Should you always go for a first kiss on a first date?

[coachTanthony]

[Punkbuster107]

I polled people on G@G about this a few years back. It was really insightful, and I applied the advice on my first date with my wife to good success.



The question about what romantic gesture you would want to end the ideal first date with, assuming it went perfectly.


I won’t recap in full, but I got quite a few responses (my best poll on G@G) and women stated their ideals were:

38% for a hug, 27% for a kiss on the cheek, 26% for a kiss. I was impressed that a make out session and having sex on the first date each had less than 4% votes.


The way I internalized this advice was that if a first date went really great, like, as good as I could hope for, I would choose to end it with a kiss on the cheek. I figured it had a good chance of seeming perfect to about 1/3 of girls, while the remaining 2/3 would have expected either a downgrade to a hug or an upgrade to a full kiss, but would at least be satisfied that I was only one standard deviation away from their expectation in either direction. I might seem a little extra cautions/respectful if they were expecting a full kiss, or I might seem just a tiny bit extra confident if they had expected a hug, but not enough to be off-putting. Everyone wins.


My first date with my wife ended great, and to this day she reminds me how kissing her on the cheek as went our separate ways was the perfect ending to a perfect first date. It kind of sealed the deal that we would both remain infatuated with each other for the coming years.


You can always consider a straight up kiss on consecutive dates. I totes recommend the cheek kiss though, you cannot go wrong.

[Punkbuster107]

As for what you should “always” do. I would say if I wasn’t sold on wanting a second date at the time the date was ending, I would go for a hug. Hugs are always nice.

Definitely wouldn’t have gone for a kiss (even on the cheek) at the end of *every* first date though. I feel like they’re for special people or they mean nothing.

[OlderAndWiser]

In the past, I have always been hopeful for a kiss on the first date, but you must pay attention to the non-verbal signals from your date. If she isn't ready for a kiss and you try to rush it, she will only become uncomfortable and the odds of a second date (if that is what you want) decrease.

On the first date with my current girlfriend, I walked her to her car and she jumped in before I had a chance to try to give her a kiss. I let that one pass.

On our second date, I walked her to her car and she again jumped in her car. I pulled her car door open, leaned in, and said, "There was one other thing I wanted to tell you," and then I gave her a kiss. It was a romantic kiss but not a I'm-gonna-remove-your-tonsils-with-my-tongue kiss.

On the third date she was expecting a good night kiss!

[Little_Bumblebee]

No, you shouldn't.
People are so different when it comes to this.
What's important is you feeling where the other stands, first if all. What kind of person are they.

Personally I haven't kissed someone on the first date yet, I don't feel comfortable doing that. So even if I was attracted to the guy, I would decline.
However, I also have a friend who have had sex with a guy 3-4 times the first time she have met up with a guy.
People are so different.

So, what's important is you read the atmosphere and the person.
Remember you can always flirt with them, maybe some light touches to establish contact and all that.
But read them! And accept if they decline. Be respectful.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Not if you not "feeling" the person.. Well, for myself anyways.. If there's no attraction or chemistry or the date don't go well, I'm not giving no kiss 💋

[coachTanthony]

Well I agree but sometimes you are feeling it but doubt that’s it’s a good idea …maybe you should just go for it?

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

But that would tarnish my spinster image🤣🤣

[coachTanthony]

Ha Ha Ha

[MysteriousDarkness]

@Brainsbeforebeauty
"I'm not giving no kiss." That means you will kiss them.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

@MysteriousDarkness LOL how does it mean that🤔

[MysteriousDarkness]

@Brainsbeforebeauty
You used a double negative. A double negative is a standard form using two negatives to express a positive ("She is not unhappy").

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

@MysteriousDarkness Ummm okay not giving no kiss meant kiss on cheek, kiss on mouth, kiss anywhere... Why said it way I did.. I don't kiss just anybody anymore than I have sex with just anybody (means don't have sex with just anybody, less try to twist or misunderstand what I'm saying)

[MysteriousDarkness]

@Brainsbeforebeauty
I did not misunderstand or twist what you said. If you wanted to say you will not give a kiss then should have typed it as I'm not giving them a kiss.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

@MysteriousDarkness you speak your way I'll speak mine😊

[coachTanthony]

@Brainsbeforebeauty What about a kiss on the cheeks? You pick which cheeks Ha

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

🤣🤣🤣

[Daniela1982]

Are you going on a date to have a good time and get to know someone or to figure out if you want to go out with them again, or to kiss, make out, and maybe have sex? Some people can't seem to see the difference between a date and a hook up. I think a kiss is a bad idea as it may give someone false readings that this is the person of their dreams. Doesn't sex usually start with a kiss? They kissed me, that means they really dig me. Oh boy! I'm gonna plan our wedding tomorrow!

