What does it mean when a girl says one of her favorite qualities in a guy is "ambition"?

Question

It is another way of saying "I'm attracted to social status and want a successful man eventually if he is not already successful." Agree or Disagree?

MrOracle · Accepted Answer

On one hand, I think it would be foolish for a woman to commit to a relationship with a man who has no ambition. Men need to be useful - we're built for that.

On the other hand, there's definitely a percentage of women who use this word as a more politically correct way to say that they are only interested in men who they predict to have very high levels of financial success. Such women are only in it for his money, and will leave him if he doesn't achieve the desired level of success quickly enough.

Obviously that isn't all women, but it's a large enough group that it has to be mentioned.

DextroShade · Accepted Answer

This is just womanese for "I want a guy who has or will soon have money but I don't want to sound like a gold-digging whore so I will make it sound like something more noble"

XHopelessRomanticX · Answer

Ambition is a quality I admire in a man, and I never really associated it with money. To me, an ambitious man is someone who makes plans and works to accomplish them. It’s the difference between the guy who is all talk sitting on his butt, and the guy who is actually getting up in the morning to go move mountains.

A noble man makes noble plans and on noble deeds he stands.

Miristheiss · Answer

Agree. Basically, I want a man to live up to his gender role. He has to make money. He has to be successful, have a purpose, be the leader. I can get pregnant and he will look after us and take care of us.

Women, on the other hand, should not be expected to have any role. She can spend her most fertile years out clubbing, getting drunk, not saving themselves for marriage and ruining her ability to bond with a husband by letting tons of men warp her sexually by trying out all of their pornography influenced kinks on her, giving her tons of emotional baggage they go to school and party for 4 years get a job and make THEIR OWN money which is just for her and then they still want the guy to take on all of the provider role.

Ambition is code for money and provision... a traditional male gender role. A woman staying virtuous and child free for her future husband? Oh, that is antiquated, gender roles are outdated... except the ones for men.

Men like non promiscuous women for wives. That is sexist, how dare you.

Women like tall, successful men who are good providers. Well, of course. why of course women have traditional gender role expectations of men. Nothing wrong with that at all.

Roles for women? How dare you!!! Women can get tattooed, sleep around, go out drunk, wear slutty clothing, post tons of racy pictures online and let tons of men DM her daily. Any word said against this. HOW DARE YOU TRY AND CONTROL. You toxic man!!! Now, go spend years studying, building your career, making money, getting experience so you can pay for all the dates and pay my bills and take care of me. Open doors, be romantic, be charming, be a gentlemen but not too boring, you've got to excite me and be mysterious and make my feelings tingle daily, take on the responsibility to pay me alimony and child support if things go south.

What? You don't want me dressing like a hooker and partying with my sleazy friends drunk until 2am while 50 guys talk to me all night and flirt with me? You don't control me you toxic man!!! This isn't the 1950's, I'm not your slave! Now, get back to living up to your male gender role. Pay for all my shit and kiss my ass and serve me while I get back to texting this guy in my DMs.

NathanDavis · Answer

I think you're confusing words here...

I think you are thinking of financial success, wealth, financial status and and you call that ambition...

but not, ambition does exist by itself as a concept... and it is first and foremost about the determination someone has and the dedicated work and effort they put in many or any goals they pursue and want to achieve

it is about the drive of a person that wants to succeed yes, but it doesn't have to be all about money... what you suggest in your question has to do more with greed and insecurities both

I do have ambition in my life, I have my goals... but they're not about accumulating wealth, in fact... what I've seek and got done, is to give myself the flexibility to do a couple of things I love to do without making it about the money, I don't do it for the profit but for the passion I have for it and the way it is fulfilling to me too, as well as others...

also true that... most women would not want a guy that lacks ambition, as in... doesn't have determination no goals of any kind...

ShadezMcgee · Answer

I asked a question a few months back about something similar regarding women desiring men who want to conquer the world. Same principles apply here.

Ambition is right up there with confidence for men as the most attractive trait that women find in a man. Ambition is used as the projection one has to achieve something in life be it goals or passions they have for something. If you have little of it or none, what that spells is a lack of drive, quality and ability to do something with yourself in the world. So if a man who has little to no ambition goes against a man who has high ambitions and goals is pitted against each other, who will be the likelier one to succeed and achieve something? Obviously the latter.

