My boyfriend and I have a wonderful and beautiful relationship. He's sweet and looks out for me, and he has my best interests at heart. However- I have this strong, nagging feeling he doesn't think particularly highly of my intelligence. I am clumsy and uncoordinated, and have a tendency to be a bit inattentive. This leads to me making simple mistakes (I'm not a great driver, I drop and break things, etc.). I got extremely frustrated with myself the other day after I broke something at home, and I began to cry. He asked me why I was crying and told me that I needed to pull myself together. I said that it was just frustrating to struggle so much with things that shouldn't be so hard, and to feel like I can't do anything about it. He told me not to make such a big deal about it, because all girls are ditzy and airheaded, and I just can't help it. He basically said that he does not get upset with me when I make those mistakes because he doesn't truly expect me to know any better or be competent on my own, even saying that I was smart for finding someone like him to take care of me. He finds that women commonly struggle with basic life tasks, and would rather I focus on just doing my best and not reacting so emotionally when I make these mistakes. He's right that it's not very mature to cry over making simple mistakes, and I know that I have to work on this. However, I spent much of my life investing self-worth into my intelligence, and coming to the realization that I have this intellectual ceiling I cannot circumvent has been very demoralizing. Any advice for dealing with either being seen as dumb, or being actually dumb?
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+1 y
I should also note, he's almost 7 years older than me, so I think he has a bit of a tendency to "parent" me in some respects.
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