Is being a side chick ever a good idea?

[Anonymous]

There’s this guy at work who likes me but he’s in a serious relationship with his girlfriend who also works the same shift as us and at the same place. So one day I was heading to the back to go get something and he wanted to kiss me even though his girlfriend was working with us that day also be she was doing something on the other side of the building. Then there’s this one time I was was working on something in the back and he was behind me leaning against a table and out of the corner of my eye I caught him checking me out and his girlfriend was either working on something at the front of the building or working on something on the other side of the building.

[Finchie40]

If you like the fact of being used and a convenience and don’t want a serious relationship then do what you wish , but it more than likely is going to backfire especially the fact that you all work together makes it crazier if his girlfriend finds out , so be prepared to deal with a lot of drama and probably jeopardizing your job if shit hits the fan. The fucked up thing is that poor girl doesn’t realize she is in a relationship with a piece of shit cheater and how do you work with her and look her in the face knowing you are screwing her boyfriend? People do crazy shit to others , why this world is so fucked up. Honestly you should stop sleeping with him and tell him it’s over , the fact he is In a relationship should be your reason not to sleep with him anymore , How would you feel if you were In a relationship and your partner was screwing other girls on the side? I don’t think you would be to happy about it and be devastated , find a guy that is single that doesn’t want a serious relationship just sex , there are plenty of them out there

[Floppy2112]

The more you are a side chick, the more you will stay a side chick. But some of you women would rather be the side chick of a guy you cannot ultimately have, over a guy you can have but doesn't meet your instagram expectations.
Social media is a fake world. It's pretend, but with twist. It generates real emotions and that's what makes it dangerous.
You really think you can have that guy in L. A. when you live in Newark, so you won't even look at the guys in Newark, because social media made you believe the story it tells. But that story isn't real, none of it is. It's all pretend and people only let you see what they want you to see. So it's a massively skewed version of reality that way too many people fall for at the peril of actual reality.
So if you want to be a side chick, because you think that guy is so great, go ahead. Just know that if you are, nobody will take you seriously and vet you for marriage later on. Once a toy, always a toy.

[DeltaCharlieEcho]

Oh hypergamy thy name is envy.

[Jesibel]

Never and I mean never is it a good idea. You'll do nothing but get hurt and constantly be knee deep in drama. Never allow yourself to be a second choice or option. If someone is worthy of you and truly gives a damn about you then you will be there one and only choice. Respect and love yourself enough not to allow yourself to be treated less then by nobody. You got to hold you and your standards and what you allow to be done to you at high standards cuz if you don't you can't expect anybody else to. But that's just my opinion.

[Cynicaldreamer]

No. Why don't you think highly enough of yourself to think you deserve a guy that only wants you?

You know if he's trying to mess with you, he's probably flirting with other women too. I feel so bad for his girlfriend! She's oblivious to that cheating scum.

A side chick means you're not good enough to be his main woman- do you want or deserve to be his "backup" or "seconds?" NO.

Leave that scum alone.

[OlderAndWiser]

If you enjoy being jealous, frustrated, and having low self-esteem, side-chick is definitely the way to go!

[hahahmm]

Yes.. IF you were a secret CIA type agent looking to get military secrets from a guy, you might have to pretend to be his whore to do it. But you would get a medal and a promotion when your mission is completed.

You're not that person. There's no good reason for you to mess with this guy. It could even cost you your life if him or his girlfriend are the types to kill side pieces. It happens & you'll never know in advance if this couple are that type. You could also lose your job. May not seem like a big deal now but as you get older jobs become more important. Best idea is to build good habits now so you do the right thing later.

Don't even flirt with this guy. Also DO NOT say anything judgmental to him like, "you have a girlfriend" because now that you've played (a little) with him he could take that as a threat that you will tell his girlfriend. Just ignore him and don't make friends with his girlfriend either.

[Ninjazzed]

Nope, because he will drop you eventually. Most of the time he’s using you and/or lying to you.

Don’t fall for the crock of shit, move on. Know your worth and save yourself for someone who values you more than just for a piece of ass.

