“The moment I meet an attractive woman I have to start pretending that I have no desire to make love to her.” Ladies, is this hot or objectionable?

Question

Listen to this dialogue and vote whether it's hot or objectionable:

Aren't Cary Grant and Eva Marie Saint great? I love them together.
And this dialogue written by Ernest Lehman just sizzles. This is my kind of writing.

“The moment I meet an attractive woman I have to start pretending that I have no desire to make love to her.”
“What makes you think you have to conceal it?”:
“She might find the idea objectionable.”
“Then again, she might not.”
“Think how lucky I am to be seated here.”
“Luck has nothing to do with it.”
“Fate?”
[shaking her head] “I tipped the steward $5 to seat you here if you should come in.”
“Is that a proposition?”
“I never [discuss love] on an empty stomach.”
(Note that the original screenwriter’s line was “I never make love on an empty stomach.” But the studio dubbed it to something less overtly sexual.)
“You’ve already eaten.”
“But you haven’t.”
“Don’t you think it was time we were introduced?”

Basically, how many men could get away with saying this, and a woman find it arousing?
I know, you're going to say 'It depends how good looking the guy is' - and sure, to some extent that's absolutely true. But Cary Grant is not only good looking. He knows how to carry himself. He is seducing her. And she is seducing him.
(It's also a murder mystery, and a cat and mouse tale, but that's beside the point. Let's say most people are not caught up in a Hitchcock spy thriller.)

Longer version of the same scene:

https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0053125/reference

Lliam · Accepted Answer

She was tall and long-legged and her blonde hair hung down sort of like what Beethoven had in mind when he wrote the Moonlight Sonata. She wore a knit sweater and jeans so tight it looked as if she'd been poured into them and forgot to say "When". When she moved, she seemed to undulate under her clothes in ways that took a man's mind off the state of the economy.

Raising one eyebrow almost imperceptibly, the corner of her mouth hinting at a sultry smile, she said in a voice as rich and creamy as fresh Wisconsin butter, "Is this seat taken?"

"Uh, oh, um, I uh... why uh sure, um I guess."

The way she slid into the seat was like smooth jazz. "My name is Natalia."

"Gosh! You're pretty!"

Hah. Take that Cary Grant.

Grond21 · Accepted Answer

It's been a long time since I've seen North by Northwest.  Those two! They really knew how to carry a scene and build the sexual tension with subtlety and class

FlutteringFeelings · Accepted Answer

Realistically speaking it's not easy. As a woman I know men are visual and women are visual but more emotional. I was seeing this guy and we were getting to know one another. Every time he saw me he got on hard. I knew it because whenever we greet one another it's "there". LOL. Some things you can't control if you're attracted to that person you may say one thing with your mind while your body says another. It's like going through a breakup. A man may say "I'm over her" but deep down his body will have different reactions to the breakup.

Happy_pizza · Accepted Answer

I can't speak for all girls, but to me, that's pretty attractive; to know that a guy doesn't only look at you as a piece of meat gives a huge sense of security and comfort if that makes any sense, but to each their own.

errorgoodnameunfound · Answer

I'm no woman, but I've noticed the boom in the amount of likes I got whenever I commented something like "don't approach, don't chase, be stoic" both from men and women. And not just a boom, but a near immediate one. I don't think I've ever seen a type of comment I made receive so much agreement so fast in my 5+ years on here.

So my guess is, women prefer a man to hide it. Though I still think even hiding it can be looked at badly, because then there's a possible fakeness to everything.

The last thing is this was asked with assumption that men for sure want sex. In 1959, maybe this was common thinking. Now though? There's quite a few men that are becoming far more careful and thinking with brains, not dicks. Even if a woman legit reserved a seat on a train for me and indicated possible sexual desire for me, I would 100% question it before rushing in.

