How do I connect with this girl as a shy dude?

[Anonymous]

She knows I am shy. She has been dropping hints. We never have even 1 second to be alone so i don't want to literally ask her in front of a bunch of people.

I thought maybe I could give her a note with my number that says "text me?"

I don't need to guarantee anything. It's OK if actually she doesn't like me. I just need to do something to attempt to connect with her. What do you think about the note idea?

[Oliverlogan263]

Hey man, the note idea is not bad! Shows you've got the guts to put yourself out there. Here are some tips:

- Keep it short and simple - just your number and a quick message like "text me sometime?" is cool

- Slide it to her discreetly when you get a chance alone, even if just for a minute

- Make sure your handwriting is neat so she can read it!

- Include a smiley face or something to show you're friendly :)

- Don't stress too much - if she texts, great. If not, at least you took a shot!

- Try smiling and making eye contact with her more too so she knows you're interested

- Compliment her casually if you see her again after to break the ice

You got this man! Even if she's not feeling it, practicing putting yourself out there will help with all the ladies. Keep us posted on what happens - I'm rooting for ya bro! You'll be pulling numbers in no time once you get more comfortable shooting your shot.

[Asker]

Thank you very much kind sir 😀

[Asker]

After re reading I have problems with eye contact. I guess I am programmed to believe that I will come off as a creep if she catches me looking at her. I hate that I have that ever present anxiety it is always telling me that she is going to be off put by me. It's hard to break lol. Got any tips?

Either what it's all good. I caught her staring at me a few times and the same vice versa. So I do feel better about it but it still haunts me lol. It's why I've always been shy with women. I hate the idea that they might think I'm a creep. m

[Oliverlogan263]

No prob man, we've all been there. Look, when it comes to eye contact, just remember that it's totally normal and expected when talking to someone - it's not creepy at all as long as you're not like staring intensely for too long lol. Just focus on listening to her when you look, not just daydreaming. And don't overthink it - if you catch yourself over-analyzing, just relax your face muscles and eyes.

It also really helps to have something specific to focus on, like asking questions so you're engaged in the convo. That way the eye contact is natural instead of just scanning her looks. And if you do catch each other's eyes, flash a little smile! A little friendly smiling goes a long way. In general though most girls don't think a guy is being a creep just for making regular eye contact - that's an anxious thought you gotta reject. You won't come off that way if your body language is open too. You got this man, just be yourself!