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"Look I’ll admit having a tall guy is attractive but short guys are cute too."
I think this sentence really encapsulates the issue. Whether or not you want to accept it, word choice matters. By your own admission, the tall guy is "attractive" and the short guy is "cute"; you don't explain what that means or what size ranges qualify, but suffice it to say, being tall is an asset to a guy and being short is a detriment. "Cute" is not how you describe a man, that's how you describe a small, vulnerable child.
"Yet so many guys think it’s detrimental and dooms them for life." I'm on the shorter side myself, for a guy, at about 5'7"-5'8", and while I can attest to the fact that guys my size can get women, it's very obvious (merely from paying attention) that being this size or shorter is not as attractive as being 4+ inches taller to some women. Does being "short" doom men to a life of loneliness and misery? No. However, it is more of a liability than a benefit. Which is to say, taller guys are perceived to exhibit dominance simply because they take up more space; their presence commands attention, by virtue of size alone. Shorter guys have to compensate for this, in some way: if they aren't as big physically, then they have to close the gap by having a big "personality", i. e. being a blowhard, making a scene, etc. If you aren't so noticeable by sight alone, then you have to find external means to make yourself known.
For guys on the shorter side, a good way to make up for this deficiency--in a way that doesn't come across as being jealous or insecure of men bigger than them--is by being loud, but in a way that is witty and entertaining, but appears relatively effortless. Commanding attention by knowing how to "work the crowd", as it were. Such prowess is what many women are attracted to and would consider "character and personality", and it is also something more and more men are lacking. Intellect, like having a high IQ, might be a marker of exceptional academic proficiency, but does not directly translate to interpersonal calibration--something which is both valuable because everyone uses the Internet and in short supply because face-to-face interactions are (for one reason or another) decreasingly common.
However, questions like "why do men feel insecure about their height?" get raised, because the average woman doesn't have to think about it; sexual dimorphism has resulted in female bodies naturally being shorter than male ones, and their role as selector means that this is usually advantageous for them. Without realizing it, they often conflate mens' physical size with masculine competence and then they wonder why men who don't measure up complain about being too short.
I think there's some similarities between this, being rich, and dick size. Not that I mean these things are correlated. But that guys tend to jump straight to these things as attractive.
Personally, I never felt these pressure all that much. I was almost 6' in 8th grade and it was awkward af. I used to wish I had the body type of the short stocky guys.
I'm not sure about the rich side of things. I make six figures and feel pretty poor right now after a house flood. But it's not like it's gained me much in attention anyway. And dick size I always found to be a bit of a funny one. I KNEW that was stuff guys say to other guys.
And that last sentence is the point I wanted to make here. A lot of this is things guys tell to other guys. They carry so much weight because this is damn near the only feedback we get. We don't get daily compliments on how we are dressed or how we look. Girls don't generally approach us, so we don't know what's working and what isn't. The only thing we have to go on is what other guys say, and to an extent our own ego. That's why you'll see the most out-of-tune guys with big egos. There's just no feedback. We don't know where we stand.
I only started tapping into "chemistry" and how it works. I used to be all facts and figures, but started getting more interested in people. As interested in character development as I am in plot. That only came from coming out of my shell socially. Without that, the only thing I could picture girls wanting was facts and figures.
i don't mind short guys. i have seen a lot of shorties with handsome faces and sexy as hell. one had piercing green eyes and dark brown hair, and was dressed in a cool leather jacket and ripped light blue jeans. so hot. y'all just need to know how to dress, and most men nowadays lack in that department. i am so tired of seeing men in track pants and sweaters. ever heard of well fitted jeans that aren't 5 sizes too big, jean jackets, leather, trench coats? okay, i am pretty short myself so most guys are taller than me, even the "short" ones at 5'5. i am about 5'1 or so. what matters most to me is a guy's face and his personality. i don't like scrawny or really skinny guys. i even prefer chubby guys over really skinny guys. so gentlemen, stop freaking out about your height so much. and if you are too skinny, just eat a couple burgers, problem solved. your face, fashion sense and personality are much more important.
Yes, I've noticed some guys make it a big issue. I would date a short guy also like you. I don't care much about height as long as the guy is the same height or taller than me. I think the vocal minority of women who say they only date guys that are 6ft and above (even on dating sites) contributes to this problem. Some women see it as a status symbol to have a tall guy by their side especially if they're very short. Not all women are like this. Most women just like the man to be taller than themselves.
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u "I would never not date a guy purely because he was short." I am 5'9" so I am quite average and I don't have this problem. However, I know that there are many girls who do avoid shorter guys, and girls who are taller avoid even guys who are average height. I have met a few tall girls who refused to have even a first date with me because they wanted a taller guy. When you ask "why do guys feel height is such an issue?" it sounds as if you think this is just an issue for guys but it affects women as well.
"It’s nothing compared to character and personality." But many guys never have a chance to demonstrate their character and personality because they never even get a first date.
Because height shows a level of strength on the physical side. Tall for a lot of women means that they have a strong protector. A man, in a sense. They can also wear heels around them, too.
It has been a staple for a lot of women. Taller men are taken more seriously, seen as protectors, seen as leaders, as grown men, balances out or increases the chance of tall offspring, which is why you see a lot of women looking for men 6ft or taller.
Men shorter than 6ft or around the same height as a woman can find success, but it may be difficult for a few reasons. They are seen as more "cute" which is typically the kiss of death for short guys signaling you are only a friend or brother to a woman. You aren't taken as seriously because your presence isn't as noticed as someone tall or confident, pretty much viewed as a kid or young man. Shorter is considered fragile.
That is why it is important as a short man to have other qualities that make you stand out. Confidence being the big one, being a leader or showing those capabilities, being in shape, knowing how to do masculine tasks and kicking ass at it.
I know a few really good men who , because they are short (and around here short is any guy under 6') never get dates. My friend Ken (not his real name) for example. For DECADES I run into him when I go out. He's a really good person, but I've seen him approach and fail so many times I don't know how he always has a smile on his face. Even after some unreasonably harsh and over the top rejections he is upbeat and positive. I used to be like him before my divorce, cheerfull and optomistic.
