I poured my heart out to a guy through text and he ignored me for 2 days. He is still actively online. If he asks me out again, would it best to miss?

[Anonymous]

We've been seeing each other for a month. After an amazing date sightseeing, he messaged md the day after. I responded with a long, heartfelt message. He ignored it and is always online. This is not the first time he's taken days to text. The reason why it hurts more now is because my message was long and heartfelt. If he asks me out again, would it be best to turn him down?

Him: I like you and your company. Had a good time per usual.

One of your questions made me think. You should know I'm not speaking with any other women. I don't play like that.

Now, here is a cow meme

Me: Shucks, I'm elated you feel that way. I enjoyed our roadtrip so much. It was a literal joyride and I felt connected. I feel comfortable and safe around you. I'm very happy to get to spend time with you.


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He didn't respond to my text, is always online for long periods, and has ignored for 2 days. This isn't the first time he's gone cold, but it is the first time he's done it after a heartfelt message. We've gone on 9 dates.

[WonderBell99]

Asker, I believe I answered your previous question. Keep in mind that one of your questions would maybe get deleted soon because you’ve asked the same twice.

“He didn't respond to my text, is always online for long periods, and has ignored for 2 days. This isn't the first time he's gone cold, but it is the first time he's done it after a heartfelt message. We've gone on 9 dates.“

It’s straight up better to ask him rather than to sit down and contemplate for long hours. It sounds like he’s playing one of those stupid mind games.. you know? The game where he ghosts you for a while because “absence makes the heart grow fonder” or whatever. Do you really need such a man in your life? Don’t you need someone you can rely on? Someone who wouldn’t go cold a lot? Or he may have some things going on in his life. I’d say it’s best not to make assumptions. There are two sides to every story. Heart out his. Straight up ask him.

[Asker]

Thanks for sharing. I feel there's a possibility he may be playing those games because its not the first time he's gone silent. It hurts because this cold shoulder was out of the blue, its the first time he hasn't made any plans. I really thought he liked me.

[WonderBell99]

Hear out his*

Sorry for the typo

[WonderBell99]

@Asker yes, I get what you mean, and I’ve been in a similar situation before. Turned out the guy was a huge prick who played games and manipulated me. But that was just me. Your guy seems very confusing. There are a few possibilities

1. he's confused how he feels about you
2. He doesn’t want to come off as “desperate” by being too interested
3. He is talking to other women
4. Maybe he’s lost interest in you
5. He’s playing mind games

[Asker]

That makes a lot of sense. I feel like there's a possibility he's unsure how he feels about me. What I don't get is why he'd say he likes me and doesn't talk to other women then just ignore me after. Would you go out with him again?

[WonderBell99]

I believe that if a guy cared about me, he wouldn’t behave like this. If he genuinely liked me, why would he go cold and not reply for 2 whole days? Surely, even a super busy person can make time for at least a minute to send a quick text. Honestly, I would be upfront about my feelings. I would first explain how I feel when he goes all cold and that it’s not going to work out anymore. I’d move on.

[WonderBell99]

You seem like a great girl, you can do better.

[Asker]

thanks so much for your kind thoughts.

[WonderBell99]

Just a thought, but did you feel like your relationship was moving too fast?

Because maybe he felt like it and wanted to take it slow? It’s hard to say because he’s acting all hot and cold. I highly suggest you talk to him about this. Communication is the key to all relationships,

[Asker]

Yes he most likely thought it was moving too fast. He mentioned to me once that he likes to take things slow in dating. He said girls in the past had issues with that. You are exactly right. My text came across a bit mushy.

[WonderBell99]

No problem, but please talk to him about him ignoring you for 2 whole days. That’s not really right, you know?

[mark000h]

I think you have to ask yourself if you think he cares as much for this relationship as you do. Answer is obviously no, it's not the same. I'm sorry you got hurt, but it's better you learn now that he's not with you at the same level of commitment. It sounds like you're a caring person who can do better.

[Asker]

Thank you so much. Would you suggest I don't go out with him if he asks me out again?

[Asker]

Why would he say he likes me and my company if he planned to ignore me eventually?

