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I'm the president of one of the smaller, auditioned, student orgs at my college. More than half of the guys in the group have expressed romantic interest in me. I've turned all of them down, for various reasons, including that I feel the power dynamic created in the group would make it inappropriate for me to date any of them.
Honestly, they've all reacted fairly well. I'm super careful about how I let people down, especially the guys in this org, but still.
Two of them in particular continue to shower me with compliments constantly. And it's very sweet, but it makes me feel guilty, because I just don't see them that way.
With the first one it's not as bad. He mostly just calls me cute, pretty, adorable, beautiful, etc. all the time. Physical compliments, mostly.
With the second it's a bit more complicated, because I had to turn him down twice. The first time was almost a year ago. The way he asked was really sweet and thoughtful though. The second time, because in a previous conversation he had said he was interested in someone else, and because the way he asked was so much more casual than the previous time, I thought he just meant as friends. So I agreed. And I guess he knew that it wasn't necessarily a date either, because he asked me afterward, and I told him that I just saw him as a friend. I felt really bad about that.
And now he continues to be really sweet. Which is a good thing, and reacting well to rejection should be the standard. But most guys don't, and I'm not used to it, and therefore it makes me feel guilty. And the compliments are really thoughtful too. The other day he told me that I make the whole room light up when I walk in, and that I have a way of making everyone happy and excited about the littlest things.
He's so sweet. To the point that it makes me want to cry. And I just feel awful that I can't return his feelings. I don't want to ask him to stop. He's allowed to have feelings. I just feel guilty.
Thank you!
Honestly, they've all reacted fairly well. I'm super careful about how I let people down, especially the guys in this org, but still.
Two of them in particular continue to shower me with compliments constantly. And it's very sweet, but it makes me feel guilty, because I just don't see them that way.
With the first one it's not as bad. He mostly just calls me cute, pretty, adorable, beautiful, etc. all the time. Physical compliments, mostly.
With the second it's a bit more complicated, because I had to turn him down twice. The first time was almost a year ago. The way he asked was really sweet and thoughtful though. The second time, because in a previous conversation he had said he was interested in someone else, and because the way he asked was so much more casual than the previous time, I thought he just meant as friends. So I agreed. And I guess he knew that it wasn't necessarily a date either, because he asked me afterward, and I told him that I just saw him as a friend. I felt really bad about that.
And now he continues to be really sweet. Which is a good thing, and reacting well to rejection should be the standard. But most guys don't, and I'm not used to it, and therefore it makes me feel guilty. And the compliments are really thoughtful too. The other day he told me that I make the whole room light up when I walk in, and that I have a way of making everyone happy and excited about the littlest things.
He's so sweet. To the point that it makes me want to cry. And I just feel awful that I can't return his feelings. I don't want to ask him to stop. He's allowed to have feelings. I just feel guilty.
Thank you!
