Did you ever change yourself for someone you liked?

Question

ChicoFromThe305 · Accepted Answer

Nope, if you look at the bigger picture you'll see it's pointless, where there's one lie, there's most likely others to follow and lying about things so someone can like you is no longer being yourself which at this point the two people would build a bond on lies and makes it all a waste of time, if someone doesn't like you for being yourself then it's best to not force compatibility with someone you aren't compatible with, let's use your example, it's unnecessary, if their anime is such a deal breaker then that itself should be a deal breaker to you, acceptance towards each other is an important step in building a relationship.

OlderAndWiser · Accepted Answer

I have never pretended to enjoy something that I don't for the purpose of wooing a woman. I have met women who inspired me to try to be the best man that I can possibly be, and some of my behaviors have slowly evolved as a result of that process.

Rei13 · Accepted Answer

Whenever I was in my teens and early twenties I did that, ended up liking some things I wouldn’t have otherwise. However I don’t think you should pretend to like something you don’t, people can tell when you’re pretending and it doesn’t help you in the long run. In the scenario of anime it is okay to say “I usually don’t like anime but I’m willing to give -insert series a chance- to see if I like it”, still putting in effort while being honest and if you end up disliking it most people have multiple interests that you’re able to bond over

IslaTheWitch · Accepted Answer

Not exactly your example, but for someone I love, I made an effort to go through the hell of being diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome and took all the needed therapy. The effect is great, but without this special person, I wouldn't do it. I did it for him, literally.

Kaneki05 · Answer

I mean if someone rejects you for not liking anime they are an idiot and that's coming from someone who loves anime of course.
Hmm, I am bold with my views so I wouldn't back away from saying what I think like that.

Though will say kinda yeah? But for different reason. Sometimes you have to meet each in the middle. I think there are somethings we may have to will ourselves to do to be with someone I guess. It's not changing your thoughts or views though it's more doing something for them.
A minor example would be she wants to go out tonight, you never want to go out any nights well at some point your been unreasonable because your denying what she wants all the time and getting what you want all the time.

NathanDavis · Answer

nope, not really...

I have changed myself, as in... improving myself and my life, my situation but I did that for myself... for others, I have adjusted some things about myself within a relationship, and even friendships... but no substantial or drastic changes just to accommodate others

and to elaborate on your elaboration... either with friends or girlfriends, I've always willing to try things, and explore some of the things that they are into, yes... I would never ever pretend to like or enjoy it if I do not... but I will sure give them a try and keep doing it I get into it as well, or somethings I will just try my best to hang out with them on something they enjoy, this just does not happen as often... haha

KostasKouvalis · Answer

Changing and pretending are two completely different things. I've definitely pretended. The only time I've really changed, was when I was crushing on a Mexican girl in uni, I got hella defensive any time someone would talk shit about Mexicans.

AmeerX · Answer

I don't think I would change but respect the differences. For religious views, I think it's the hardest and better not to pursue a relationship if it's suffocating because one of the other person will think the other is going to hell and try to "convert" the other person into a "believer" or gas light him

Matadorius · Answer

I tried but it didn't work. My ex was against me smoking and drinking alcohol, so even though I didn't agree with it, I quit for a while, but I started again because I didn't feel like it. She was saying that I was wasting money, and she wasn't wrong, but as I said, since I didn't quit of my own accord, after a while I inevitably started again. I am not against such changes, in fact I find them nice, but I think they shouldn't happen at the request or coercion of only one party. I think couples should not intervene too much in each other's lifestyles and accept them as they are.

glennos89 · Answer

Sadly I did. I dumped all my female friendships to make her feel she can thrust me but in the end she kept being the same extremely jealous girlfriend so I realised the problem was her and not me or my female friends. Never going to make that mistake again while I was completely loyal to her

Fabiloso · Answer

I only do things like that if it also makes me a better person or widens my horizon of experiences. Like I dont like a lot of anime but, I'd watch them with her and to have the references and inside jokes for us to bond with. But also if they happen to be more like religious or something I'd give that a whirl similarly. But only if it feels beneficial for us both and the relationship.

Friendlybro79 · Answer

Adapt a little yes change not really. Maybe that means change i don't know. Lol.

I guess it means yes. For ex say someone doesn't like the way I put the toilet paper back in the holder and they want the paper to be rolled a certain way. I would accommodate that and just deal lol. I don't mind adapting to others quirks and stuff like that. That's part of my personality so would I change yes but also that's the kind of person I am.

