As society is evolving, do you believe it’s making it more challenging for a man and woman to be successfully in a long term relationship?

[Anonymous]

I see, read, hear and experience a lot of differences between male and female. It’s become more of a difficult thing to obtain a healthy relationship; man will blame females and woman will blame males, they don’t take sides but they blame individually.
Society evolves and nothing can be fixed there..
So Ladies and Gentlemen, do you believe that society will continue to impair male and females ability to amicably be as one?

Keep your answers short and brief and no bashing - healthy talk!!!

[RingOfFire]

At my age I have seen the evolution that led to this point. Everything changed in the late 1960s through 1970s. The cultural changes that happened in that period of time changed the entire dynamic of relationships between men and women, and in my opinion not for the better. Since then it has been getting worse and worse. The "Womens' Liberation" movement is the primary reason. It led to a society that mistakenly is supposed to believe men and women are the same... not equal... but the same. But of course they are not the same. Over time that concept started to be enforced by an authoritarian hand forcing people to regurgitate the party line or be subject to ridicule and persecution tearing apart the fabric of the society. And now with all the new lunatic gender garbage the dynamic between male and female has been decimated.

So yes, relationships between men and women are more difficult now. But it isn't evolution in my mind, it is devolution.

[JamesDiaz11]

Yes, I believe the social controls against partner hopping and promiscuity are gone, which means people have little incentive not to do so (aside from the damage it does to women mentally/ emotionally). The number of PERCEIVED options has drastically increased (especially for women); so, it's hard for an average girl to be satisfied with an average guy when her DM's are full with thirsty guy liking her pictures (they do this to hundreds of girls with little thought/ standard), which are photoshopped and where leggings accentuate her dead average body.

There is also the emphasis for women to pursue their career before/ over a relationship, which impacts their priorities until it's too late.

Meanwhile, men have become nihilistic with nothing to really strive for, fight for, which in turn has made them turn to porn to further erode their drive to even pursue a woman.

[Nonnabisbish]

I love questions like this. Because you will hear so many men bitch and complain about how hard it is for them now. Women leveled up we can provide for ourselves. A lot of us are not seeking out a provider and protector. What we want is a partner that can offer what we do back to us. And where men fail in this, is the lack of emotional stability and maturity. And communication. It is probably harder for men right now. But if you want that to change or you want to find a girlfriend/ wife, better yourself and work for it. Our society right now is a direct result of mens actions over decades. It sucks you're suffering the consequences but it's a reason for you to push to better yourselves.

[inhua]

"Our society right now is a direct result of mens actions over decades"

what actions are you speaking of?

[Nonnabisbish]

In most recent decades the domestication and indoctrination of women. The laws withholding any rights from women are long gone. But it has taken generations for women to be encouraged to pursue anything outside of being wives and mothers. Religion, entertainment, advertisements all created these guidelines for women to follow in order to be a "good" woman. And this ideal woman was always in service to the men around them. Stepping outside those boundaries would mean social and sadly familial backlash and shaming. Now that these new generations of women have reached the ages you would typically settle down and have a family a lot of question marks are being thrown in the air as to why they are not. Why are they not willing to settle with many men. As a young woman that has all of these options, it genuinely feels like I would be doing a disservice to my mother, her mother, and so on if I simply settle down and forget about my personal ambitions.

[inhua]

sounds a lot like revisionist history and trying to make it one-sided when men went through the same thing too. guidelines to become a good man have existed too but given that women didn't want to follow their guidelines there's no incentive for men to follows theirs either.

if you don't want to be the ideal woman for any man that's up to you but you shouldn't be expecting an ideal man either.

[Nonnabisbish]

I don't argue that men were pushed to fulfill a certain role either. The difference is though men were pushed to have it all. Pursue an education, find a career, get married, have a happy family. And women were pushed into the role of supporting men. I understand basic fundamentals of masculinity and femininity. There is nothing wrong with women in these roles of supporting their man but most women where undervalued and degraded whilst they lived their entire life self sacrificing. I don't think you seem to understand that I am saying these were the ideal gender norms for time not actual ideals. Women have gotten to the point where we have to ability to bring everything to to table without a man by us. Men cannot bring everything to the table with out a woman next to them. And that's the difference and why we will not settle until we find men who can.

