Is my boyfriend too old for me?

[Anonymous]

Yes

No

[Anonymous]

Not really.

My parents were 27 and 43 when I was born and they got on perfectly well. They were a very happy couple until my dad passed away.

You're both consenting adults, so if you both, truly love each other, even a 16 year age gap doesn't really matter much, in my experience.

[Haha456]

it won't matter when they're 27 and 43 but it will matter when they are 45 and 61. When you're still young and vibrant, you find yourself married to a senior citizen grandpa. This is when the hardships start arising.

[Opinion Owner]

@Haha456 Well, it didn't seem to matter. My dad was 56 when he died. Even in the last year of his life, my parents never had any problems.

[Haha456]

@novacourier

thats another problem. If your dad died at 56, this means your mother is widowed at 40, which is very young. She will likely be spending the remaining 30-50 years of her life dying alone. Its very common for spouses with huge age gaps to be spending 30+ years of their remaining years dying alone. If your mother was unhappy about this, she might not necessarily have told you. She might've been sexually dissatisfied with your father for many years, she might not necessarily have told you. 56 and 40 is when the differences start settling in. It only gets worse when she is 45 and he is 61.

Not many people want to spend their remaining 30-40 years of their life dying alone, especially since women live longer than men. If your husband is 20 years older than you, be prepared to spend a big chunk of your remaining years dying alone.

[Haha456]

There have also been studies that shown that couples with larger age gaps tend to have higher rates of divorce. The bigger the age gap, the higher the chance of divorce. The martial satisfaction for these couples also tend to see a have bigger decline in marital satisfaction after the initial 6-10 years of marriage compared to couples more similar in age.

[Opinion Owner]

@Haha456 Good God... I was only speaking from experience. By the way, my mother was devastated by my father's death and only once did she make a somewhat half-hearted attempt to persue a relationship with my dad's closest friend several years later, which she broke off within months, because "he just isn't your dad". Also, for medical reasons, her life expectancy is about 20 years less than average, something she actually considered in her dating life. My life expectancy is even lower, so I may also choose an older partner, assuming they have normal life expectancy.

[Haha456]

@novacourier

Not many people would be interested in hoping they die 20 years earlier so they can avoid the loneliness that comes from spending their remaining 30+ years dying alone.

Another reason why couples with huge age gaps still stick together is because they tend to get severely attached to each other after seeing each other every day for so many years. It does not necessarily mean they are fulfilled. Likely they know they will be happier with a spouse around their own age. But they just can't leave because they are too attached to each other.

Most people who marry significantly older spouses tend to regret it as they get older. I've seen many advise me on not to marry too much older. But they won't divorce their spouses because they are too attached to each other. Personally I can't imagine myself being happy being married to a grandpa. It would feel like I'm settling for a subpar marriage.

[Opinion Owner]

@Haha456 Quite frankly, it seems to me you are making a lot of generalised assumptions about my own parents, in which case, I must resent your implications.

[Haha456]

@Opinion owners,

Studies actually show that larger age couples tend to have higher divorce rates, less resilient marriages, and decreased satisfaction.

[Haha456]

Studies actually show that larger age gap** couples tend to have higher divorce rates, less resilient marriages, and decreased satisfaction.

[Opinion Owner]

@Haha456 That says nothing about my parents whatsoever. Again your applying a general statistic to two people. Were they in a minority? Maybe, but if nothing else, I simply know that it can be done, even if it is harder. Not everyone fits into the same box of statistics.

Most relationships fail, regardless. As do most other things. Companies, bands, newspapers, etc. It really doesn't mean much.

I don't expect that I will ever have a relationship, marry or have children, anyway, so it matters even less in my case.

[Haha456]

@Opinion Owner,

Yea, sure exceptions do exist. But vast majority of people would have issues being married to someone significantly older. Its not something I would encourage. Not only is being married to a grandpa when I'm in my 40s unpleasant. Spending the last 30+ years of my life dying alone isn't fun either. You can't grow old with someone who is already old. Right now it could be fun but eventually it will come back to bite you in the ass hard.

[AviatorTom]

That's up to you. Age difference is just a number. My father was 30 years older than my mother and they were married for 40 years until he died. If you two are happy together, why worry about age?

[affectioncrave]

Reminds me a bit of pairs in 90 Day Fiancé-

But if there's true love, respect and you both are adults then there's no problem in my opinion! The president in my country has an age-gap of 29 years with his wife, but they have children and seem happy and genuine together.

[Haha456]

yea, he looks like an old man. I can't imagine why anyone would date someone who looks like him unless they had an old man fetish. Vast majority of girls aren't dating someone who looks like that.

[HighValue]

No. As long as you are happy together and have compatible morals and compatible long term life goals it shouldn't matter what other people think. Make yourself and the people you care about happy, and don't worry about the opinions of strangers that don't care about you.

[Jouth]

Does he slam with the camshaft ham?

If so, then you're all good. Age difference is not as important as maturity difference, so as long as you're both on the same page in that regard and can dongle the dingle, you're good to go, no need to be single.