Women don't want to settle for a loser or someone that is lazy, so they go after men who have a passion for something or many high goals they are on the path to achieve because it shows discipline, dedication, and purpose in their lives. Now what WOMEN deem as good ambition in the men they seek is a different story.

Some see ambition as men in high positions of power and still striving to climb higher, finances and social power. Others are happy you have a job and maybe do wood cutting as a hobby and make furniture. It isn't the same across the board.

veganrogue · Answer

I think for the same reason I search for ambition in a woman. I want a woman who's passionate about something in her life. Something that consumes her, something that makes her leap from her bed each morning to build or create something new and exciting, because I'm the same way. I have a lot of dreams, and the only way to make those dreams come true is to have a plan and take action.

Yes the word ambition can be a guise for other intentions, but if she really is ambitious I want to go on that journey with her.

IslaTheWitch · Answer

For me,  healthy ambition  is a quality that shows this person is actively pursuing their goals or dreams. And I value it a lot. As long as they are not focused ONLY on that :D But I don't combine it with success or social status (whatever it is or means)

AlphaMale1 · Answer

I have lived through both sides of this. My first wife was a gold digger. I dated a woman years later that she really love me and was a nympho with me when it came to sex. She told me she was my slut. It took me six or eight years later to realize how true that statement was. I should have married and stayed with her. We never married.
My second wife was no different than the first other than her tequinice. Both wives knew I was good for generating money for their desires. Both are now living alone.

Kaneki05 · Answer

it could mean that but it could also just mean they like someone who's passionate about their goals and has well ya know ambition.
Like the wife to Marx, he was poor all his life and she stood beside him not for any money gains but cause she admired his ambition when it came to his views on trying to make work conditions better in labour forces. In fact she even left a wealthy life for him.

So it has two vastly different meanings. I find the respectable one is Marx wife's response not just I want a wealthy guy.

antelope51 · Answer

I don't need social status, but I do need action over apathy. I don't want to have to babysit and take care of a man. I want him to be able to get his own dinner, do his own laundry, and fix stuff when it bothers him, not wait for me to do it. And I also don't want someone who just sits in front of the t. v. I want someone who has interests and takes action to follow those interests.

wolfcat87 · Answer

Ha ha ha, it means that no one wants a partner who sits around like a lump on a log and does not contribute or progress in life. Men and women prefer partners with ambition, goals, and a desire to go somewhere in life. Who wants a person who shows no personal growth over decades?

RingOfFire · Answer

Another question that can be answered by nature and evolution.

Survival of the human species relies on a strong family unit.

A strong family unit consists of a mother, a father and children.

Each have a role in ensuring the success of the family.

A father's role is to provide for and protect the mother and the children.

Therefore, women's DNA is programmed by millions of years of natural evolution to look for a man who has traits of being a good provider and to value and be attracted to it in a potential mate.

"Ambition" is one of the visible traits that increases the likelihood that a man will be that successful provider she is looking for.

Veronica-026 · Answer

Seriously though, if you can chose between a "successful man" and a "not successful man", who in their right mind would ever, ever consider the second?

"Yeah I like my guys with low self esteem, no confidence in their abilities, without ambitions, goals and dreams."
Said noone, ever.

ChiTown33 · Answer

It's generally code for "I like money so you better have some".😂

I only say this because there are so few quality men and women on online dating apps. And this is the type of place where you'd read something like this. Quality men are ALREADY ambitious. If you need to tell a man you want him to be ambitious you're already beating a dead horse.

1073sucks · Answer

well if you have ambitions it means you are not satisfied with just staying where you are and will always want to upgrade, who doesn't want that? wether they make it or not, just seeing people trying is attractive compared to someone who does nothing at all, just satisfied with minimum wage Job with no further aspirations.. it's very unsexy not to call that gold digging mind, simply by nature even an animal would opt for the hard working one rather than one that does not try. Imagine saying you want to find someone that doesn't want to be better... for the sake of not being labeled a gold digger? Ridiculous really.

AMS700CX4u2 · Answer

Goes back to prehistory, and pecking order. All women wanted to walk with the chief because it meant her children had a better chance of survival. It is not unreasonable. Pregnancy takes a lot out of a women and a stillbirth or a death of a child is a heavy burden psychologically and physically. But it all comes with a cost. If the chief is making all the decisions and the tribe suffers because of a bad decision, the blame goes to the chief. So there is more stress at the top. ...