I am reading into this way too much lol

Luopio27 · Answer

hasn't everyone?
I mean girls and guys working out in the gymand eating healthy to stay in sexy shape?

Girls spend money and time with make up to look better in public to impress the ones they like.

Guys try to get rich to gey pretty girls.

All this because guys reject girls for not looking good enough and girls rejecting guys for not being confident, succesful, intelligent, and popular enough!

Sonorous · Answer

I'd be open to trying new things; exploring dislikes might reveal unexpected aspects and foster a newfound appreciation.

But I'm not the type to pretend. It would be too tiring to do so. I'd just rather be honest about what I do & don't like with them. And if it doesn't work out, then maybe it wasn't meant to.

Forceinhand · Answer

No, and no one ever should, unless you carry some aspect of your personality that needs to change of course. Such as jealousy, pettiness, obsession or the like. But you only do yourself a disservice by pretending to like something your really don't, compatibility with people doesn't change just because we act like we're better than we are for each other and only leads to poor relationships. Not to mention it's altogether weak behaviour to change who you are because you're infatuated.

DannyUk2017 · Answer

The "change" doesn't happen... we all still have "our" ways of doing things and thinking, all we do is we just "Mould"after the person we are with, or viceversa just to keep them "pleased", that's all.

Ms_Facesitter · Answer

No, because I want to find a good match. If he accepts me for who I am and I do the same for him, life will be much easier. I won't pretend to be something I'm not just to have him like me. He either likes me or he doesn't.

Tim2nice · Answer

Yes. I changed my accent. Or should I say I liked her accent and I could speak it.

strateguy632 · Answer

good example it is not really change, just participating. learning about their interests. if dont lie "i love anime too" then not fraud.

AydenHazor · Answer

I've definitely changed myself for others, and got into the habit of it. I tend to turn myself into whoever the person I'm with needs at the moment. A listening ear, a helper, an encourage, someone to get righteously angry for them, and much more. Basically this is a trauma response that has turned me into a bit of a doormat at times.

Anonymous · Answer

Everyone does that... or else, it was over someone we hated.

Most people reacted to the people closest to them to differentiate themselves. Their twin, their parents...

That's why if you want to be truly true to yourself you can't be too close to anyone, have many many friends. I have 20-25. Shooting to have 100.

Worst · Answer

Update: no, forcing yourself to like things that you don't enjoy could turn incredibly toxic

AaronKrieger · Answer

Sure, when I was teenager I would do that, but now I do not give a shit. No one needs to like everything that the person they're with or has a crush on. Sometimes those differences makes things interesting.

ChefPapiChulo · Answer

It depends what it is. Im not so sure about anime tho.

DryGermanGuy · Answer

„A leopard does not change its spots.“  - Proverb

colaman94 · Answer

No. I've learnt to just be myself and I am myself. There's no faking me at 29 to now 😛👌🏻

exitseven · Answer

yes, I was a lot worse before I met my wife. Believe it or not.

motownplayer2000 · Answer

Nah, waste of time and energy.. with we can compromise and agree that you can be together despite the differences, or go our separate ways.

Luckycharms12 · Answer

No I am who i am love or hate me don't care. I try be better person like everyone else not going change myself for some girls pussy. Be lying to myself and to her

DJB72 · Answer

I moved ten thousand miles from my home. Three times so far. (Same person)

genericname85 · Answer

yeah. it's dumb to do but i made that mistake xD

Anonymous · Answer

hahaha I tried but failed in some of the departments.

nawtee_me · Answer

Not at all, I can only be me…. Love me or hate me, I am just me….

Staximus · Answer

Not really, maybe I should change my attitude though. I'm very cantankerous

Sour-rose · Answer

Lol nooo. I was too dumb to impress others.

Anonymous · Answer

I think most people have at some point in their life.

Yellovv · Answer

Not really, I can't change myself for that, I like to be myself..

BrookeS · Answer

The most i changes was my haircut

Joker_ · Answer

sure if the manipulation requires it

dudeinohio · Answer

I never change. They need to like me as I am.

Z1pTD · Answer

Yes. Every single time lol

scooogy · Answer

Tried once, bad choice.

BLP11520 · Answer

Yes to a certain extent

Hispanic-Cool-Guy · Answer

No..

eagle1951 · Answer

yess

Slim57 · Answer

Nah I don't do that

HouseMoat · Answer

I have not

Did you ever change yourself for someone you liked?

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What is something that you have actively changed about yourself for someone you liked so that they would like you?

Did you ever change yourself for someone you liked?

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What is something that you have actively changed about yourself for someone you liked so that they would like you?

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