Why he didn't reply my text?

[Anonymous]

We were about to have date, but he was only texting me during nights. Im pretty sure a guy always texts gm messages or calls during day if he's really into. So i unfollowed him everywhere and didn't make any explanation. He called, texted, i didn't reply. After i said im not that girl who he gonna text when he can't find someone to talk at the night.. i said I enjoy life too much and there is no space to deal with an inconsistent man. He didn't reply me back 🤣😭

[Anonymous]

I wish you’d communicated how you were feeling in a better way. Basically what you would’ve preferred was for him to text you during the day and send good morning texts, that’s a fair boundary. But to communicate that the way you did: deleting him off everything, ignoring his calls/texts then throwing an accusation at him once you finally did respond, was just very immature and avoidant in nature.


There was no good incentive for him to respond. You were new to one another (at least that’s how it sounds) so it’s not like there was a relationship for him to fight for. Then for you to accuse him rather than just be like ‘how come you don’t check in during the day?’, as if you can’t text him as well, is just wild. You seem to wanna be chased, and not every man is interested in doing so.

[Asker]

Im not gonna teach a man how to behave to me, if a man is into you, he gonna text you 24/7. If not, he's not into

[Asker]

Im not gonna ask a man why he doesn't text me during day, because he knows he's not texting me during day because he doesn't want. If he wanted he would. So im gonna delete him off

[Opinion Owner]

Not every man is big on texting at that capacity. I know my fiancé wasn’t, up until we lived together he preferred in person interactions and we really just checking in through the day a couple times. The whole “24/7” thing you have in your head just isn’t realistic, people have jobs, commitments, and things to do outside of being glued to their phones. On top of that, communicating that something bothers you or asking questions is not ‘teaching a man how to behave’. Your perspective on what men should or shouldn’t do when they’re interested is pretty much you being lazy and expecting them to chase you, which will keep you single at this rate. No offense with what I’m saying, just being honest. You don’t have to agree but I don’t want this conversation to veer of into you becoming disrespectful and mean. There is no need.

[Asker]

Ofc People have jobs but it can't be the reason why he doesn't send me gm text or text me during day to ask wyd. Its only 5 mins to ask someone wyd. If he doesn't even do that im not gonna spend my whole day to meet him

[Asker]

Im a doctor and if i can find time to talk my crush during work, he can actually do he's not as busy as me

[Opinion Owner]

Are you sending good morning texts and checking in through the day? Then I think your point would be fair, you find time to text him so he can do the same. But if you aren’t doing that either then again, it’s like you’re wanting to be chased. With my fiancé, whoever woke up first would send the good morning text and usually it was him. Same goes for at night, whoever went to bed first sent the goodnight. I think that is more fair then it all being on one person.

[Asker]

I did and he didn't do it. by the way he was the one who wanted to meet me and asked me out, so why im gonna chase him? Is he gay, why im gonna do men job during relationship? by the way his reason was just so dumb that he doesn't text me because he wants to know me better? aren't you gonna text more to someone why you try to get to know better lol

[Opinion Owner]

Okay, then like I said, if you were doing your part then it’s fair to expect he’d do the same. Still, I believe you went about addressing this the wrong way. You accused him of only texting you at night when he can’t find another woman, and to me that’s unfair because already it seems like your problem is making time/prioritizing your conversations and not other women. You don’t know that there’s other women, and punished him as if there definitely were. Respectfully I wouldn’t have responded to that either if I were him. You are too new to one another to fight for your connection, and I personally will not explain myself over something I didn’t do.

[Asker]

Lol i never wanted him to explain why he's not texting me during day, so i unfollowed him because its not what i want in my dating life lol

[Opinion Owner]

As for not wanting to text to get to know you better, I think he means getting to know you in person. Before my fiancé I was used to carrying on conversations with men through texts all day, so for him to be how he was and not really chat through the day was weird and new for me. But he was actually the one who ended up being most consistent and committed. It never worked out with those guys I texted all day, we actually would run out of topics at some point or not have the same connection in person that we did texting.

[Opinion Owner]

If you never wanted him to explain then why are you here seeking an explanation? If you really didn’t care then it wouldn’t matter that he didn’t respond.