It means something different currently. I have to give credence to MrO's MHO It really depends whether you love him or the money. Interesting, when Men have an "Out of Body" experience. Sometimes we come back with different priorities. What is important to us changes. There is a very high divorce rate when the Country Club membership is meaningless to us but still important her.

AmyHew1tt · Answer

Abition for me, is having goals. But they should be realistic goals. Not 'I'm going to become the president of the US, or become the CEO of the company I intern at.' Drive is attractive. Even if he's not there yet, if he has a point of focus, something he's going to work towards dedicatedly, that's what I want.

mobiusforniner · Answer

No. Ambition refers to a MAN, who knows what he wants from his life and has a vision of getting there. This generally correlates to someone who is financially and/ or socially successful. Women find such men attractive because they are more likely to have an idea of what a stable and happy family life is supposed to be like

sitting on one’s ass and simultaneously complaining about the unfairness of life demonstrates NO ambition and generally correlates to less success financially and/or socially. Women find such boys less attractive because they are unlikely to have a vision of what they want or know what it means to lead or guide a family. They are also more prone to blaming others or blaming the social-political atmosphere for their ineptitude, which shows lacking accountability and further erodes his chances of being a valuable contributor to society, much less a suitable partner

Ms_Facesitter · Answer

I just want a man who wants to be a good man, a good husband, an inspiration. So we can grow together.

TheSpaceGnome · Answer

As a guy who is attracted to ambition in women, I have to disagree.

If a woman isn't ambitious, she won't want to co-head a home business with me, she won't be an artist, she won't have grand aspirations nor an inventive mind, and if thats the case, I don't want her, because she's boring.

I could see a woman coming to the same conclusion about a man.

Joshydavid25 · Answer

It definitely can mean that, and more than likely does a lot of times, whenever a woman says that.. But, it can also mean that he is passionate about something.. Some that drives him.. A purpose.. Women love a man that seems like he has a purpose.. Or are "on their purpose".. Not lazy, and unfocused..

SereneScribe3 · Answer

It doesn't necessarily mean they want a rich guy. Money is not sexually attractive in my opinion. Ambition is. Doing what you love and having pride in it. Depends on their passion. If it's cars, hunting or stocks/investing no thank you. Philosophy? Poetry? Arts? Gardening? Yes please! But the biggest turn-on is kindness. Emotional maturity. Being gentle and caring.

HighValue · Answer

It usually means that she prioritizes and values money above all else. She will likely leave him if they have financial hardship in the future.

Thestupidusername · Answer

No. Women would rather be with a hardworking broke man who has a plan. Gets up every morning go to the gym. Head to work and plan for his investments or company etc.

Than a guy sitting at home all day lazy getting money from his rich dad.

So its more the charachter behind it. At least for most women.:)

SeymourBill420 · Answer

I chose no disagree because ambition doesn't always mean money and job and worthless shit. It could actually mean sex. She's looking for a guy that's ambitious and makes the first moves in the bed because she's too lazy to make the first moves to the bedroom. That's more so what I think it is because most women are pretty lazy in that category

Reem12345reem · Answer

for me , personally , when i say that I like ambition , it means that even if he wasn't successful yet , or failed multiple times , he still has the ambition to continue doing what he wants to accomplish, it's the act of ambition and not the status of what ambition can get you to (i hope i explained this right )

lightbulb27 · Answer

I'm not positive. I really think she means she wants someone with drive and success, which equates to money... the root of that being security. However, in some circles if they are religious, it's meaning and purpose... they want to do something meaningful with their lives and impact others. I've seen both although I'd say both were highly successful anyway.

I'd be curious of womens answers.

smne35 · Answer

It's saying that she don't want to be with a no good lazy bum, who does, it's saying that she wants a better life for herself and her kids, it's saying she don't react to live paycheck to paycheck but live life on their terms, it has nothing to do with her being a gold digger or shallow, and I don't fault any woman making that statement,

HighlyQuestionable · Answer

I don't know. But I think we need a movement of women not being interested in social status.

