I just got shot down when I thought things were good?

[1-3-2-4]

This sucks I’m trying to decide it because she (yesterday) texted me super early showing me what she made for breakfast then after that nothing from 3:56 Am to 4:30 pm and it was just her saying she was moody and not really in the mood to talk.

Then this morning she was talking again.. So I was telling her I’ll stop by to see her.. she laughed it off and then said maybe you can see my sister, I told her I wanted to see her.. then I got the text message.

it went a long the lines of she’s been thinking that she’s not really in the position to date anyone because she just got out of a serious relationship and she’s not looking to date for a indefinite amount of time, she said I’m a good friend but she just kind of wants to chill by herself. Then she’s like I’m sorry I didn’t tell you sooner I don’t feel a romantic attraction.

it kinda has me thinking what did I do? I thought the first date went well after all was done I gave her a kiss on the cheek and she went back to her car smiling.

Updates

+1 y

Ladies feel free to chime in!

[Anonymous]

If you see her as better than you, above you, or that you are the lucky one... she will not be as attracted. If you were nice, polite, did not flirt, did not bring sexual tension or uncertainty, she will be less attracted. If you did not tease, were always showing your hand, and she was certain you were interested, then she will lose attraction to you.

But, what she expects from you now is to chase her, to try to convince her, and to try to change her mind. If you say something like 'ok no worries, it was good knowing you, tc' it's likely she will try to reconnect because you aren't responding in the way she sees you.

Also, ask yourself this question and be honest. 'Do I have a scarcity mindset when it comes to women?'

If the answer is yes, then you've already failed.

[1-3-2-4]

I flirted via text and a little on the phone I’m the one that asked her out and got her number.. the look when I gave her a kiss she was very excited.. she told me she does not really celebrate her birthday and I baked a cupcake and gave her a card and flowers..

In my response to her text I told her I respect her and that she is a amazing woman and I hope this does not mean we will ignore each other and I left it at that..

It pretty much will have to cause her to respond.

[Opinion Owner]

Unfortunately baking her the cupcake and giving her a card and flowers would have had the opposite effect (killed attraction). Telling her she was an amazing woman and that you respect her... again the opposite effect. Your last comment also shows you care more than she does.

Most women are not healthy relationship minded and are not attracted to nice gestures, or declarations of respect, or nice treatment.

If you minused all of those things and just stayed with the little flirting then it would have been a different outcome.

[1-3-2-4]

She loved the cake and was saying she couldn’t wait to have it with her tea.. all I said to her after was looks like the flowers are doing well and that’s it. And apparently they know my name and that I sent the flowers.

Will she say something later.. probably? Not sure I do know the flowers with the happy birthday balloon will be a constant reminder.

[Opinion Owner]

She may have said that, but look at her actions. If you cease all contact, she will contact you again.

[1-3-2-4]

And that’s what I wonder what she’s going to say if she finally does respond.

[Opinion Owner]

It will be something vague asking how you're doing. But she will only be contacting you for validation, so you need to ask yourself whether it's worth it.

[1-3-2-4]

You think so? I could see that I left the conversation saying the flowers still look good she might say something at the time she throws them out

[1-3-2-4]

Well she texted back but it was just about what I said yesterday but it seems she’s trying to get me to like her sister which I saw her yesterday she’s too shy for me..