Why are coworkers so nosy such as me and this guy always usually talk but today I kinda tried staying away few coworkers was already asking whats Up?

[Anonymous]

Like what’s wrong with us bc we not talking, they where like you always would joke around with each other now you’re like distant or something so I told the guy coworker and he kept saying I’m not mad at you and started talking I personally try stayin away bc he is married so why should I initiate the conversation with him am I wrong or should I stay cool with him? And why does it concern the coworkers

[Oliverlogan263]

Ah man, coworkers can be nosy sometimes, always in your business.

I get why you wanna stay away from that married dude, that's smart. But now your other coworkers are all up in your grill wonderin' what's up. Annoying!

Next time they say somethin', just play it cool. Be like "it's all good, just focusing on my work is all." Or change the subject to some sports or new show you watched.

As for the married dude, keep it light and casual when you gotta talk shop. But don't go outta your way to hang with just him, ya feel me? Not worth the problems it could cause.

If the coworkers don't let up, maybe confide in just one you trust. Say you're not trying to cause drama. Most people will back off if they know the deal.

Don't stress too much luv, they'll find someone else to gossip about soon enough. Just do your thing and they'll forget about it. Ain't no biggie!

[Asker]

Yes and he kept saying I’m not mad at you every time he was passing me by so I was like I’m not mad either but why he felt like he had to say he ain’t mad

[Oliverlogan263]

Ah man, that is kinda weird that he keeps saying he's not mad. Like why would he think you're mad? Maybe he's feeling awkward cuz you guys aren't chatting like normal so he's overcompensating. Or he could be worried you're actually mad at him for some reason and trying too hard to show he's not. Either way it's coming off kinda suspicious! Honestly just do your own thing and don't stress about it too much. You weren't doing anything wrong by taking a step back. If he brings it up again just be like "no worries" and change the subject. The coworkers will find something else to gossip about soon enough. Not worth losing sleep over some weird married dude at work, ya know? Just stay cool.

[Asker]

Well I have been pushing him a bit away lately bc he is a married guy and we have been joking a lot but I’ve noticed it’s been going to far like the stuff he be commenting on but maybe I should have not said anything about his friends noticing bc after I told him I was surprised he came up to us yesterday bc I was with two other coworkers and he was talking with us especially me maybe like 25 min and he said good morning to me so I don't know what’s going on here

[Oliverlogan263]

Aye, sounds like this dude is definitely feeling some type of way with all the mixed signals now. I can see why you've been pulling back too - jokes are one thing but he was pushing boundaries commenting on your stuff.

Fact is, he's married... so it don't matter how much he's tryna chat you up at work. Nothing good can come from getting too close to that. You gotta look out for yourself first.

I wouldn't read too deep into him talking your ear off yesterday. He's probably confused cause you put some space between y'all and now he's tryna feel things out.

My advice? Politely but firmly keep things professional. Don't give him false hope by flirting back or letting convos get personal. Shut that down quick if it comes up again.

Dude needs to respect you AND his wife. Ain't no shame in protecting your energy, you know? Don't stress over what he's thinking - you do you and that's that on that.

Hang in there luv. You seem like you got a good head on your shoulders to know what's best for you.

[Asker]

You think he knows what he done and doing is wrong or he not sure what’s going on between us or he probably realizes

[Asker]

I don’t know why it concerns people too but after he heard that someone said we don’t talk like that anymore those past days for sum reason he came over yesterday I believe for that main reason and talked I don't know why he cared and than I was standing earlier yesterday he comes up I was kinda resting my head and says are you crying don’t worry everything will be okay I’m like I’m not crying. l can’t you see why?

[Oliverlogan263]

Man, who knows what's really going on in that dude's head. He might realize on some level that getting too close with a coworker, especially since he's married, isn't smart. But some guys can be pretty clueless too. Him coming up to you right after hearing someone said you guys weren't talking as much does make it seem like he cares more about what people think than he should. And asking if you're crying and saying "everything will be okay" is weird, like he's trying too hard to prove something. I'd say at this point just try to interact with him as little as possible outside of work stuff. Give short answers and find excuses to walk away if he tries to start long convos. He should take the hint that you're putting space between you guys. Don't overthink his motives - focus on protecting yourself and staying out of any possible drama situations. Just do your job and that's it.

[Asker]

Sounds like he was trying to cheat on his wife with me eventually and realized nothing is coming out of this who knows

[ThrillSeeker01]

I would just drop it and forget about him.

[Asker]

Drop what? Why you say it like that