"You're a cool loner"?

[Anonymous]

I was talking to a friend of mine last night and we started talking about our friends and why I don't hang out with people more often. She called me a cool loner because people are always trying to get me to go out and do things with them but I usually refuse.

I don't say no because I think I'm too cool to hang out with them or anything like that, I just like being on my own I guess. I'm not sure why but most of the time I'd rather chill on my own than hang out with people. I used to hang out a lot with my old friends but then I moved and didn't really have friends for a year. Now I'm in college and I have lots of people I can chill with but I never call them to hang out and when they call me I usually say no.

Is anyone else a loner by choice?

[Brando]

I am to an extent. I used to be more so when I was younger, but I've come out of that a little bit and hang out with people more than I used to. I have the same thing you describe: some people will want me to come hang out with them but I just don't feel like so I politely refuse. I guess there's a certain energy or vibe that us loners give off that make people want to bring us out.

One time a few semesters ago, I hung out with someone from class. When we went back to class that Wednesday, someone asked him what he did over the weekend. He said a couple of things, then pointed to me and said "We hung out over the weekend. It was pretty fun" and the girl looked at him like "Whaaaa?" almost like the dude had accomplished something major. Maybe that's just our charm?

[learningthegame16]

haha yes! I was thinking about this, we definately do give off an energy that makes people flock to us. Maybe it's because we give off an aurora of self confidence?

[Brando]

That's the only thing I can come up with lol

"Look at that guy/girl, they don't care if they're with somebody or not. They must have something that keeps them entertained enough to not care. I wonder what it is...what makes them so confident and content? I want to find out why they are so chilled out, why they could/can easily ignore my presence and still be content. How do they do it?"

[DarklyDreamingDexter]

Yea dude. I love being alone.

I have a hundred things that I am interested in, so I can fill my day up being by myself.

If I do choose to go out and hang with friends or go explore and meet new people I usually return to my homebase after about 1 or 2 hours.

It isn't a bad thing, you know.

I see it as time spent on growing skills, or sucking in information online, or what ever you yourself do.

I just don't like being interrupted by people when I'm way inside my own head doing stuff I want to do.

[Anonymous]

when I think of a cool loner, I think of a guy who keeps to himself mostly and is a lone wolf type, but at the same time isn't socially awkward, creepy or weird like the stereotypical "loner" is.

i'm a loner but I wish I had more friends. it's hard to meet people because I'm shy and most people seem like they're already cliqued up. I used to be a lot more social and I want to get back to that

[Spacemen3]

yes, I am, I love being on my own.

But people don't think I'm cool, just weird. lol

[Asker]

ha ha

[arashmenalagha]

yeah same!