Indian girl told me her family would never accept me and it made me hate myself for the past couple of weeks. Has this ever happened to you?

[Anonymous]

Where a girl rejects you because of your ethnicity or race? I am Hispanic and we really liked each other. Talked on the phone for hours, FaceTimed and all.
We got along so well in a way I have never clicked with someone before. Then she told me “oh so you’re like 80% Mexican then? My family would never accept you. I’ll help you find another girl?” I was really hurt and just stayed quiet. It took a toll on me honestly and I’ve just been hating everything about myself. She started hardcore asking me questions about my family’s race and I told her my grandpa was white and great grandpa and both married a Mexican girl. That’s why she started figuring out what percent Mexican I was and what not

[oiqt99]

This is a tough situation and I'm sorry you had to go through that. I don't think it was right to say it bluntly in the way she did, but it could be a reality for her family. The thing is though, her family does not know you. Therefore, they cannot hate you. It's true that a lot of people tend to hold prejudices against other races, and it sucks. Even my parents who are in an interracial marriage still hold prejudice against other races! With that being said, you must also understand that she comes from a very different culture who views marriage very differently as well. Marriage tends to be something that must satisfy the family first and foremost. But, if you really like this girl, you could continue and hopefully in the future she could gain the courage to present you to her family. It's not impossible, but it would definitely take a lot of love and strength. To do any of this, you first need to love yourself. Be proud of your heritage, because it is apart of you. To hate yourself because of your race/ethnicity, is like hating your own family. It's also important to remember that that's not all that defines you. It's one aspect of yourself that you cannot change and you should be proud of. But you are so much more than your race. Meaning, there's so much more to love about you!
Again, this girl's family does not know you. They might have their prejudices, but that does not have anything to do with you.

Stay strong buddy :)

[Cherry234]

No this hasn't happened to me. Please don't hate yourself for this. You did nothing wrong. She really hurt you and she should have been more diplomatic. You'll find someone better than her.

[TheLoneTerran]

That's rough man, sorry it happened to you. It took me a long time to figure this out so I hope I can save you some time, don't hate on yourself for something you don't have any control over. Skin color, ethnicity, bone structure, height, etc., anything like that. There's nothing that can be done, except maybe height but the surgery is horrificly painful, so I don't recommend.

Additionally, if it was over something that you CAN change, you'll have to want to make the change yourself. You want to gain weight and get stronger, you want to lose weight and be healthier, you start moonlighting for some extra cash flow. Do it because you want to, not for someone else, and especially not to appeal to them. Chasing that kind of approval never ends well and even if you manage to force yourself to stick with whatever you're changing, the journey will be much more difficult if you're heart isn't in it.

I'm sure there are plenty of sayings or quotes to sum it up but basically, if you have no control over something, worrying about it doesn't do you any good. If it is something you can change, and you want to change it, then go for it. You might, or probably will, have a couple false starts as you figure things out. That's fine too. It may feel like it sometimes but you don't have to do a perfect job on your first attempt haha.

Whatever route you decide to go, best of luck to you.

[Anonymous]

Want to know where you and I differ? If I was told what she told you, I wouldn't hate myself, I would hate her and her whole race for thinking they were better than me!
I'm not racist, not until someone hates my race first!

[Aurora1010]

Why would you hate yourself over someone else's racist bs? Get a better girl who actually cares about you

[Iron_Man]

Yes it has on here