Are dating apps a waste of time and money for 80% of men?

Question

Do you think dating apps are a waste of time for most men? as women clearly have an advantage when it comes to dating.

dhinchak · Accepted Answer

If a guy or woman were good enough, they wouldn't need dating apps tbh.

The apps are trash and below are the reasons why they don't work out:

In case of guys,

1. Nice guys who are average looking or below, have more chances at hitting it off in the real world because their pics would never attract a girl. Although I understand that they need to do a lot of work on a single girl just to get her interested, let alone dating, I still believe real world is the way to go for them.

2. Good looking nice guys would hit it off more often in the real world, so they wouldn't need dating apps. The same logic goes for good-looking and average looking women.

3. Good looking guys who are not nice are the only ones who would need to be and succeed on a dating app because of their pics, but that again is not going to work for the women they match with, just like in the real world.

In case of women, the ones with below average looks need to be on a dating app as they don't hit it off that easily in the real world, but since they wouldn't swipe on a nice average/below average looking guy, they're gonna match with the bad ones and come back with some bad stories of online dating like men who just want sex, or men who are narcissistic, etc.

Other women (also covered in point no. 2 above) are mostly there to increase their social media followers, so they're not keen on matching anyway.

Qdbrown · Accepted Answer

If any guy thinks he is using dating apps to his advantage, is an idiot. They are being extremely exploited. I am talking to the women who run online.

Sure, there is a small percentage of guys who are getting some serious action. But they are being sought after by many women. It's not widely known, but these women just on the outside will do dispictable things to mess up all the other girls vying for the gravy train dude. It's amazing how wicked people are, when they get desparate.

As for the other lucky ones, you will be prospected. They are not really looking for big d dude. They don't mind the experience, but women naturally graviate to guys who they are comfortable with and they perceive can care and defend. A woman will pick an ugly fat old dude if she feels really safe with the guy over a fickle low earning heartthrobe.
Most average to less should not waste their time with online dating. There is like 2,000 guys for every one real girl. The numbers are just not there for you. There are better ways to spend your time.

sagevalentineee · Accepted Answer

Well it's up to how you use it. I have a tinder profile, I put a long bio and my instagram username at the bottom. I'm not active though I never check it. My now boyfriend is probably the only person who looked long and attentively enough to find the username and message me on instagram. We went on a drinks date the next week and and also had sex on the first date.

He got me pretty good if you ask me - and I that's because he targeted me. Tinder (and other dating apps) encourage you to go through high volume, swiping on a lot of people, which is fine. But to be honest it's much better to persist on one person that you're really into. Trying to do a maximum and messaging 30 girls at once is super ineffective.

Of course improving yourself in other ways is going to help, you know, making yourself desirable by having the right skills and attributes etc.

Also I recommend a direct approach so she know what she's getting for example the:
Hey
Hey
what r u on this app for?
Like please no.

This is what he said to me:

Hey ___ sorry for sliding into your Dms so randomly but I saw your profile on tin and would like to take you out for a drink. Are you located in ___?

Simple, direct, I got the message, we met up and had a blast.

Xoxocutekitty · Accepted Answer

If 80% of men are using dating apps incorrectly, then probably they are a waste of time?

The great part of being a man in the dating world is that you get to decide who is attractive, then you can pursue them openly, assertively, and on your timeline.

If you want a traditional relationship, you can model that for her in how you talk to her, how you suggest or plan a first date, and how you of course treat her. Traditional women wanting a man to treat them a certain way, often cannot articulate 'I want a man to open doors for me, fully accepting a cook/clean tradeoff" without coming off as entitled as a first impression.

Men on dating apps, modern or traditional, often fall into the trap of taking any option, and then realizing they don't actually want the option for reasons that easily could have been avoided (she's too chubby, too tall, her face is meh etc).

Men as the active pursuer or even as the active reciprocator, should be more discretionary about who they want to invest their time in.

So yes, if you Swipe right indiscriminately and actively pursue people you don't find attractive, then yes you are using dating apps wrong and should duck out.

OlderAndWiser · Answer

What advantage do women have in dating?

I can't speak for anyone else but my own experience with dating sites was very positive. I used them in 2007-2008, 2005, 2017-2018, and in 2020. Every time, I met some quality women and eventually settled with one into a long term relationship.

waynezaz · Answer

Why would a guy spend money on it if he can spend the money on making him better? Be it better looking, better shaped, better intelligence, etc. Spending money on a dating app doesn't mean you're gonna get laid. You still are the same person. You need to improve everyday to become a better person, then you'll get noticed no need to spend money on an app for that.
As per the question about 20% of men are doing it (spending money, effort and time on themselves) to make them better than before.
So for the 80% of men need to adjust their lens and focus on what's more important.