[LexiXide]

No 1 else can decide how old your boyfriend has to be for you to love him if you love him then that's a good for you you don't have to break up with him just because of other people's opinions

[nachosaresexy]

Homeboy looks pretty old but that says nothing about his intentions & character in the relationship. Most relationships are going to fail, so just trust your instincts at step along the way.

[MCheetah]

Probably. You look 18-20, he looks 40-something. More like father and daughter than anything. But whatever; date whoever you want that makes you happy, as long as they're an adult.

[Robbey]

You’re a grown woman. If you two are into each other and you’re enjoying yourself, then I don’t think he’s too old for you.

[Blackcosmo]

As long as you're happy that's all that matters. You're both adults.

[WhitneySnow]

He looks a lot older than you but it’s none of our business

[KatherineJ]

As long as you are an adult, and he’s the one you want to be with, then it’s totally fine.

[Phoenix98]

I personally don't care and what I mean is so long as your both legal and like each other go for it.

[ChrisMaster69]

If you have to ask the internet, then yes he is, otherwise you would just be happy with him.

[NamerOfStars]

If you're both legal adults and are happy together, that's all that matters.

[LimitedBenefits101]

Older men with younger women as it should be

only people that are mad are women in their 30s no man in their age range wants them🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

[Monah4billion]

Yes. I think he is. No insult but I would mistake him for your dad or mentor

[Wubs3000]

Its your choice as long as you are both consenting adults

[Avicenna]

No, you're both adults and that doesn't say whether you're compatible, which is what counts

[MannyFrs]

he's too old unless you are trying to cash in on life insurance lol

[spartan55]

Hopefully she's not spiking his coffee with antifreeze.

[Anonymous]

He looks like your father or uncle or something. Not that I care of course

[Anonymous]

Women are of marraige age at 16 whereas men are at marraige age at 30.

[SoftCliff]

Maybe if you still live in the Middle Ages

[_deeznuts]

lol no he's still hoping to get married

[IesusHominumSalvator]

That's right... most women start looking like garbage at 30, specially if they do orgies, drink alcohol and party a lot... While most men can still look good till late 40s.

[Opinion Owner]

@IesusHominumSalvator becomes increasingly difficult for them to bare children too.

[SoftCliff]

@_deeznuts Lol yeah it seems so 😂

[SoftCliff]

@IesusHominumSalvator my mom and most women in my family look way younger than their age. Also, there are other women too, who look good at 30 and there are men, who are balding at that age.. It has to do with genetics, lifestyle, diet, taking care of yourself, not gender etc.

[SoftCliff]

Anon, lots of women have kids and get married nowadays in their early 30's. This is 2022, not 1022

[Opinion Owner]

@SoftCliff yes I'm sure your mother doesn't have saddlebags as tits...

[SoftCliff]

And I'm sure you aren't some balding incel troll with a beer belly

[Opinion Owner]

@SoftCliff incel isn't a real thing. No a 30 year old man who keeps himself fit, healthy and makes good money has his pick of women in their prime attractive years 16-30

[AuroraBorealis20]

16 is a minor. Congrats, so you're a pedo

[Opinion Owner]

@AuroraBorealis20 congratulations your Islamaphobic and racist...

[AuroraBorealis20]

I don't see any racist or Islamophobic comments here... On the other hand 16 is below 18, hence a minor

[Opinion Owner]

@AuroraBorealis20 not in the Muslim countries or Europe. On the other hand you can buy a military weapon and shoot up a school in America at age 16

[Blueeyes81]

I don't know, is he? It should only matter what you two think.

[Luopio27]

You are above 25, with the right to date anyone from 18 - 125 years old.

[AimeeKyle]

Age is just a number. Do what you feel is best for you….

[Zolly99999]

If you are both happy then no and don't listen to other people

[Xtendable]

Nah, as long as he can keep up for, I mean, with you 😉

[Bklynbadboy12]

Listen you're an adult and he's an adult if you're like each other go for it

[Anonymous]

Probably. But who cares if you're both happy.

[NewsReader]

People might think he is your sugar daddy

[1GoldTwins]

No. You love him? That's good enough.

[EmmaMary]

Just how old is he?

[abc3643]

Only you can answer this question.

[FictionalCharacter]

Looks like a nice guy

[Guy13]

He looks 12-15 years older than you...

[fonduegirl]

Obviously. Looks like your father.

[hayley2008]

If you're happy then it makes no difference

[Anonymous]

that's your stepdad

[Anonymous]

if you are 25-29 years old, then no

[OddBeMe]

I mean…he does look like your dad.

[Andres77]

Is his equipment working?

[HippieVeganJewslim]

No! Age is a number. Love is love.

[pizzalovershouse]

Can't say cuz that's up to you to decide

[Iron_Man]

I don’t think so how old is he?

[msc545]

If you love him it doesn't matter

[Fuentes]

He looks old but you're both past 18 lol

[icetome]

both have mask so i cannot relate

[Adogdog]

I think you can do better.

[SpaceGalaxy]

who cares as along as both of you are happy

[Anonymous]

Wellll, he looks old enough to be your dad.

[Anonymous]

Maybe, how old are you two?

[GoodGuyBreakingBad]

Nope

[RuthlessAggression]

yeah

[lpoots]

you look 14