I went out on a breakfast date with a guy co worker. He’s a gentleman, he’s sweet and nice looking. He’s very touchy, but not In a disrespectful way. He likes to hold hands, hold my waist, give hugs, caress my face etc the only thing is, even though we genuinely connect and have good conversation, I’m just not into it. Not because I’m not attracted to him because I am but because of my last situation. I’ve started the healing process but it’s only been a year and I was with the guy for four years and had a son by him. It has nothing to do with him but more so to do with me needing to heal parts of me that makes me reject giving dating, love, intimacy and relationships a try again. When he touched me I don’t get an icky “Ewww don’t touch me.” Kind of feeling but more of a “Yea, this is too much, I’m not ready.” Kind of feeling and he’s sweet and seems to genuinely like me but I have to be real with myself before anything.
11 d
Would this mean I lead him on?
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I feel you. I think you’re just scared of falling in love again because you think he’ll hurt you. I also think you have a mentality that your baby daddy will come back and solve things. If you really want to start dating, get rid of the negative thoughts and relax a bit. If you are not ready to date again, don’t go on dates. Forget about the past and move on. You deserve to be happy again
Have you told him that you aren’t in a position where you are ready to date? If you weren’t honest about this beforehand before agreeing to the date, yeah you kind of did lead him on, especially allowing him to hold hands and do all of the other things.
however he definitely should not have been touchy feely with you.
Yes, I actually told him first which prompted me to come on here and ask if I lead him on or not. You know, I allowed him to hold my hand, hug me etc I stopped him when he said he wanted to kiss me. This was all on the first date. We saw each other again for the first time at work since the date and he kept texting and asking me to come and meet him in places in the work place where people couldn’t see us just for him to do the same things. Hold hands, hug etc and that’s when I knew I had to say something before I started playing with fire. My heart isn’t where in needs to be to be able to fully accept that intimacy he was bringing, he seems to know what he wants and I don’t.
Than his a douche for not respecting your wishes
No, I don't think you led him on, and he sounds kinda desperate anyway.