If a guy invites you over to his house for a movie date after one good date, is it a red flag?

Question

I think I know the answer already, but still let’s hear it.
Although he suggested alternatives as well in public or movie theatres when I strictly said no, but he also asked why I don’t trust him and promised not to touch me if I come over.

lilBigPotato · Accepted Answer

I mean, it's obvious what he tries to get out of it. If trying to get touchy on the second date is a red flag, that entirely depends on you. Different people have different standards and dating styles.

I don't see the suggestion itself as a major issue. Personally I go by vibes and sometimes I'm happy to accept and sometimes I prefer to wait.

What is however a red flag to me is his response. It should be absolutely clear to anyone with 3 braincells why a girl might reject that offer at that point. Doubling down by asking why and making some stupid promise is an idiotic move. I would expect any guy with a brain and some respect to just take the L and suggest something better. I don't expect an apology or anything. Just to respect my decision and have some patience. Or be honest and end it there if you just hope for sex and nothing else. Because to fuck around we don't need to keep dating.

beenherebefore · Accepted Answer

Hmmm yea I would think is a bit too soon for me to go to your house. Plus I don’t think that’s a productive date, dates are meant to get to know each other. Watching a movie is like two people watching TV together. I think is trying to hook up.

ohsheeT · Accepted Answer

Well I wouldn't or couldn't really answer this or give a thumbs up or down because I don't know him. But I will say. When you told him no. And he said why. And then he said I won't touch you. ... he could of said 100 other things. But he said I won't touch you.. that's the biggest red flag.

First of all it's to soon for a movie night. And lets. Just say OK you said yes I would have said. What? What did you say. ... then noooo we can't have a movie nite so soon because I really like you and if there became a moment we started making out I wouldn't want to control myself so nooooo we can't have a movie night lmao

Summeroflove · Accepted Answer

If you don’t feel comfortable don’t…. Just say no sorry I don’t feel comfortable doing that yet. It’s normal to feel skeptical of either going to someone’s house or having someone over to your house too soon. Someone whose decent will respect your wishes and won’t be pushy.

It’s gaslighting. Him getting defensive. I mean you barely know him. Do you expect him to trust you either? No. Trust is earned by both persons. I think you have your answer. This dude is weird.

AviatorTom · Answer

If you are that worried about going to a guy's house to watch a movie, that guy is not for you.

Seems you are a victim of radical feminism that teaches that all men are bad. We're not. And trust yourself. Had you gone to the guy's house and watched a movie, if he made a move on you, you can stop him. Most likely, he was looking for your companionship, and watching a movie at home is less expensive than going to a theater.

Bitter_Sweet94 · Answer

Not automatically, but it depends on context and pace.

If the first date was respectful, public, and you felt safe and genuinely connected, an invite like that can simply mean he’s comfortable and interested.

It becomes a red flag if,

* He skips public dates altogether and rushes to private ones

* He pushes the idea even after you hesitate

* The invite feels more sexual than intentional

* You sense pressure instead of ease

A green flag response is how he reacts if you say,
“I’d rather do something public again first.”

If he respects that without sulking or pushing, you’re fine.

If he tries to negotiate your boundary, that’s your answer.

Early dating isn’t about rules, it’s about how someone handles your comfort.

mysteriousNicholas · Answer

@pearl222 I think you and I know that it may lead to - cuddling. 🍿"Oops, I dropped my popcorn" oggling giggle he says. 👀 Lol don't wear a low cut top then 😅.

Men will be men. Personally though lady, it could all just be a simple humble date or a date that doesn't lead to anything. Or you and him are just hanging out. Just hanging out 😶

Personally though in my wisdom I've learnt in my 20s to learn - I think most folks usually prefer dates in public venues "cause who knows what man or woman isn't a creeper or is a part creeper nowadays"

Lol 😂 especially first daters aka 'im 25 and never been on a date' 😄. No I've been on a date and are 31.2 lol - got stood up once, got rejected a few times by diff women. Ah well, it's good memories now

Zack-Bann · Answer

I don’t think it’s a red flag
But it’s also not an innocent request

I don’t know what you guys talked about on date one in terms of what each of you looking for

Either way, there is no wrong answer here
You either wanna have sex so you go over there
Or you don’t and you turn him down

How he deals with that is his problem

InknKink · Answer

Pro tip for men... don't invite women for a date at your house the first time she comes over. Invite her on a date somewhere else but have her meet you at your place and than leave from there. Builds trust and comfort.