He usually just walks up to them, offers to buy them a drink and invites them over to our table, hardly obnoxious and most women just smile (some laugh) and say "iv'e got a boyfriend" which is probably true, it's a big sausage fest here almost no women are single as men outnumber them in this city.
At 6'2" I'm average around here, when I moved away suddenly women are interested (but I'd already given up so to late for me)
The fact, and it's a fact, is that the majority of women don't like short or even average men. In a place where the numbers mean there are 3 guys per women, short or average looking guys aren't even allowed to participate.
Women have no clue as to how difficult dating is for men, they cut us no slack and some women are brutal in their rejections, it takes a thick skin or huge ego to date these days.
I honestly don’t know, but I’ve only ever witnessed men making it such a problem online and it’s usually really negative not so pleasant people. I really feel for short guys who get rejected because of it (like actually short - like 5’0-5’4) but men seem to think that all women hate anyone under 6’0 and would never even look at them which is completely untrue, and guys as short as I mentioned before still easily get into relationships. I knew a guy who was about 5’1 and was with a girl who was about 5’10 or taller! Height really isn’t the main factor in a relationship
Why do women act like thes things don't exist in this world? Especially when women are involved, it seems they are blinded to the reality of things.
90% of women want a tall guy. Is it the only thing they want? No, there are other factors that will help them "overlook" him being shorter. Such as looks, or money, or status. But they want tall.
Maybe YOU don't care, but that doesn't mean that everyone else doesn't. Most women have it in their bios on dating apps. Also, usually the first 2 messages you get from women on those apps... 1) What do you do? 2) How tall are you.
Do you think short guys are just making it up? I'm 6'1 so I don't have an issue with my height. But you would be amazed how many women have an open distaste for short men, especially around a taller man. They will tell me how other men were too short, etc... I think, they think they are stroking my ego, but really it just makes them look shallow.
Well its like women who think they are not treated the same compared to their male counter parts.
Well in general shorter men are stereotypically consider to be weaker than taller men. Taller men are traditionally more successful than shorter. So as a short guy at (5'8) I have to admit that I have to be that much more knowledgeable and charismatic than taller men. And yeah even at 5'8 I over look guys who are 5'5 as being incapable of portraying authority.
This why most CEOs are over 6 foot tall.
https://m.economictimes.com/the-necktie-syndrome-why-ceos-tend-to-be-significantly-taller-than-the-average-male/articleshow/10178115.cms
Every man wants to be that that man that every woman desires. That's why we get jealous of celebrities or other people that seem like they got it all and they see the women drooling over him. Every man wants to be tall, rich, fit, and got a big di-... ok, I went a bit too far l, but you catch my drift. Men that have issues with their height are just insecure. We all get like this at some point. All I got to say to every short man out there to embrace your size. No everyone is gonna be Shaq sized. This is all genetics. Want to change that? Tie your legs and arms to horses going opposite directions and let it rip... just kidding again.
I'm 6'1. Girl I was talking to years back was like 5'8- 5'9. Just a few weeks ago I saw her at a bar talking to a guy that was right next to her who was 5'10
She had a few drinks with them that you paid for, laugh with them. Then walked away from him to come over to me and said she wasn't interested because he was too short for her, she is a tall girl. Her words
At 5'8-5'9, a 5'10 guy was too short. I'm not saying hi is everything or matters all that much. But it is a factor. Guys acknowledging that is just reality.
Girls don't have to deal with the issue. Guys do. So a lot of girls down play how much it actually matters, while a lot of guys play up how much it matters because it's not insurmountable. But to say it's not a factor is just a lie
For a lot of girls they have an upfront cut off height requirement for all guys and unless the guy is attractive in other ways he's screwed from the start
Because women make height an issue.
Look through some female dating profiles and you will see that most women have insane height demands that disqualify 90 per cent plus of men.
Between height and income requirements, most women make it impossible for themselves to be matched with anyone.
To learn more, go to YouTube and watch what dating coach and matchmaker Rebecca Lynn Pope said a couple of years ago. She became so frustrated by the unrealistic demands of women that she stopped serving female clients.
Is this some sort of weird reverse psychology question that I'm misunderstanding?
I've rarely heard of a guy saying they wouldn't date a tall woman, on the flip side, like it's cast into the fiber of their being, so many women say they'd be put off by dating a guy that was shorter than she.
Oh I get it, as a female question asker, you're trying to maintain the veil that women aren't as much if not more shallow than men? Well scientific studies have already shined it's bright lights on that misconception.
You can't put the genie back in the bottle. Nein Nein Nein.
Guys feel it's an issue because women make it an issue. I don't know how many times I've seen women say things in their dating profiles like "must be 6 feet tall or over" or even worse "I'm 5'4" and 5'8" in heels, so you need to be taller than me in my heels, at least 5"10". That's the most superficial shit I've ever heard in my life.
I have a few friends who are about 6'4"-6'6". When I used to go out drinking with them before they got married, I looked like a coach of a basketball team haha. It was like I was invisible to the girls. They would just stare at or come up and talk to my friends, rarely even give me a second glance.
Because some women do care about height. Not everyone has the positive attitude like you do. I've seen women call a guy who's let's say 5'9" and calls him a small boi where she's 5'1 or something. It's like anyone under 6 feet is automatically categorized as short by some women. I guess the same goes for men and their preference of height in women.
Because it clearly is. Women tend to want a man that is at least slightly taller then themselves; there are perfectly natural and healthy evolutionary reasons for that.
The harm comes from the often dysgenic people that push for the ”normalization” and embracing of dysgenic qualities (i. e. to reject the intuition nature gives us that serves to protect ourselves and maximize the odds of creating optimally healthy children).
That said: Not all tall men are created equal; height is only one signifier amongst other more important signifiers in a potentially viable mate.
I think this whole concept is ridiculous 🙄. I have never thought height was an issue. Tall guys are not in the majority. Some women may find tall guys to be more attractive, but as you pointed out It's definitely not necessarily a deal breaker.
It may not seem like it, but there are advantages to being another height 🤔, speed, agility and not having to concern yourself with some of the things tall people do (this goes both ways of course).