[SpokenTruth]

Society was for the most part a happy society during and before the 1950's up until the 1960's when feminism infected the female population. You might want to reexamine your position and do the research to look into what exactly went wrong with society. I guarantee you the everyday man wasn't behind the crashing of society but a minority of men and loads of feminist were and are.

[Nonnabisbish]

Lmao @SpokenTruth society was not happy. Most men were fulfilled sure. Look at the issues housewives had in that time. Female mental health was awful which led to wide spread opiate addictions among the female population, especially stay at home moms. Domestic abuse too on top of that. But it was all over looked because that was the social culture of the 1950s and 60s. Maybe feminism really sprung up because the neglect of women's lives and happiness at the time was finally being addressed.

[SpokenTruth]

No wrong you haven't done any real research then. If you had you would know that feminism sprung up from a nest of eugenicist pushing a brainwash propaganda agenda to wipe out the population and take over a rule the world and by golly with the help of feminist they sure came a long way too haven't they. They couldn't have done it without feminist.

[Nonnabisbish]

Lol bruh you're sounding a bit radical hahahaha

[inhua]

women in those roles were only being undervalued and degraded by the feminists, not society at large. even today men are being undervalued and degraded too for their contributions which get taken for granted e. g. the builders who built skyscrapers and bridges, police officers who keep the streets safe, military personnel who protect the country etc. despite bringing 'everything' they can to the table, women still wouldn't go for a lesser man only a superior man that only exists given the way boys are taught at schools as opposed to girls.

[Nonnabisbish]

@inhua women this day in age taking on the classic housewife role are largely degraded by feminists. I'll give you that and I think that's wrong. When the great majority of women lived in those roles back in the day men took advantage of it. And I can also agree that men can be undervalued especially in manual labor professions. However I believe our definitions of men that bring "everything to the table" are different. The roles men and women have been conditioned to fill are, in simple terms, would be provider+caretaker. Women that are their own providers now look for men who can take care of themselves. If we can do both so can you. The ideal man is not just a man who is successful and able to put bread on the table. We want men who are emotionally mature, that clean and cook, pursue career goals, and can communicate well. Because that is what we are doing and can bring to the table.

[inhua]

back in the day men couldn't take advantage if they had nothing to show for it. no woman was going to accept a marriage proposal from a broke man. there was a formula that at least gave men a blueprint on how to succeed. nowadays its basically what you were born with that determines your success.

"We want men who are emotionally mature, that clean and cook, pursue career goals, and can communicate well. Because that is what we are doing and can bring to the table."

that sounds great on paper but that's not what's being put into practice. what is being seen is different to what is being said. a lot of women are choosing tall hot guys or at the very least hooking up with them and then choosing to settle down with a less attractive provider later on in life. it destroys any incentive for men to want to work hard when other men get what they want with what they were born with.

[Ryfyle]

So men should just kill our emotions then, sounds like a plan.

[Nonnabisbish]

@inhua 1 So are you saying it was okay for men to take advantage of women because they made money? 2 Love and relationships shouldn't need a blueprint. That's where emotional intelligence comes in. There's no exact step by step process that should get you either. Thats not how we work and emotional intelligence is knowing what admirable qualities you have yourself that you would want in a future partner should someone come a long and you vibe with. Emotional intelligence is also finding a greater incentive to be the best version of yourself than getting laid or getting a relationship. 3 Complaining that women only want hot men or men only want hot women is a tale old as time. Its basic biology. The subconscious goes "their face is pleasing or that bitches hips could definitely safely house my offspring" and we chase it. I feel like that's not even a point in this because both genders are guilty of it. I just think it's an easy option to be mad at modern women and say I'm not even gonna try to better myself as a male because there is no point. If that is truly your thinking I'm sorry for you, because you're not proving a point and only hurting yourself in the end