[mark000h]

Well, you have to decide but if I were in your shoes, I wouldn't give more of yourself to someone who doesn't care as much as you do. You seem like you have a lot to give to someone who'll appreciate it and who'll feel the same as you. 😋

[Asker]

thanks so much. he actually mentioned last time we were in person that he wanted to go to a food truck date with me. if he follows up on it, should i go?

[mark000h]

You're welcome 😊
Give him another chance to show you how he feels but if he doesn't, then it's up to you. You have a lot of love to give someone, give it to someone who deserves it. Take care.

[Asker]

Thank you for your input. In your opinion, why do you think he lost interest?

[whosnumber1]

I don't think yours is that bad actually... it a bit over the top but not that bad.

I would go silent for a few days, give it some time. then message him and see if he wants to go out again. if no, move on. wasn't meant to be.

[Asker]

Thanks for sharing. Why do you think he suddenly gone silent?

[whosnumber1]

I think because you came on too strong... thats why I would cool it for a few days and then just ask to go out again.

[Asker]

Yes I realized I came on too strong. Would I come across overly available if I said yes to going out with him again?

[whosnumber1]

no, but of you do get to see him in person you could casually bring it up and laugh out off. that you didn't mean to come across like a needy puppy

[Asker]

Ok. If a girl you were into sent this text to you, would it scare you off?

[whosnumber1]

no it wouldn't. if I was into her and she sent me that is be like right on!

[Asker]

I see. He is most likely not into me then. He had been texting me like crazy before all this. Do you think our recent date made him lose interest?

[whosnumber1]

though to say, did you get another date?

[Asker]

No other date. I asked him on our last date if he's dated before. Do you think that pushed him away? It was our 8th date

[whosnumber1]

you've been on 8 dates. anything physical?

[whosnumber1]

you should DM me

[Asker]

We've only kissed and held hands. Also, he just texted me an hour ago. It was about a random Christmas ornament. He basically ignored the message I sent. I'm unsure if I should still give him my attention

[whosnumber1]

I dunno, he kinda sounds like a dud. if you cold shoulder him he might pursue you more. I think you should gently move on...

[Danny_dan92]

You shot your shot, and failed. We all get rejected.


Take the L and move on with your life, no point crying over spilled milk

[Asker]

Well, he just texted me an hour ago. His message was a completely different topic, he sent a pic of his family ornaments. I am unsure if I should proceed to give him my attention.

[Danny_dan92]

He’s not interested

[Asker]

If he asks me out again, what would it mean?

[Danny_dan92]

Probably only wants to get in your pants

[Asker]

What if he knows I'm religious and not into immediate sex? He asked me out again

[Danny_dan92]

Some guys don’t give a fuck about that

[Asker]

What part made you think he only wants sex?

[Danny_dan92]

The fact that he hits you up every once in awhile. And doesn’t try to talk to you daily.

[Asker]

Oh. When you like a girl, you text her everyday?

[Danny_dan92]

Definitely

[Asker]

He always says its so easy to talk to me. Do yoi think he likes my personality but not my looks? My looks would not be enough for girlfriend material?

[Danny_dan92]

Yeah, maybe he likes the conversations but that doesn’t mean anything in terms of a relationship

[Asker]

I see. What do you guys look for beside conversation?

[noohair]

So you have discovered that what is called "social media" is anti-social. It allows people to do things that would be unacceptable in face to face conversation.

[chapman876]

Keep up trying okay , you're going to win his heart

[Asker]

I would, but he's completely ignored me

[chapman876]

Okay but however keep yourselves together okay. knowing that one day you will find someone who will love you care and cherish you. do not kill yourself okay

[Asker]

Thank you for your input. In your opinion, why do you think he lost interest?

[Anonymous]

I would want better than someone who is not showing any interest.

[Luv2screw]

He might have friends that are. Women

[Asker]

You mean he's into his women friends?

[Luv2screw]

He could be maybe

[Asker]

I see. Would you go out with him again?

[Luv2screw]

Here I’ll explain I have a guy friend who I’ve known for 7 years I’m the girl he friendzonrr.
I see same thing with youu and your guy

[Asker]

I see. Why would he ask me out on a lot of dates if he is planning to friendzone?