Have you ever dated someone so long distance that you had to fly to see them or vice versa?

Question

MrOracle · Accepted Answer

No, but when I was 20 I dated a girl for a year and drove 240 miles each way every weekend to see her, before moving to be with her. Never again.

I can't say this often enough: DATE LOCALLY (ONLY)!

The whole point of dating someone is to spend time with them, NOT to spend time with your phone. I strongly recommend not dating anyone who can't get to you, or vice versa, within 15 minutes. Otherwise, you won't be able to see each other enough and that's going to cause problems for you.

It's one thing if you are married and have a strong commitment and one of you has to be away for work, military deployment, or to care for a family member or something, but even that is dangerous to the relationship, and that's with a strong commitment!

Studies have shown that when you are apart for more than about 90 days, your brain's grieving mechanism kicks in and starts to emotionally separate you from the other person, which destroys your motivation to maintain the massive effort needed to sustain a long distance relationship.

Be smart and only date locally!

MCheetah · Accepted Answer

Yes. I had a LDR with a girl from England, who was briefly living in the US, but went back to England. This was the wealthy, crazy, sociopathic, older lady in her early 30s, who I briefly mentioned before. Though I wouldn't consider a LDR to be a real, actual relationship. She had the means to fly to the US on the weekend, whenever she wanted, as her parents were worth tens of millions of dollars as pharmaceutical execs. But she still never did. It was "too much work" for her. And mind you, this was before COVID. Ah, she was crazy anyway, so I didn't care about her too much.

lilyanony1 · Accepted Answer

I had a boyfriend in Turkey I planned to visit him but my mum stopped me from going. She insisted he wasn't genuine and put the fear into me that he was going to kidnap me or something silly.
Knowing I don't make friends so easily and speak so little Turkish I really didn't want to end up stranded if something went terribly wrong.

I don't think things would have gone that way but I panicked because a month after I cancelled my trip he started to try to convert me to Islam sending all this stuff about the prophet mohammed and talking about the kurdish people and sounded really angry.

I had met his parents over Skype prior and his sister they were really sweet especially his sister who I spoke to every now and then.
He tried to commit suicide 3 weeks after we broke up. His sister called me. I was devastated.

He was spiralling. I sensed something was up before I cancelled my trip but i thought it was his desperation to see me.
He was in the military 18-21. I Don't think it did him any good.

susie22 · Accepted Answer

My boyfriend lives about 230 miles away, and we both have weird work schedules, so we make things work by either driving or flying to be together when we get a few days. I'm fortunate that my job allows me access to aircraft, that makes things a lot easier.

ludorock · Answer

Yes. My partner and I lived nearly 3,000 miles apart for three years. We say each other for a long weekend every other month. I was in the military so if I ever left the area (even on weekends and holidays) I had to take leave, so he always came to visit me, but we split the airfare cost.

We are still happily married and very much in love, but I would never willingly do that again. It was awful.

Brainsbeforebeauty · Answer

Nope. Don't do long distance dating...

KieranByrne · Answer

I am currently 'Talking' to someone who lives in Ukraine, we say 'Morning' and 'Good night' we do also check to see how each others day's are going, and if each other are both OK!
I would not call it 'Dating' as such, more 'wishing the best' or keeping an eye out for one another!

If things change, then it will be kind of hard, but there is always trouble when 'Dating' long distance!

We do not send 'nudes' or anything like that! Strictly messaging, and if the day ever arise of talking on the phone, or face to face meeting. I hope the person is whom they say they are!

Going cold is tough, but the person is quite 'Intellectual'

Thank you for your question!

Jamie05rhs · Answer

I would not be willing to "fly" to see someone on a regular basis, because I am an environmentalist and I do not wish to contribute to pollution. I personally feel okay with flying on an airplane every once in a while (maybe once a year or less), but I don't want to make a habit of it.

If I fall in love with someone who lives across the country, and if it's a one-time thing to meet her to see if we like each other in person, then I will fly. But that is something I would do on only a rare occasion and a special circumstance.

I live in the Mid-Atlantic (DC region), so there are many cities that are medium-distance away from me and that have airports that I could easily catch a flight to. However, I would rather drive there, just because I think that has less of a carbon footprint.

Jxy95 · Answer

Yeah... it was very hard. My ex and I were 9000 miles/14000km apart! I liked him and didn't mind flying 21 hrs to see him. But I guess it all got too hard, he wanted someone close by and not someone living so far away. After we broke up for a while, he messaged me again saying he missed me but by that time I already have a boyfriend. I guess if it weren't the distance we could of been happily living together. We both agreed some distance would of been fine, but not 9000 miles away...

msc545 · Answer

Yes, I have. A few years back I was living in Los Angeles, and I met a woman from Mexico City at a party, and we really hit it off and spent about a month together. Sadly, though, she had a business in Mexico City and could not move to the US, and I had a practice in Los Angeles and could not move to Mexico City. So we spoke on the phone a lot, and every other weekend I would fly to Mexico City and spend 3 or 4 days with her. Mexico City is *great*! She would occasionally come to LA, but we both liked Mexico better. We traveled all over Mexico when we had vacation time which we took together. In the end, we didn't work out, but for about 18 months life was very good for me. I never minded the travel at all.

tilmyheadblows · Answer

I met my partner online in a gaming group. He lived in the same continent, on the opposite side in another country. We met irl twice and now we're married and live together.