As for answering this question... movie dates in a private space means sex. Or at least an attempt as escalating physical intimacy. No other reason to have a date at your place than the increased privacy.

lightbulb27 · Answer

its too far too fast...

not a red flag, it's a yellow flag. the referees stop the game, sort out what is going on, and commence the game again.

make sure you play the game by the rules. otherwise, it can become a mess and you'll be out here asking much different questions.

OneViewpoint · Answer

Depends on the guy and how comfortable the girl feels. Maybe he's a chill guy with a nice home theater and he just wants to lounge around at home in comfort and save a few bucks. Maybe he's hoping to get in your panties because he's a Chad! You be the judge. "No" is an acceptable answer.

Jammannn · Answer

It sounds like you’d already made up your mind when you strictly said no, rather than redirecting straight to something you were comfortable with. Were you already turned off when he suggested coming over after one good date?

Plenty of relationships do start with sex on the first date there’s research suggesting people who are more open to intimacy are often more open to connection too. If the interest was there, it seems like pivoting to a public option (like he suggested) would’ve felt fine.

His comment about trust and promising not to touch you reads less like a threat and more like insecurity or desperation still not attractive, but not automatically a red flag either.

Steak_D_Bone · Answer

So you don't want some penis, and would rather have pillow fights and do each other's hair? Why even do the date if you're not trying to get some penis? Are you just after the free food or something?

Tarifa · Answer

If he promises not to touch you, it's already on his mind.

You should of course view it in the bigger picture : are you dating, or is it pure, platonic friendship? These considerations matter in the expectations you both may have and in the final outcome.

Paul_in_Indy · Answer

I don’t know if it’s a red flag, but it is definitely an invitation for sex. If you’re not ready for that, I wouldn’t go to his house for a date

sage2021 · Answer

Just because he says he's not going to touch you doesn't mean he won't try. I've been lied to like that before.🙄

slatyb · Answer

Red flag that he doesn't understand your reluctance. He's either stupid or lying about his intentions. Trust your feeling here.

loveslongnails · Answer

Promising not to touch you is the same as saying "I can't read the room". If he asked you "why don't you trust me" after one date, it shows he doesn't know much about trust. If you're still dating this guy in 2026, I'll be shocked.

Bricealan · Answer

@pearl222 Yes, too soon for an invite to his house... although, I have done the same thing, on several occasions,

Truthatanycost · Answer

If you're dating a truly godly man, then it is simply what he says it is. If not, then it's likely a redflag.

melanieeeB · Answer

To the movie theater? Okay yeah, not a red flag yet To his home? Yes, he is literally saying let's have sex at my place lol

NoDecision · Answer

Promises, promises. Do you believe everything you hear?

fantasticass · Answer

YES!!!, run like hell and don't look back. He just wants to fuck you and throw you to the curb like trash after he fucks you. Don't be a pickmesha

Anonymous · Answer

I've been to guys houses on the first date and they're perfectly respectful. We might make out or he might feel me up but that's about it and only if I want it.

AngryCarl2 · Answer

Netflix and Chill? That's not a red flag, it's a sexy flag.

ABC1x1x · Answer

Yes. You should live alone sage with your cat forever

chickychickyparmparm · Answer

I guy takes you on a date and then wants to go on another date and this is a problem?

Pohjolan · Answer

Why would it be a red flag if its not later on? He is just a bit too enthusiastic.

RedInnocent69 · Answer

Not if you want him to fuck you. That’s what home dates always are

exitseven · Answer

iot means he is cheap.

NathanDavis · Answer

"promise" lol...

purplepoppy · Answer

Nah. He probably just wants sec.

Jennz6 · Answer

I’m sure it will be charming 💦💧🤷‍♀️

Clyde_123 · Answer

Yes sounds like he can't wait to have sex.

Siajanua2027 · Answer

He, most likely, wants to have sex.

guesswhereivebeen · Answer

What’s the mystery… he’s trying to beat it up

Anonymous · Answer

No, it means he likes you a lot.

TallMan89 · Answer

You better be ready for a good long night

RHK36 · Answer

He's trying to smash

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