In these situations, he’ll always fall back on the wife to avoid the fallout of divorce. Either he wants to stay with his wife due to financial reasons or he’s fucking you both at the same time while just wanting something new to mess with, it would be the side chick in this case.

[Explorer91]

Up to you, just know you aren’t the only side girl he is flirting with. It’s very common to want to be a side person coz of the way it feeds your ego. But when you realise. He flirts and wants sex with any woman he can.. you realise it’s not such an ego hit after all and it’s not worth it anymore.
so picture that, your not a special side person he desires, it’s just that you are one of the few people who will be with him. And any girl who is half decent who will be with him he will be with.. coz that is the reality.

[Jersey2]

There is some raw truth in what you say.

[Explorer91]

@Jersey2 yea it helps to be able to break free of dysfunction I find when you can see it for what it is, if you glamorise it and make it more appealing for your ego your more likely to make a bad choice but if the bad choice doesn’t even appeal to the ego anymore what’s the point.

[Pasiton5]

Now off you continue to keep quiet about his behavior you no different than he is, by saying doing nothing your just condoning his actions and say he leaves his girl get with you do you really I mean really think this buster is going to be committed to you only you, sit you better go tell his flame to keep her hound away from you or you can go say hi to him in jail after you file harassment charges on his wanna be a player ass, you don't tolerate this kind of behavior unless your starved for attention, it's punks like this that makes good dudes like me work that much harder for a honey to believe me when I say I'm not a cheat, so don't put up with this clown tell his ass to get lost forever punk,

[Interstate]

In the first place, LEAVE HIM BE IF HE IS INVOLVED. Secondly, if you take up with this guy, you are an OPTION, not a priority. But the fact that he wanted to kiss you, despite the fact the Girlfriend was there, says he has that much nerve to try this with her there, or it is an open-relationship. Something else to consider is there may be OTHER "side chicks". If I were you, I would tell the Girlfriend, and let her handle it from there. But also, I would report it to the shift Supervisor. That conduct on the clock is unprofessional (to say the least). It is quite clear he has no respect for Women, and he obviously thinks he is God's gift to Women. Just keep your distance, tell both the Supervisor and Girlfriend, and move on with life.

[Ronald_25]

From dating side chicks who were dating guys in relationships, there is only one benefit I can derive. If you want to have fun with a guy who is boyfriend material, then side chick is perfect, because you get to have lots of fun and sex, but don't need to enter long term relationship. There are a couple of things to keep in mind though, you must date two or more guys as casual relationship to avoid getting clinging, and you need avoid falling in love with the boyfriend. The problem arises when the side chick gets clingy and jealous, and wants to go from side chick to main girlfriend. This causes many problems. Either look for a proper boyfriend by saying you want long term relationship. Or keep all relationships casual, there is no in-between, otherwise people get hurt.

[nella965]

if he liked you, you would be his new girlfriend, not his new side chick

[Asker]

I failed to mention that he has a son with his girlfriend, so with have something to do with him wanting me to be his side chick instead of his new girlfriend?

[nella965]

go ahead and lie to yourself that any man would do something like that. If you don't believe me, try it out and you will get hurt.

[Jazquee]

Omg... they have a kid!!! Jesus lady what are you thinking don't be a life destroyer
So sad

[nella965]

@Jazquee it’s not other people’s responsibility to protect your marriage. It’s your responsibility to protect your own marriage. Nobody can ruin your marriage without your husbands permission

[Jazquee]

It's her responsibility not to be a slut

[nella965]

@Jazquee thats not her marriage. she doesn't have to care about your marriage.

[Jazquee]

Why do you keep saying "my" marriage. This isn't my post

[nella965]

@Jazquee all I'm saying is, you can't rely on other people to protect your marriage.

[Jazquee]

Still confused. U should be able to trust others not to be scandalous. I guy you know in a relationship with a kid... I Good person would tell him to get fucked

[nella965]

@Jazquee that’s kinda like saying , you should be able to trust every stranger on the street to watch your purse as you use the bathroom.
Not everyone out there is gonna give your purse back to you. You can’t rely on other people to protect your belongings.

