What would you prefer?

Question

I'm 19 (female). There's this guy I'm really interested in, but I'm not ready for sex yet. I feel like that's his only intention because why would he want to hang out at my house on our first hangout. Would it be mean to be upfront and say, "I'm not ready or willing to have sex anytime soon?" I'm not waiting for marriage, but I definitely want to wait until I'm in a committed relationship. How would I go about saying that? Should I keep it to myself and wait to she what his intentions are?

Oliverlogan263 · Accepted Answer

Honestly I think you should just be upfront about it from the start. Better to get everything out in the open so you're both on the same page.

Let him know you really like him, but sex is something you want to wait for until you feel really comfortable in a relationship. That way there's no misunderstanding later on.

Definitely don't put yourself in a situation alone at your place if you're not ready. That's asking for trouble. Better to hang out somewhere public the first time so you can really get to know each other first.

If he's a cool dude he'll understand and not pressure you. You don't want some dude who's just after one thing anyway. Be confident in what you want - any real man will respect your boundaries.

My advice would be just lay it all out straight up so you can see how he reacts. If he gets all weird about waiting, then you dodged a bullet! But hopefully he likes you for you and is willing to go slow. Good luck! Let me know how it goes.

hahahmm · Accepted Answer

Let me use a car analogy here... the typical guy is like a sports car. He can become more of a slow but powerful truck when he's with the right driver (woman). But he never starts out like that. You're going expecting to get the truck on day 1. It's not going to happen if you're wearing the sports driver outfit and hanging out at the sports car dealership. You're trying to have one thing but in the wrong place/doing the wrong thing. This is as simple an explanation as I can make it.

Check out my mytakes on "characteristics of a lady", "being a better man", "trust" and "loyalty" if you want to hear my ideas on what makes for ideal relationship/partners. Not that you even said that's what you want but maybe you are thinking about what you want.

HotManPlayboy · Answer

I think you should suggest meeting outside first. For example, strive for this. Make a plan and say let's do this and that. I have a plan like this. What do you say? If you looked that it does not fit and just. He wants to be together for sex. Probably because it will be your first experience. You will not be happy You will be sad