I'm anxious avoidant what should I do?

[Anonymous]

I'm anxious avoidant person and I have serious trust issues, and whenever I start questioning someone's loyalty, I tend to lean towards infidelity. In my previous relationships, I always found an excuse to do this because my partners weren't very trustworthy. But for the first time, I'm in a relationship with a really good guy, and so far, I haven't done anything wrong to him. However, even without a significant reason, I have doubts, and I'm genuinely a jealous person, but I've never shown it to him because I don't like this trait in myself either. Additionally, I'm afraid of these doubts growing and my past relationship issues repeating. What should I do?

Updates

+1 y

Up

Updates

+1 y

+1

Updates

+1 y

Upp

[provokeesmokee]

Get yourself into therapy. Individual and, if you feel up to it, couples.

Even if you have a great relationship, it can be helpful to have a third party there to help you field discussions you wouldn't ordinarily have.

Working on your own anxious avoidant tendencies and your insecurities will help you manage how they make you feel.

You can do this. You do need to put in the work and effort, and it will be scary, but you're fighting to keep your first trustworthy partnership going.

That's an admirable effort.

[Anonymous]

Are you going to therapy? That may help address some of these issues.

[Asker]

I can't afford to it right now. I'm planning to go as soon as I'm financially able for it

[Opinion Owner]

That’s good that you’re planning to go. The only other thing I can think of is sitting your new boyfriend down and having a heart to heart about this. Assure him that you are seeking help, and hopefully he’ll be patient and understanding.

[jimmy2]

I been that way life will fade it aways

[Asker]

How?