My boyfriend called me by his ex girlfriend name? So they were together for 11 years, engaged, 3 kids together?

[Anonymous]

They broke up in December 2021 due to her cheating on him, so he left her straight away and moved home to his mother's. I met him November 2022, he told me about her, he says he hates her for what she done to him and his children. I noticed she always texts calls him, it's like she pretends she has something to say to him just to talk to him, she always asks him for favours (nothing to do with there kids,) when he drinks he talks about her saying how much he Hates her and he said he'd still be there if he didn't find out about the cheating. His ex was pregnant 3 months after he left her so she has another child for her partner (he passed away) I'm currently 5 months pregnant for my boyfriend. What happened was we were in his kitchen and he said "pass me my cigarettes please ****** HER NAME. I was like what? He was kinda laughing and smirking saying sorry, his daughter was standing there and she was like ohhhh you said mammys name. I just feel a bit ughhhhhh. Any advice x

[Anonymous]

While yes, being called his ex’s name would hurt, I think you should let it go. They were together for 11 years, and it’s to be expected that he might accidentally call you by her name, without even thinking about it. It’ll be habit. It could be worse though, he could’ve said it in the bedroom… 💀

[Asker]

I just feel like he was obviously thinking about her in that moment. He's never done it before. Thanks for your reply

[molonski2]

hahaha , yes hadn't thought of that , bedroom would not be good.

[Opinion Owner]

It was most likely subconscious, rather than him actually thinking about her in the moment that he said her name.

[peedy]

It could be a slip of the tongue people are creatures of habit ever heard the phrase "force of habit" you get so use to doing saying that you don't even think about it, its a double edge sword though help you by making you more efficient but can turn around and bite you in the ass, 11 years is a long to be saying one person name and in the heat and or stress of the moment a persons mind is going to resort back to what it knows the best, we are only human and things like this will always happen to all of use so dont put to much into it dont make a mountain out of an ant hill

[molonski2]

Firstly , I'd strongly advise DO NOT SMOKE ! No excuses in this day and age..

When you have 3 kids together , they were together a long time , its a slip of the tongue , its a familiar situation , he made a mistake , but lets be clear if I were you I'd be extremely pissed off , If I were advising him Id say stop using any first names.

Back to the smoking - you are pregnant , that means he is also - NO CIGARETTES , none at all.

[scooogy]

This is some kind of conditioning I'd say, dealing with her name in his words and maybe thoughts. I happened to mention a new love of mine, it's over since 2021, but I happened to mention her by my ex's name, just like things moved on to her and my new love recently. Long story, but after licking me off it was her still greeting me a year after I've actually avoided her. Talking of which, why wouldn't he either cut her off or mention you to her at least as much?

[KrakenAttackin]

Just a mistake. With three kids this bitch really has her claws in him. Give him a break.

[slatyb]

That's happens. It doesn't mean anything.