JustinTimberlegs · Answer

If you're looking for hookups then yeah, women probably have an advantage, but for relationships I think it's equally bad for everyone, just in different ways.

It's harder for guys to get matches because of there's so many more guys competing for attention.

It's worse for girls because of the amount of creeps and stalkers and assholes and guys looking to get laid.

It's like if a guy got one date a month, but it would most likely be average vs. a female getting 10 dates a month, one is average and 9 are bad.

Then they also have to deal with guys that are creepy, like randomly turn up at their house or work or class and have their entire schedule memorised.

It just sucks for most people I think, not just guys.

Novacane · Answer

Yes, 100% of women love saying that it depends on how you use it but let's be honest as a man it doesn't matter how you use it if you are not good looking enough most of those women will not even pay attention to you. It is also statistically proven that way men rate women are more disperse vs the way women rate men. A man will be open to talking to someone they consider a 5-10 but for a woman, if you are not a 9 or 10 they don't won't even bother with you. Women are the gatekeepers to sex so in the end, they get to decide who can and who can't talk to them, and they will most likely always choose the 6ft+ guy with money and that's how it is. So as a man you either get your game up or your money up, women don't really have to do anything.

Lionman95 · Answer

I´d say yes because you´re judged by your looks no matter what you write in your bio. Because there are things that many people have commonly written there it´s of no real use.
Because many guys have written the same in there as you and have mistreated women anyways most women won´t be believe when you write such qualities as loyal/patient in there.
As long as you´re not rich have at least a well paid job don´t even try.
I don´t know how it is where you come from but I happened to communicate on dating apps often time with fake profiles that were installed to give the business going where people that weren´t interested in dating where paid to play a role of dating interested young woman.
So read the terms of service because many dating plattforms could use such bots.
Alltogether online dating is a highly costing waste of time.

Anonymous · Answer

Yes, because as a man even the tiniest flaw could break your chances on a dating app. The best way to illustrate this point is to look at the common standard of “only 6’+ men are allowed to pursue me.” Already that’s cutting out 85% of the male population if you live in the US… and let’s be honest, most men over 6’ don’t have to resort to using dating apps. Beyond that, is the man ugly? Does he have a small dick? Is his nose too big, too small, or does he have some other flaw? Very few men fit all of these standards, so if you’re one of those men dating apps will absolutely not be a waste of time. But yes, I’d say for at least 80% of men, dating apps are a waste of time.

BeenThereLovedIt · Answer

The biggest mistake people make is that they think in terms of what they are looking for or want rather than being what others are looking for.

Figure out what you have to offer, then figure out which site is most likely to have people looking for what you offer. If you are one of the people just looking for something, then you will see little to no success. If you are what other people are looking for, then success is just easy.

Anonymous · Answer

Not all women have an advantage----just like men on these apps, you're basically being judged about 95%+ on your looks at first so if you don't have 'the look,' odds are man or woman, you're getting passed over. I just don't think it's the best idea to do the app thing over a real interaction with someone at first, but it does work for some people. Sometimes it's luck, sometimes it's persistence, sometimes it's lightening in a bottle.

ToastyOats · Answer

Definitely a waste of money! Any woman that would expect a man to give money to a corrupt company to run a dating service is very short sighted and selfish. Job searches like indeed, dating services, video hosting (you tube) and all published college papers should be available to the public for free in their most accessible formats. A national socialist government would make this a top priority!

LeeannaDD · Answer

I didn't realize unsolicited dick pics were an advantage... maybe if 80% of men didn't treat them like they are ordering a prostitute and people are solely their for sex

oddwaffle · Answer

Yes.

You either have no money and should look for work or have too much money and women will fly to you. If you are some middling dude with some money but not enough for a good life then you are just waiting to get scammed by these companies.

Avicenna · Answer

They are a waste for younger men, especially because of the endemic hypergamy most younger women on these apps are notorious for. For guys in their 40s and older, it probably works better.

Astarlessnightsky · Answer

No, the chance are probably the same to meet a women, but at least you can get rejected in the comfort of your own home.

godfatherfan · Answer

Nope. I don't know about young people, but it is the only way I would ever be able to meet anyone. I work from home, on midnight's. I don't go to church and I don't belong to any clubs.

Anonymous · Answer

Go after girls in real life. They are so overwhelmed getting hit up online all the time it will be a breath of fresh air to talk to a real guy for her. Don't hit on her unless there's instant chemistry where you practically jump on each other. Just friendly conversation to start.

jshm2 · Answer

To be honest. They are actually chat apps and hookup apps, rather than "dating apps". They put themselves down as that only so they fall the right side of various laws.

DJB72 · Answer

I met my wife on one 20 years ago so no, I don't think they're a waste. Unless you're just looking for a quick fuck, in which case you're the waste, not the site...