Give me a kiss baby!

[ArrowheadSW]

Right on!

[nolabels]

Good question.
Even though I used to be a fan of kissing (is that a thing?), I now find the act of kissing to be rather strange.
I do recognize that it is a typical form of expressing affection, so I'll let it stand as such.

I'd say that if you have any desire at all to be more than friends, you have to go for it, otherwise the chances of ever being anything more than a friend will be significantly reduced.

If you get shut down, too bad, move on. She wasn't for you anyway.

[Anonymous]

Personally speaking, the first date would be a little too soon for me even if the chemistry was there and we were attracted to each other. If I were you I would just let it build up until the point where you guys are undeniably both wanting to kiss each other and then let it happen naturally at that point. If you have to guess it’s probably best that you just wait to do it.

[ZackBan]

I kinda play my hand on the first date and if it pans out I can tell and go for the kiss.

Although to this day only once did I have a kiss on a first date but no sex followed. The other 4 times it ended up becoming more than a kiss

[Sincerly_KittyCat]

I honestly wouldn't have minded giving a little kiss on a first date but I am so paranoid of kissing in general. With mono and all sorts of STDs that you can get from kissing gets me scared.

[DeeDeeDeVour]

If the date's going mutually well, a 1st kiss isn't far fetched. Besides, it'd be nice to know early on if there's a "spark" which might seal the deal.

[Miah02]

Naw should be based off how it's going and if the person seems fine wit it

[coachTanthony]

How will we know for sure?

[Miah02]

Conversation leading up to the date.
About first kisses.

Does she seem could on the first date.

Was the first date a romantic date or not.
I'm not an expert on dating just know it is a horrible idea to treat everyone as if they will all like the same things.

[muscularbumblebee]

No.. well personally I never do even when I really like the person. Call me ‘modest’ or whatever but I don’t want men/whoever to get the wrong impression from a date. Only once did I kiss on a first date and that ended pretty badly so it’s individual I guess

[electromagnetic]

It really depends how well and comfortable you know and feel about that person. Personally I could never no matter the circumstances. But I don’t see anything wrong with it either.

[Gwenhwyfar]

Not always but if the date goes well sure. Night just be a soft peck on the lips though. Not a full kiss with tongue and everything.

[ChiTown33]

My personal opinion is "no". You got to Gage it by the situation. I mean if the date has been utter s***. Going in for a kiss is most likely NOT going to turn the entire thing around. Lol

[Ellie-V]

No. I don’t understand why people are comfortable doing this..

[ArrowheadSW]

In my life up to this point, I can't think of any instance where I kissed a woman on the first date. Although maybe once when I was around 25. I think most of the time it would make the woman uncomfortable.

[Hotboy_booblover]

I did it once and it was good.. it was like we both wanted it and it happened spontaneously.. it was good bcoz I had met her for the first time and didn't know her.. then we were together for few months after that

[NathanDavis]

No... kisses should not be forced

and there will definitely be times in which things just didn't work out, getting a half-assed kiss would amount to nothing worthy if that were the case

[Anonymous]

I think it’s best to wait and reserve it for later. If the girl wants the kiss already, she will want it even more later. And if she asks, you shouldn’t call her crazy, it kills confidence. If you don’t want to kiss, just say no and kindly say the reason why or if you want to give it more time.

[Wiredone]

I always asked the girl if I could kiss her before I did it. I didn't want to come off as being pushy or forceful

[Roserain]

Depends on how the date went. If you think the person is right, go for it but also you might wanna note how the person is open about intimacy. If it's a friend you very well know, thn even a peck myt change everything hehe x)

[DrHonesty]

Forget the date. Just make out. If she leaves, she's not what you were looking for anyway.

[dudeinohio]

Yes, if the date went well and you got a positive vibe.