[inhua]

never said men should take advantage over women. I said men should take advantage of the main blueprint that gives them a chance at getting a woman regardless of their genetic disadvantages. now that women can get their own money the incentive for a provider isn't necessary yet women still insist on a superior man. the only purpose women have more men these days is for purely genetic reasons

emotional intelligence is useless when you don't find that someone physically attractive to begin with and then you contradict that by saying they need to better themselves when you've admitted that a provider is no longer necessary

[Anemone978]

Yes.. too many quick meet up apps.. no love... too many lies... not enough loyalty...

[Truth0225]

You call it evolving, I call it degrading. I just actually answered a question like this regarding how social media is the issue. There are too many options mostly on the women’s side on social media. If you create a dating profile of an average looking woman, and and average looking man, you’ll see that the woman will have 100x more offers from men. The availability of options creates a a dynamic where women are constantly going for what is better. And since there is always someone better, relationships are unable to be sustained.

[Qdbrown]

One thing to point out is that all those guys who woe women from dating sites are the hit and quit it crowd. All those jaded and ghosted women become damaged, and assume all guys are bad. Especially the ones that just want to use them. And onced used a lower value SMV will delusionally believe that she has higher value, because they always pick the more attractive bad ones, over and over.

[Truth0225]

@Qdbrown is Facebook or other social media sites a “hit it and quit it crowd” , cmon man be real, these women are not emotionally broken. They have many different options and continuously go after the better option. If you keep eating ramen, and someone offers you a nice Virginia ham, you’re gonna go for the ham because ur tired of the ramen, then if someone offers u a steak, you’ll go for the steak bc now ur tired of the ham. And so on so forth. With social media, there is a greater access of men who are potential suitors. Women have too many to choose from. And even when they get into a real relationship, once there is issues, they are okay not resolving it because the next day they can date someone else.

[FilmGuy93]

I do, yes. But I would say that the reason for that is good. Most relationship issues boil down to people being inconsiderate and people being shitty communicators.

The simple fact is that most people are socially retarded. Now that women need men to do more than bring home a paycheck to make a relationship worth their while, men are struggling to meet those standards because men aren't taught social skills.

Men could learn those social skills, but women suck at communicating their needs, wants, and expectations. Women seriously need to get out of this habit of trying to hint at and allude to things. You're a big girl, use your words. If you can't communicate (or conversely, be receptive to communication), you aren't mature enough to be in a relationship.

Combine that lack of communication with people being self-focused and clueless about the world around them and you get the hell scape that is modern dating.

[RealMarek]

Yes, of course. Having both people work, having businesses open 24/7 and making people work schedules that don’t always line up with their partner’s schedule and make involvement in community organizations and churches difficult, driving up the cost of living while flooding the place with imported labor, the skinner box that we call the internet, hook-up apps… all of these make it way more difficult to find and maintain relationships. What they do serve, however, is a greedy, rapacious elite who want to destroy community and culture in order to reduce people to low cost labor and consumers. Clear them out!

[Anonymous]

The media and political climate is driving all of it… technology then amplifies it. Just stop giving it all the time of day, stay off social media, resist the dopamine kicks… and just be good to people.

It’s unbelievable to me that people need to hear this message in 2023. Like, ‘you are not the center of the universe…’ everyone is not out to get you, just be good to others. Be authentic and honest. Stay out of trouble. Be accountable for your actions and push for your own self-growth each and everyday.

People want the easy way out of everything and when they don’t get it, you get these pathetic outbursts and displays of entitlement. Don’t be that person.

[StephiC]

Religion gave men a structure to access women without showing their 'true colours'. When women fully understand men they're often disgusted. So men generally lie and get caught later/can't maintain the lifestyle or live their truth but struggle to get women.
It's hard to reconcile the two different goals in dating and relationships

[Djaay]

What a crock of shit. Flipping the script huh?