[Asker]

It still can't be the reason why he's not texting me and asking me what u doin during the whole day in 24 hours

[Asker]

I dont seek explanation i just asked my situation :dd

[Opinion Owner]

Honey, when you ask why someone did something, that is seeking an explanation. You wanted to know why he didn’t respond, and I’m telling you that the way you handled the situation is why he isn’t responding.

You were hearing from him every day within 24 hours, just not when you felt it’s appropriate for him to be texting.

[Crimsyjo]

You told him your stance. He respected it. End of. Why was he going to fight it when you were extremely clear?

Whether your reasoning was right or wrong... I guess you won't know. But you should probably trust your gut. And even if he was innocent of any wrongdoing you were obviously a mismatch on communication style.

Try not to fret and move on.

[ProbablyClueless]

You're asking why he didn't reply, but I can tell you from a man's perspective that I can't figure out why he would.

Don't assume that a man will text you 24/7 if he's into you; that's not a realistic, correct, or even a reasonable assumption to make of any adult human being. A man you'd want anything to do with will have too much going on to text you all the time.

Further, the way you "communicated" your feelings on the matter totally destroyed any incentive or desire he would have had to contact you.

[Asker]

Texting during day and askin wyd is not something like "he must text 24/7". He only texts while im ready to sleep, not evening, not during day, or not morning. If a man is really into at least he texts good morning or asks what u doin during day. He's not gonna wait to text until the midnight. Its not something like can be solved with communication, if a man wants he does

[ProbablyClueless]

Nah... That is exactly the kind of problem you resolve with communication.

If you don't express what you want from someone, it's not reasonable to expect that they'll know to give it. I don't text people unless I have something to say. Especially if I DO like them. For me, the less texting, the better, because it lowers the chance of miscommunication and we have more to talk about in person.

I have enough going on throughout my day that I don't even think about texting women for social/fun purposes until the evening. If you didn't directly tell me that you like GM texts and such, I wouldn't ever even think to send them.

[Asker]

I did, he didn't text me the next morning :d

[ProbablyClueless]

Sounds like you two just weren't on the same wavelength.

[Asker]

Nope he's just looking for a placeholder lol

[ProbablyClueless]

I can only speak for myself, but I know that quality of communication is more important to me than frequency. Particularly if I'm only just beginning to get to know you. I might only talk with you 3 or 4 times in a week and I might be slow to respond, but I'll be having a very intentional conversation with you.

[Asker]

If a guy texts me and disappears for 3-4 days, it probably gonna be the last time he has conversation with me lol

[ProbablyClueless]

I hear that! It's just important to remember that that phone works both ways. You have to make an effort to reach out too. That kind of thing is why I try to be intentional in my communications. I might set up a date with you, or tell you if I'll be swamped with work for a day or two. Or, I might simply take time to really check in with you.

[CuriousHubby]

Cause he knew the game was over! Just wanted a night girl to hide from his girlfriend or wife and you did not want to do he ignored it.

[Asker]

This is actually how i think so

[CuriousHubby]

Sorry but right! So weird how you were just one time of day girlfriend!

Like he just wanted company on night shift

[Asker]

So he gonna choose a pickme girl who even doesn't care about that situation and all she wants is just to be with him lol but im not her

[CuriousHubby]

Good don't be just be yourself and make sure the guy chooses you!

[itsannalee]

Maybe he is busy during the day?
Like working or run a business.


Or do you like just date a unemployed man who have 24h/7 free time?

[Asker]

He just works 3 hours lol he has more Free time than me

[itsannalee]

Oh, maybe just nit into u.
Then move on.

[itsannalee]

#not

[Asker]

I think so lol thats what i actually did

[noohair]

You are making assumptions based on what? You never met this guy and you know what he is about and why he does things? Men decide if a relstionship where 80% is positive is worth the 20% bullsh! t that comes withit. Your 20% was too much for him.

[Asker]

It can never be called as b*llshit to want a guy to text or call during day and if not, let go. He was not just so much into. Im not gonna teach a man how to treat to me, because when a man wants, he does

[noohair]

So it is your opiniom that guys have time to text during the day. Maybe you had jobs where you could do that. Important jobs that some men have require 100% attention during the day and you can't comprehend that.

[Asker]

He just works 3 hours per day lol