It’s the same as saying that you expect strangers to tell you If you have dropped a hundred dollars on the street. Sure you may have dropped it and it’s the right thing for strangers to give it back to you. But not everyone is gonna give it back to you. You can’t rely on other people with your 100 dollar bill

[nella965]

@Jazquee there’s nothing confusing about any of this. It’s just that you have idealistic expectations of the world. You think that nobody cheats , nobody steals.

You’re the type to believe that if you dropped 1000 on the street , all the strangers are gonna return you the money.

Trust me , if most people found 1000 on the street , they won’t give it back to you

[Jazquee]

Wow... your really pushing your case lol
I give up 🤷

[HumbleMike]

If you like constant drama and potential heart break in your life, then sure, you can give it a try lol


No seriously, don’t do it, it doesn’t even sound like you’re not even that into this asshole. You can do so much better than him, you have to love yourself too.

[Anonymous]

Telling you from my experience. He's a piece of shit. It's worse than being single. You're going to be a downgrade. He'll chose the main chick and you'll feel used. If he choses, you're going to be in a constant anxiety because he can cheat on you as well. Once a cheater, always a cheater.

[anniisa97]

This girls also a piece of shit herself. She's still considering getting involved with a man thats taken. Are there no other men available or something?

[K-I-S-S]

Exactly, pretty much sounds like two scum found each other.

[pleasestopthis]

@K-I-S-S Harsh but very true

[JustAnj]

Just go up to the girlfriend and ask if her and her man have an open relationship and if she says yes then tell her you would like to get involved with her man if not then have balls and tell her that her man needs to stop harassing your ass then. 🤷

He will leave you alone after that if they are not open or you could just kick him in the nutter next time for making you out to be a hoe.

[ChrisMaster69]

It’s a case of what you are thinking about doing now, in 6 months another girl will do with him and you will be the cast off.

it’s really meh messing with couples, he sounds a right piece of work ready to cheat.

If anything go for it and tell his girlfriend.

as she really needs to know who she is dating.

it gets messy quickly

[ZackBan]

So 4 billion men out there and so many of them decent people with no girlfriends and you decide to fall for the one who has.

I can't blaim you many of us have done the same, but it doesn't change the fact that you're looking to drink from someone else's cup and that's not gonna end well for you. Just find someone else don't give him the time of day.

Or if you feel adventurous charm his girlfriend in return

[DellBell]

No please no! I got cheated on and now I'm mentally destroyed and can't even trust my current partner because I'm scared that he will betray me like my ex did and I get badly triggered. This poor woman you have to tell her! Please think of her and her mental wellbeing. This guy has no respect for women and it clearly shows.

[raw_is_war99]

Please don’t do it. People have to respect other people being taken. Something really ugly could come from this where you guys including yourself could lose your job. I don’t know if there are cameras around, if there is things are being recorded. I hate guys who act like this because nothing is good enough for them. If you value guys who are loyal and faithful, don’t mess with this dude. I feel bad for the girl in this because she probably doesn’t know all the rat boy shit he’s doing.

[Smoke-n-Growls]

Never a good idea.

Are you a side dish or a main dish?

If he really does like you, he'd give you his full attention like you deserve.

But instead, he thinks you're a convenient distraction he believes he can hide from his real girlfriend.

Why let yourself be disrespected like that?

[PeacefulRainDrop]

No id stay clear of that a disaster waiting to happen your better off with them.. work your job he asks for a kiss tell him he has a girlfriend for that and to fuck off he's not worth your time.. if you were his girl hed try and get someone else unless sharing your man and being shared is appealing to you... each to their own

[PeacefulRainDrop]

Yeah no.. no one has that money to throw away..

[Alwayreckles93]

Honey he doesn't like you he wants you as a sex object which is two different things if he really liked you he would live his current girlfriend for you that isn't really the case here just so you know. I'm not trying to be rude just saying from what you are telling me. Please have self respect for yourself!

