So I matched with a guy on hinge a few weeks ago. He’s 29, I’m 24. I’ve gone on 2 dates with him. The first one was dinner at a sushi restaurant followed by ice cream & a game of pool at a nearby pub. It was cold that day, so I wore jeans & a top with a coat. Upon meeting him, I noticed he’s very mature, reserved & smart. He was so mature & reserved that he hardly even smiled & I couldn’t even tell if he was attracted to me. It was very hard to get a smile out of him, he would just pull a very quick smirk here & there.
After dinner we went for a walk around the nearby lake to digest our food before dessert, & we sat down on a bench. There he started squeezing my thighs, massaging my head & then he started making out with me. I thought it was a bit forward for a first date, what do you think?
For our second date which was 2 weeks after the first one, he took me to a middle eastern restaurant & after dinner he asked ‘are you okay to get this?’ Which I wasn’t expecting, but I just said ‘oh yeah sure’ & paid. We then had dessert at a milkshake bar nearby which he paid for. We then ended the night by going to a park, where we walked, sat down & talked, & then he started massaging my shoulders, putting his hand up my skirt & grabbing my hand & putting it over his hard dick which I was uncomfortable with. I told him I don’t wanna do this & he apologised & said ‘you’re right, it’s too early for this’. He asked to plan a 3rd date & I said I’ll think about it because I’ll be quite busy with work in the upcoming weeks, & then he said ‘hmm if you really wanted to see me, you’d make time’ & then I explained that I am trying to make time but I just need to get back to him a bit later after seeing my new work roster for the next fortnight. He then mentioned that he feels like he’s always the one to initiate & then I admitted that I guess I’m not 100% sure about this, & then he said we should just not see each other anymore, & I agreed. What do you think of all this though?
After dinner we went for a walk around the nearby lake to digest our food before dessert, & we sat down on a bench. There he started squeezing my thighs, massaging my head & then he started making out with me. I thought it was a bit forward for a first date, what do you think?
For our second date which was 2 weeks after the first one, he took me to a middle eastern restaurant & after dinner he asked ‘are you okay to get this?’ Which I wasn’t expecting, but I just said ‘oh yeah sure’ & paid. We then had dessert at a milkshake bar nearby which he paid for. We then ended the night by going to a park, where we walked, sat down & talked, & then he started massaging my shoulders, putting his hand up my skirt & grabbing my hand & putting it over his hard dick which I was uncomfortable with. I told him I don’t wanna do this & he apologised & said ‘you’re right, it’s too early for this’. He asked to plan a 3rd date & I said I’ll think about it because I’ll be quite busy with work in the upcoming weeks, & then he said ‘hmm if you really wanted to see me, you’d make time’ & then I explained that I am trying to make time but I just need to get back to him a bit later after seeing my new work roster for the next fortnight. He then mentioned that he feels like he’s always the one to initiate & then I admitted that I guess I’m not 100% sure about this, & then he said we should just not see each other anymore, & I agreed. What do you think of all this though?
What Girls & Guys Said
Opinion
2Opinion
That's the behavior of a guy that is only interested in sex. He was just going through the motions in order to have it, as opposed to being interested in a relationship or anything about who you are. However, there was a big disconnect between his behavior and escalation momentum which is why it felt off. In a way it's lucky he had no idea what he was doing because if he did, you may not have even realised what was going on.
Damn just another guy interested in only getting to the sex. It’s crazy to know how many different types of guys there are & how many different techniques guys use to get sex.
There are the younger & more immature ones that are clear about it from the start & don’t even take you on dates. They just start asking for nudes straight away & ask if you can meet them at a hotel for sex.
Then there are some that tell you at first that they want something serious & once they meet you they only try to get to the sex as soon as they can.
& I used to make the mistake of thinking that an older & more mature guy with a successful career is less likely to be so sexually open like that, but I was so wrong. Any type of guy can be looking for just sex & have different ways of going about it.
At the core of the issue is hookup culture. When the majority of people are just sleeping around, if you're a man that wants more, your only option is to walk away or become just like the others. Thus few men see going on dates as worthy or just assume any girl they date has been sleeping around. Thus the majority of men left 'on the market' are now only interested in sex.'
There is much more to it than that of course but you get the idea.
You do realize that if a guy makes sensual advances without your consent, that is criminal.