Can't say I've ever seen it as an issue, I've found people attractive who were much shorter than me, as well as a couple who were taller (I'm 6'3" so it's unusual for a woman to be taller, but I've seen a few). I have my height on dating profiles as it seems to be important to a few women, especially online.
I'm not really bothered as long as there is mutual attraction and I hold out hope I'll find it someday.
Is this some kind of joke? I've seen countless examples of women saying "I would never date a guy below 6'0 tall." Not that I have to worry about that because I am just shy of 6'1. But I find it kind of rude and hypocritical that women will reject a guy over something he has no control over (height) then get mad when they get rejected over something they can control (weight). This isn't every woman, but quite a number of them do this and they are so clueless to their own double standards.
i don't understand those women. 6 feet is a freaking tower for me as i am about 5'1. i'd feel i'd need a ladder just to kiss or hug him. i can understand taller women over like 5'7 expecting 6'0 feet tall or taller, but i don't understand women who are like under 5'6 having those standards. like woman, a man who is 5'7 or 5'8 should be okay. i am happy if a guy is a bit taller than me, i am not too picky when it comes to height. besides, i think a man's face and personality are much more important. i wouldn't like a guy if his face didn't appeal to me because i would be trying to imagine what our future kids would look like.
When women are young and at their sexual peak (fitness wise) they have more choices than the average man can even imagine. She can exclude potential mates on flimsy parameters; zodiac signs, being below 6ft, etc. So men have felt this selection process and adapted accordingly, focusing on either getting resources, or totally exiting the sexual marketplace.
Because many men are rejected outright for their height. Personality means nothing when the person won't even talk to them in the first place to get to know them due to their height.
I didn't know it was such a common problem until I joined this site and saw so many people complaining about it, but after I looked into it more, it is actually very common.
I guess since I am big and most of the guys I grew up around were also big, I never really encountered it.
My grandpa was 6’5” when he was young and before he died he was hunched over and shorter than me (5’11”) I used to always think of the Riddle of the Sphinx when I saw him. Good man, threw my dad through a glass door before and seen him snatch the glasses off a mans face only to return to the car and put them on the dash.. if you not tall, you got to be tough (or smart and get out the way) that’s for sure!
Because you constantly hear not just from other girls but even your own family that short guys are unattractive. Do you seriously believe the you around my age would date someone whose shorter than you are? Most women don't do that because they have options during their college days and as they get older they may start thinking that short guys are attractive to. I don't believe that a girl 18 to her mid 20s would date a short guy.
I mean most guys I dated around 18-22 were as tall or under than me (165-172cm) so it wasn’t really a big deal for me.
I don’t think it’s guys. It’s because they know women hate short guys. It’s like a zero% chance a guy gets with a talker girl unless he has some other extraordinary features that make him attractive (Wealth, beauty, etc.). Some women will say they don’t care but when it actually happens, “do I look weird wearing heels in public with my short boyfriend?”.
Probably from experience. There is a slight bias towards taller guys amongst women. For example, the average height of a guy is approximately 5'10". However, the height that women find most attractive is 6'. The odds that a guy who is 5'7", or 1 SD below average, is rejected based on height alone is 60% while the odds a guy who is 6'1" (1 SD above average) is rejected is 40%.
Coz the girls feel the same way, you may not care about it much may be you're an exception but majority of girls do care about it. Most girls want to date tall men ( tall means 6 ft or above).
I know not every girl care about it but a large number of them do reject guys who are short.
It's same as most men want thin women but some men are ok with chubby women as well.
Similarly most women want tall and handsome man with good genes. But some are ok with short and average looking guys.
True sentiments but I think it’s an old issue. Like the saying “tall, dark, and handsome.” There are plenty of d adages that women say about men that still circulate. It’s just a new generation having to realize it. I’m with you though on personality over physicality. Sure looks are important but I think being able to be interested in/enjoy the person is more important.
There are women who don’t care about height but more women that do. It doesn’t at all seem uncommon for them to say they don’t want a guy shorter than them.
That is fine and totally up to them if they have physical preferences, but it is going to cause short guys to be self conscious about it.
I think because girls usually say they prefer a guy to be as tall or taller than them in heels. In reality most girls will look past it, despite what they say, so long as they guy has other good qualities.
Why do girls feel their face is such an issue? Look, I'll admit girls without glasses are attractive, but those girls wearing glasses are okay. Now how do you feel about such issues? If you find tall guys hot, let short guys find themselves unattractive. You do you.
That's thoughtful of you, many girls are not so accepting or rather weather they admit it or not they only give tall guys attention. I'm 6 foot tall but girls barely notice tbh. 6'2" 6'4" guys get tons of looks!
Height isn't an issue for men. The issue for men is that height is an issue for women. I've literally witnessed women belittle and reject men for not being tall enough, and justify their "preference" (requirement) even though the women themselves were undesirable. As in, they were obsessed with particular tall men but the men didn't want anything to do with them.
That's all well and good for you, but, while many women are OK with shorter men, most want taller men and have hard rules about minimum height for an acceptable man.
They RARELY have a maximum height for an acceptable man.
Because no one wants to be seen as less attractive than others in the eyes of their partner. Imagine if a guy says to you "I find 90% girls more attractive than you, but you're still cute" :D Really, you can't see what would be the issue with that?
Guess they have been rejected for their height or spend too much time on internet reading stuff. Most girls don't care for it except the bimbo like girls. In my country guys are pretty shorts but they have girlfriend.
Because to all too many of you women, IT IS AN ISSUE. The only saving grace I had, as an unattractive dork, is that I was and still am a TALL unattractive dork.
Pretty much most people and the media tells them it's the way to be. Same as at one point the media practically told us we had to look like a Kardashian
It's true, look at the Bachelor reality show. The guys keep getting bigger and bigger.
The recent one "Clayton" is like a giant.
It feeds into our perceptions of what's attractive.
I think it’s funny how we’re all blaming only women for this insecurity but my 2 brothers ( one who is 5’6 and the other is 5’7.5) has only ever been bullied about his height from other men so… making fun of them for being short and small all the time. height isn’t an issue, some people just have a preference but y’all who make people feel bad about it are sad.