[Hulk30]

there's alotta layers to that specific cake basically in monagamous situations it's wrong to be a side and based on female nature bein a side for em dont work like it does for males based on the fact that males do things based on logic and codes females do things based on emotions also it's too easy for females to catch feelins and if the side chick looks better than the main most likely they're gonna wanna replace the main as well also it's very likely if males will cheat with ya they'll cheat on ya as well

[DarkWinterNights]

Terrible idea in general. Even worse if you all work together. It’s an HR nightmare. If he decides to leave his girl for you, he’ll just end up leaving you for his next side girl.

[artsygirl457]

never and will never end well. even if he would leave her do you really think he would ever be faithful to you? dont get caught up in the drama my girl, there is someone better out there for you

[molonski2]

Its absolutely fine , not all is black / white , in basis you get the great sex , no responsibility , your young , enjoy your life , dont listen to the naysayers , take it , enjoy the benefits and the ultimate feeling , of being " the other woman " , its exciting , its doesn't have to be dramatic rubbish as others have said , this is the utter essence of life , variety is the spice of life , enjoy it.

[Jazquee]

Your a horrible person...

[molonski2]

Some people dislike reality , and honesty. She knows the circumstance , and asked the question?
I answered honestly , not just the Status Quo bs

[Jazquee]

Telling someone it's fine to destroy someone else... no one deserves to be cheated on... that is fucked up

[molonski2]

Its not destruction its reality , the concept of " life " is ludicrous , she's asking the question because its her issue , her thought , its not me , Im just telling her the truth. You know the percentages on this stuff? Im not inviting her over , just calling it like it is.
The OP will obviously decide for herself , plenty of women in this circumstance , and men of course. Life is never black / white , its many shades of Grey.

[Explorer91]

She isn’t just the other woman. She’s probably one of many other women. I have never known someone to cheat with only one person.. unless that’s all they can get. Lol.

[molonski2]

@Explorer91
Who cares? How much time you think this guy has? Its a free country , she asked a question received an honest answer.

[SunnyFlorida]

It is never a good idea to be in a love triangle. There have been too many cases where the side-chick gets murdered, usually after regular girlfriend finds out and "requires" the boyfriend to murder the side-chick as proof-of-love. One such case happened close to where I was living; burned her body at a church parking lot in the middle of the night. They caught the two idiots who did it. Victim was Katie Ann Brunelle, murdered on Dec 22, 2007. Its a bad idea to be a side-chick.

[comekitty]

If it were me, I wouldn't want to play somebody's second best. Even if he broke up with his girlfriend, I still wouldn't bite. A snake can shed its skin but in the end its just a bigger snake. But maybe that's just me.

[Browneye57]

Only if you're okay with being 'second-fiddle', and if she finds out she's liable to beat your ass. And the fact that he's a cheating loser of a jerk, and just wants to fuck the both of you.
Otherwise, being informed is being armed, I guess. Good luck.

On the other hand, why don't you find a really great guy that isn't already hitched to someone? You can't? Or you won't? I find your choices to be in poor taste, ill-informed, naive, and just plain dumb.

[raton21]

Do you want just a sex with him?

If yes, it's shitty thing to do, but If I were concerned only about myself, I would go for it..

So you want serious relationship with him?

With someone who flirts with other girls while in relationship?

[rienna888]

No it’s never good to be a side chick, it’s very important that you respect your self. It’s a waste of time, this dude is living his best life with two women and you don’t want that. While you suffer in envy and the other woman doesn’t know she’s dating a cheater and that the man doesn’t have all her interest

[SnakeBoop]

No, and being the side chick knowingly would make you a piece of shit. Avoid him.

[anniisa97]

He doesn't like you. He's most likely been doing this with multiple women throughout their relationship, and you seem desperate enough to want the attention. Learn to respect yourself.

[anniisa97]

He just wants someone to boost his ego on the side, if he didn't want his girlfriend he wouldn't be with her. He wants her, he has future plans with her if theyre serious. He would never leave her for a girl that has no standards, who is perfectly fine to be a side chick.

