and I want her, they guy is just a small obstacle but not a deal breaker. In real world attractive single women don't exist, you have to hurt someone.

People who aren't willing to cheat or to dump their partners, don't show interest to every attractive guy/girl who crosses their way.

[sawno]

A or C depending on how much i value her as a friend. Assuming its early on and there are no feelings yet i have no issue with being friends. If he ever leaves her and she is ready to date i can step up, if not i'd have a nice friend. But i only do this path if i care about her friendship knowing we won't ever be together. Otherwise its best to just move on.

[sawno]

As far as the actual waiting goes its a no, if i meet another girl i like who is single i obviously go with her instead. You only get me exclusive when we are in a relationship or well on our way to being in one.

[addlinny]

It's best to try to move on but sometimes that is very difficult. There is someone I like and we've been friends for 5 years but she's now in a relationship. It's difficult to move on because of our past friendship but I would never want to get in the way of her relationship if it makes her happy.

[JackSmy]

I respect her being in a relationship, married, or even liking other women. No sense waiting, and she likes who she likes.
You never know when, or who you are going to meet next, and maybe the next one is so much better, cuter, and totally a match!

[TadCurious]

In the past when I've been in that situation I've tried to have the mindset of "Well good for her (and him). I can understand what he sees in her" and move on. But that's the attitude I aspire to and it's easier said than done. But I don't want to mope around with the mindset of "I hope they break up, or I hope she dumps him." That's a really negative place to be. 🎄🌲

[Browneye57]

It is an excepted fact that a woman will dump a perfectly good man if she thinks she can snag a better one. So that's why guys don't wait.
Women don't either - if he's good enough for the one he's with, she figures she can be even better than her, and will try to seduce him.

For singles, it's crickets.

[Ephermerallhama]

Moving on, in my opinion, is the right thing to do. A wise birdie once told me that there are plenty of fish in the ocean 😊 I just have to believe that haha.