My boyfriend said I look ugly with my hair up?

[Anonymous]

Is this okay? We were hiking, so I wore my hair up. I think that's normal because it's hot and obviously you get sweaty when you work out. He said I should wear my hair down and clearly it's just a me problem (getting hot wearing my hair down) because other girls wear their hair down. I told him that I thought what he said was mean, but he told me if I respected him and trusted him that I would do as he says. We've been together 5 years and he has said he prefers me with my hair down which is not a problem but I like how I look with my hair up. I'm conflicted because I love him, but I feel he's overstepping. He also said I don't offer anything in the relationship so the least I could do is be attractive.

[PrettyPriya]

Why would you think your (ex) boyfriend is right in berating your looks or anything else? I say ex because that is what he should be right now. I wouldn’t stand for that rubbish. Either you are trolling or clueless. I’m not sure which one yet.

He says you offer nothing to the relationship? Why are you in one with someone who doesn’t value what you bring? That is ridiculous. I would have shown him the door immediately.

As for wearing your hair up, I do mine all the time in a messy bun when home. It is just out of my face and easy. You are allowed to wear it how you want. Same goes for dressing how you want, having friends you want, etc. a relationship is about a number of things, including respect, of which this guy has precisely zero for you. Help yourself and leave him.

[VIVANT]

Agreed!

[VIVANT]

1 “…clearly it's just a me problem (getting hot wearing my hair down) because other girls wear their hair down.”

2 “he told me if I respected him and trusted him that I would do as he says.”

3 “I LOVE HIM”

4 “he says I don’t offer anything on the relationship so the least I Dan do is wear my hair up”

👉🏻 ONE OF THESE THINGS DOES NOT BELONG 🧐

[Aakash_Hangargi]

I think you need to explain what to mean to our folks here like elaborate

[VIVANT]

@Aakash_Hangargi

Just like with the school tests where they put majority of things from one category with one item from another and you have to choose what does not belong. For example, three different pieces of fruit & one piece of meat. The correct answer is the meat bc it does not belong in the group.

All the stuff he says and does, does not belong with her loving him

[Aakash_Hangargi]

Lol i would have never guessed that explanation thanks for explaining

[Anonymous]

Maybe you just look different with it up and he isn’t used to it, some women don’t have the face for short hair either but since you normally have it down it shouldn’t be a problem but I had to laugh about that last part that you do nothing in the relationship so the least you could do is look good. I’m guessing you don’t have much sex or he pays for everything? Either way he is a bit blunt and rude

[Aakash_Hangargi]

Don't listen to anyone lol people try to break you up.

Communicate first was he like this earlier or did he say it in a teasing way although it's odd but you have been 5years together so one might take leniancy depending on how you guys sync with each other

[Chrysantenum95]

I really felt bad for u. That's so mean to say for s/o especially you been 5yrs together,. Both of you should at least respect eachothers flaws not only loving the good ones. What does he even mean u dont offer anything in a relationship? I think u did your best part also for being in that 5 yr relationship.

[qwert1234]

I will be honest. If I read the title alone, I would just say, deal with it. Because while it's his opinion, it's still up to you how to do your hair.

Then I read "if I respected him and trusted him that I would do as he says". Dafuq is wrong with this dude?

Wear your hair however you are comfortable with.

[Guy13]

Boys are sometimes stupid. Don’t worry about it