LikeALog · Answer

Yes, my job required frequently visiting the small city she lived in. It was a two hour flight and an hour and a half drive. After that job was completed, I flew there as often as I could. Eventually, we decided that she should move and join me. We are happily married now.

BossThe2nd · Answer

Yes, I dated two such people in my life. But I was working as an external contractor, so every time I just stayed in the country for the maximum duration allowed for me as a non-citizen (3 months).

exitseven · Answer

I dated somebody for 3 years that lived 1500 miles away. I drove the first time I visited her but flew after that. She took the bus once when she saw me but flew the other times.

friendlypelican · Answer

im currently in this situation. we live 14,000 km apart. we are doing really well actually covid is making it hard to go see him but other than that both of us are happy.

Gwenhwyfar · Answer

Actually yes a long time ago he lived in Chicago when I was in law school. Didn’t last that long. And a boyfriend in Austria back in high school but he flew in to see me.

Aethereal · Answer

I'm doing that now. I'd have moved to her country by now if not for the pandemic, and the fact that her country is closed to non-essential travel i. e. no tourists.

menina · Answer

No. But at this point if I wanted to date it would have to be a long distance relationship since I can't date local men.

Prettygurl12 · Answer

While we were engaged, my husband was in the UK while I was in the US but that was only for a few months... but I guess it counts lol

NathanDavis · Answer

nope, not my style... well, not my payroll... I can't afford private jets on a weekly basis, lmao

girlinthemirror · Answer

Yes i did. I met my boyfriend in my country, after several years he had to go back to usa and we tried to get us visa for me, but something went wrong and i didn't get it twice, so we met twice a year in some warm countries for several weeks.

Anonymous · Answer

No but if I ever do I hope he’s loyal asf and would do that for me.

AviatorTom · Answer

Fly? NO. I did date a girl when I was much younger who was a 3-hour drive away. It was a nice summer fling. Didn't last beyond that.

jekyllhyde · Answer

Yup. Went to the east coast the first time. Another relationship I went to the other side of the world. Got manipulated and used. Not stretching my neck for that particular reason anymore.

Kreneman · Answer

Yes, I have been dating my girlfriend for 4 years and she lives in Africa. I went there twice and I proposed to her on my second trip.

DizzyDesii · Answer

Yea. I like to fly anyways. Its like the best sleep evaaaa

DarkCarousel · Answer

No. I dated someone 5 hours away and we took turns driving to each other.

FreyaRed · Answer

No. Male population is not that tragic here I had to date someone on another continent.

Friendlyexperienced · Answer

Yes, but because I love to drive, I drove to her and she drove to me. 10hr drive one way.

Lucy68 · Answer

I have done a long distance before but I have not done one where it was international

Joshua0213 · Answer

I did yeah and still with her today, never flew to her though but she came here a lot then 2 years ago I bought a house near where she lived and we live together

Ironic_Method · Answer

Yes. My now wife started on opposite ends of the country. If you both want it bad enough you can make it work. LDRs are tough though.

Wiredone · Answer

The furthest distance between me and my exes was 2 towns. I would never date someone who l had to take a plane to see.

Andres77 · Answer

My wife. Engaged for a year. Was able to visit her in South America about once a month.

fred_durst · Answer

no , i dont understand the logic of people who did ldr well except , there no single women left in his area

DiegoO · Answer

Ha.. That was me, only thay we never saw each other in person. An ocean apart it's tough.

McKellar · Answer

Unfortunately I don't make enough money for something like that.

Guardian45 · Answer

Yup, it was a DISASTER! We were separated by the Pacific Ocean. TOO BIG!!

Twalli · Answer

When my parents were dating, she went to study abroad in Sweden while he stayed in LA.

Zygum · Answer

I dated long distance girl, so I suffered too much. Please do not date long distance people

Mia-Wallace · Answer

Yeah. Sweden/Germany and Canada.

spartan55 · Answer

Yes, I did with my ex for 5 months until I moved.

Fireguy17 · Answer

not that far, a 6 hour drive was the furthest.

MoodyJazz · Answer

Yeah, my ex lived in the us and we met in Asia

WowwGirl · Answer

You already know sir.

ChiPaPa · Answer

Nope. I don't like LDR

IronsKev · Answer

No that wouldn't appeal to me at all

H3LLBRING3R · Answer

Yep, love is love homie.

boxxie2002 · Answer

Yes, nearly 2000km distance

Relux47 · Answer

I will never get on a plane to see anyone

In_Trance · Answer

That's not dating. Completely irrational

GoldenCage · Answer

no I have not

roy_ricky09 · Answer

Yes..

Fuentes · Answer

Nah never

Aphrodite1996 · Answer

It was temporary.

Slim57 · Answer

Nope

Have you ever dated someone so long distance that you had to fly to see them or vice versa?

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Have you ever dated someone so long distance that you had to fly to see them or vice versa?

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