Men "feel" it is an issue because it is, and the reasons is because women make it one.
"One study published in the Journal of Family Issues found that most women just aren't willing to settle for shorter guys."
https://www.sharecare.com/relationships/study-find-women-prefer-taller-men
there is a saying :
a woman cares about a man's height. a man cares about a woman's weight.
True. Sadly one issue can be controlled. The other can’t.
@globetrotter22 sadly, weight cannot be as easily controlled as some men like to think. genetics has a role to play, where some people can eat like pigs and still be walking bean poles, while others will gain 30 lbs if they eat a muffin one day. and women's bodies and hormones make it harder to lose weight, as PMS can sometimes lead to depressive thoughts and insatiable hunger/cravings. like the kind of hunger where your stomach growls and you feel like you're gonna pass out if you don't eat another sandwich.
@DianaWest I do understand that females have a tougher time with this because of hormones. They also naturally have a higher fat percentages due to their bodies preparing for children.
With that said I need to draw the line somewhere. There IS a point where obese people make unhealthy decisions and it IS something that requires self discipline and effort.
I was a chubby video game nerd in grade school by the way. I also had undiagnosed ADHD. I couldn’t even do a pull up and I was the second slowest kid in the mile run. Most of the girls could out run me in the 5th grade. I was bullied viciously for it.
Did I just feel sorry for myself as I got older? No I didn’t like being weak and fat. I got into wrestling and track. I really sucked at first but I stuck with it. In HS I got very cut, defined and thin (being too skinny is actually a different problem for guys). Point is I’m glad there wasn’t some anti fat shaming program bullshit that said “it’s okay to be lazy and chubby” when I was a kid. It’s not.
Anyway I can tell when a heavier girl exercises regularly. She holds herself differently. I can see more confidence in her body language and posture. But I can also tell when a woman has a “woe is me. Every body is beautiful and I do need to change for anybody”. One person I have more respect for than the other.
@shaysh87 after our last discussion I prefer to not have any conversation with you. That’s not to say I don’t mean what I said in my final response. Seriously I wish the best for you.
However what you said earlier rubbed me so far the wrong way I don’t think I can ever take you any of your other insights/advice on any girl/guy interaction seriously again.
So why do your thing and I’ll do mine? I don’t like blocking people but lets just stay our own lanes, okay? Best of luck.
@globetrotter22 i wasn't referring to morbidly obese people, but to people who may be 10-15 lbs heavier. the last few lbs are really hard to lose, and depending on a person's genetics, metabolism, and body shape, they may always have a little extra regardless of how much they exercise or diet. it doesn't mean they are stuffing their face with muffins every hour of the day. as a man, it isn't that hard to lose weight. as a man, you can eat about 700 calories more than a woman. for a shorter woman, it is really damn hard because so much food is fattening and before you know it, you've eaten 1300 calories after eating a sandwich and an apple. for a shorter woman, you have to eat about 1400 calories a day or else you gain weight. it can be really damn hard to eat food that satiates you. so you basically need to turn into a nutritionist and build your own greenhouse or starve (a little) every day to maintain a barbie physique. also, as a guy, you can eat 6 burgers a day and throw around a few weights, drink a few protein shakes, and then you can get bulky, especially if you already have the broad shoulders and everything. also, men should try popping out 3-4 kids and then think about criticizing women who are 10 lbs heavier than they should be. i don't know if your hormones or birth control ever made you depressed or experience insatiable hunger. i guess men are really lucky they don't have to deal with the bullshit women have to. at the end of the day, we are still expected to be flawless and barbie dolls. bullcrap. a person who is slightly overweight can be healthier than the "normal weight" person who survives by eating only carrots and lettuce.
@DianaWest I get what you are saying. I know that’s tough. But you got crap going on in our society like Vanity Affair putting a plus size model on their front cover. She wasn’t just a little chubby but flat out morbidly obese. That’s not only unsightly but extremely unhealthy.
Also some women think that male dating preferences can be “socialized”. Like if there was enough fat acceptance movements out there then fit/thin men would start dating more obese women.
Ah no. Hell no. You don’t see short guys getting together and actively trying to shame women for not liking their height.
@globetrotter22
There are actually plenty of men who hate skinny girls but they get absolutely no representation in society. I’m a thick girl and I never had a hard time getting a guy. I’ve had at least 7 guys Over the past few years who told me that they liked thick girls and hated skinny.
Fat comes in all forms. Not all overweight girls look like obese whales. There are some guys who are even attracted to obese girls
@globetrotter22
The reason for the plus sized models on magazine covers is to banish the rule that only skinny girls are attractive
What is so wrong about this?
Should only skinny women get representation?
Just cus you’re not attracted to thick , it doesn’t mean nobody else are attracted to them
Most people don’t find plus sized models attractive for a reason. But given the PC culture we live in people are being forced to accept this. But they are only saying nice things on the surface.
The plus sized model I am talking about the vanity fair cover was no “curvy sexy” model. She was over the top obese in every way shape and form. Most men don’t want to date nor should they feel guilty for not wanting that (unless they are obese themselves).
@shaysh87 I am guessing you are not exactly a twig yourself. If that is the truth then that explains some of your aggressive behavior earlier.
But I have found that big girls usually take their challenges and go in one of two directions: they are really cool or are very nasty. The former I’ll always be nice to. I’ll never in a million years say anything about their weight. But the latter are being loud, rude and aggressive because they want any attention. Even negative attention. That’s got to be a very depressing way to go through life.
@globetrotter22
I have never seen an obese model on cover of a magazine. Typically those plus sized
models are still very presentable looking
And secondly , it’s about time guys who prefer thick girls , start getting something they actually like to see on magazine covers too
And it’s time for society to stop shaming thick girls into believing nobody is ever attracted to them. The bullying that girls used to face in the 1990s-2000s was horrific. Many girls were starving themselves back then. Tons of women have body image issues
Not everything is about you. We live in a society where everyone has right to their own preferences Ans of course setting a strict body image ideal for women is also immoral
@globetrotter22
Doesn’t matter if you aren’t outwardly bullying people for being fat. The fact that you’re saying that plus sized women be publicly seen on magazines shows how close minded and immature you are. As if everything you see in public HAS to aesthetically pleasing ONLY TO YOU. Everything must make you happy. Anything that is not beautiful to you , must be hidden. According to you, every woman on earth should look one way. Women are born to exist in different shapes , sizes , forms. Every woman has a different body type. There is no obligation everything in society should need to be designed to suit only you.