[StephiC]

@Djaay not at all.
Men claim women live in a Disney world and don't accept reality. Even before Disney women were spoon fed a narrative of men being a certain way to get them to marry. Historically, after marraige women either tried to kill themselves or their husbands until they had children and something to live for. It's pretty sad.
Men nowadays tell on themselves early so women don't marry them or if they do - divorce. I do believe the current rate is women initiating 70% of divorces.

[Djaay]

Disney world , nah.. The DEVILS world of witchcraft where the majority reside.

[Qdbrown]

One big problem is that everyone wants instant gratification. They have watched too many movies and think you should be happy in your relationship, and everyone's replacement is a swipe away.

A good relationship takes a lot of work and determination. You can forego that and just serial date forever and never really find someone, because of the constant hopping around, gaming and hijinks of modern online dating world.

[HighValue]

It is more than just a difference between genders. Society is splitting based on morals. Many of the reasons lots of men and women don't get along have to do with moral differences. The most obvious difference is in voting patterns/statistics. More women have liberal morals and more men have conservative morals.

[Angelo75]

I blame the media that puts very high expectations and makes everyone believe they are super special. Kings and Queens.
Instead of just saying everyone is just equal.
Effect is a bunch of entitled spoiled men AND women who keeps expecting unrealistic things from their partners.
And when they dont get it, they consider that they deserve more and just break the relationship instead of staying and fighting for their relationship.

[TheSpaceGnome]

The problem is people have low expectations on compatibility, high expectations on life problem avoidance, and no patience.

If you rush into a relationship at a young age with no thought about the percentage of mental similarity, and you leave a relationship as soon as you hit a financially or emotionally rough patch in life, of course you are going to break up.

[Subarugirl]

Oh no, I dont blame men for anything other than their own actions.
If a guy doesn't meet my standards, that not his problem, it's mine, but I am not going to lower my standards or boundaries either.

The same goes in reverse. If a guy can't find a woman that meets his standards that his problem, not the of the women who dont.

[Qdbrown]

That's a good outlook. You can't control others, but you can control yourself.

[Smoothing]

And that is why she is married and she is only 25.

[Subarugirl]

@Smoothing no, that is part of the reason why I am still married. Any idiot can get married

[Ryfyle]

@Subarugirl
These are not the questions to require a rational response. They require unhinged hyperbole and irrational menace.

[weysally]

yes I do believe its harder to keep a relation going these days, the reason is, most stillwant their freedom, little do they know that if they talk openly to each other that can be resolved, not saying it can be

[Adam1978]

Society isn't evolving its devolving, because it completely discard all values that we learn work from the past. And nothing better is replacing anything.

[milkov]

Yes. There's a lot of breakups nowadays. It's because of the increase of unfaithfulness of an individual, thinking there's many fish in the sea. Where in fact, you only zing once

[genericname85]

well i think this configuration we have currently with life long monogamy is probably not optimal for the diversification of the gene pool which is the purpose of all procreation.

[Nikki1989]

People are brainwashed by what they read on social media and have become more judgmental than ever before. You can see proof of it every day on here.

[Ryfyle]

Agreed, we should nuke Twitter and Facebook and send the internet back to 2006.

[Twalli]

I don't think so. It may be more difficult if you don't evolve with the times. It used to be common to hear about parties and stuff by going to a place where all your school friends hang out, now it's more common to hear about it online.

[gorydetails]

The family unit and marriage is the basis of civilization. If the society is making it difficult for these relationships, that's not evolving, that's destruction.

[OddBeMe]

Ultimately no. I’d say it makes people able to be more picky. So breakups and divorces are more numerous. But the rates of marriage are still high.

[Phoenix98]

Society isn’t evolving it’s devolving and degrading.

[Hardworkingguy]

Perhaps that's one of the reasons why relationships are not lasting as much as before but I don't think that's the biggest reason