Going to a nightclub can be an intimidating experience for anyone, especially for those who are shy or introverted. However, there are some things you can do to help build confidence and ease social anxiety in this setting:
1) Find a friend or group of friends to go with: Having someone you know and trust can make the experience less intimidating and give you a sense of comfort and support.
2) Set achievable goals: Instead of focusing on the idea of having a perfect night, set more achievable goals such as dancing to one song or starting a conversation with a stranger.
3) Focus on the right things: Pay attention to others and ask them questions to take the focus off yourself. Show genuine interest in others and you may find that you relax and have a better time.
4) Practice deep breathing or mindfulness: Before you go, take some deep breaths and try to calm your nerves. During the night, take a moment to check in with yourself and focus on your breathing if you feel overwhelmed.
5) Allow yourself to have fun: Try to let go of self-judgment and allow yourself to have fun. Don’t be too hard on yourself if things don’t go exactly as planned.
6) See things correctly: it's easy to view males as competition and females as sex objects. But is that reality? No, in reality, everyone is a special and unique person, much like a work of art. Make it your passion to study and learn about works of art, rather than get caught up in whether or not they
Remember that everyone feels nervous in social situations at times, and it’s okay to take things at your own pace. Take small steps and be kind to yourself, and over time you may find that you become more comfortable in these types of situations.
Most Helpful Opinions
I would say avoid night clubs and strip clubs like the plague. Here are some of my experiences in night clubs or strip clubs:
- half the people there think I am a cop.
- Several girls will ask me if I sell drugs
- One girl thought I was a cop and asked me if I could remove some traffic violation on her driving record in exchange for some favors. She would not believe me when I said I am not a cop. She kept pestering me all night.
- one guy got pissed at me because I looked at his girlfriend.
- one guy asked me if I sell cocaine.
I have witnessed a fair number of people get manhandled by the bouncers and I have seen several fights break out and seen people get dragged away in cuffs.
The music is also loud and the smoke smells nasty. It is hard to have a conversation there with anyone. I would try some type of hobbies or sports clubs or perhaps take a class or two. My cousin met his wife through a cooking class.
good luck
Practice. The more you try to talk to someone and maybe start with girls you don't find that attractive (that way you might not be tooo nervous) and just keep practicing, until one day it's a little easier for you.
A nightclub is not always an easy place to meet people as they are so noisy.
What Girls & Guys Said
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5Opinion
Get over yourself and make it happen.
I did that, older than you. my goal was just to be comfortable in a place I wasn't comfortable.
simple answer is to go with no expectations. learn to be positive and engaging with whomever you talk to, well in advance of going... so that this is just another iteration of being your best self.
you can spend time in advance boosting your energy, thinking of things to talk about, humor, understand women better. watch videos.
I recommend you avoid my method of my twenties, which consisting of drinking the shyness away.
- u
It doesn’t work when you’re shy you’ll just have to stand there and watch others dance unless you make a move
Just put yourself out there and you will get over it in time.
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