Plus sized womne should be able to wear anything they want. Doesn’t matter if you enjoy seeing it or not. Being able to wear anything you want is a human right,
@globetrotter22
I think you’re trying to manipulate all men to only want to be attracted to skinny women. That’s the only reason why you would think it’s right to never show plus size models anywhere. You think everyone likes size 0 models? NO.
Plenty of men like thick girls. I was shocked at how many of them actually don’t like skinny. The reason why so many guys never want to say they like thick girls is because of assholes like you who call them “chubby chasers” or have this habit of shaming overweight people.
Yes some men like thick girls. Fat fetishes do exist and to each his own. I could care less about one guys preference to another.
But what’s going with the “fat acceptance” movement is its mostly frustrated heavy girls who don’t get the same kind of attention that their fit/skinny counterparts do. However this is just a dating problem but a HEALTH problem. Being morbidly obese can be more dangerous than being a smoker. The number one contributing factor to covid fatalities (besides age) is obesity. Funny how that inconvenient fact got downplayed in the mas media. Obese people also suck of lots of healthcare costs despite not having to pay higher health insurance premiums.
Anyway back to dating preferences. Women will discriminate against men for all or anything when it comes selecting partners. Men are told to just accept it and we do. You don’t see us creating “movements” to try to change female dating preferences.
@globetrotter22
Fat acceptance movement is created because historically overweight girls are heavily judged , bullied and shamed. Fat acceptance is created to give representation that there definitely ARE men who do find them attractive and also that any sort of shaming or bullying is not ok.
I’m a thick girl. I’ve had at least 7 years over the past few years that I’ve dated that said they hated skinny girls.
Anyway @shaysh87 i think it will be a historical day if you and I ever agree on anything.
However I am going to admit I made a mistake earlier. When I said “we shouldn’t communicate” in the first comment earlier didn’t realize I was commenting on your thread. I mistakenly thought you commented on mine. So I admit that was an “unintelligent” mistake. You will probably take that and run with it. Use to to disparage everything else I said. But I am owning up to that simple mistake. However I stand by everything else I said.
@shaysh87 I have not once anywhere at any point called you name or insulted your personal position.
But your hateful remarks tell me that deep down you know the truth that I’m right and just can’t accept it. Instead you scream and throw insults thinking that’s going to change people’s hearts and minds. Quite the contrary it just emboldens me when people do that. They can’t accept the truth and are frustrated that not more people can agree with their fantasy land.
Only an “immature loser” would result to insults and rants in arguments. You are just projecting how you truly feel about yourself when you do that. Truth is I feel sorry for you. Really.
@globetrotter22
You lost my respect when you ridiculed plus sized models being on cover of magazines. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Not everything is done to only suit you. You’re not the center of the universe. It’s not only you that matters in society
This along with your attempts at demonizing women from the prior thread we interacted upon
The things you say show a lot about you
“you lost my respect” funny you say that after yesterday you told añother girl on a different post that you “hope her husband beats her” if she married a conservative man. If that’s not sick and disgusting than I don’t know what is. Not only will other men lose respect for you reading that crap but other women will too. It shows how twisted your mental functioning is.
I have been the adult in the room the entire time in almost every conversation we’ve had. I stuck to the facts and rationale. For example being obese is very UNhealthy. It will shorten your life. No amount of protesting, complaining and trolling will ever change that simple fact. So yes i am against having (very) plus sized models on magazine covers. It’s telling obese people that it’s okay to be complacent. That’s not helping them.
@globetrotter22
she wanted her husband to beat her. she hates husbands who treat her fairly. I believe she has mentioned that very clearly on her post.
[I have been the adult in the room the entire time in almost every conversation we’ve had. I stuck to the facts and rationale. For example being obese is very UNhealthy. It will shorten your life. No amount of protesting, complaining and trolling will ever change that simple fact. So yes i am against having (very) plus sized models on magazine covers. It’s telling obese people that it’s okay to be complacent. That’s not helping them.]
you just bullied overweight women by saying they should have no right to be seen in public images of society? how is this mature, respectful and civil?
you never mentioned anything about health. you just kept talking about how you're not attracted to overweight women and how they should never appear publicly. This is why you lost my respect.
why should I still call you positive names if you're immature and disrespectful enough to say something like this?
you're just an immature disrespectful child pretending to be an adult.
@shaysh87 there is no excuse for what you said that girl none. Nothing justifies that. You don’t get a pass to say that to people just because you are a woman.
As for being “nice”. You think being nice is me agreeing with your viewpoints and if I disagree with you that means I “hate you”. Need I remind you again that i have never once called you a name and your insulted your personal life. It’s tempting but one of us has more cogent thought and maturity not do that.
I will say it once and I will say it again: there is a difference between BEING right vs. WHAT is right. And telling obese people (not just overweight people) that it’s okay to treat their bodies as such is worst the thing you can do. That doesn’t mean it’s okay to bully them. But also doesn’t mean its okay to lie to them either.
@globetrotter22
[there is no excuse for what you said that girl none. Nothing justifies that. You don’t get a pass to say that to people just because you are a woman.]
didn't she clearly SAY that she didn't' like men who treated her equally? she DOES WANT to be beat.
its her fault if she's shitting on men who want to treat her fairly. why are you accusing me of saying something wrong? i've said nothing wrong. It all CAME OUT OF HER MOUTH.
[As for being “nice”. You think being nice is me agreeing with your viewpoints and if I disagree with you that means I “hate you”. Need I remind you again that i have never once called you a name and your insulted your personal life. It’s tempting but one of us has more cogent thought and maturity not do that. I will say it once and I will say it again: there is a difference between BEING right vs. WHAT is right. And telling obese people (not just overweight people) that it’s okay to treat their bodies as such is worst the thing you can do. That doesn’t mean it’s okay to bully them. But also doesn’t mean its okay to lie to them either.]
what is morally correct about telling overweight people that they shouldn't appear on magazine covers? have you ever given the consideration that there are plenty of men out there who like thick women? NO YOU DON'T GIVE A SHIT. YOU JUST CARE ONLY ABOUT WHAT YOU LIKE TO SEE.