Anonymous · Answer

Theh mean they want you to not be like them. 90% of women have given up on life before they turn 18. That's probably because it makes them more willing to be happy having kids. Hence women who just give up on their own ambitions reproduced more often. It was the 10% of women who had ambitions that have changed society and practically forced the majority of women to pretend like they care about bigger life issues than having kids. A man without ambitions isn't a man. We call it mankind and not woman kind because it is men who have typically dared to live life to the fullest.

sheikalana · Answer

That could be one of the reasons but it could also mean she’s attracted to someone who’s hard working and career oriented not necessarily a millionaire.

Friendlybro79 · Answer

Neither agree or disagree because if someone says ambitious you could also take them for their word and go by the actual definition of the word instead of reading between lines that aren't necessarily there. The other side of not knowing what a woman would mean, if they didn't mean it literally, is the fact that not all women think the same way.

molonski2 · Answer

I think that is pretty much exactly what she is saying , her wish is Status.

Texaskid1 · Answer

Women are wired to seek men for their resources. She wants an ambitious man because she wants access to his resources and thus improving her and her offspring's chances of survival.

Anonymous · Answer

DUHH!! 😆😆😆 How tf are you gonna feed your child? How are you gonna pay for her food when she’s pregnant and disabled? With your Walmart Pay?  Stop Playing! 😆😆😆

Simslover92 · Answer

Ambition could just mean he has goals in life. He wants to do something with himself. Not necessarily he has to have lots of money. I just want my guy to have plans for himself to be a better version of himself like I do.

Filthy_Immigrant · Answer

I means she's a fucking gold digger and wants a man that is willing to chase money all the way to hell if it means he'll get rich

normalice · Answer

Ambition is to women what boobs are to men. It is an instinctive code that says "this person will be able to take care of our babies."

Truthatanycost · Answer

It doesn't matter. Ignore what she says and just watch what she does. You may see women claiming they desire ambitious men... then you see them out with the local sloth...

Fireguy17 · Answer

it can be that he isn't doing video games 12 to 18 hours a day, not watching sports for ten hours a day on weekends, where he actually gets out and does something constructive around the house, or gets out and about and does things.

msc545 · Answer

She is attracted to money she doesn't have to work for.

Belgie · Answer

What she wants is not to be with a guy who idles or plays video games excessively or refuses to try and better his situation.

robhazelnut · Answer

I don't know. My mind's first thought is they want a fire-hose blasting currency bills at their mouth full-force.

musclesimp · Answer

Just some unnecessary big words, it's like saying "for a climactic coitus you need to have a seriously sizable phallic protrusion," instead of simple "she needs a big cоck."

SotiCoto · Answer

It means she is lazy and wants to be taken care of so she doesn't have to take responsibility for herself. That tends to be the trend for anyone who favours "ambition".

LeeTina · Answer

It depends on how much success the man can achieve based on his own qualities and connections.

strateguy632 · Answer

close, but a "man with a plan" not some "dead end dead beat" that does not think about next year

deus_ex_sisyphus · Answer

Interesting perspective, I always thought ladies wanted men with ambition, so that they could show them a new world. Aka a way to weed out the NEET suitors that just sit at home all day on G@G or video games lmao

KrakenAttackin · Answer

It means she wants a guy who is and will continue to make $$$$$$.

RavVid · Answer

It isn't just money. Homo Erectus girl wanted the boss Homo Erectus man long before money existed.

Paris13 · Answer

He Has Something Going for Himself. A Job, Goals. etc. xxoo

loveslongnails · Answer

ambition: a strong wish or desire to do or to achieve something, typically requiring determination and hard work: It's the "something" that determines what she means.

andreasderjuengere · Answer

My own ambition is to serve her well in and around the ''bedroom''. I can very much agree to this girl :)

LiamJHayden · Answer

It might be that. Or it might be that she has dated some lazy freeloaders and to her ambition is a willingness to work.

OddBeMe · Answer

It’s a good thing. It doesn’t mean money. It means drive. We don’t want to invest in relationships with lazy assholes…my wife keeps saying to me.

goaded · Answer

It means you shouldn't spend all day playing games and not working.

Dargil · Answer

Desire to achieve is an admirable characteristic. I wish I had more.

RedInnocent68 · Answer

Sort of. Or go-getter who’s working at improving themself somehow.

Likes2drive · Answer

She wants to go-getter that will probably be successful and make more money

boobliker · Answer

she want a man with drive to get what he wants

Nice222 · Answer

She wants a guy who know what he wants and is going to keep trying until he is successful in getting it.

What does it mean when a girl says one of her favorite qualities in a guy is "ambition"?

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