True or false: if a girl friend zones a guy, it’s quite likely she was never attracted to him in the first place?

[Anonymous]

True

False

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

That may be true in some cases but not in all cases...
You can have attraction for someone but not be a good fit relationship wise.. Some people are meant to be just friends and some are meant to be more.
We don't always have control about who we fall for and who we don't..

[Sleeptalk]

I can only speak for myself, but I've for sure had a crush on few of my guy friends. Since we were friends, I didn't tell them and it stayed platonic. I got to know them better as a person through friendship as time went on. Needless to say, I would stop having feelings for them the more I found out about them, so this is not necessarily true. People can lose feelings.

[Asker]

Why do you stop having feelings for them? What would the guy need to do to stop this?

[Sleeptalk]

Well like anyone else, once you get into those deep conversations about politics, parenting, money management etc.. (you know the things you should talk about with someone you're interested in) it goes south from there when you don't agree with them

[WindAtMyBack]

"Quite likely" is pretty vague. But I don't think you can assume that she was never attracted to him. She could have been attracted to him but he didn't make a move fast enough. Which is actually pretty common as near as I can tell. If a guy doesn't make a move, she will probably assume his intentions are friends.

[Asker]

Is this true though? I think in such cases, there was just never a spark.

[WindAtMyBack]

I think it's pretty darn common. I don't know if the majority never had a spark or not. But even if it's the majority, there are still large numbers when the guy had a chance but didn't move fast enough.

Guys need to make a move and do it fairly quickly. Not doing that is probably one of the biggest mistakes guy make.

[Asker]

What do you mean by not making a move? Going for a kiss?

[WindAtMyBack]

Asking her out. Tell her you are interested. Have a friend tell her you are interested. Maybe go for a kiss **IF** there is obvious chemistry - then go slowly and give her a chance to pull away. You definitely don't want to go for a kiss out of the blue. Write her a note.

It doesn't really matter as long as you give some clear indication that you are interested.

This used to be fairly common knowledge among guys, but I don't see guys on here bring this up much. I do see girls bring it up though. They don't come right out and say it, but it's fairly common at GaG for girls to say a guy they have a crush on hasn't made a move, so they assume that he is not interested. I always tell them that they can't assume that because he might be shy or something. But by default then tend to assume it anyway.

Girls still expect guys to make the first move. Even girls who are willing to make a move probably wait for the guy to do it first. It amazes me that girls can have a huge crush on a guy and not make a move or say a word to him. They agonize over it, but still don't make a move.

[Asker]

What if the guy did ask her out but on every date, he just acts like a friend and doesn’t try to flirt or be romantic?

[WindAtMyBack]

First, it needs to be clear that it's a date. If it's not clear it might send mixed signal. If he doesn't make more of a move, eventually she'll assume it's not a date and only hanging as friends.

You need to make a move, but you also need to keep moving it forward.

I know it can be really hard to do sometimes, but the best thing to do is talk like two adults. It never hurts to talk.

[Asker]

Move if it forward if unwanted or form wrong can be labelled as harassment though.

[TheMajesticKing777]

Sounds like there might be truth to that depends tho cause sometimes they friendzone for reasons that made them lose interest in that person

[Anonymous]

Yeah probably