Have you ever thought that overweight people have the human right to appear anywhere they want or wear whatever they want? NO. YOU THINK THAT OVERWEIGHT PEOPLE SHOULDN'T HAVE THE RIGHT TO DO CERTAIN THINGS SIMPLY BECASUE THEY ARE OVERWEIGHT.
@globetrotter22
Have you shown any consideration towards the millions of girls starving themselves to death because they have a huge phobia of being fat? have you ever heard of bullimia or anorexia? back in the 2000s, GIRLS DID NOT EAT because they had body image issues due to the rigid standard of beauty on magazines and commercials.
have you ever shown any consideration towards these issues? NO
How are you morally correct? how are you a decent person who deserve respect?
you don't give a shit about anyone else, but only yourself and what you like to see. Quit bullshitting about what is healthy or not. We all know other people's health was never your priority. you're just trying to save yourself right now by spewing out a few lies.
@globetrotter22
overweight people are entitled to live their lives however they want. if they want to wear bathing suits to go swimming, they have the right to enjoy swimming. if they want to wear skirts, they can wear skirts. if they want to be on the cover of a magazine, they should have the human right to be on a magazine cover. if there are men who like thick women, thick women should be on magazine covers.
you have no right to control how other people live their lives. you have no right to control what other men's preferences are.
we live in a society where everyone deserve equal rights. we don't give more rights to skinny people. we give consideration to each other's preferences to physical attraction.
I'm not someone like you, who only cares about themselves and what they like to see. this itself shows you have no respect for anyone
@globetrotter22 Dude seriously stop being a dick and just ignore her if she upsets you. Nothing comes out of slinging insults at each other.
@StormMistress
quit defending a fat shamer
I’m not I’m a body positive person I just think this back and forth will go nowhere (both of you won’t agree or anything after all) and is basically a waste of time.
@StormMistress
if you let bullies go just like that, they will bully again later on. The better thing to do would be to teach them a lesson
I know but do you really think he will change his opinion if challenged? Most people double down instead when they’re views are challenged. That’s just humans for you. I just think he’s not worth the time since you won’t convince him to change his view points.
@StormMistress
he's never gonna admit he was a dumbass (even if he knows he's a dumbass). but you gotta let him understand why he's a piece of shit. he may understand why he's a Piece of shit. but i dont expect him to admit it. I will get the message through trust me.
@StormMistress
you don't just write whatever you want online and expect no backlash.
if you're tired of all the notifications, you can click on the gray check mark next to each notification to mark it as read.
@StormMistress I know it sucks getting all these notifications. Sorry for that. But if you read through everything I wrote I did not once name call or label the ever so graceful and discerning @shaysh87 anything. Ever. She meanwhile has called me every name in the book because l committed the unforgivable sin of disagreeing with your viewpoints.
You might not agree with me either and that’s fine. But just look how she debates. She can’t win factual arguments so he has to resort to hurling labels and insults. She said even worse to a woman she politically disagreed with yesterday.
Excuse me *disagreeing with her viewpoints.
@globetrotter22
you just plainly disrespected the human right of overweight people. and now you're still insisting that what you said was correct. you have absolutely no consideration for others in society.
how are you correct in any way shape or form?
Respect is earned. In this case, you have not earned my respect. So no, I don't have to speak to you nicely (when you're openly being disrespectful towards overweight people)
nobody cares if you're not attracted to overweight people.
but to try to give skinny people more rights than over weight people, is plainly wrong.
you have NO RIGHT to say that thicker people shouldn't appear in magazines or that they should be hidden in society or that they shouldn't be able to wear bathing suits to go swimming.
Funny how an obese man has never appeared on the cover of Men’s Health. You wonder why
True or false: have you ever directly answered a question I asked at any point? You haven’t but the facts aren’t your side. Instead you do all this delusional mental gymnastics bullshit in a vain attempt to get your way. Well it is working. Facts don’t care about your feelings. If your obese you are going to have a health conditions and shorter lifespan. There is a reason why it shouldn’t be glamorized as being acceptable.
And I am not a “bully” for pointing out the facts. In fact I was bullied in grade school for being a fat unathletic kid. Was i content by just feeling sorry for myself? No I made a DECISION to change my life. I got involved with tough sports and instead of playing video games I went on long runs and bike rides in my neighborhood.
Deep down @shaysh87 there are just a lot of things you hate about yourself and you wish the world would
change for you. It won’t no matter how much feminism and “fat acceptance” crap you push you will not change general male preferences. I know are envious and jealous of your prettier and skinnier female counterparts who get more attention than you. But unless you are willing to change yourself than tough luck. You are not entitled to the attention of an attractive high value male.
The good news is you have a problem that CAN be changed. It’s not an easy change but you have to make a personal decision to make a lifestyle change. If you just put half the effort into exercising more and eating better vs. being a social justice warrior you might find yourself having a happier life.
@globetrotter22
You're accusing me of "hating myself"? how? in what way do i hate myself? you're saying that because I'm overweight, then I MUST hate myself?
I want to be on cover of a magazine. does that sound like a woman that is ashamed of herself? NO.
I wear bathing suits to go swimming regardless of if people like my body or not.
look at you, you are now insisting that I should be ashamed of myself because I'm arguing that fat people should have the right to be on covers of magazines. how are you not a bully?
@globetrotter22
[The good news is you have a problem that CAN be changed. It’s not an easy change but you have to make a personal decision to make a lifestyle change. If you just put half the effort into exercising more and eating better vs. being a social justice warrior you might find yourself having a happier life.]
Listen you fucking liar. You spend the first 100 comments making fun of fat people about how they're so ugly and that they should never ever be seen on convers of magazines. You were never ever concerned about anyone's health so you can quit pretending.
you're just a discriminating piece of shit who goes around saying fat people shouldn't be able to have the right to do this, or to do that. now you're acting as if you're not a bully or that you're morally correct.
how are you morally correct if you're violating people's human right?
