Does dating apps culture make you feel more lonely?

[Anonymous]

I tried dating apps but I'm quite disappointed from the shallowness of people who stop texting after some days.
So I tried to go to meetup and every time I meet a guy, he texts me for some days and then he ghosts me.

Why?

[Effably]

So dating apps are a lot like fishing. You sit there, swiping or engaging for hours and maybe you find a catch or two. Most likely you don't and you go back home and tell them you actually caught a fish but had to let it back as it didn't look like something to eat.

Every now and again though, you do pull up a great catch. But its called that because it is rare.

However if you're getting to dates and meetups and that is where it ends, then that is what I would focus on. No point being upset with what seems to work.

[shades777]

The dating apps themselves are the problem, I feel the functionality and design.
Instead of swiping maybe have some filters and let you pick based on that.


I posted a question about what features people wanted to add or change on dating apps and nobody gave a good answer.


Goes to show people don't know what they want, you have to tell them.


here's some features they need but are to scared to add


- He pays or dutch or she pays
- Just here to get laid
- want a relationship but no sex
- want a relationship and sex
- want a friend with benefits
- want a friend without benefits
- want a free meal but no second date
- lets go dance
- who wants fresh air
- Not looking for a stepdaddy
- not looking to be a step daddy but will still smash
- looking for a sugardaddy but no sugar


you get the point lol

[WanderingLoveWizard]

It would be cool if there was an app that matched you with ONE person.
Almost kind of forcing you to talk to that person until one or both of you decides it's not want they want, then you move on to the next

[shades777]

That would be interesting, like you have to pick 50 things and whoever is the closest you have to go with.

[shades777]

There is a such thing as too many options 😂

[WanderingLoveWizard]

Exactly!

[JSmuve]

I've thought about what kind of dating app I'd design if I was competent enough to make one, and honestly, with the exception of distance, I'm not sure I'd add any filters. The problem with filters is that if there's too many, you run the risk of filtering out everyone. And the people you're left with might very well have filtered you out. So it very much limits engagement.

[lightbulb27]

will need more information as to what is going wrong.

ghosting is the modern rude way of saying not interested. why is another matter. this why it's better to get to know people.

I'm sorry for your pain, it's frustrating. you can talk about ettiquette up front with people and make them at ease in communicating so they feel more comfortable.

[Peter_Penetrator]

Growing up the only dating apps that were available were telephones, back when they were stupid, and singles groups where you, wait for it…………….. actually got to know someone face to face. Shocking isn’t it.


Some folks were willing to put ads out in the classifieds in what were known as the Personals.

[JSmuve]

I've been on and off dating apps for 13 years; tried almost all of them, and I just left feeling like no one actually wants to try to get to know anyone. It's just meant to give a dopamine hit when you match with someone or get a message, nothing more.

As for your particular situation, you're just not holding their attention and providing what they're looking for.

[Venymal]

I just don’t think it’s an effective way to form a relationship. You have to spend a fair amount of time with someone before you start to care about them. That doesn’t necessarily mean in-person time. It can be long conversations over the internet or phone, but text messaging is not going to build a personal connection with someone.

[DizzyAster2]

Or maybe go out and join a club where you can meet people with like interests.

You will naturally meet someone there, even as a friend whom might have a friend or relative you might like.

Try that.

[Anonymous]

Why? Simply because it's not worth it. Some guys who have given up only go for hookups. But they can't be bothered to text if it's taking too long.

[SirJohn42]

Do to that most of the dating apps are fake profiles. Hackers just trying to steal your money.
Mostly bots or just people who are shallow. Wanting only to hook up. Ghosting is real bad.

[lorenzomichael]

Never did that. You can hit on a girl confidently wherever you are if you have game.

[OddBeMe]

Japan is the most tightly packed country in the world and the loneliest. Anything causes lonlieness.

[Jltakk]

Yep due to constant ghosting.