[Hairylegs222]

Shouldn't help a cheater cheat. Not saying you are but it might go in that direction. I'd never do that in a relationship, it's disloyal and disrespectful to your woman.

[succubus_girl]

if you can emotionally handle it then yes, otherwise no

[Jazquee]

Sad how many people forget the world LOYALTY

[Subarugirl]

Absolutely not under any circumstances is it a good idea.

[Dazed0N0Confused]

1. No it isn't
2. Both you & him are assholes for considering this
3. You should tell her about this so she can find someone who is REALLY going to love her
4. Find your OWN man

[Jazquee]

All very valid points 🙌

[thimmslicc]

Its never a good idea.
you're choosing to be 2nd
You want to be 2nd to his everything.
You will never be first.
It won't end well.
Sorry but you're just as dirty as he is.
Karma will bite you in the ass.

[EssenceOfLight]

Being the number two for a short time span just to become number one is acceptable, but if it last for too long you will be degraded to being useful. For a guy is this acceptable because you get what you want from such sidekick relationships without any accountability, but time isn't girls friend and the risk is very high you land permanently on the sidetrack.

[LingyRolls]

It can be fun as long as you don't put any real value in it other than sex and the excitement of it. It turns me on knowing he was turned on and chose to have fun with me over his girlfriend. It's the ultimate compliment.

[Jazquee]

That's gross... karma has all sorts of surprises for your type

[LingyRolls]

No karma complication here. She knew about it. She liked getting cucked by him. Lots of people enjoy getting cucked.

[Anonymous]

No, unless you like that he only use you when main girl is occupied, with something else...

He will only use you for short bedroom fun at the best.

In the end you will lose both of them, as she will eventually find out about it and will hate you and he will hate you for letting her know...

[TessCasie]

Bad very bad
Don’t wanna be someone’s second lol

[TessCasie]

Why is their downvote for this by a man huh 🤔

[MindYourEyes]

If you wanna be nasty left overs go for it. But hey would you want your man to have a side chick if it was serious? And if you guys want each other then tell him to dump Her. The poor girl.

[LeoElias]

Surprised to see a woman wanting to screw over another woman. What happen to women having each others backs? Is being a whore with a guy who doesn't even respect you more important than being a good person with dignity?

[anniisa97]

Imagine working with your long term partner and another employee while they kiss when you turn your back. How disrespectful can you get. People like OP normally don't find good partners or good stable relationships. They don't deserve it either

[midnightmoon05]

no it’s not a good idea.

How would you feel if you became his girlfriend and he has a side chick?

[dillbill561]

Don’t do it. Tell his girlfriend though in a non-confronting way. You will regret doing the wrong thing but feel good for doing the right thing. And please go for better guys there are plenty out there

[Lillie_xo]

well !! no ! you're not doing any good for them or yourself ! in my opinion at least ! (^∇^)

[Anonymous]

So he's obviously a cheating piece of shit. Just know that if you choose to be his "side chick" then you are every bit as big a piece of shit as he is.

[Jazquee]

Yay... nicely stated

[FilmGuy93]

No. It has literally never once in the history of humanity ever been a good idea.

[420Rachel]

Um... Use your brain and it's pretty easy to figure out if it's a good idea or not.

[Still-alive]

Hmmmm

Hmmmmmmmmmmmm

No? 😬

[420Rachel]

Lmfao 🤣

[MotorcycleMan]

Sounds like a recipe to lose you friends and job at the same time.

[Clarke498]

I never understood it. Why would you date a guy that's comfortable with cheating. Says a lot about you (if you were to actually do that)

[Eva2015]

No, in fact it is never a good idea. It will only cause pain. Just stay away from guys in relationships.

[pleasestopthis]

No. It means you're only second option and discardable when he gets caught. No woman with self respect likes to be a side chick

[Minamikun]

No, it isn't
Unless if both of them are polyamorous

That situation happened to my friend and she gave up of him because he didn't want to break up with her girlfriend

[Anonymous]

Please do it bitch
I really want you to experience being cheated on
Karma exists LMAO

[GenaBaby1995]

A long as you know ur both using each other for a limited time, go for it!