@globetrotter22
now you're assuming that I can't get any guy's attention. guess what? I've had plenty of guys who were willing to go out with me. And many of those who had feelings for me that I couldn't return.
so you can quit your bullying about how I can't get any man's attention, ok?
we can see your little bully desperate to pull others down.
@shaysh87 okay if you have no problem in the romance department than why are you so angry and radical? What exactly has motivated you to go so ballistic? Truth is I highly doubt you are happy with your life. If you were you wouldn’t be wasting your time going berserk against people who logically disagree with you.
Also as for bullying let’s see what you have said to me and others so far:
- You refused to acknowledge that there are violent females who can harm men in given scenarios.
- You told another woman that you hope “her conservative husband beats her”. That one was a real gem when it comes to your credibility. Just saying (cough)
- You have called me a sexist, stupid, misogynist, dumbass, idiot, etc. despite me never once calling you a name. I haven’t even called you a derogatory political label (e. g. femnazi, libtard, etc)
- You refuse to acknowledge cold hard scientific facts e. g. obese people have shorter lifespans
- You haven’t acknowledged about being wrong about anything. I admitted i made mistake commenting on your post. I am on my mobile phone and when I clicked the first gag notification i mistakenly thought you commented on my own post on here. My initial response to you (about staying separate lanes) was only thing I regret saying considering I first inadvertently commented on your post.
However all that above and yet you have the nerve to call me a “bully”. Do you even know what a “bully” really is? Maybe you should check the mirror.
@globetrotter22
Because fat people can do Watever the hell they want just like skinny people. Who the fuck gave you the right to say that fat people always need to be hidden in society? I can APPEAR ANYWHERE I WANT. I can even wear a bathing suit to go to the beach.
I don’t care about what HATERS like you have to say about it.
Haters gonna hate…
Continue hating bitch, you can’t tell me what to do
@globetrotter22
And here is another thing :
People plague overweight people with such a cloud of negativity such as if you’re overweight then that means you must not have a romantic life. If you’re overweight then you should never ever be seen in magazines or ur you’re overweight you should never ever go to the beach cus you’re too fat. Why are you clouding overweight people wirh so much negativity? Many us actually DO HAVE DATING LIVES.
What does Any of this have to do with you? Your life can’t be perfect if you're spending a significant chunk of time obsessing on hating on others.
People who always love to say something bad about other people , never tend to have anything good to say about their own lives
Oh let’s just read the “fucking liar” insult. I didn’t expand that one earlier. Nice. Real nice. Well good luck saying that to people if you want to persuade them of your POV.
@shaysh87 you are miserable and depressed because of YOU. You choose the place you are on. Not “patriarchy”. Not “fat shaming”. Not “oppression”. Not even male dating preferences.
The truth is you need God. You keep trying to find a meaning to your life and you think woke políticos is the answer. It’s seductive because it makes it easy to believe that your problems aren’t your fault. But they are. It’s all about your outlook on life and your refusal to change your life habits.
@globetrotter22
I can be Watever weight I want. I don’t need haters like you talking shit behind my back. It’s a free country. What makes you think I shouldn’t be seen in society just cus I’m overweight? What makes u think I shouldn’t go to the beach cus I’m overweight?
I can do Watever I fucking want or go anywhere I want without Haters like you talking shit
@globetrotter22
[you are miserable and depressed because of YOU. You choose the place you are on. Not “patriarchy”. Not “fat shaming”. Not “oppression”. Not even male dating preferences.]
why would you say I'm depressed? so according to you, all overweight women MUST be depressed and do not have romantic lives?
nice way of shitting on overweight women again.
because I know for a fact that I'm not depressed, and I do have tons of men who like me. It's not hard for me to get a guy interested after a first date. In fact I have met up with 30 guys from dating apps over a span of 3-4 years, none of them ever said my weight was a problem. Not everyone is fat phobic like you.
@globetrotter22
I honestly think YOU'RE MISERABLE in your life. why would someone who is happy with their own life, need to spend days , hours to write a million comments talking shit about overweight women?
who dedicates that much effort and time to degrade others?
as you said before there are guys out there who do like overweight girls. And then now you're saying, that nobody is ever attracted to overweight girls. how desperate are you to try to pull people down?
and yes, you ARE BULLYING if you're gonna make false assumptions about me and my dating life purely according to my weight. you don't know personally know me so how do you know that I can't ever get a date?
And by the way people who are content with their lives usually don’t go around calling people “fucking liars” and “pieces of shit”. Nor do they go on long rants and diatribes. They don’t tell other women they hope their husbands will beat them. So no I don’t believe you on that. Not for a second.
And while I do believe you can dates (fortunately for you men are less picky) I don’t think you are getting what you really want. I think you are seeing skinnier and prettier getting attention from men that you wish that would notice you. It’s driving you nuts with envy and jealousy so of course that motivates to blame society for your problems. You feel entitled to that attention but no one is entitled to anything.
Respect is not same thing as sympathy. You said it yourself that “respect is earned”. Your words. Well you got two choices to earn more respect: improve yourself or become an “activist” and blame every one else for your problems. You have chosen the latter option and it’s never going to be fulfilling. It’s seductive (and trendy) but it’s an exercise in futility.
@globetrotter22
[And while I do believe you can dates (fortunately for you men are less picky) I don’t think you are getting what you really want. I think you are seeing skinnier and prettier getting attention from men that you wish that would notice you. It’s driving you nuts with envy and jealousy so of course that motivates to blame society for your problems. You feel entitled to that attention but no one is entitled to anything. ]
I have guys who are chasing me who tell me that they don’t hate skinny girls. How about that?
You spent days shitting on how all women are evil just cus 1 woman hit a man. Now you’re here continuing to spend weeks to talk shit about overweight women
I think the one who is MISERABLE IS YOU. Continue to hate on all women cus you can’t get a woman in real life. You sound like you don’t even get any attention from any women including fat women.
@shaysh87 The mental gymnastics you are doing is borderline comical but it’s not working. My whole argument with you has nothing to do with what you or I take personally. I could care less if I offend you or not.
