Mixed signals after break up? Devastated?

[Ria7777]

My ex boyfriend and me told each other about our pasts which we thought was needed But things backfired for me... He took my past very seriously and Dwels on my past and he is too bothered with whom i slept in the past before him Because if this he breaks up with me every 10 days and we r back together in hours... He thinks i am interested in every guy i meet... But the truth is i only love him... 3 nights back i cancelled on his date cuz he we had a fight... and he ended things with me for good... Saying he cannot deal with my past anymore... I pled... Begged.. cried... but he was rigid disconnected my calls repeatedly.. I started going through the post breakup grieving.. Hours later he texts "i am sorry'. I dont reply Yesterday he message s "am i ok.. he knows he has no rights to ask but still asking" This is leaving me confused.. why is he messaging me if he is done with me.. Does he wants me back

[victorvolf]

He clearly can't handle his thoughts about your past right now. Part of him thinks you didn't change while the other part thinks you are not your past. He needs time to process these things and realize that unless he has evidence for the former, the second part of him is true.

You don't need to break up for this. He is taking a very immature way of dealing with his thoughts. My guess is that subconsciously seeing you beg and plead makes him feel like you really only love and want him and he wants that reassurance to ease his worries.

Thing is this cycle will never end. As soon as you two get back to normal all those thoughts he didn't know how to handle will surface because that begging and pleading ain't there to ease them. Then he will start a fight, break-up and come back again. The best thing you can do is let him leave for good so that he has the time to process the feelings he has.

It's not right to be judged like that for your past but I know that finding something distressing about someone's past can affect you, he just needs to handle it like an adult.

[Ria7777]

I just had couple of boyfriends in the past thats it... Which i told him... He had more gfs than me. . I dont bother about his past... But he cannot stop bothering...
I didn't reply his messages... But in anger i deleted his number nd dont memorize it... God knows what is he feeling... So couldn't reply to his msgs... I don't know is he still waiting for my message or he will never message again... Or he might delete my number... No way to know that...

[victorvolf]

I have been with a girl that kept saying I don't love her and I need to prove it. She would brake up with me and I would beg for her to take me back. This happened a lot of times. One day I decided I was done with it and I walked away and guess who began to beg and plead... He most likely will contact you, as I did back then I suggest you don't take them back. It's not worth it.

[Nuespeed]

Yeah he probably realised that he was wrong but hey you won't know for sure until you talk to him.

[Ria7777]

I didn't reply his messages... But in anger i deleted his number nd dont memorize it... God knows what is he feeling... So couldn't reply to his msgs... I don't know is he still waiting for my message or he will never message again... Or he might delete my number... No way to know that...

[Anonymous]

This is so toxic, and please don’t go back to him. Your past sound have no relevancy to your present, and for him to so shamelessly hold it against you is just wrong. How can you trust him with anything now that you’re seeing how he responds to your honesty? He’s destroyed the trust. I know breakups aren’t always as simple as just “being done”, but you should want more for yourself than allowing a guy like this to walk in and out of your life. It’s destructive as all hell.