What does true love feel like?

Question

I’m 31 years old have dated previously 1 guy only but left me mostly heartbroken all the plans and memories went to garbage in a text message.

Somehow I lost hope in love every guy to me seemed the same. My ex would contact me weekly , sometimes we would go days without talking. I was stupid and nice and thought to myself maybe if I try harder and I ask him things will be better. I didn’t have the courage to break up , but I did it.

Now I’m seeing this new guy who’s 37. What I noticed is that from day 1 until now with him I never asked or begged anything things flew normally. It feels amazing and beautiful. Good man exist out there.
However I’m scared of love still! I feel like “what if this is a lie? Is he trying to fool me? And then leave?”
I have all this thoughts in my mind. 😟And I’m worried he will notice my insecurities and will make him leave too. I keep this worries to myself.
I really hope this is a true love from his side! I like him.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

Don’t rush it. Also you learned from your past mistakes so you should be wiser. You will never be perfect but you should have a better understanding of things then you did in the past

However I also warn you to not hit the panic button if you new boyfriend does something negative that reminds of your ex. Take it in and carefully think it though vs letting the negative “emotion” sabotage all your thinking. He’s a different man.

One ex I dated years ago had the gall to first positively compare me to her last ex and later negatively compare me to him (despite me almost never talking by my exes). The positive comparison felt good in the moment but I heard alarm bells ringing in the back of my head. I didn’t listen to them. So she proceeded to treat me like I was less then human later towards the break up.

Anyway remember guys are different then they are the same. Yes we got some common behaviors, quirks and flaws. But we vary by how we REACT to be told about this flaws. So if he does something to upset/disappoint you first calmly point it out Give him a chance to address it vs immediately assuming he’s just like the other asshole guys you’ve met. Maybe he is but don’t prematurely judge until you know for sure

Yes you have been hurt in the past but don’t let that instill prejudice in your mind.

Firesparks · Accepted Answer

I know how your feeling except I have to find a girl that's true n loyal n to whom I can trust period.. sp insecurities I completely understand n I know it feels that when a girl walks in her boyfriend, fiance, husband while he is having sex with another girl except the opposite for me... it nay never go away but I'd say once marriage happens you should be ok but even then you may still be on the look out... cause you never know... otherwise walk n good faith n hope n pray to God that you never half to worry bout it... God speed

sheenagwapa · Accepted Answer

you know if it's true love when you feel accepted. even if you get fat he would still make you feel like you are the most attractive person on earth. he cares about your safety, your health. he is loyal. even if he gets si mad he will not lay a finger on you. he is just so accepting and lovinh.

he will contradict his own rule. i remember my ex before he doesn't lije when i'm eatinh on his car because he doesn't like ants because of thise food particles that can be left. but he just let me be. but on my part i'm also very careful not to make a mess be it liquid or chips.

one time my stomach hurts so much he said it's ok even i poop on his car which just made me laugh. he accidentally mentioned that if i cheat he will still stay with me and he is a very jealous person. but of course i will not cheat.

he loves to spend time with you. i don't know if it's cute or funny but he laughs at me even if i'm not teying to be funny. i am a comedian wannabe and i keep analyzing what i said or do that is funny but nothing is funny. if i know i will keep doinh it.

watercolor_lions · Accepted Answer

For me, true love is when you feel like you can be 100% yourself (your best self even) with that person. And you only want the best things in the world for them.

True love is when their happiness becomes your own. You still have your own sense of identity and hopes and dreams... But whatever makes them happy, truly makes you beam. You might even be more excited about a promotion at work than they are! Because you are happy for them.

You can't help but to forgive and have a compassionate view on them. And they reciprocate the same understanding. There is an "unspoken" understanding that you two just get each other. And mutually feel like you belong.

That is a short, very brief description of what it was like for me.

Sandeeppingping · Answer

I don't know where I've read this, but it goes something like this: one should live with a hurt open heart accessing his spontaneity and love even from that place of vulnerability and pain, than live with a closed heart in denial forbidding himself from such a gift, I stand by it as a concept but I know for a fact it's really tough to do so in real life, it feels like your soul is at stake

dustybiker · Answer

Like you’ve fallen in love with a best friend who would never willingly hurt you. Gooey feelings and fireflies in your belly. Disagreements are easier to tackle with someone you are well-matched with. You understand each other and aren’t out to hurt the other person to get what you want.

Vanidal · Answer

True love is when you say you love me and you actually feel love towards me. That doesn't say that you would loyal to me. You could betray me even when you love me because something else is more important.
Let's imagine you're in love with me. But one day you found someone that in a way that's unexpected, you cheated on me. I could never know if you're not somehow spill that up to me. Being honest is an option. Feeling love is not an option. Telling that you love when you're not is an option.

Gent207-2 · Answer

You have trauma that is deeper than you care to admit and those questions will never go away. However as time marches on through highs and lows those questions will be one easier to answer.

For you will have in your arsenal a collection of indisputable evidence of his love and devotion. Memories of when you are at your lowest and he still says through his words and actions "I choose you"

MementoMori_ · Answer

Love is always a gamble. You put your feelings on the line and take a chance. The alternative is a life without love. Some choose it over taking that chance and the hurt it causes when you lose.

Anonymous · Answer

Once you feel it's the right time, let him know you're in for something serious.

Depending on his answer you'll know if he's the one for you or not.

I mean, supposing that you’re considering marriage when you mentioned about not wanting him to leave.

TroyDT · Answer

To me true love is not a feeling. It is a mutual commitment to seek the better for the other. If it is based on feelings it will inevitably be unstable at times. If both are committed then it isn't based upon "he did this" or "she did that."

exitseven · Answer

It is different. It is exciting and calming at the same time. It is like you finally got somebody to scratch that itch that has been driving you mad for the last 20 years.

Aerolyn · Answer

Doesn't fucking exist. Don't understand why people add the "true" into it. Love exist, but none of this "true love" nonsense, that's fairytale stuff that's too good for us in reality.

brownmale2 · Answer

All new relations tend to be easy at the start.
The chemicals take care of that.
After a while the problems tend to show up.
Sex is the glue of a relationship, but my experience is that women mostly lose an interest in that in a LTR.
Relationships can be a huge challenge in our day and age, as both sides expect so much.
If you're understanding, and willing to give, it makes things somewhat easier. This is for guys too.

Kerrim23 · Answer

True love to me is when you look at that person and you could never handle losing them. You would do anything for him and you all have a mutual understanding of each other

msc545 · Answer

It feels like being high on drugs because actually, you are. When you come down, which you will, you won't like it one bit. Neurotransmitters are the strongest drugs in the world.

Heolurt · Answer

This is a good question, as someone who's never been shown any kind of love, my live is void of it and I don't know how it's supposed to feel or what it looks like, so I am hoping to see some answers that might give me some insight.

Missgingles · Answer

Just be happy with him. No need to overthink

BLP11520 · Answer

Well I never have experienced it yet, my heart has been broken 3 times I am in an unhappy marriage. I have been lied to and treated like shit so. I wish i had a plain Jane who loved me with all her heart...

genericname85 · Answer

do you know what "just love" feels like?

Iron_Man · Answer

It’s so beautiful it’s outstanding absolutely

Jamesshinobi · Answer

it feels like the stupidest thing you ever wish you could do forever.

HaveNoName · Answer

One needs to experience having kids. THAT is the only true unconditional love.

Twalli · Answer

I don't know. I don't know how anyone can know for sure.

What does true love feel like?

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What does true love feel like?

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