Also, imagine this in modern days, gender reversal.

thegirlfromthething · Answer

It’s not objectionable or arousing. They both seem to be into the suggestive banter so no one is being harassed or disrespected here but it’s not a turn on for me. Guys who bring up sex that quickly turn me off.

ecfresh · Answer

As a guy, she is hot because she is direct, confident, and sexy. She isn’t playing coy, she is looking directly at him. She complimented him first. She literally paid $5 ($50 today) for him to sit there. She chose him, that’s hot.

el_Te_de_la_Rosa · Answer

If a woman doesn't show a signal she's interested, for me it's still inappropriate.
Though his "Make Love" is still better than what I was said to in real life (eg. sex, kamasutra, positions, hotel... etc.) Hot or not, it upsets me. I am not a casual type, and I consider it manner-less.

0112358 · Answer

I'll be interested to see votes. I suspect to some extent attitudes are shifting.

In spite of the fact there's more of a hookup culture then there has been in a while, there's also a simultaneous pushback on overt hitting on people in scenarios not designed specifically for it. I don't think that's yet a majority view, but it's growing.

tenukitanuki · Answer

when people try to do Don Draper they'd probably find it easier to do Grant

it has been so long I can't remember the place in the plot so I'm naturally very suspicious and less aroused by the context as written but... lady is a smokeshow

mk200195 · Answer

I haven't seen the movie but i do find this scene incredibly hot. We all have engaged in conversations like these in our past relationships but that is only ofcourse if you prefer big brains over big 🌭. Besides it also tells us that women are not primarily driven by looks but how the man makes them feel.

Aakash_Hangargi · Answer

I dint understand I may find lots of women desirable but I can't just go to every women I see I want to make love to you even though if I want to do u may conceal it bc I don't want to action on it.

I know they are basically talking about taking chance to opportunity presented and go with but if I am already committed then this would be cheating isn't it so I don't get point? Why are they stating the oblivious or is there something I am missing can someone enlighten me @AmandaYVR

Godofmyownwurld · Answer

Eh, creepy😬  When you don't have Oscar worthy actors and background music, that dialogue doesn't exactly inspire passion.

VIVANT · Answer

dont we all do this- some more than others Lolol

“The moment I meet an attractive woman/ man I have to start pretending that I have no desire to make love to her/ him. Date her/ him “

I think it’s very common 😊

Jjpayne · Answer

That would be torture for me, to have to fake it... But I think sometimes keeping a cool head and playing it cool is what you need to do

Jamie05rhs · Answer

Amanda, I wrote a similar question to this a while back. :)

https://www. girlsaskguys. com/sexual-behavior/q4505216-have-you-ever-had-someone-in-your-life-with-whom-you-have-a-mature? utm_source=dynamic&utm_medium=androidapp&utm_campaign=question&utm_content=q4505216

devilish-cutie · Answer

That flies in movies, not rl In rl it would sound like he was only after sex and maybe if thats what both would want it could fly P. S. Im familiar w the scene, movie, everything

Unit1 · Answer

Pfft. I got no time to play kindergarten games. Leave dating to the adults. Dating isn't for grown humans with childish mentalities.

nousername1994 · Answer

I saw that movie about two years ago or less. I liked it. It was quite the love story. Trust the British with American sensibilities to make a great Hitchcock film.

eat_love_workout · Answer

of the women I have dated I find the less interested you and the busier/less available you make yourself the more women are attracted to you

mrgspoter · Answer

He's a actor he did that over and over till they made it look good it's not real life I can't watch them types of old rubbish, people don't even behave this way or sound that way when they talk is bad acting I think.

dandiecandie · Answer

I'd slap this guy to the curb the minute I get him where I want him which is naked and tied up to a bed and then just leave him there.

brightsun_ · Answer

neither hot nor objectionable. Depends on whether you intend to have sex with her or not. If you intend to, I think it's self sabotage. If you don't, then you are communicating clearly.

COMMODOREII · Answer

I get away with that all the time. They say it's because i am attractive but i say it's my charisma and my confidence. It resonates from my tongue to her loins. 😎

“The moment I meet an attractive woman I have to start pretending that I have no desire to make love to her.” Ladies, is this hot or objectionable?

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