It happens to me with women. I was bullied while growing up. Beaten everyday by other men older than me and of my same age. Also women ridiculized me by dancing when I entered the place I had no other option to go and knew I was going to be beaten the crap out by other men. This happened everyday for a decade. I remember the first years after that when I entered a place with people of my age my eyes would get tunnel vision, my brain would stop understanding what others were saying, I would have difficult time breathing, sometimes I would have insomnia out of the blue, etc. I've been going to therapy for 4 years now. This things don't happen that often, but sometimes happen. I do have a massive hard time expressing and reading certain interest cues, I have a hard time allowing certain emotions to be felt by myself, because I learned lots of ways to kind of freeze them because it was another reason to get beaten. When I am near a woman that interests me she doesn't even realize I like her because inside myself there's a huge "fight" let's say it that way. And I have found most people don't get it, and if I tell women they don't want anything to do with mez at most friendship.
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I would really look at keeping at the counselling and making sure the counsellor is experienced with rape, abuse and PTSD.
I would also look at stepping back from dating for a bit.
if you have any guy friends trying hanging out with them.
have you shared this with any of your friends?
try talking to guys in a controlled approach, at a shop ask where such and such a product is, clothes shopping, ask a guy if they do a different size or colour etc.
gradually get used to talking to guys in shops, supermarkets etc.
PTSD isn't easy to deal with nor your experiences. I am so sorry you had to go through that. I feel you need to get more therapy to help you get out there. Also it's a lot to deal with. Finding a boyfriend that helps you feel secure and patient enough when you're still healing isn't always the best time to have a boyfriend. You can start a relationship when you feel more secure.
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The world is really evil. The people giving you medication are the next abusers you need to conquer. Get off that shit and focus on internal work, meditation, therapy, constructive hobbies help I hear, and also can attract men if they are interesting, like playing an instrument or singing
Oh sorry for hear that. That happened me some years ago but not so intensive like you describe.
I recomend you to not think on that.
Also be distracted with something else like tv, cellphone, xbox but it can't be of shooters or things like that I mean not agresive things. when you get asleep you go to bed and sleep. that may help you to not have nigthmares and if you can try to turn off the light,
Or sleep with your parents.😀😀😀All I can say is go and be expose to men. That's the only way your gonna find someone who can help you. Shyness is overcome by will power. So you must over come it, slowly but surely. For take baby steps.
I'm not a psychologist, but do you find it easier to deal with men if you're not alone with them? If you're in a public somewhere, or in a group? You might find your fears lessened if you're doing something WITH a guy- there's an old saying that women bond face-to-face, men bond shoulder-to-shoulder.
Well I suggest finding a support group and maybe writing books about it and focus on yourself first
Don't worry, there are still good people in the world. Try to focus on good things and don't think about bad things that make you upset.
I suggest talking to a professional to find the best approach
I have been trying to talk to you.
I am very sorry to hear about your situation.You're allowed to be shy, but, shy people, are directly correlated to low confidence. you need to have your confidence boosted
Try speaking to men your age on here or on other apps online until you get your confidence back.
Most guys though aren't like your step dad, and would secretly like to punch his lights out for what he did to you. lWhy would you want to stop being shy being shy is cute
i guess... let the time heal you?
what kind of men do you want?Maybe some constant communication could break this trauma
Try talking to Guys who don't really talk like Shy Guys, I have anxiety myself and I have trouble in group situations but I feel more comfortable talking one on one to someone so you could try that.
I'm sorry that happened to you. But maybe if you wait until you're in better circumstances, you can try, and a good option would be shy people. I'm the same age by the way
First love yourself...
I’m going on a limb here, but do you blame yourself for any of it? If so, you have to overcome that.
Tell the guy you have to be the one whose in charge in bed.
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