Adam1978 · Answer

Certainly a waste of money, most likely you will spend more time for less result then if you actually went out in real life.

kyleelyn199723 · Answer

I think it’s no different than having Instagram or Facebook. You meet new people on there and have a chance of hitting it off with someone.

Siren777 · Answer

Waste of time for someone looking for commitment but great for people who don't want commitment.

ThatNoUVAtYourEyes · Answer

They are chokets full of fake profiles.
I am trying to get the governments to issue Internet authenticators, so you know who is a real person and who is fake (from buying oroperty or a car to dating online - the offline world is full of threats)

This_Is_My_Opinion8 · Answer

I used it for a while when I was single. I was direct and admitted in my bio I was just looking for a hook-up. I didn't get 100 matches. But I got a few. And since they already knew what I was in for a few was all I needed.

K-I-S-S · Answer

Yes, unless you look half decent and have pics of you living the instagrammers wet dream life.   Real world, organic meeting is best for both.

es20490446e · Answer

Totally, for all men. It's way easier to get a girl to trust you to date you in real life, just because she can see you.

Anonymous · Answer

Yes. It’s meant to make things easier but it has the lock-on effect of also making women insanely selective and/or ego-boosted. So the use of the product a new aspect of the problem it attempts to solve.

nickaboy · Answer

As I am on 3 dating apps and have 0 matches. Yes it is a waste of time. When you aren't a 11/10 you have 0 chance not even with 2/10 girls

rcljr · Answer

Yes, half the accounts are bots, men have to pay for an account and women get them free.

Slartybartfast · Answer

Worse, they crush a guys self esteem making it difficult to approach women in real life.

Anonymous · Answer

Its like paying for a prostitution but taking longer time. Lol

BladeStormz · Answer

Dating apps are a waste of time for both genders. Just go out do what you love eventually someone with the same tastes will take interest.  But yes for men it is a huge waste of time.

Anonymous · Answer

Definitely! Not a question. Almost all women use dating apps for validation and likes without the intention of finding love. Those insecure little girls.

Feelicks · Answer

I've tried paying for tinder, it's actually worked out well for me but I'd still rather not pay. I guess it depends on how hard up you are.

Chthou95 · Answer

Yeah most are. If you're average & below average looking, you best delete those apps. Only very attractive guys get matches. So ditch the apps and try in person but remember to do whst i told you

Anonymous · Answer

I have used those applications but have never spent money on them.

Iron_Man · Answer

I think so you get a bunch of scammers asking if you have hang outs

KrakenAttackin · Answer

Women have always had the advantage in person and on dating apps. Legions of Simps will always ensure the gynocracy is safe.

Anonymous · Answer

Dating in general is a waste of time for the average guy. Women are hypergamous, they only love and value the top percentage of men. Even if an average guy gets a chance, he needs to remember he's just a placeholder/potential provider for her

Anonymous · Answer

Yes. Majority of women dont use such apps. Majority of users of such apps are men

Anonymous · Answer

Yeah, I've through most of them over the years and wouldn't run out of fingers to count all my matches

Luopio27 · Answer

I dint trust them. Online, anyone can pretend to be someone else.

CantGetItUp · Answer

I’ve had no luck on them. Women are very picky and if you’re not in that top 10 percent it’s not going to be easy.

AnthonyJ01 · Answer

Dating apps are a joke. Just a way to throw away money.

TheAfrikan · Answer

It depends on which app n which people YOU happen to encounter.

Anonymous · Answer

Meeting these days is very hard for some this is only option

White_Boy_506 · Answer

Yes. There’s been studies showing the algorithms are statistically rigged against men.

Anonymous · Answer

If it is, then it just proves men are dumb enough to keep on using them

Anonymous · Answer

yes, women should have to pay and men should get the app for free

MzAsh · Answer

Not if you’re a quality guy who is patient.

connemara_crocodile · Answer

If so, I belong to the 20%

Anonymous · Answer

a youtuber said that 75% of the people on them are men

slatyb · Answer

Match. com worked for my wife and me.

ForgottenFuRyan · Answer

If you have to ask...

karaspara · Answer

Yes and most women as well

DeltaCharlieEcho · Answer

Dating apps are a waste of time for 100% of men.

msc545 · Answer

Absolutely a waste of time and money for ALL men.

Aphrodite801 · Answer

I think that bothered lames like you are annoying

dudeinohio · Answer

Just takes time and persistence. They can work.

Twalli · Answer

It shouldn't be a waste of money

captain_voidwalker · Answer

Its a waste of time and money for 100% of men.

LoveIsFake · Answer

100% because it's about looks

Are dating apps a waste of time and money for 80% of men?

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