[loves2learn]

He sounds like a real untrustworthy loser. I feel sorry for his girlfriend.

[Anonymous]

If you’re asking us that means you’re already headed in the wrong direction. I would advise against it. He’s going to give you the cold shoulder after u fuck and will probably ghost you.

[Biancam13]

No because if he actually liked you enough, you would be his main and only chick.

[spartan55]

Yeah sure, give it a try and see how it goes... 😂 😂

[bamesjond0069]

Well i have a girlfriend and a second girlfriend but they know about and are supportive of each other. So if y'all get the ok sure go for it. If you just being sneaky, nah you just going to end up w a ton of drama.

[Ninani]

It can be fun if you're not looking for deeper emotional connection and reliability.

[Jazquee]

Can be fun to destroy another person..🤔🥺

[Ninani]

He's the one destroying their relationship, either with me or someone else.

[888theGreat]

you are just an evil person with no morals

[Ninani]

I have morals, just not the same as yours.

[888theGreat]

your morals are immorals

[Ninani]

No, they are natural desires.

[888theGreat]

Oh, so you just an animal like a dog in heat

[Ninani]

We're all animals. It's unhealthy to deny it.

[888theGreat]

We are different or supposed to be. We can reason and think. Well some of us can.

[Ninani]

Some animals can too. But apparently we can't accept our primal desires and get butthurt claiming to be monogamous, when we are biologically meant to have several partners. Clinging to an ideal that is against our nature isn't morals, it's stupidity.
I don't break up relationships, I'm the "side chick" to open relationships. Nobody gets hurt with open communication.

[888theGreat]

You are foolish

[Ninani]

Really, because I can think for myself and not blindly follow outdated, restricting societal norms?

[888theGreat]

Actions that damage institutions and society

[Ninani]

Actions that goes against the collective control.

[888theGreat]

Your soul is dead

[Ninani]

It's probably more alive than your oppressed one.

[888theGreat]

Nope , I play it safe and I have no worries. You don't and never know when that last guy just killed you.

[Ninani]

If I die that's it. Won't affect me afterwards. If he does anything to harm me short of killing me I can report him.

[888theGreat]

Yea, but you would go to Hell. A terrible price to pay for a little fun

[Ninani]

Good thing hell doesn't exist. Another ruse to control you.

[888theGreat]

Keep thinking that. You are in for a rude awaking.

[Ninani]

So are you 😘

[Jazquee]

Wow @Ninani you really faught hard here to prove your not a souless whore... no one buying it...

[888theGreat]

@Jazquee Her life is a pathway to self destruction, unfortunately she is going to take a lot of others down with her.

[Jazquee]

Like some poor in expecting commited loving girlfriend...

[Jazquee]

(un-expecting)

[Ninani]

Must feel great to put all the blame on other people.

[Ninani]

Even Jesus accepted a whore at his table. Which part of this makes you loving and worthy people? If you truly believe in hell, then you know that this is what paves your road to it.

[Jazquee]

You are the cause and effect... women like you are the reason men have the option to cheat. Karma is a bitch and sooner or later she will find you...
I hope you grow up and settle down fall madly in love with the perfect man... have kids and a dog buy a house then come home early from work one day to find your husband fucking a side chick in your bed... that would truly be poetic justice

. hey not her fault right? He is the one doing it...👍

[Jazquee]

And I don't believe in "heaven " or "hell"
I believe in good and evil and you are pure evil
Even the Budda would weep for your soul

[Jazquee]

What do you think @loves2learn this chick? Trying to rationalize being a nasty hole wreaking slut... any thoughts?

[loves2learn]

@ninani your advice to the asker isn’t very sound. Being a homewrecker and perpetuating dishonesty is never good.

If people choose to have honest open relationships that is one thing. More power to them. But it kinda sounds like you are backpedaling your poor advice here.

[Blueeyes81]

If 2nd place is what you strive for than sure it could be a good deal. For a normal person its never a good deal.