However my fathers generation underestimated far leftists. They just wrote them off as nuisance that stayed on college campuses. They were wrong. People like you DO inflict damage on society. You radically impact politics, you change laws in your favor, you control the media, you brainwash young children in education systems, you enact censorship in big tech, you push cancel culture and have no low you won’t sink to just get your way. But ironically “your way” ultimately makes you miserable. When you sabe age men you also sabotage women.
So nope i don’t ignore people like you any more. We are fighting back, standing our ground, paying attention to politics, getting more involved and above all we do NOT apologize for existing.
I am NOT sorry that I disagree with you.
@globetrotter22
I actually have guys who call me beautiful as I walk down the street. I have coworkers who get the jitters when they see me. I currently have someone at work who just called me mami chula which in Spanish means gorgeous or sexy.
So, yea. It contradicts absolutely everything you’ve said about me , how no man would ever give me attention or tjay I could
Never get a date.
Bitch, I’ve been on 30 dates online over the past few years. None of them ever had a problem with how I look.
Because even in the smallest of non-sexual related micro-interactions, it can & often is shown to be an issue/something unnattractive or not sought after.
It's women that make it an issue. Women should be less shallow.
You really think guys are the ones that obsess about this? Have you taken 5 mins on GAG to see how much women post and comment about height? They bring it up all the time. Way more than guys do.
I see men bring it up waayy more than women do. Penis size and height, all the time
@Subarugirl you really believe that? Can you give me an example of a guy having a height requirement on a dating app? I’ve seen several girls post they will only date guys who are 6ft or táller.
Fortunately I am 6ft. But still i think it’s ridiculous.
Well it goes with out saying that most men wouldn't date a woman taller than he was but I have seen men make size requirements especially when it comes to weight. "no fatties allowed" "can't weight more than I do" etc
@Subarugirl yes men do notice weight. I’ll give you that.
But weight and fitness is something that can be controlled. I do realize that’s more difficult for some people than others. However men have literally no control over their height. It’s genetically determined at birth.
I once dated a 5’ 11’’ girl. When she had heels on she was taller than me. It didn’t mind one single bit. I didn’t even think about it.
well most men aren't comfortable with a girl taller than they are, but they can get really picky about other things like body type, breast and boob size and that kind of thing. It's a two way street. With surgery height can change just like breast augmentation they have limb lengthening surgery.
@Subarugirl im not picky. Sure i have preferences but my preferences are NOT requirements. She has to flexible, giving and honest. She has to RESPECT me. She has to be attractive enough for me to want to sleep with her on a consistent basis.
But truth is I hate “plastic women”. If a girl gets breast augmentation it’s an instant turn off. I actually like cute natural smallish breasts. Sure there are “breast men” out there but it’s a non issue for me. I’ve seen all shapes and sizes. It’s not a big deal.
I really think women compare and compete about this more then men do. The only thing i will admit is healthy body weight is requirement. It’s not just about looks but health. She doesn’t need to be a fitness model but she needs to keep herself in shape.
Well in my experience, men are way more concerned with size than women are.
@Subarugirl there is some truth to that. But I will never hold a woman to higher standard than myself.
by the way i have been “size catfished” 2 or 3 times on dating apps. I knew the girl was no twig but when she showed on the date she was even bigger in person.
I was still nice to them but when they followed afterwards I just told them (politely) that I wasn’t interested. I didn’t tell them why. In fact both men and women shouldn’t give a reason for turning the other person down unless they are asked in my opinion.
But I work out every day, watch what i way and limit my alcohol intake. I have a very nice body for my age. Do i expect the same of my love interest? No. But i do expect her to take care of herself vs. complaining about “fat shaming”.
*watch what i eat
Height is not an issue at all. I'm 6ft+ (182cm+) and my ex-wife was barely 5ft (152 cm). My SO is 5ft8in (172 cm) and I've dated women of various heights.
I think she means why is a guys height a big deal to them
Erm it’s not
it’s like the last thing on any list when you are with someone or interested in them
People can pretend but it'll always happen.. Being short makes the guy less attractive... and you can't be short and a hunk... But hey.. Most guys are taller than most girls.. So, it's not really a big problem..
It's an issue for them because the women they want to date have a minimum height requirement to ride.
I lived in manhattan for a time and a few of my friends who were short or average height had trouble dating.
Because there are women that will only date a guy a certain height or above. There’s a lot less women willing to date a short guy.
Men are way more obsessed with size that women are in general.
Why? Because women make it a criterion breathing going on a date or not. That is why. Of course the fact that men can't do anything about their height escapes most women or they simply just don't care.
But short guys are cute!!
I’ve dated many actually.
Maybe you just haven’t met the right one?
Maybe we make too much fun because of their ridiculous insecurity in this topic?
Should we stop? No, it's too funny.
blame on social media and online dating such as tinder and bumble that has made Height requirements. is mainly be on dating apps and site that have same isuse.
I will say this much, I am blessed to be 6'1" and to me it is the perfect height because I LOVE the shorties 5'0 to about 5'4" or 5'5". Although some taller and sexy women are 🔥... I gotta have my shorties!!!
Are you sure you're presenting this correctly because I thought it was woman who were obsessed w/ height you literally started by saying tall guys are attractive. I dont think height matters that much to men though.
It’s an easy excuse which is rationalized by some woman’s preferences
From my view it could be that the situation could be, and he is short too, instead of, but at least he is tall...
Just see from the outside bc I'm pretty tall
for a lot of women its 'taller than m or no deal' over something they can't fundamentally change.
but i always say there's other fish in the sea.
Two possibilities
Some guys are legit rejected cause of their height and made to feel inferior cause of it.
Some just use it as an excuse to deflect from the actual issues they have
...
Because men are rejected over their height which they have absolutely zero control over?
I haven't the foggiest. Ask @mcheetah. He has a monopoly on height issues.
It sometimes is, when the guy is, let's say, more than 4 inches shorter.
I am 5'5 my man is 5'9, is that considered tall? I've never much thought of it.
That's because you're 30 and pretty much out of the shallow stage, whereas men feel inferior and take it as a blow to their ego to date a taller woman. Some will, butmost won't date taller.
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